Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« What I Did on Spring Break | Tonight: Lunatic Farmer Joel Salati… »

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Books Useless Books I Have Gotten in the Mail, Part 20: Girlfriends Are Lifesavers

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Apr 20, 2010 at 2:22 PM

What's the book? Girlfriends Are Lifesavers by Reeda Joseph.

Why is it useless? It's a collection of vintage photographs of women palling around with one-sentence platitudes on each page: "We've gotten through some pretty tough times together, like bathing suit season!" "Rain or shine...we've got each other's back!" "The trick is to not let men know that we're smarter." It's the kind of thing you buy at the last minute for someone you don't really like when you feel obligated to attend her birthday party.

Could anyone enjoy this book? You know what? That's not even a question. Nobody could really enjoy this book unless they're living a lie. The thing I'm wondering is: Who the fuck thinks "You know where Girlfriends Are Lifesavers really needs to go? It needs to go directly to The Stranger's offices! They'll really understand the book's message about 'friendship with love, laughter, and heartfelt care.'" So many of these fuckups could be avoided if PR people actually took two seconds to look at the publications they're targeting. Instead, they paid postage and wasted a comp copy of a useless, stupid book.

Comments (14) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

I want to make my own version in the same style and call it "You Say Glass Ceiling, I Say Tasteful Skylight".

It will be full of fantastic one-liners like:
"I will always remember the look on your mistress' face"
"Wage disparity? Not when my husband buys me things"
"The best part of giving birth repeatedly is staying home to take care of the kids"
"I don't understand basketball, but it beats watching what I want"

Posted by Baconcat on April 20, 2010 at 2:34 PM

So they ran out of 'funny picture blogs' to give book deals to, and moved on to tacky gift shop fridge magnets?

Posted by chrisrnps

on April 20, 2010 at 2:35 PM

Sounds like a collection of Hallmark cards.

Posted by Fnarf

on April 20, 2010 at 2:37 PM

"Sounds like a collection of Hallmark card rejects."

FTFY

Posted by RL is too lazy to log in on April 20, 2010 at 2:43 PM

Oh, Paul... Let's just go get a chocotini and an eyebrow wax and forget about this silly ol' book. Land's sake...

This is tailor made for midwestern malls and hospital visits. Who said publishing was dead?

Posted by Michael Wells on April 20, 2010 at 2:44 PM

Sounds like something my mother-in-law will send me for Christmas. Watch for it at Value Village come January.

Posted by Durang Durang

on April 20, 2010 at 2:44 PM

Not true! My mom, my aunt, and many of my friends' moms actually love this shit. When they come to visit, they actually drag us to the gift shops to pick stuff like this up. It makes me worry for my own future taste.

To be fair, though, I hear many one sentence platitudes such as these spoken by people my own age in yoga class and at Madison Market. When you find a way to attach Eastern philosphy to them, they apparently become poignant.

Posted by virginia mason on April 20, 2010 at 2:44 PM