Slog
News & ArtsFriday, April 2, 2010
Politics DON'T FILL OUT YOUR CENSUS FORMS*
Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Apr 2, 2010 at 10:01 AM
Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Batshit) explains why:
* But only if you're a right-wing lunatic. If you're a sensible person who lives in blue state, or a reliably Democratic congressional district, it's perfectly safe to fill out your census form and your participation in the census could mean another congressional seat for your state and more federal and state funding. Because Obama's jackbooted thugs are not going to round you up. So fill that form out! But if you live in a Republican district—like, you know, Michele Bachman's—you're going to want to play it safe and tear up that census form. Because socialism! Stalin! Hitler! Gay marriage!
1
Dammit, I forgot to check "no: on the question that asked if I was a "Right Wing Loonie Bin."
See ya'll in the camps ... Bachmann for Republican Nominee in 2012!!!
See ya'll in the camps ... Bachmann for Republican Nominee in 2012!!!
2
Let's hope Sarah Palin doesn't win in 2012... It would really put a damper on my day to get put in a camp somewhere because I put a certain pink sticker on the back of my census... I could move to the Netherlands I guess.
3
You know, when Seattle gets another congressional seat, it's going to be oh so sweet.
I forget, do I count dust bunnies as Native Americans or White?
I forget, do I count dust bunnies as Native Americans or White?
6
Isn't it illegal for her to encourage people to ignore a Constitutional law or something? I thought she LOVED the Constitution!
Also, Nate Silver points out that this campaign may well backfire on these whackos in an awesome way—if red districts fail to return their census in great numbers, they'll lose seats. Maybe even hers. Shhhhhh...
Also, Nate Silver points out that this campaign may well backfire on these whackos in an awesome way—if red districts fail to return their census in great numbers, they'll lose seats. Maybe even hers. Shhhhhh...
7
The deepest irony of course is that this nut would have been 100% in favor of internment had she been around during WWII. Probably would have been a big fan of McCarthy too.
12
@6 My thoughts exactly. If they don't want to fill out their census forms, woohoo for the rest of us! Fewer idiots to represent in the legislature.
13
@6, states do their own districting. All the Census does is determine how many seats each state gets, not how or where they'll be apportioned within the state. A blue state getting more seats might be able to juggle things around to make more Dem districts. A red state's legislature would, of course, favor creating more GOP seats. Gerrymandering is an equal-opportunity treat. I just love those districts that are 50 feet wide and 100 miles long.
Due to population growth, there are some red states which stand to benefit from added seats. Texas might take 3 or 4 seats away from other states. God bless Bachmann, for scaring those yahoos away from sending in their forms!
Due to population growth, there are some red states which stand to benefit from added seats. Texas might take 3 or 4 seats away from other states. God bless Bachmann, for scaring those yahoos away from sending in their forms!
15
And you know, it's not like it was super-hard to figure out who the Japanese people were back in 1942. Or even now, for that matter. So I doubt filling out your census will magically prevent the "big gummint roundup!" that these nutjobs believe is going to take place.
17
The real reason why she is saying this crazy shit is that her district it possibly going to be re-arranged and therefor she may lose her job. She is from a district north of Minneapolis that was constructed in a way to have Republican stronghold. But it is too large and doesn't make any sense. If all of those people turn in their census forms, there is a better chance that it will be broken up and the Republicans will lose power. And she may be out of a job.
18
Boycotting the census is dumb. It's like boycotting taxes. You have to do it, you don't get a choice!
19
She is as bad as the Congress man that was concerned about Guam tipping over. Nut cases on all sides.
20
And yeah, it's "unenforceable," the gov't can't force you to turn in your census form... but the liberal media (NPR) told me that they will be sending people to knock on doors, and if that doesn't work they'll start asking your neighbors about you and get their information that way. I would love for some of these wackos to have the government get its information from neighbors who think they're insane...
21
In Garrison Keillor's sane, sensible Minnasoda, however did this shrewish harridan get elected to Congress? Yes, I know those are misogynistic words, but truth still remains a defense.
22
You know what? This is a great idea. And then the little red districts can completely fuck themselves out of representation and funding and it's all their own fucking fault.
It must have been fucking BONECHILLING before they had a postal service to send census forms, and they had to send PEOPLE.
http://twitpic.com/1co4u8
It must have been fucking BONECHILLING before they had a postal service to send census forms, and they had to send PEOPLE.
http://twitpic.com/1co4u8
24
@23, my thoughts exactly. All I need to know about the video is summed up neatly in the freeze frame: "Census mandated by Constitution" + Bachmann looking... insane.
25
If I may quote my right wing, devout Christian friends who looked at me with condescension and disgust when I told them my fears of George Bush's wiretapping and Patriot Act terrorist surveillance....."If you've done nothing wrong, you have nothing to worry about."
26
Maybe someone needs to remind her that even Jesus' earthly dad was schlepping his unborn ass back to Bethlehem for the census. If he stood by this nut bags thinking, perhaps ol' J.C. never would have risen to power.
On second thought... that aint such a bad idea.
On second thought... that aint such a bad idea.
27
Congressional seats are allocated based on total state enumerated population, so you don't want to be discouraging right wing crazies in crazy right wing districts that are in a patriotic Blue state from filling out a census.
Just the ones in unpatriotic Red states.
Just the ones in unpatriotic Red states.
28
oh, and I checked, and dust bunnies in patriotic Blue states are indeed Native Americans. Surprisingly, they're also Hispanic.
Who knew?
Who knew?
29
I love the whole "I'm not saying Obama wants to herd us all into camps, I'm just heavily implying it" bit she does. Well, I'm not saying Michele Bachmann likes to fellate farmyard animals in her spare time...
32
@11:
In Article 1, Section 2 of the Constitution of the United States of America:
"[An] Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct."
(http://www.usconstitution.net/consttop_c…)
There is nothing in the Constitution about gays and the military. Also, the leaders of the armed forces are allowed to enforce their laws as they feel proper. STFU&DIAF, Alleged, you whiny punk-ass bitch.
@30: "This woman blows goats; I have proof", to paraphrase a motion picture.
In Article 1, Section 2 of the Constitution of the United States of America:
"[An] Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct."
(http://www.usconstitution.net/consttop_c…)
There is nothing in the Constitution about gays and the military. Also, the leaders of the armed forces are allowed to enforce their laws as they feel proper. STFU&DIAF, Alleged, you whiny punk-ass bitch.
@30: "This woman blows goats; I have proof", to paraphrase a motion picture.
33
Actually, 22, there's a very funny Fred MacMurray movie made on that very idea. Census taker among hillbillies gets mistaken for...oh, it's too complicated to describe! Look it up "Murder, He Says"
35
Recently I've been looking up my family ancestry in old census returns. It's fun! It's like a treasure hunt. I'm glad my family wasn't boycotting the census back in 1880.
(The census does not become public until 72 years after it's taken, in case you're worried.)
(The census does not become public until 72 years after it's taken, in case you're worried.)
37
Like Obama has any desire (let alone power) to round people up. I'd be much more worried about Sarah "Real Americans" Palin and her ilk.
39
I live in Bachmann's district(though not by choice, and this year will be my first chance to vote against her.), and my census form has been returned. Sure, not returning it might result in fewer people counted, but it would likely just result in a visit from a census worker. I'd prefer to avoid that.
Beyond that, fewer people in my district might mean that Minnesota loses a congressional district(it might lose it anyway, but...), which means one fewer electoral vote from a relatively liberal state, and probably one more for, oh, Texas.
And Sarah Palin shows us that, if you're crazy enough to make the news, lacking any actual power makes not a whit of difference to how much we hear about someone.
Beyond that, fewer people in my district might mean that Minnesota loses a congressional district(it might lose it anyway, but...), which means one fewer electoral vote from a relatively liberal state, and probably one more for, oh, Texas.
And Sarah Palin shows us that, if you're crazy enough to make the news, lacking any actual power makes not a whit of difference to how much we hear about someone.
40
What @7 said. If this nutbag had been in Congress during WWII, she would have been screaming for internment. She also said that the Japanese were deprived of their constitutional rights. But the Supreme Court held that they weren't (in the infamous Korematsu case).
41
Just on the down low - nobody is going to be rounding up the straights based on the census information, are they?
( ; =
( ; =
42
Bachman does realize that Census results tie directly into the amount of aid FEMA is allowed to dole out after a disaster, right? Oh, she doesn't? Because she's a f@cking lunatic? Oh. And she's and ELECTED official? Hmm. That's sad, right? Yeah.
43
Ironically, the only people I'd want to round up are the ones least likely to fill out this form.
44
@42 Don't you know, if there's a big enough natural disaster it's God's will and he'll dip his hand down from the heavens and scoop up all the good Christians and leave the gays and Democrats and Evolutionists and Census takers to fend for themselves!
46
@39: Yeah, there's a lot of information suggesting Bachmann might lose her seat in the Census anyway. I'm wondering if that's why she's going on Fox News telling the rest of the country to not mail it back.
But then again, she's telling her own constituents not to mail it back either, so I think she's probably not really connecting the dots.
Either way, this "tea party" vs. "census" move on the part of Bachmann and her Fox News followers is really, really stupid. It's stupid because it's absurd, yes, but it's also stupid because it's just stupid. It only hurts the people who refuse to fill it out, who, in this case, may end up being the conservatives. Go for it, guys!
But then again, she's telling her own constituents not to mail it back either, so I think she's probably not really connecting the dots.
Either way, this "tea party" vs. "census" move on the part of Bachmann and her Fox News followers is really, really stupid. It's stupid because it's absurd, yes, but it's also stupid because it's just stupid. It only hurts the people who refuse to fill it out, who, in this case, may end up being the conservatives. Go for it, guys!
47
@42: Actually, people on the lunatic fringe tend to think that FEMA is being turned into a secret-police organization to round up and imprison law-abiding Americans (and that's why it hasn't been doing its ACTUAL job very well these days). It's a scarily large movement that thinks so. The Southern Poverty Law Center did a good report on those nutjobs.
http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/in…
http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/in…
49
yes, please dont fill it out right wing nutbags. we'll be happy when you lose all that gubmint money and congressional seats!!
51
Knowing her (and I do, I grew up in her district)? She's doing it entirely because she has a vendetta against the public servants who would be receiving the money they need to continue having a job. It's really worrying to me because both my parents live there, have always voted against Bachmann, and are both public servants (a teacher and a librarian).
I've said it before and I'll say it again: there is absolutely no reason that Bachmann's district should even exist. The Republicans messed with district borders to include the two right-wing areas in MN as one district, even though they're NOWHERE NEAR each other.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: there is absolutely no reason that Bachmann's district should even exist. The Republicans messed with district borders to include the two right-wing areas in MN as one district, even though they're NOWHERE NEAR each other.
52
Michele is batshit crazy, that's never been a secret. This census bit is pretty mild compared to some of the other theories that she's floated--consider her theory that linked swine flu to Dems in the White House. Batshit doesn't begin to cover it.
For your viewing pleasure:
http://www.minnpost.com/minnclips/2009/0…
I only wish I lived in her district so I could vote against the silly bitch.
For your viewing pleasure:
http://www.minnpost.com/minnclips/2009/0…
I only wish I lived in her district so I could vote against the silly bitch.
55
@52 - No, you don't. Trust me, you really, REALLY don't. The people who live there elected her because they're LIKE her...only more so.
Yes, you read that right...her constituents are more insane than her.
Yes, you read that right...her constituents are more insane than her.
56
Michelle Bachmann seems to be the American politician who comes up most often when you google "batshit crazy". Watch out Tom Cruise!
57
hmm. i googled batshit crazy and went to images.
tom cruise, sarah palin, batboy, michelle bachman, and michelle malkin.
interesting bunch.
tom cruise, sarah palin, batboy, michelle bachman, and michelle malkin.
interesting bunch.
58
I'm not watching the video because Bachmann makes my brain twitch in painful ways. But the crazy eyes in the video still kind of say it all...
59
as a Minnesotan, I can say I am ashamed to be int he same state as her, and that Minnesotans as a whole are nothing like this "liberal agenda OMGWTFBBQ LIBERALS LIBERALS ARE OUT TO RUIN THE COUNTRY" f**knut. Sadly we seem to keep electing idiots of any political affiliation... my advice is to throw out everyone in elected office in minnesota except for oberstar maybe, he's okay... at least in district 8 we can elect reps okay :) just not city officials.
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