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News & ArtsFriday, November 27, 2009
Animals / Sports / Tech PETA Recommends Robot Mascot
Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Fri, Nov 27, 2009 at 1:25 PM
- amazon.com
- WowWee Wrex the Dawg: "The three moods and three desires are expressed in lucky crazy slot machine eye."
PETA's got its panties in a bunch over the University of Georgia using a real bulldog as their mascot. PETA considers the breeding of bulldogs inherently cruel—they are prone to all sorts of health issues and tend to die young—and is thus recommending that the next mascot, Uga the Eighth, be an animatronic one.
Certainly it is depraved to continue inbreeding these poor dogs when they're becoming more and more hopelessly messed up because of it—Uga the Seventh died at only age four, due to congenital heart problems, which also were the demise of Uga #6. In my limited experience with bulldogs—when I was a kid, a man named Bernie re-roofed our house, and he would bring approximately 12 bulldogs with him on the job every day—they are tumorous, asthmatic, phlegm-leaking little ogres that sure as hell seem miserable.
But if one were to extend this logic to its natural conclusion—we're all prone to all sorts of health issues and the tendency to die—shouldn't robots replace all forms of life? Or at least British royalty?
Meanwhile, PETA does not yet seem to have read this.
3
Domestic animals live longer, healthier, happier lives than their feral cousins. Even when those lives are less than the ideal a well-cared for pet gets to experience.
4
Most people will just laugh at this latest idea from them. As usual, PETA continues to be its own worst enemy.
8
Most tiny dogs, especially the ones that ladies carry around in their purses, are useless little shit machines. (except of course that the fluffy ones can be tied to the end of a long pole & used to dust windows.)
Otherwise a dog should be big & fierce enough to be able to scare away terrorist intruders or break up a tavern fight.
But no, you were hamhandedly trolling for click-throughs, trying to make people pay attention to, and trump up controversy about, the latest BJC meat memoir.
Well, you got your click-through, but I didn't mean it. I ain't biting. I say to you, that shit is so over, so done, zzzz... and it's not butch to pout cause your posturing is being ignored.
10
they are tumorous, asthmatic, phlegm-leaking little ogres that sure as hell seem miserable.
Awesome.
Also, PETA or no (and for my vote, it's always no), has anyone really considered just how great that would sound yelled over the P.A. system at a football game? "And now, your University of Georgia Fighting Robo-Dogs!!" And just think of the suit the on-field mascot would get. Awesome!
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