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News & ArtsTuesday, March 16, 2010
Savage Love DePauw University
Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Mar 16, 2010 at 7:21 PM
Some of the questions put to me tonight by students at DePauw University...
I like going down on my boyfriend but he often has a pretty funky smell down there... like it makes me want to puke. How can I talk to him about it or make it go away?
Does having an enema fetish mean you're into scat? I don't want to be into scat.
Why do you think closeted lesbians have a difficult time coming out in a sorority?
What are the best ways to incorporate food into your sex life?
If I cross over to the side of prostitution (to help pay for studying abroad) can I ever come back?
Making a long-distance relationship work?
Is it okay for people in queer relationships to not conform to heterosexual standards of what a relationship should be, i.e. one sex partner?
Some of my answers: you should be able to say anything to a man whose dick you've got in your mouth (and that includes take a bath, stank bomb (remove dick first)); not scat, splat; closeted lesbians who've joined sororities have a difficult time coming out because they were dumb enough to join sororities in the first place; about the only time Americans aren't "incorporating" food into their fat asses is when they're having sex and I'd like to keep it that way; most people who cross over to prostitution cross right back; I'm away a lot but my boyfriend and I actually live together; no.
1
That last question reminds me how vigorously intellectual we slutty freshmen believed ourselves to be. Ah! the scarves.
3
Since when is sticking to one sex partner a heterosexual standard? Plenty of straight people have multiple partners, and plenty of gays are getting married, or demanding the right to. It's not really a gays vs. straights thing.
4
Points for making me chuckle while I am crying. Perhaps it is a bit strange that I look to SLOG for elements of normalcy? Still, you guys make me smile and I am thankful.
6
It's my life, Dan. People we love have strokes, and we have to bring them home to die. Good thing we have hospice. Thanks, though.
I just come here, because no-one looks at me to see if I am going to break down or if I'm crying again. And, laughing while crying is good. Thanks again for the chuckle.
I've got to go play ping-pong now.
I just come here, because no-one looks at me to see if I am going to break down or if I'm crying again. And, laughing while crying is good. Thanks again for the chuckle.
I've got to go play ping-pong now.
8
Kimmie, honey, it's OK to cry. Life isn't supposed to be easy. But it is good. Don't forget that, because that piece of good in there is me, dammit. Hang onto it through the good times and the bad.
9
My best to you Kim. You're amazing and an incredibly strong person. For all of your support to me through your comments here on slog, directly and indirectly, thank you.
10
My thoughts go out to you, Kim. My wife and I are going through something similar with my father in law, albeit more drawn out which gives us more time to process it while he's still here. (He has a Parkinson's or ALS-like disease that was never pinpointed, and since it's not Parkinson's, there's no treatment to give.)
Take care, and remember that most of us love you, even if we haven't met face to face.
Take care, and remember that most of us love you, even if we haven't met face to face.
11
I dunno if you can draw strength from internet weirdos like us, but if you can, please do, Kim. Everyone here thinks you're terrific. Be strong, cry, swear, whatever it takes. Can you feel us thinking of you?
12
Take good care, Kim. Crying is good. Weird-o internet community is also good. So is breathing. So are baths.
14
The moment we legitimate smoking dope and selling a piece of ass is the moment we realize we could free the world by taxing pot and pussy.
15
Weirdos? Speak for yourself, Fnarf. Maybe you could stuff a handful of quarters up your nose to cheer her up.
16
@3 -- I think you're looking at that question the wrong way. I think the way the asker meant the question was "Should being gay inherently give you more of a free pass regarding monogamy?"
And it really shouldn't.
And it really shouldn't.
19
Kim, I've only commented a couple of times and one of those times was to profess my straight girl crush on you, but I want to say, as a long time reader of Slog and your comments, that I wish only the best for you. You seem like a terrific person. Take care of yourself and don't be afraid of the tears. (((hugs)))
21
Prostitution may not be an appropriate topic for glib smart ass wisecracking.
Many women don't cross back, many are not there by choice, it is usually a really crummy deal for the 'providers', human trafficking (including children) to supply the trade is a horrendous problem.
It usually isn't "Pretty Woman"....
Many women don't cross back, many are not there by choice, it is usually a really crummy deal for the 'providers', human trafficking (including children) to supply the trade is a horrendous problem.
It usually isn't "Pretty Woman"....
22
Kim:
*hugs* My thoughts are with you as well, and ditto on all the comments about how wonderful it always is to have you around here.
Also @1: So yes.
*hugs* My thoughts are with you as well, and ditto on all the comments about how wonderful it always is to have you around here.
Also @1: So yes.
23
xo, to you all. I appreciate all your kind thoughts and wishes. You all are beautiful. Yes, I do feel your kindness.
@ Matt, So sorry to hear about your father-in-law. My heart goes out to you and yours.
@ Matt, So sorry to hear about your father-in-law. My heart goes out to you and yours.
24
Kim, I am sorry for your loss. My thoughts go out to you, and I know only too well what it is like to lose someone who is close to you (after a long illness or suddenly and unexpectedly - I've gone through each).
I hope that you can take comfort that your loved one knew how much you loved and cared for them, and appreciated your love and support during their final moments.
Take care, Kim. You are in our hearts as well.
I hope that you can take comfort that your loved one knew how much you loved and cared for them, and appreciated your love and support during their final moments.
Take care, Kim. You are in our hearts as well.
25
I'm confused about the final question. I read it as "It's okay for people in queer relationships to not conform to heterosexual standards of what a relationship should be, i.e. one sex partner, right Dan?" It's weird that his answer is no.
26
Yeah I don't get it either. Dan usually is against the whole set standards for everyone thing. So he's saying homos need to conform? I'm not going to conform with the rest of them!
27
Dan, the last question- did you really mean yes? I am confused.
And Kim, hugs for you today too. xoxo
And Kim, hugs for you today too. xoxo
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