Slog
News & ArtsMonday, December 28, 2009
Homo It's an Honor Just to be Nominated
Posted by Dan Savage on Mon, Dec 28, 2009 at 11:23 AM
Wow. I don't know what to say. First let me say that it's an honor just to see my name on a list alongside legendary gay rights pioneer Frank Kameny, MSNBC's Rachel Maddow, gay political blogger Timothy "Box Turtle Bulletin" Kincaid, and the one man truth squad that is Wayne "Truth Wins Out" Besen. I'm not worthy. But then to get the longest profile of all of this year's nominees for the annual "Gay Grinch of the Year" award? Complete with "offensive descriptions and web links"? Gee, I don't know what to say. I'm speechless. Thank you, Peter, thank you for this singular honor. You've made my year.
Now I'm not going to ask Slog readers to go and vote for me—not in a field that includes gay luminaries like Maddow and Kameny—but you can vote for Gay Grinch of the Year 2009 by emailing Americans For Truth About Homosexuality. A full list of the nominees can be found here. I don't think I deserve to win but I'll take second or third runner-up. Vote now!
2
It's really not fair to the other nominees that the Americans for Truth folks reference events and accomplishments (Santorum! Doorknob Germgate!) from years prior to 2009. This is supposed to be the Gay Grinch of 2009, not of the entire decade. I call shenanigans on that.
4
This is a great question Dan, "Nevertheless, I have a question for Dan and his domestic homosexual lover Terry: who watches the kid when you guys are having one of your “tightly controlled” three-way sex romps?"
I mean, it's a child. You two are his parents. Don't you have to have 24/7 surveillance to be considered a good parent. Straight parents never leave their kids for a few hours to catch a movie, let alone a weekend away with just the two of them.
Who's watching the kids, Dan? Who?
I mean, it's a child. You two are his parents. Don't you have to have 24/7 surveillance to be considered a good parent. Straight parents never leave their kids for a few hours to catch a movie, let alone a weekend away with just the two of them.
Who's watching the kids, Dan? Who?
5
DAN -- QUIT AVOIDING THE *REAL* ISSUE HERE...
"Nevertheless, I have a question for Dan and his domestic homosexual lover Terry: who watches the kid when you guys are having one of your “tightly controlled” three-way sex romps"
waiting for an answer.... : )
"Nevertheless, I have a question for Dan and his domestic homosexual lover Terry: who watches the kid when you guys are having one of your “tightly controlled” three-way sex romps"
waiting for an answer.... : )
7
That's right Dan, America wants to know: DO YOU LEAVE YOUR CHILD UNATTENDED TO HAVE SEX FOR UPWARDS OF FIFTEEN MINUTES???
9
Just when and how my partner and I have sex with other dudes is a shameful and tightly controlled secret—to say nothing of a very personal matter—that I thought I'd buried forever in the book I wrote about our decision to marry. Dang it! He found us out somehow!
(Babysitters, sleepovers, a weekend at the grandparents.)
(Babysitters, sleepovers, a weekend at the grandparents.)
12
I suppose we can assume Peter hires a babysitter when he's having sex in the other room. If not, that means he either leaves his children unattended, does not have sex, or actually keeps his children in the room during his monogamous, non-kinky, and god-blessed sex romps with his wife.
I suppose we should be asking Mr. LaBarbera the same question.
I guess they could have a nanny-cam in the other room, and he and his wife keep their eyes locked on the monitor, but that would require strange contortions, or an unholy doggy-style position. So Mr. LaBarbera, which is it? What do/did you do during sex to ensure that your child/children were safe?
I suppose we should be asking Mr. LaBarbera the same question.
I guess they could have a nanny-cam in the other room, and he and his wife keep their eyes locked on the monitor, but that would require strange contortions, or an unholy doggy-style position. So Mr. LaBarbera, which is it? What do/did you do during sex to ensure that your child/children were safe?
13
@9: Tsk tsk tsk, lying papist. You know you send him to be indoctrinated in the ways of catholic dogma. Why, I bet he worships the moon goddess, oops, I mean the perverted version of Jesus' mother that you papists love to worship.
Shame.
Shame.
16
More importantly, who cleans the mouse after Enigma skritches one out to his favorite diaper porn site -- or does it not matter because no other human has ever been in his Kent apartment?
On average, gays are better parents than straights.
On average, gays are better parents than straights.
17
@15, yes, it's true. Those burns are from when he failed to fill out the 1870 census citations correctly like I told him.
18
You know very well I'm a female, Fnarf. And I am a proud Hill denzien.
I will not comment on the porn.
I will not comment on the porn.
20
mazel tov on the achievement, dan! speaking of, i like how he throws in a little yiddish - "chutzpah"? very cosmopolitan, peter. you should send him a formal thank-you note, seeing as how he linked to your column *multiple* times.
21
LOOK..@ 11 !!
a gay kwanzaa card !.. you should sell those lc ..you'll get filthy rich..or something...
a gay kwanzaa card !.. you should sell those lc ..you'll get filthy rich..or something...
23
I love how they use one of Dan's most convincing and sane videos to "prove" their point that he is dubious and crazy.
24
@7 Cuddlin's fer women an' lib'rals!
@23 When a group of lunatics watches a sane person speak, he looks downright crazy to them.
@23 When a group of lunatics watches a sane person speak, he looks downright crazy to them.
25
My letter to them:
I vote for my brother, Dan. He sooooooo hates Christmas. And his heart is sooooooo small. He even has a little dog! And he lets this dog chew up the family heirloom creche he stole from his devout siblings. Evil evil man.
--
I vote for my brother, Dan. He sooooooo hates Christmas. And his heart is sooooooo small. He even has a little dog! And he lets this dog chew up the family heirloom creche he stole from his devout siblings. Evil evil man.
--
26
Man I must have missed all the studies and scientific research about the links between parental sex toy use and miserable, abused children
27
A dozen first-person references in just two paragraphs. Dan, isn't that excessive on the hubris meter even by your standards?
A dozen first-person references in just two paragraphs. Dan, isn't that excessive on the hubris meter even by your standards?
29
Enigma, I apologize for irony fail, recognition fail, and for mistaking you for John Bailo. Inexcusable. Stamp on my foot at the next Slog Happy, if you want.
30
Wouldn't you just love to know just how big the uptick will be in return traffic to SavageLove @ the Stranger.com will be after all those backdoor sex-curious xtians click on the link in Peter LaBarbera's article?
31
Whatever happened to Newt Gay Grinch?
'Only a perversion activist as twisted as Savage could stage a contest with his readers to come up with a sickening definition to associate with “santorum” '
I would not, could not, in a box.
I could not, would not, with a fox.
I will not eat it with a mouse.
I will not eat it in a house.
I will not eat it here or there.
I will not eat it anywhere.
I do not eat green santorum.
I do not like it, Dan-I-um.
'Only a perversion activist as twisted as Savage could stage a contest with his readers to come up with a sickening definition to associate with “santorum” '
I would not, could not, in a box.
I could not, would not, with a fox.
I will not eat it with a mouse.
I will not eat it in a house.
I will not eat it here or there.
I will not eat it anywhere.
I do not eat green santorum.
I do not like it, Dan-I-um.
32
@9: Funny that the answer "(Babysitters, sleepovers, a weekend at the grandparents.)", was also 'hidden' in that book and in your column.
Odd isn't it how they have no problem finding the bits they want to highlight while ignoring the many, many references to what can only be called "good parenting skills."
Keep up the good work, Dan. If you're pissing off people like that, then you're clearly doing something right.
34
@12....isn't LaBarbera one of those "ex-gays"? If so, then I think the obvious answer is that he doesn't have sex at all. "I'm sorry baby...you know I want to have sex with you, and that I totally don't want to have sex with some guy's big, hard, long....um....what was I saying? Anyway, it's just that we can't leave our kids alone for one moment. Not one." "But, honey, the kids are at preschool." "But they could call us with a problem at any time! We can't let up our guard for one moment!" "But..." "Not one moment. Maybe after they're all married."
35
Dan, I admire and respect you and truly believe you deserve your place alongside Ms. Maddow, but I also believe that when push comes to shove I would have the final honor bestowed on Rachel. I just fucking love that woman so much.
38
1)I like the phrase "overactive behind" in Dan's profile...it sounds like he needs an Immodium.
2)Why would gay parents be any different from straight parents when it comes to scheduling "sexy times"? You wait until the kid is asleep, or if you're kinky or noisy or just like fucking in the kitchen, you schedule your sexventures when the kid is at school/at grandma's/on a sleepover.
2)Why would gay parents be any different from straight parents when it comes to scheduling "sexy times"? You wait until the kid is asleep, or if you're kinky or noisy or just like fucking in the kitchen, you schedule your sexventures when the kid is at school/at grandma's/on a sleepover.
39
"Gay Grinch" is one of the dumbest damn things I've ever heard of. What emotion do they hope to produce? I can only summon mild condescension.
Who watches The Kid when you have sex? Dear lord... When I was The Kid's age I'd be watching* my little brother for several hours a day. Not to long ago The Kid would have been considered old enough to pull shifts at a factory. What the hell is up this guy's ass?
*He's two years younger than me, he basically took care of himself. There was food in the fridge, the number for the ambulance was next to the phone.
Who watches The Kid when you have sex? Dear lord... When I was The Kid's age I'd be watching* my little brother for several hours a day. Not to long ago The Kid would have been considered old enough to pull shifts at a factory. What the hell is up this guy's ass?
*He's two years younger than me, he basically took care of himself. There was food in the fridge, the number for the ambulance was next to the phone.
40
Here's my letter:
I really want to vote for Ms. Maddow, but in an effort to be more compassionate I'm going to vote for Mr. Savage. I read your poorly disguised attempt to deflect attention away from your man crush and it saddened me. I can't blame you, Mr. Savage is indeed witty and his dimpled chin is most charming. Sorry, he's taken. Chin up, sir there are more fish in the sea.
--
I really want to vote for Ms. Maddow, but in an effort to be more compassionate I'm going to vote for Mr. Savage. I read your poorly disguised attempt to deflect attention away from your man crush and it saddened me. I can't blame you, Mr. Savage is indeed witty and his dimpled chin is most charming. Sorry, he's taken. Chin up, sir there are more fish in the sea.
--
41
Whoa. Never seen that website before. There are some sick shits out there. That dude needs some serious medication - so much that it might just be cheaper for him to buy his own pharmacy.
42
Gah. Screw you Dan, for making me go to that website where I saw their delightful article on the lesbian girl who shot another girl, thereby proving that gayness causes murder.
Using a murdered girl to demonize a disenfranchized group of people and further your bigoted political agenda isn't really surprising, but to see it still makes me a little sick to my stomach.
Using a murdered girl to demonize a disenfranchized group of people and further your bigoted political agenda isn't really surprising, but to see it still makes me a little sick to my stomach.
43
Dan IS a gay grinch. He's spent the last 3 weeks ridiculing any vaguely sentimental aspect of Christmas. (But you still bought stuff for DJ, right? Way to teach him that materialism is everything.) I guess there is a war on Christmas, with Dan as the lone warrior.
Assholes. Both LaBarbera AND Savage.
Assholes. Both LaBarbera AND Savage.
44
I can't get over their claim that we helped kill Collette. Would they blame the heterosexual agenda for the hypothetical murder of a girl who spurned the love of a drooling boy?
46
@40
Very sensitive letter.
An uncanny degree of empathy and understanding for an unrequited Dan-crush.
Very sensitive letter.
An uncanny degree of empathy and understanding for an unrequited Dan-crush.
47
I voted for Dan, mostly because I know very little about the other nominees.
Here's my letter:
Dear Americans for Truth,
I feel compelled to vote for the Gay Grinch of the Year award for many reasons. The ones that I'm sure will appeal the most to you are the ones against your strict Christian beliefs.
I really do feel that Dan Savage is the biggest Gay Grinch of 2009! Why, you ask? He's done so many things to lead me to deviant sex. He's inspired me to accept that I am bisexual, experiment with anal play, try non-monogamy, and integrate his definition of "santorum" into my vocabulary. He's also helped me to see the err in Christian ways and accept that there is no Jesus Christ.
If he can do all of this.. he is obviously the biggest gay grinch of 2009.
Thanks!
Best of luck, Dan! :)
Here's my letter:
Dear Americans for Truth,
I feel compelled to vote for the Gay Grinch of the Year award for many reasons. The ones that I'm sure will appeal the most to you are the ones against your strict Christian beliefs.
I really do feel that Dan Savage is the biggest Gay Grinch of 2009! Why, you ask? He's done so many things to lead me to deviant sex. He's inspired me to accept that I am bisexual, experiment with anal play, try non-monogamy, and integrate his definition of "santorum" into my vocabulary. He's also helped me to see the err in Christian ways and accept that there is no Jesus Christ.
If he can do all of this.. he is obviously the biggest gay grinch of 2009.
Thanks!
Best of luck, Dan! :)
48
@43: Links? Cites? When did I ridicule Christmas? I lurv Christmas and spent a week baking my mother's Christmas cookies in the run up to Christmas Eve and Xmess Day. What are you talking about?
49
Nope. Sorry @ 46, I don't have a crush on Danny boy. I've got a crush all right, but he doesn't live in Washington and he has a thing for the feminine form. Two things that disqualify Dan. Nice try. Thanks for thinking of me and my happiness, you sweet thing.
Happy 2010!
Happy 2010!
55
Why Dan I had no idea you were an anti-Christian activist, deviant sex advice columnist, AND prolific hatemonger. That's my kind of man!
57
Yes, yes, Loveschild, your lack of reading comprehension knows no bounds, you need not prove it to us everyday.
Garrison Keillor is the originator of describing Christmas carols as Jewish drecks: http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive…, but you couldn't be bothered to understand the post you mis-commented on. Nope, your desire to slam another person makes you desperate to claim things out of context.
You have no moral high horse to stand on. You who support the murder of people based purely on their sexual orientation, because a sovereign nation says so: http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive… & http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive….
Garrison Keillor is the originator of describing Christmas carols as Jewish drecks: http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive…, but you couldn't be bothered to understand the post you mis-commented on. Nope, your desire to slam another person makes you desperate to claim things out of context.
You have no moral high horse to stand on. You who support the murder of people based purely on their sexual orientation, because a sovereign nation says so: http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive… & http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archive….
58
As a young boy Peter watched in horror as his great Aunt Anita Bryant had a pie thrown in her face, a very mean act indeed. Since that fateful day Peter has had recurring night sweats about being impaled on some bad homo's boner...
Juuussssst kidding. I'm being facetious.
Pee-tah has known for years that he's too fugly for bad boys and that trump doo has always been a bone killer.
Juuussssst kidding. I'm being facetious.
Pee-tah has known for years that he's too fugly for bad boys and that trump doo has always been a bone killer.
59
LC's old house fell in on her and this new one is about to go up in flames. Not surprising really when the foundation is hateful bigotry laced with a bond of hypocrisy.
You could learn a lot from practicing Kwanzaa but we know that will never happen.
You could learn a lot from practicing Kwanzaa but we know that will never happen.
60
I wrote a nice letter to the haters. Told them they weren't acting very Christ-like with all their negativity. I told them you were nicer.
62
Um, is there any prize that comes with this honor? Does the winner get a nice plastic trophy or dildo or plaque to hang on a wall?
63
@62 You know good ol' Peter is just salivating at the idea of putting together a bunch of dildo trophies to give out. Anything to justify handling some penis- even artificial.
64
Dan--I hate to say this but John Aravosis of Americablog would be MY vote for Gay Grinch of the Year. To me, you can only belong to one list--the list of dudes I pine for.
65
I just gave the website a quick overview. Why is it I hear more about homosexual (and straight) sexual practices from anti-gay sites like this one, than from general information pro-same sex marriage sites?
They even post photos of nude folks (with little censor blocks) at an S and M site. You can't tell me these people aren't just a little more obsessed with homosexuality and "sexual perversions" than than regular folks. Did you know Alfred Kinsey inserted objects into his penis? Well, now I do. Thanks anti-gay site that can't stand to look, see, read, or hear about non-vanilla sexual practices! If I'm ever curious about hard core sex practices, I'll know just who to turn to!
Really, for people who claim to be averse to sex outside of their limited Christian parameters (whatever that may be), they sure seem to have no problem reading and posting everything they can about it.
They even post photos of nude folks (with little censor blocks) at an S and M site. You can't tell me these people aren't just a little more obsessed with homosexuality and "sexual perversions" than than regular folks. Did you know Alfred Kinsey inserted objects into his penis? Well, now I do. Thanks anti-gay site that can't stand to look, see, read, or hear about non-vanilla sexual practices! If I'm ever curious about hard core sex practices, I'll know just who to turn to!
Really, for people who claim to be averse to sex outside of their limited Christian parameters (whatever that may be), they sure seem to have no problem reading and posting everything they can about it.
66
Pie throwing is mean? Goodness gracious. My word, what is the world coming to? Mommy, Mommeeeeey! They're calling names!
Dan goes over the top sometimes, if the germ thing is real, that was petty.
I'm sorry the girl was killed over unrequited love, but the crazier of us heteros do that all the time; and I don't think it's due to sexual orientation, more to possesiveness. And the number of gay/transexual/crossdressing people killed due to the lack of tolerance preached by some Christians is far greater. It's a sad world many times. I wish I could cure homicide.
The only thing that struck me as truly beyond the bounds, was the person who insinuated that an anti-gay bigot was also anti-Semetic when they weren't. That's wrong.
Dan goes over the top sometimes, if the germ thing is real, that was petty.
I'm sorry the girl was killed over unrequited love, but the crazier of us heteros do that all the time; and I don't think it's due to sexual orientation, more to possesiveness. And the number of gay/transexual/crossdressing people killed due to the lack of tolerance preached by some Christians is far greater. It's a sad world many times. I wish I could cure homicide.
The only thing that struck me as truly beyond the bounds, was the person who insinuated that an anti-gay bigot was also anti-Semetic when they weren't. That's wrong.
67
"Though I am very tempted to vote for the lovely Rachel Maddow, I must cast my vote for Dan Savage. He reaches so many people, young and old alike, and over the past 10 years his advice column has helped me through some tough decisions in my life. 2009 was no exception. Thanks, Dan, for all that you do! Thanks for being a flaming beacon of light!
Thanks, AmericansForTruth, for honoring these courageous and outspoken champions. You make me wish I were gay."
Thanks, AmericansForTruth, for honoring these courageous and outspoken champions. You make me wish I were gay."
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