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Thursday, March 18, 2010

News The Morning News: Barbara Boxer, Jihad Jane, and Sandra Bullock

Posted by Lindy West on Thu, Mar 18, 2010 at 7:55 AM

TKO. Barbara Boxer might lose her Senate seat.

"Maybe it's not the Islamic faith that is making them do this; maybe it's just their personal demons." "Jihad Jane" faces arraignment.

Lame. Palestinian rocket kills Thai kibbutz worker in Israel.

"Only 300 priests were actual cases of paedophilia... it is not as widespread as has been believed." The pope continues to plan to say something about sex abuse.

Hahahahahahahaaha. Al Qaeda "is on the run, but still coming after us," says CIA.

Naw, It's Cool. I'll Just Hang Out Here. Under Water. Some Fargo residents aren't moving, despite flood warnings.

Science? OR REVENGE? Authorities kill two wolves to find out if they ate that lady. "They are not human predators. It's healthy to have awareness of them, for sure. But to be afraid of them is too strong an emotion."

What? New Jersey wants to go on a bear hunt?

She Really, Um, Raised His Barn, If You Know What I Mean. Tattooed Amish chick claims to have boned Sandra Bullock's husband.

Waaaaaahhhh!!! Government issues recall of 1.2 million hazardous high chairs.

"I hope they work it out and that he returns to golf." Someone wastes the president's time asking about Tiger Woods.

And finally, Depressed Woman Touching a Wall...

Comments (14) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

Lindy, I really love it when you do the morning news. It makes my day much better.

Posted by emilythehaikubot

on March 18, 2010 at 8:05 AM

Bear hunt?

RUN, JOE MY GOD, RUN! THEY'RE COMING AFTER YOU!

Posted by Baconcat on March 18, 2010 at 8:11 AM

I detest Sandra Bullock. I am an old school fan of Janine Lindemulder (James' ex wife) and I think Bullock did her wrong trying to prevent custody rights for her. Now she is getting her just desserts.

Posted by NumberOne on March 18, 2010 at 8:24 AM

When the CIA starts bragging, it's time to start worrying.

Posted by Vince on March 18, 2010 at 8:34 AM

*Only* 300 pedophile priests. What a relief.

Posted by mmennonno

on March 18, 2010 at 8:40 AM

The B-Roll guy is hawt.

Posted by mmennonno

on March 18, 2010 at 8:44 AM

The important things is whether "Jihad Jane"'s personal demons were inflicted upon her by the Christian Devil or the Islamic Devil... is there an Islamic Devil? Oh yeah, it's all made up anyway, nvm.

Posted by OuterCow on March 18, 2010 at 8:48 AM

Don't judge the B-roll!

Posted by sepiolida on March 18, 2010 at 9:43 AM

Lame? A Thai immigrant who did no harm to anyone gets killed by people who clearly intended to kill someone, and you call it lame? What would have made it less lame - if an Israeli had been killed, would that have made it better?

Talk about poor taste...

Posted by a lurker on March 18, 2010 at 9:52 AM

I could live with Campbell, but, dear God, please don't let Fiorina win. That bitch already wrecked HP. Now we're supposed to let her wreck the entire country?

Meg "Let's put a Buy It Now button the governor's office" Whitman as governor and Fiorina as Senator. We would all know what hell looks like at that point.

Posted by igub on March 18, 2010 at 10:01 AM