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News & ArtsThursday, December 3, 2009
Books / Retail Is Your Store CHRISTmas-Friendly?
Posted by Paul Constant on Thu, Dec 3, 2009 at 3:55 PM
Iworkatborders alerted me to this website: Stand for Christmas. It's a website for and by Christians (the most beleaguered minority in America™) about stores that do not properly honor the Christ in Christmas. Here, for instance, is the rating for Borders:
Customer Ratings SummaryNumber of Ratings13
Christmas-Friendly8%
Christmas-Negligent38%
Christmas-Offensive54%
And here are a couple of unhappy Christian reviews:
Comment Date: Dec 1 2009 7:56 PM
Rating: Christmas-Negligent
Comment: I tried to find a children's book about the birth of Christ and could not find any. They had a Christmas display table but it was all about santa!
[...]
Comment Date: Nov 27 2009 6:31 PM
Rating: Christmas-Negligent
Comment: We saw "Holiday" trees, "Holiday" this & "Holiday that, but the ONLY mention of "Christmas" was on 2 of their gift cards. Very disappointing!Comment Date: Nov 25 2009 12:41 PM
Rating: Christmas-Offensive
Comment: They sure do have a lot of titles with "Christmas" in them, but they are accompanied by cursing or other inappropriate words. Absent in the store in totality is any mention of Christmas. Lots of "Christmas alternative" holiday items also. Ugh.
Also offensive? The Gap:
Comment Date: Dec 1 2009 11:41 AM
Rating: Christmas-Offensive
Comment: First thing I notice is that they are only playing non-Christian Christmas songs (Jingle Bells, etc.). Unacceptable. I ask a clerk, "What is the reason for the season?" and I get back "What?". I buy a shirt and when they ask me what kind of wrapping paper, I reply that I want nativity paper or something showing the baby Jesus. They say they only have snowflakes and snowmen and green/red paper. What does green and red have to do with JESUS?
And Best Buy, which recently published a flier wishing people a "Happy Eid al-Adha," is the Great Retail Satan.
Comment Date: Nov 29 2009 5:04 PM
Rating: Christmas-Offensive
Comment: Just bought an ipod from Best Buy, but then learned of their anti-Christmas/pro -Eid al Adha actions. I so regret having purchased from them. Best Buy, give glory to the one who has allowed and attributed to your success...Jesus Christ, not Mohammed!
I am completely addicted to this website.
1
Oh the beautiful irony of this comment about Eddi Bauer:
"Shopping CHRISTmas friendly stores is very important to me. I do not believe that CHRISTmas advertising should begin until after Thanksgiving. The day to celebrate the birth of Jesus has become far more too materialistic, and seems to become that way more each. year. Loacally the CHRISTmas decorations, songs, etc. began before holloween. Absurd and disgusting. "
"Shopping CHRISTmas friendly stores is very important to me. I do not believe that CHRISTmas advertising should begin until after Thanksgiving. The day to celebrate the birth of Jesus has become far more too materialistic, and seems to become that way more each. year. Loacally the CHRISTmas decorations, songs, etc. began before holloween. Absurd and disgusting. "
2
What would Jesus say?
Seriously. Just, briefly, imagine if Jeshua of Nazareth were dropped into a Borders bookstore in the year 2009.
What would he say?
I imagine he'd scream a lot. Nobody would understand him because he'd be screaming in Aramaic or something... then he'd get carted off by the police, investigated by Homeland Security, and locked up somewhere... cuz, you know, Jesus totally looked like the modern stereotype of a Middle Eastern terrorist.
Seriously. Just, briefly, imagine if Jeshua of Nazareth were dropped into a Borders bookstore in the year 2009.
What would he say?
I imagine he'd scream a lot. Nobody would understand him because he'd be screaming in Aramaic or something... then he'd get carted off by the police, investigated by Homeland Security, and locked up somewhere... cuz, you know, Jesus totally looked like the modern stereotype of a Middle Eastern terrorist.
3
"What does green and red have to do with JESUS?"
Well, what does buying a shirt as a gift have to do with him? Seems to me if you're going to piss on one secular element of the holiday, you should piss on all of them. Which would mean no pressies for you and yours, Believer!
Well, what does buying a shirt as a gift have to do with him? Seems to me if you're going to piss on one secular element of the holiday, you should piss on all of them. Which would mean no pressies for you and yours, Believer!
4
I feel so sorry for people who work retail.
You should've gotten back a swift kick to the ass. Be grateful you only got "What?"
I ask a clerk, "What is the reason for the season?" and I get back "What?".
You should've gotten back a swift kick to the ass. Be grateful you only got "What?"
6
As I learned from my subscription to the horrifying AFA e-mail list, their boycott of the Gap has been suspended due to a new Gap ad that apparently sucks CHRISTmas's dick in a big way. So, yay?
7
I can't believe that during my deeply spiritual quest to buy discounted t-shirts from India and Chinese consumer electronics—all in the name of our Savior Lord Jesus Christ—these retail outlets were not emphasizing their relationship with God.
9
I am seriously offended by the lack of Saturnalia observance. I mean, Saturn's only in charge of the FUCKING HARVEST. He made it possible for you stuff your ungrateful faces.
Fucking knaves.
Fucking knaves.
11
I would say that if the Christians were allowed to appropriate Saturnalia or some such from the heathens it is only fair that the heathens be allowed to appropriate it back.
13
Wow, I actually found one reasonable response on the Best Buy page: "Um, perhaps Best Buy dropped the ball with Thanksgiving, but don't they still have 23 more days to acknowledge Christmas? Until then, I'm going to chill."
Of course, this person still rated BB 'Christmas-Negligent'.
Of course, this person still rated BB 'Christmas-Negligent'.
14
I'm with @7. Imagine, the horror of these commercialized RETAIL STORES.
I love it when illiterate stupes use big ol' words like "attributed" without having a clue what they mean or how they are used. Jesus attributed to your success, indeed.
I love it when illiterate stupes use big ol' words like "attributed" without having a clue what they mean or how they are used. Jesus attributed to your success, indeed.
15
Comment Date: Nov 29 2009 12:43 PM
Rating: Christmas-Negligent
Comment: 11/29 Ad: "Every Season starts at Dick's" That's all: no Holiday, no Christmas. no Dick's.
Rating: Christmas-Negligent
Comment: 11/29 Ad: "Every Season starts at Dick's" That's all: no Holiday, no Christmas. no Dick's.
16
I'm having issues with the first thing on their About Us page.
Jesus Christ has been the reason for the season for millenia.
No matter what, Jesus has only been dead for less than 2 millenia, therefore, no. There is no way this can be possible. Christians did not celebrate the birth of Jesus of Nazareth on roughly that date until 200AD. So, WTF Christians? Facts are important. At least sometimes, right?
Jesus Christ has been the reason for the season for millenia.
No matter what, Jesus has only been dead for less than 2 millenia, therefore, no. There is no way this can be possible. Christians did not celebrate the birth of Jesus of Nazareth on roughly that date until 200AD. So, WTF Christians? Facts are important. At least sometimes, right?
17
Oh, and by the way, if someone wished me a "Happy Eid al-Adha," I'd probably punch them in the mouth.
18
I find it utterly offensive that you and your store are not commercializing the birth of my persieved lord and savior. Why are you not showering others with my religious beliefs?
19
I think Best Buy sent that "Happy Eid al-Adha" flyer on the very days of the actual Eid al-Adha holiday itself. Also, it's supposed to be a holiday in remembrance of Abraham offering to sacrifice Isaac to god... so like, it's part of christian stuff too.
I don't think I dislike these idiot protesters because they're christian, I think I dislike them because they're stupid.
I don't think I dislike these idiot protesters because they're christian, I think I dislike them because they're stupid.
21
My policy of shopping at each of these stores to spite these fuckwits is going to rapidly bankrupt me. Going to have to stop paying attention now.
23
Because ripping up an image of Christ and throwing it in the trash isn't "offensive"?
WHY would you want any religious icon, symbol etc on wrapping paper?
Use your head Christians!
WHY would you want any religious icon, symbol etc on wrapping paper?
Use your head Christians!
24
@17, fuck you. You're a racist and a bigot, and I'm calling you on it. The average Muslim is, in fact, a better person than you are, whatever your and our other differences are.
26
Right. Because Islam is such a "peaceful" religion, right, Fnarf? If you agree with that, it only proves you don't have a fucking clue what you're talking about.
27
To honor Christ I always buy some Christmas ham and shrimp and wrap it with a nice holly sprig and seal it with candle wax, just like my Celtic and Germanic ancestors they stole all that from.
Then, because Christ was a good Jewish married man, I have a little wine with my ham.
Then, because Christ was a good Jewish married man, I have a little wine with my ham.
28
You know, I bet Jesus himself had opinions about the best ways to spend your time and money, how to treat other people, whether to make a big deal in public about how righteous you are, stuff like that. If only someone had recorded them for posterity, so that earnest seekers after truth such as these could read them. Alas.
30
Well, exactly...early Christianity stole EVERYTHING from every other religion...very little of the trappings of Christianity is original...they just ripped off the Jews and the Romans and the Etruscans and the Greeks and everybody else within earshot.
31
It's a double whammy: my head wants to explode, but it's also so wonderfully entertaining.
This one--about Nordstroms--made me goggle: "It was November 28th when I shopped. The cashier didn't wish me a happy anything, but when I wished her "Merry Christmas", she wished me a "Merry Christmas" as well."
WHY ARE YOU WISHING PEOPLE MERRY CHRISTMAS IN NOVEMBER?
This one--about Nordstroms--made me goggle: "It was November 28th when I shopped. The cashier didn't wish me a happy anything, but when I wished her "Merry Christmas", she wished me a "Merry Christmas" as well."
WHY ARE YOU WISHING PEOPLE MERRY CHRISTMAS IN NOVEMBER?
32
This is my new favorite website. Bass Pro Shop got a pretty high rating I see. But I don't know how offended people could get by a fishing supply store not providing christian inspired merchandise.
33
I find it really amusing that K-mart of all places has an 87% friendly rating. When I was a small evangelical christian child K-mart was evil, because they owned Walden books, which...I don't actually know, something about porn that was only ever alluded to. But we never, ever shopped in K-mart; one the only AFA boycott calls we adhered to that strictly. But times change, and now K-mart is good and Gap is evil. There's not a lot of rhyme or reason.
34
@26 - Actually, some variations are. Sufism, for example, is known as a particularly non-violent Islamic sub-religion.
35
Thanks to everyone on this thread. I haven't laughed so hard reading comments in ages. Special props to @2, @4, and @28.
38
@16,
Not only that, but it's guaranteed that Christmas didn't become associated with the "season" until Christianity made inroads into Northern Europe. That would be relatively late in the first millennium AD.
Not only that, but it's guaranteed that Christmas didn't become associated with the "season" until Christianity made inroads into Northern Europe. That would be relatively late in the first millennium AD.
39
"it's CHRISTmas not Holliday. Come on. I am so sick of being aware of other religions to the point we are supposed to be ashamed of our own. Have a Hannukah section, have an Islamic section, but don't exclude the Christians."
Pull it together, Barnes and Noble! I am so SICK of being AWARE of other religions! It's disgusting!
Pull it together, Barnes and Noble! I am so SICK of being AWARE of other religions! It's disgusting!
40
@28- It doesn't matter what Jesus did during his lifetime. The only important part of Jesus's life was when he got tortured to death so I wouldn't have to go to Hell.
41
Um, isn't the "reason for the season" the angle of the planet in relation to the sun and your location on it? Also I'm pretty sure there was winter before there was Jesus, though maybe all that archaeology stuff is just God messing with us like he did with the dinosaurs.
42
Jesus Christ (literally). I can't get over this update on the sidebar:
More INCLUSIVE? It might be a lot of things, but how could even the most rabid fundamentalist describe it as INCLUSIVE? Argh.
many retailers are waking up to the fact that it is more inclusive to mention "Christmas."
More INCLUSIVE? It might be a lot of things, but how could even the most rabid fundamentalist describe it as INCLUSIVE? Argh.
43
I think they're going to be hard to troll because they moderate all posting BEFORE letting the public see them.
Sigh.
Sigh.
44
The "reason for the season" is actually the Sun, since Dec 25th was originally a celebration for the shortest day of the year according to the Sol Invictus pagan sun worshippers in the Roman Empire.
The only reason the early christians claimed the 25th for their god was to try to convert Roman pagans by confusing and co-opting an existing holiday that they were already accustomed to celebrating on the 25th.
The best guesses for Jesus's actual birthday would be sometime in May or possibly August.
The only reason the early christians claimed the 25th for their god was to try to convert Roman pagans by confusing and co-opting an existing holiday that they were already accustomed to celebrating on the 25th.
The best guesses for Jesus's actual birthday would be sometime in May or possibly August.
45
They make frontline staff at the library crazy, too. They fucking insist you say Merry Christmas to them -- Happy Holidays won't cut it. If the library isn't decorated, they complain because we're being soooooo politically correct (like the library has a budget for buying Christmas decorations). In locations that do decorate, they assume the staff are all big christers, and they bitch to us about the places that don't decorate to their satisfaction. They're working hard at making Christmas, like everything else associated with them, a pain in the ass instead of a joy.
46
I worked at a small independent men's clothing store for a number of years. During the December retail rush, I would always say goodbye to customers with, "Have a happy Holiday." Every year there would be the few who responded in pseudo-anger, "It's not 'Holiday,' it's Christmas!"
Towards the end I took to answering, "But I'm Jewish... ?"
A common response [I'm not actually Jewish, just a hard-core agnostic] was, "Well, it's okay for you then."
Towards the end I took to answering, "But I'm Jewish... ?"
A common response [I'm not actually Jewish, just a hard-core agnostic] was, "Well, it's okay for you then."
47
I love the person who complained, "Is nothing sacred?" on that site. Apparently not Christmas, if your main concern is whether people are utilizing it to its full potential as a mechanism for encouraging sales of consumer goods.
48
I wish they had an option to add other establishments, because I totally have a lot to say about the lack of Christmas decorations at Rick's.
49
WSWJB
Which Snuggie Would Jesus Buy
judge not, lest ye be posting and rating your judgements on the internet.
This a always a great time of year to be an atheist. The nutty bunch get all twisted up aboutsome made up slight, every year. The comedy writes itself.
Which Snuggie Would Jesus Buy
judge not, lest ye be posting and rating your judgements on the internet.
This a always a great time of year to be an atheist. The nutty bunch get all twisted up aboutsome made up slight, every year. The comedy writes itself.
51
We need a name for the version of Christmas (gifts, trees, holiday spirit, lotsa food, santa, not worshiping jesus, etc.) that's celebrated by non-christians.
Any ideas?
Any ideas?
52
@44:
I would have been no later than May actually. Joseph was going to Bethlehem to be counted in the annual Roman Census which was carried out in mid-to-late Spring, because, aside from people, livestock et al was also counted in order to determine tax levies, and counting in the Spring, after birthing season, ensured the numbers in herds and flocks was maximized.
So really, Christians have nothing to complain about if nobody wishes them a "Merry Christmas" in December, because their alleged savior was born at least four months later anyway.
I would have been no later than May actually. Joseph was going to Bethlehem to be counted in the annual Roman Census which was carried out in mid-to-late Spring, because, aside from people, livestock et al was also counted in order to determine tax levies, and counting in the Spring, after birthing season, ensured the numbers in herds and flocks was maximized.
So really, Christians have nothing to complain about if nobody wishes them a "Merry Christmas" in December, because their alleged savior was born at least four months later anyway.
54
@53,
And SLOG is basically a year-round "airing of grievances" too, so we're already in the right place.
And SLOG is basically a year-round "airing of grievances" too, so we're already in the right place.
55
"Very offended by the recent advertisement. How dare they suggest we celebrate what we want? This is a Christian nation."
I HATE it when people let me celebrate what I want!
I HATE it when people let me celebrate what I want!
56
On a related note, I'm doing my christmas shopping, which will be wrapped in nativity scene paper with bible verses and such, for a good christian friend. got that all covered. the thing is, i'm still not sure what vibrator to get her, since she has such an extensive collection already? how do i maintain the spirit of the season, and not just repeat the same old, same old?
57
@51 (and other Sloggers): the opening scene of Less Than Zero (bad book, worse movie) starts off with Christmas in L.A.: Santa and palm trees on Santa Monica Boulevard. I always thought it was cynical (whoever imagined Christmas--snow, reindeer, evergreen trees--in L.A., the desert! ha!). Finally, of course, it dawned on me that Jesus was born in a damn desert. A palm tree is way more in keeping with the spirit than a Douglas fir (even a $5 Douglas fir from Chubby & Tubby, R.I.P.).
Guess I won't be hired to decorate any Wal-Marts this year.
Guess I won't be hired to decorate any Wal-Marts this year.
58
Not everyone views Christmas as a religious holiday. It was actually chosen so that the christians could celebrate their holiday to coincide with the pagan winter solstice. Not every store or business owner is christian.If you have a problem with how they decorate or merchantise, I suggest you only shop christian stores or open your own. It's not the rest of the worlds' job to cater to your beleifs.
59
I guess i was'nt really done there. How much jewish themed merchandising do you see in retail? Do you think their beleifs are any less important than yours? Do you care what anyone else wants or beleives? Stop whining and get online and shop if you think the stores are not up to your standards instead ofloudly complaining so that everyone knows you're a "christian".
60
@53 - wow, I should've remembered that before I wrote that post. Now I feel dumb...
But at least I'm not bitching about Wal-Mart not selling Jesus wrapping paper :)
But at least I'm not bitching about Wal-Mart not selling Jesus wrapping paper :)
61
The part of all this that chaps me is that now is actually Advent, the season of joyful anticipation of the blah, blah, blah; pull a chocolate from the calender.
Christmas, on the other hand, is a specific day and the Christmas Season extends from then out into January, with maids-a-milking and all.
Religiously speaking, fuck their early December merriment and the ignorance of their supposed faith that it espouses. That crap needs to be locked away until the actual season, turn, turn, turn.
Christmas, on the other hand, is a specific day and the Christmas Season extends from then out into January, with maids-a-milking and all.
Religiously speaking, fuck their early December merriment and the ignorance of their supposed faith that it espouses. That crap needs to be locked away until the actual season, turn, turn, turn.
62
@9 FTW. What the hell are "'Christmas alternative' holiday items", anyway? Damn all these foreigners and their foreign gods. You should totally demand that they only celebrate AMERICAN gods. Like Walmart and Ford. (Christianity comes from Israel, you know, so it's not actually American.)
@5280 @8: I plan to. By celebrating the winter solstice with a bunch of pagan friends. Only it's the summer solstice here (other side of the planet, like).
@5280 @8: I plan to. By celebrating the winter solstice with a bunch of pagan friends. Only it's the summer solstice here (other side of the planet, like).
63
HOW DARE YOU ALL! HOW DARE YOU!
How dare you tell these bigots to only shop at Christian stores and only buy explicitly Christian-themed gifts!
Think of the CHILDREN!
Seriously, Christmas morning has to be a serious downer at the folks' homes.
How twisted to you have to be to buy an iPod in November and complain that the store wasn't explicitly Christian enough?
Or to complain that anyone didn't wish you a Merry Christmas in November simply because you were shopping?
On another note, I'd love to see some Nativity themed Christmas wrap that was Biblically accurate - as in, showing a 14-year-old Middle Eastern girl who just had unassisted natural childbirth in a frigging stable in midwinter.
Seriously, when was the last time you saw a Nativity set where the Infant wasn't the size of a two-year-old and Mary's hair, makeup, and perfectly draped gown weren't spotless? THAT'S a miracle!
How dare you tell these bigots to only shop at Christian stores and only buy explicitly Christian-themed gifts!
Think of the CHILDREN!
Seriously, Christmas morning has to be a serious downer at the folks' homes.
How twisted to you have to be to buy an iPod in November and complain that the store wasn't explicitly Christian enough?
Or to complain that anyone didn't wish you a Merry Christmas in November simply because you were shopping?
On another note, I'd love to see some Nativity themed Christmas wrap that was Biblically accurate - as in, showing a 14-year-old Middle Eastern girl who just had unassisted natural childbirth in a frigging stable in midwinter.
Seriously, when was the last time you saw a Nativity set where the Infant wasn't the size of a two-year-old and Mary's hair, makeup, and perfectly draped gown weren't spotless? THAT'S a miracle!
66
This was the funniest website (and funniest comment thread) I've seen in a long time. Thank you.
But I've apparently been spending too much time on Slog, because, at first glance, I thought the "Stand for Christmas" website header was NSFW.
But I've apparently been spending too much time on Slog, because, at first glance, I thought the "Stand for Christmas" website header was NSFW.
67
They forgot the #1 offense to Jesus. Faithful Christians turning the celebration of his birthday into a whorefest at the mall.
68
@4 - If it were me, I would have said - "To celebrate what is important to each of us in this post-Harvest, New year season. We just say 'Christmas' a lot in our store because we are hucksters and you are gullible. "
69
Funny. Look at all those new comments by "True Faithful" on their site. I wonder who put all those up. ;)
71
I walked into a Best Buy and got to see some poor manager dealing with one of these. Thanks to reading SLOG I knew when chapter and verse said that womenfolk have to shut it in the presence of menfolk. Manager was rather pleased to be rid of her. Didn't get a discount or anything but still made me feel good. Thank you SLOG!
73
I ask a clerk, "What is the reason for the season?" and I get back "What?".
My answer is always "the Earth's revolution around the sun." The *season* is winter, you dolts! Christmas is one religion's holiday, one of many, and you're lucky enough that it was secularized, or it wouldn't be paid time off from work and a tree in every store. You'd have people asking the day after why you weren't in the office yesterday and you'd be out searching for ornaments in among the menorahs. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be off equal opportunity bastardizing religious holidays and baking Christmas cookies while I fry up some latkes.
My answer is always "the Earth's revolution around the sun." The *season* is winter, you dolts! Christmas is one religion's holiday, one of many, and you're lucky enough that it was secularized, or it wouldn't be paid time off from work and a tree in every store. You'd have people asking the day after why you weren't in the office yesterday and you'd be out searching for ornaments in among the menorahs. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be off equal opportunity bastardizing religious holidays and baking Christmas cookies while I fry up some latkes.
74
Ha - reason for the season? Uhm, go ahead and find me the page in your holy book where it says 'thou shalt SHOP on the lord's son's birthday', or 'thou shalt commence in commerce in the name of the lord' or 'december is foreth the capitolism'. Go ahead.
*chirr...chirrr*
The reason for the shopping season -from a business POV- is profit aka GREED, kids, and the good books, all the big three in fact, have things to say about that.
AFA and fellow faith folks:
please redistribute your time and energy: go to the elderly homes, go to the hospitals, the jails, the homeless centers, the places where there are kids in need. Spend your time, your money, your chain-email-forwarding energies & your excess STUFF helping and doing good works. That warm feeling you'll have by boxing day? It's like giving yourself a present.
Your EXAMPLE will be the gift you can give, and shhh but it's the real reason for the season.
You know, the queen refuses to say "Merry Christmas" too*. AFA should get on her arse.
* = because Merry means drunk, so it would be improper for her to wish a merry christmas... she instead calls it a Happy Christmas.
@48 - go to the lusty lady instead. "JINGLE BALLS" says it all, methinks.
@27 Oy vey. You know what goes well with that wine?
Cheese.
I'm just sayin'. Yum.
@26 & @24:: Hrm, wonder which it is: either Flirting in an office romance, or Trying to prove you're all hat no cattle ? (just judging from the avatar photos).
@all
No love for Diwali? Midwinter? KWANZAA?
*sigh*
@all:
What no Festivus Pole? We've clearly got the AIRING OF GRIEVENCES going on already...
@54 DRAT. I see you've noticed the 'airing' first. Tip of the hat, fellow slogger, tip. of. the. hat.
75
WalMart is apparently VERY Christmas friendly. Its so nice to see a noble, pro Jesus/pro Real America corporation standing up for Traditional Judeo-Christian Values. Damned if a single tear isn't running down my cheek.
76
"Well, exactly...early Christianity stole EVERYTHING from every other religion...very little of the trappings of Christianity is original...they just ripped off the Jews and the Romans and the Etruscans and the Greeks and everybody else within earshot."
NAH, YOU'RE CONFUSING CATHOLOCISM WITH CHRISTIANITY. CATHOLOCISM IS NOT EVEN CHRISTIAN.
NAH, YOU'RE CONFUSING CATHOLOCISM WITH CHRISTIANITY. CATHOLOCISM IS NOT EVEN CHRISTIAN.
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