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Thursday, May 20, 2010

Teh Internets Would You Live with a Man Who Tracks His Bowel Movements?

Posted by Cienna Madrid on Thu, May 20, 2010 at 4:33 PM

How about one who demands that you do the same?

These are the questions I wrestle with.

Comments (49) RSS

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See, keeping track of your bowel movements is fine, but expecting me to track mine for the sake of your personal satisfaction? No way. I'll keep track of my bowel movements for my own reasons, thank you very much.

Posted by Hernandez

on May 20, 2010 at 4:42 PM

Small price to pay for a place with natural light.

Posted by lotosesser on May 20, 2010 at 4:45 PM

It's a way to let the roommate know...."I wouldn't go in there for 35-45 minutes..."

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe

on May 20, 2010 at 4:45 PM

What's weird about that?

Posted by Lee on May 20, 2010 at 4:47 PM

Sinker
Floater
Floater
halfway
sinker
sinker
sinker (string of junky food)
floater
floater
non-solid...

Posted by Drew2u on May 20, 2010 at 4:48 PM

No space for weight or type?

Posted by giffy on May 20, 2010 at 4:51 PM

O.K. But you have to clip your nose hair in my soup. Small thing really.

Posted by Vince on May 20, 2010 at 4:53 PM

"IF" i have a bowel movement each day?

Posted by Max Solomon on May 20, 2010 at 4:53 PM

@8, some people's normal is every other. One of the best little Graham Greene characters was a CIA agent who kept a notebook detailing the volume of his every pee.

Posted by gloomy gus on May 20, 2010 at 4:55 PM

@8 Seriously, I could just X off the entire month in advance and be done with it.

Posted by Kris on May 20, 2010 at 4:55 PM

Does he want photos too?

Posted by very bad homo on May 20, 2010 at 4:57 PM

2 words, anal retentive.

Posted by linda with a y on May 20, 2010 at 4:57 PM

I meant the Room-er.

Posted by linda with a y on May 20, 2010 at 5:00 PM

Oh, and he also forgot to mention that the entire inside of the house is covered with tinfoil.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty

on May 20, 2010 at 5:09 PM

"I really enjoy, reading, hiking, playing kickball with my friends, SCATPLAY, and drinking good beer:)"

Posted by pissy mcslogbot on May 20, 2010 at 5:18 PM

Ummm... pass!!

Posted by Reverse Polarity on May 20, 2010 at 5:19 PM

Can't you tell that it's a semi-phony ad? DoD and Georgetown in Seattle? 5th St NE being in cap hill?

The ad appeared here before someone copy/pasted it into the seattle CL:

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/r…

Posted by stinkbug on May 20, 2010 at 5:22 PM

Fifty-Two-Eighty, you're back! I mean you look like yourself again. Well, the OTHER you. I'm waiting for Cato to get back to himself too. Is it just me or does it seem the comments don't have the same snarky sparkle without the right avatar?

Dopey, I know. I get that a lot.

Posted by linda with a y on May 20, 2010 at 5:27 PM

@17 Um, the ad in the screenshot is the same ad as the one in your link. Look at the reply email address.

Posted by doug on May 20, 2010 at 5:27 PM

Oops, I guess the screenshot is from the original dc listing. Duh, my bad.

Posted by stinkbug on May 20, 2010 at 5:27 PM

@17 Where are you getting that it was from CL Seattle? It says Best of Craigslist on the image. Of course its DC. You know the Capitol.

Posted by giffy on May 20, 2010 at 5:28 PM

Does his research involve... bowel movements? And he's looking for subjects?

Posted by w7ngman

on May 20, 2010 at 5:43 PM

No, Linda, it's not dopey at all.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty

on May 20, 2010 at 5:45 PM

It still could be fake. People post troll-y ads like this all the time in hopes of getting on Best of Craigslist.

Posted by w7ngman

on May 20, 2010 at 5:46 PM

@8/10

Right?

I think the deal is, people who eat (metaphorical) crap don't (literally) crap.

Posted by Violet_DaGrinder

on May 20, 2010 at 5:53 PM

Also, WHAT THE FUCK, dude.

Posted by Violet_DaGrinder

on May 20, 2010 at 5:53 PM

Maybe he uses 2000 Flushes and likes to keep track.

Posted by gregg on May 20, 2010 at 6:10 PM

Even better, let's come up with a poop rating system we can agree on, and then HAVE A COMPETITION!!!!!!

Posted by Chris in Vancouver WA on May 20, 2010 at 6:21 PM

It's based on the plot of that sitcom
about nerds on CBS. It was on Wednesday.

Posted by meks on May 20, 2010 at 6:28 PM

Um, the ad poster doesn't identify his or her gender anywhere that I can see. Nice job assuming it's a dude. Makes me wish I lived in D.C. though. I'd move in there just so I could buy a few cases of Baby Ruths and leave 'em floating all the time. He or she would think I was a perpetual poop machine! Little Debbie fudge nut brownies also work great if you break 'em apart and roll 'em up.

Posted by nightlifejitters on May 20, 2010 at 7:06 PM

I'm not sure which is more disturbing, an adult playing kickball regularly or the roommate-bowel-tracking.

Posted by emma's bee on May 20, 2010 at 7:06 PM

Obviously there should be a rent discount involved.

Posted by g on May 20, 2010 at 7:15 PM

Mommy? Is that you????

Posted by foolish-rain on May 20, 2010 at 7:17 PM

Did it say what you were supposed to make the checkmark with?

Posted by Grover on May 20, 2010 at 7:42 PM

Rumor has it that there's a theater in Seattle that keeps a "Poop Log" tracking the movements of some of the city's favorite performers. Just saying.

Posted by bouncehouse on May 20, 2010 at 7:53 PM

Luckily, I only poop at work.

Posted by Matt from Denver on May 20, 2010 at 8:36 PM

I'm vegan and I poop 3 times a day, minimum.

Posted by Never trust an ex-vegan on May 20, 2010 at 8:53 PM

$850 to put up with that kind of shit, literally and metaphorically? FUCK NO.

P.S. Here's a good housewarming gift:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_Sto…

Posted by Greg on May 20, 2010 at 10:37 PM

@38 Actually, $850 is quite cheap for this town. Cheap enough to consider it . . .

Posted by DCGirl on May 21, 2010 at 6:54 AM

Maybe he has an urban septic system. Or maybe he wants to competitively compare frequency and sizes. Bah, 6 Courics? I just dropped an 18 Couric.

Posted by Reg on May 21, 2010 at 8:22 AM

His shit list really IS a shit list.

Posted by Urgutha Forka on May 21, 2010 at 9:25 AM

@31,
A friend of mine lived in DC for a while and said kick ball leagues are a big thing there.

Posted by Urgutha Forka on May 21, 2010 at 9:27 AM

When they insist on knowing my bliss
I tell them this
When they want to know what the reason is
I only smile when I lie, then I tell them why
(Because your shit) your shit is on my list
(Because your shit) your shit is on my list
Because your shit is on my list of the best things in life
(Because your shit) your shit is on my list
(Because your shit) your shit I can't resist
(Because your shit is what I miss) when I turn off the light

Posted by Daryl Hall & "John Notes" on May 21, 2010 at 9:55 AM

I'd be tempted to move in just to fuck with his head, and only check the box once every 18 days or so. You KNOW he'd get all anxiety-ridden and develop tics. It'd be fun to watch.

Posted by Geni on May 21, 2010 at 11:17 AM

I requested more info..and yes I asked "Sooo, what's with the bathroom chart? Bit of humor?"

He replied..."No I'm serious. It's just for my records and my peace of mind. I don't publish the list :) I'm available all next week after 5pm. Are you still interested in the place?"

Posted by IronHammer on May 21, 2010 at 1:11 PM

I immediately thought of Sheldon on "The Big Bang Theory". Does no-one watch the show?

Posted by really - it's hysterical! on May 21, 2010 at 4:01 PM

@41: Sadly, I guessed as much. Still stand by my statement, though. It's a slippery slope to dodgeball.

Posted by emma's bee on May 21, 2010 at 4:16 PM

@45 Oh, it's just for his records and peace of mind. In that case, it's a completely reasonable demand.

Posted by northeastthreat on May 21, 2010 at 4:59 PM

Another DC person here. 5th St NE is right next to the metro line, and walking distance to the Capital and Library of Congress, so $825 is a good deal. I have to admit that I'd at least go look at the place if I was room-hunting.

I live over on 9th St. NE right now. If he really wants to track poo habits up close, he should come hang out in my alley to observe the bums. Piles of it under my kitchen window every week (can't wait till this lease is up!)

Posted by sweettreehugger on May 22, 2010 at 4:41 PM