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News & ArtsSaturday, December 12, 2009
City Today in Service Animals
Posted by Dan Savage on Sat, Dec 12, 2009 at 12:30 PM
"Yes," writes Slog tipper Fukov Daly, "thats a fucking pigeon on her head. On the fucking bus."
1
OMG I was on the bus with her last night! Every time the bus turned a corner, the bird would flap its wings to stabilize itself. TOO BIZARRE.
3
"There's a pigeon on your head! You've got head pigeons! Get to the nurse before they spread to the other children!"
8
What? You think she's going to let a Golden Retriever sit on her head? A monkey would rip her face off. I think she's made a wise choice for head sitting service animal.
9
I had a conversation with her at a gas station in Interbay about a month ago, she found the pigeon as a baby that had fallen out of its nest and he's been with her ever since. Then she asked me to buy her a Rainier tallboy.
10
Where can I find a doctor to sign the documents giving me the right to a service animal of my choosing and the right to smoke medical marijuana? My bus rides have gotten boring.
14
Hope she's never on the same bus as one of those crustpunks with a kitten on the shoulder.
Also, Invader Zim reference FTW.
Also, Invader Zim reference FTW.
19
I wonder if she hangs out with the bird lady from western avenue - the one that usually has a seagull under her coat
21
"Excuse me Ma'am, you have a pigeon on your head."
"Sorry. What did you say?"
"I said, 'you have a pigeon on your head.'"
"What?"
"A pigeon! A pigeon is sitting on top of your head!"
"Sorry, I can't hear you. I have a pigeon on my head."
-Based on a skit originally performed by Bert and Ernie, circa 1972.
"Sorry. What did you say?"
"I said, 'you have a pigeon on your head.'"
"What?"
"A pigeon! A pigeon is sitting on top of your head!"
"Sorry, I can't hear you. I have a pigeon on my head."
-Based on a skit originally performed by Bert and Ernie, circa 1972.
22
Pigeonhead Lady is a regular at Pike Place Market. Several things about her:
She's really nice, at least to those of us who work at the Market.
The pigeon is tied on. It's spirit is completely broken.
She never wears shoes. No, not even yesterday.
Before the pigeon, she had a rooster that lived in her coat.
She's really nice, at least to those of us who work at the Market.
The pigeon is tied on. It's spirit is completely broken.
She never wears shoes. No, not even yesterday.
Before the pigeon, she had a rooster that lived in her coat.
23
she also has created this amazing vehicle that consists of an old ladies grocery cart attached to the front of a razor scooter. its fucking brilliant and i also have never seen her in shoes...
26
Pigeon Lady @ the doctor's office-- Doctor: "So, how long have you had that?"
Pigeon: "Well it started out as a wart on my ass a couple years ago and it just kept getting bigger."
Pigeon: "Well it started out as a wart on my ass a couple years ago and it just kept getting bigger."
28
My friend and I took the 36 up to the Malay Satay Hut for lunch yesterday.
Question: Is the average age in the I.D. like 80?
My friend and I took the 36 up to the Malay Satay Hut for lunch yesterday.
Question: Is the average age in the I.D. like 80?
29
Sorry, @27, the wingers have put the kibosh on Seattle's free syringe pigeon programs - despite all the empirical evidence.
32
Well, after all, IT IS Seattle. So who gives a rosy fuck?
Some of you need to get in touch. Or, move to Garfied County.
Love this lady, her life, her world, her city.
You bet. And Dan, consider what the triple bird does for anal sex ... just consider.
Fanarf, get some help. You are cascading into the pit. Maybe, better drugs. Maybes less booze, maybe more jizz in your right hand. You need something these days.
Holidays blues? Buy some toys for poor kids - will pep you up.
Some of you need to get in touch. Or, move to Garfied County.
Love this lady, her life, her world, her city.
You bet. And Dan, consider what the triple bird does for anal sex ... just consider.
Fanarf, get some help. You are cascading into the pit. Maybe, better drugs. Maybes less booze, maybe more jizz in your right hand. You need something these days.
Holidays blues? Buy some toys for poor kids - will pep you up.
33
Totally makes me think of a book called "The Mount" where humans are slaves to alien overlords whose legs fit perfectly around our necks. Humans with little aliens riding on their heads like horses. Or like Pigeonhead lady.
34
i know what fanarF might pep him up. Montana against Appalacian State. Best american football game of the year. Fans are going apeshit in the Missoula snowfall.
36
Well there you go. In 45 years, I have never once seen a woman with a pigeon on her head.
Now I have.
Now I have.
39
I love the beautiful pigeon lady. She and her bird bring fun to strangers on the bus, or at least gets them out of their vanilla lives for a second. Some appreciate the homoavian partnership and the rest get something new to bitch about. The lady rescued the bird and loves the bird; the bird is her friend and what’s wrong with that - we all need a little help from our friends.
40
I keep going back to what @22 said
"Its spirit is completely broken"
I have no trouble with her being eccentric and her having a pigeon...except for that bit. That just makes me sad. I hope it's not true.
"Its spirit is completely broken"
I have no trouble with her being eccentric and her having a pigeon...except for that bit. That just makes me sad. I hope it's not true.
42
Please tell me she doesn't really tie it to her head. If that's true, somebody should call the police- that's abuse. Even if it's just a stupid pigeon.
43
All jokes aside pigeons have been proven to be valuable service animals for those with special needs. They can sense when one is about to have a sane thought and alert them by shitting on their head.
44
You know what is even weirder? This is not the first time I've seen someone with a pigeon on their head ... one time when I visited California, I saw a homeless man that had a pigeon on his head. He didn't train it or anything, and the only reason the pigeon stayed is because he tied a rope around its leg. Maybe it is becoming a trend.
He was also attempting to sell people plastic bags.
He was also attempting to sell people plastic bags.
45
Years ago I was at a wedding in the Pacific, and this woman had this rather amazing brooch on her coat in the shape of a small, colorful bird.
Turns out it was, in fact, a small colorful bird. Had a little string from one of it's legs to a safety pin on her coat.
From memory, I believe it also turned out that it's wings were clipped.
...I still wonder what the procedure was when the bird needed to poop.
The pigeon being tied to the lady would be sad. But, I'm not sure it's really that different from someone keeping a bird in a birdcage. At least the pigeon gets to see a lot of stuff.
Turns out it was, in fact, a small colorful bird. Had a little string from one of it's legs to a safety pin on her coat.
From memory, I believe it also turned out that it's wings were clipped.
...I still wonder what the procedure was when the bird needed to poop.
The pigeon being tied to the lady would be sad. But, I'm not sure it's really that different from someone keeping a bird in a birdcage. At least the pigeon gets to see a lot of stuff.
49
@43"All jokes aside pigeons have been proven to be valuable service animals for those with special needs. They can sense when one is about to have a sane thought and alert them by shitting on their head."
this seriously bears repeating. thank you!
this seriously bears repeating. thank you!
50
Well, as long as they just let it *ride* the bus, that's OK. But whatever you do, DON'T LET THE PIGEON DRIVE THE BUS!
51
...she's got headphones on ?.. she's listening to music ?.i'd give five whole dollars to know what she's listening to on her i-whatevers...
53
@ 40, 42, et al:
Yes, it really is tied to her head most of the time. She's super sweet and rational when you talk to her, but the poor bird looks ill and mangy and I'm sorry for it. It's a dysfunctional relationship at best. There have been some kind souls down at the Market who have asked security if they can do anything for the bird, but I guess not. She's probably a little mentally ill, we get a lot of those down there, but she's harmless-to-lovely regarding people and other animals.
My boss tells a story of seeing Pigeonhead Lady manhandle the rooster (back in the Rooster-in-the-coat Lady days) by vigorously whirling it in a circle around her head, which would make it pass out and then she would stick it back in her coat. She (my boss) asked the same thing: is it abuse? Can we do anything about it? Apparently she couldn't then. Now she's a Market fixture, and no one asks any more.
Pike Place Market is a mad microcosm that makes the crazy crazier. Just sayin'.
Yes, it really is tied to her head most of the time. She's super sweet and rational when you talk to her, but the poor bird looks ill and mangy and I'm sorry for it. It's a dysfunctional relationship at best. There have been some kind souls down at the Market who have asked security if they can do anything for the bird, but I guess not. She's probably a little mentally ill, we get a lot of those down there, but she's harmless-to-lovely regarding people and other animals.
My boss tells a story of seeing Pigeonhead Lady manhandle the rooster (back in the Rooster-in-the-coat Lady days) by vigorously whirling it in a circle around her head, which would make it pass out and then she would stick it back in her coat. She (my boss) asked the same thing: is it abuse? Can we do anything about it? Apparently she couldn't then. Now she's a Market fixture, and no one asks any more.
Pike Place Market is a mad microcosm that makes the crazy crazier. Just sayin'.
57
I want to see a guy with a hooded "service falcon" perched on his forearm get on that bus, then take the falcon's hood off - Zap! Pigeon feathers everywhere!
58
Is it legal to kill pigeons in seattle? If so someone should kill that bird. Namely anyone who believes that any animal besides a guide dog can be a service animal because it is people like this that will get service animals reclassified to exclude everything but a german shepard tethered to a sightless human.
60
One day,
I leaned over and whispered:
" Psst. Yo, goodfeathers, you got a human stuck to your foot."
The human wasn't amused, but I'm fairly sure the bird was.
Can't wait for the big tamborine solo. Dat Pigeon rocks out.
@9 Don't joke, that bird can drink you under the table.
@32 fnarf is clearly left handed.
I leaned over and whispered:
" Psst. Yo, goodfeathers, you got a human stuck to your foot."
The human wasn't amused, but I'm fairly sure the bird was.
Can't wait for the big tamborine solo. Dat Pigeon rocks out.
@9 Don't joke, that bird can drink you under the table.
@32 fnarf is clearly left handed.
61
I think she and the guy who screams about "Seattle Police Are Communist" with his royal scepter down by Pacific Place should get together. They'd make a darling couple.
62
@18 There are plenty of people who appear normal over the course of several viewings on the bus, although they do tend to congregate on the same routes and times.
No, if we're looking for some deep insight for this to illuminate, I think it is proof that Bellevue would benefit greatly if it had some homeless shelters and methadone clinics.
No, if we're looking for some deep insight for this to illuminate, I think it is proof that Bellevue would benefit greatly if it had some homeless shelters and methadone clinics.
63
@EVERYONE BITCHING ABOUT "SERVICE ANIMALS"- The problem is that the bus drivers don't enforce the rules. Small animals are supposed to be caged, large dogs are supposed to pay regular fare and sit on the ground. Service animals ride free. (http://metro.kingcounty.gov/tops/bus/far…)
There's no rule against animals on the bus, but nobody does it right.
There's no rule against animals on the bus, but nobody does it right.
65
I'm quite sick of "service" animals who service seems to be ... ummm.. just being there for selfish pricks who have no regard for their fellow human beings. Human beings who are trying to ride public transport, or eat in a restaurant, or just fucking shop for groceries without getting my crotch licked.
67
yeah, NON-SERVICE ANIMALS ARE ALLOWED ON BUSES in Seattle. Pet dogs are allowed on all the time.
The pigeon doesn't have to be a service animal to be allowed on the bus folks.
The pigeon doesn't have to be a service animal to be allowed on the bus folks.
68
Wow, I'm sorry that this woman's obvious mental illness was so inconvenient to so many people. Maybe it might be time to practice that "compassionate enlightened west coast spirit" I'm sure you take credit for. Are you so disconnected from your community that you would take this woman's picture and post it to bitch about service animals rather than realize that this "inconvenience" is a suffering human being. I hope you got some laughs for it.
Douche.
Douche.
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