George "Lift My Luggage" Rekers has a website and a blog called "Teen Sex Today." Seriously. "Professor George" is giving sex advice to teenagers.

Why my blog on teen sex? As a doctor, I’ve talked to way too many teens who are downright angry at the rotten sex advice they’ve heard from adults. Hey, most adults give teens hardly any helpful information about sex in the first place. And then when so-called “experts” step forward to give sex advice, much of it is just flat wrong! Illogical and unscientific sex information can be found all over the Internet, on TV and radio, and even school books. Not only is this totally unfair, but I’ve had teen patients who have been physically and emotionally damaged by following the misleading advice from adults that teens expect to have the right answer.

Teens deserve better! You want straight talk and straight facts from a real expert who really cares about what’s best for you!

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

Hey, you can send your teen sex questions—where can I rent a teen? how much do teens charge these days?—to "Professor George" at teensextoday@ProfessorGeorge.com. Remember, kids, he's an "expert"! And you can visit the Teen Sex Today's Facebook page and write all over his wall.

Thanks to Slog tipper Travis.