Some of the questions put to me last night by the students at Florida State University:

How do you prevent the gag reflect during oral?

Is GAY contagious?

What's the strangest thing you've ever heard of getting stuck in a human orifice?

What advice would you give to a woman who's sex life is negatively affected by a past physical and/or emotional trauma?

What are some of the biggest challenges you face raising your son?

What happens if a straight girl falls in love with a gay guy?

Your thoughts on guy-in-girl buttsex are...

Why are we gays so judgmental of each other?

Has Ira Glass ever asked you for sex advice?

I only want to suck/go gay on weed. This has only happened two times in seven years. Ever hear of this?

Chocolate milk?

Some of my answers: firmly grip the back of the head; the Christian right thinks so; Charlie Crist in his wife; get a therapist first, a boyfriend second; now that he has access to the Internet we can't lie to him with impunity (he recently discovered that I'm not a lawyer); nothing; mine are irrelevant, hers are paramount; that has to be the single dumbest question I've ever been asked in life; Ira Glass is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life and he's never asked me for sex advice; no, but let's get stoned after the talk and you can fill me in; please!

Also, happy birthday to Danie B.—"Goddess of the Gays, Nubian Mocha," and the wonderful straight girl/gay ally who heads of the Pride Student Union at Florida State—and a shout out to Sparkles.