Slog
News & ArtsTuesday, January 5, 2010
City Goodbye, Fun Forest! Hello, Possibility!
Posted by K.C. on Tue, Jan 5, 2010 at 10:37 AM
So, now that Seattle Center is neither Fun nor Forested, managers are looking for suggestions on how to fill the newly desolate concrete space until their "Master Plan" is implemented in the future. AHEM. Some suggestions:
• Center for Bear Hair Loss Recovery.
• A SECOND SPACE NEEDLE!
• Elliott Bay Book Co.
• A LESS FUN forest made entirely out of discarded drafts of health care bills.
• Leave it vacant and devoid of all life forms, then dub the space, "Flight to Mars."
• Paul Allen museum containing memorabilia from every one of Paul Allen's 897 multi-million dollar passing-fixations.
• Knoxywood! Miniature theme park centered around Seattle's sexiest convicted murderess, Amanda Knox. Complete with hash bar, do-it-yourself DNA testing kits, and Italian paparazzi!
• A Starbucks within a Starbucks within a Starbucks. Think about it.
• Bad Public Sculpture. Oh. Wait.
You're welcome.
1
I propose a street lined with statues of Paul Allen and Bill Gates, since that's what we're going to get.
Mind you, we Seattle taxpayers will pay for it, not them.
Mind you, we Seattle taxpayers will pay for it, not them.
2
@1
What at Seattle Center was built for Allen or Gates that tax payers paid for?
Nothing.
What is on Seattle Center grounds that was built and paid for by Allen or Gates?
Nothing.
What is on Seattle Center grounds that is for the public and paid for by the public?
Everything.
If you're going to be a whiner, at least whine about something real.
What at Seattle Center was built for Allen or Gates that tax payers paid for?
Nothing.
What is on Seattle Center grounds that was built and paid for by Allen or Gates?
Nothing.
What is on Seattle Center grounds that is for the public and paid for by the public?
Everything.
If you're going to be a whiner, at least whine about something real.
3
@2, you haven't met Will in Seattle before, have you? "Something real" is difficult for him. He's special that way.
I vote Knoxywood. But what we'll get is concrete plaza.
I vote Knoxywood. But what we'll get is concrete plaza.
7
Or Space thimble.
I think the "off site" city council meeting should be held there until it, or they, are replaced.
The "master plan" was talked about as being a ten year plan last year. This year it is talked about as a twenty-year plan.
Btw, David Brewster write a couple of days ago that there might be a levy to vote on in 2012, in time for the 50th anniversary.
I think the "off site" city council meeting should be held there until it, or they, are replaced.
The "master plan" was talked about as being a ten year plan last year. This year it is talked about as a twenty-year plan.
Btw, David Brewster write a couple of days ago that there might be a levy to vote on in 2012, in time for the 50th anniversary.
10
A 20 foot tall space needle that people could take pictures next to all day long. People would eat that up.
11
I vote for a display of a dozen or so soon-to-be-out-of-order touch-screen kiosks displaying earnest, grad-school-narrated video clips of people riding roller coasters.
15
I think this would be a reasonably good site for a Seattle version of Portland's food carts. It's a 10 minute monorail ride from downtown, which would be perfect for the lunch rush. The food court vendors may not love this idea, but increased pedestrian traffic from downtown should help them as well.
16
@15, the food court vendors can suck it, but they've got nothing to worry about. No one from downtown is ever in a million years going to ride the monorail for their lunch hour. Ten minutes, yes, if you can magically teleport yourself from your desk into a departing train, and then do it again on the way back; realistically, from most office towers the round-trip will take the entire hour. No food cart is that good.
The food carts need to be spread all over downtown, filling Occidental Park, lining the street in front of City Hall Park, filling the surface parking lots in Belltown. Every building with a plaza of any kind should be required by law to have a food cart. There should be fifty food carts on the vacant lot that will shortly be taking the place of the giant hole at Second and Pine.
The food carts need to be spread all over downtown, filling Occidental Park, lining the street in front of City Hall Park, filling the surface parking lots in Belltown. Every building with a plaza of any kind should be required by law to have a food cart. There should be fifty food carts on the vacant lot that will shortly be taking the place of the giant hole at Second and Pine.
17
Bring back the Fun Forest, or at least Flight to Mars! They can put it in the EMP building when that organization loses enough money to become a liability.
19
Wow, this iz boring and lame articlezzz.I mean, it's completely not funny. Guest spot from a Weekly intern?
22
Ahem, Don't go dissing Flight To Mars (and anyway, wasn't it Rocket to Mars?). It was a fun ride, that got more fun as more of it broke down. Much more interesting than the EMP.
Ha-RUMPH!
Ha-RUMPH!
23
@16 I often ride Link to the International District for lunch. I'm picturing the Monorail advertising free lunch rides for the first few months to get things started.
25
My childhood would have been very different without the Fun Forest. It used to be really cheap, so for a couple dollars, we could go hang out there all day. When we ran out of quarters for the rides, we used to walk under the Loop-the-Loop or any other ride that went upside down and collect the spare change that had fallen to the ground.
It's been a damned depressing place for the last 20 years or so, though - dingy, antiquated, and staffed by the seriously dysphoric, sitting glumly in the rain, operating rides while listening to suicidal music.
It's been a damned depressing place for the last 20 years or so, though - dingy, antiquated, and staffed by the seriously dysphoric, sitting glumly in the rain, operating rides while listening to suicidal music.
26
I was a patrol in elementary school. The highlight of my year was going on a patrols only field trip to the fun forest in the spring while the rest of my sucker classmates had to stay in Everett and do arithmetic drills.
I also loved that every morning during school I had to arrive 30 mintues early but I got to go to class a half hour late. The majority of that bonus hour was spent drinking unlimited hot chocolate in the patrol's lounge. Haha, what a weird bunch of memories tied to the fun forest.
Also, @22. no it was MOST DEFINITELY "flight to mars" not "rocket to mars"
I also loved that every morning during school I had to arrive 30 mintues early but I got to go to class a half hour late. The majority of that bonus hour was spent drinking unlimited hot chocolate in the patrol's lounge. Haha, what a weird bunch of memories tied to the fun forest.
Also, @22. no it was MOST DEFINITELY "flight to mars" not "rocket to mars"
28
Ok I am super depressed about losing Fun Forest at Seattle Center, but that slog entry was DAMN funny... lol...
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