Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Homo School Cancels Prom Rather Than Letting Lesbian Student Attend With Her Girlfriend
Posted by Dan Savage on Wed, Nov 11, 2009 at 1:53 PM
Cynthia Stewart, a 17-year-old junior at Tharptown High School in northern Alabama, is a member of her school’s prom planning committee, had personally raised over $200 for the prom, and created the theme her classmates had chosen for the dance. She is also an out lesbian. When Cynthia approached her principal to ask if she could bring her girlfriend with her to the prom, he said no. He also made Cynthia remove a sticker she was wearing that said, “I am a lesbian,” telling her, “You don't have that much freedom of speech at school.” Cynthia’s aunt and guardian, Kathy Baker, then appealed the principal’s decision to the school board. But the board let the decision to bar Cynthia from bringing her girlfriend to the prom stand.
Then the ACLU got involved and the school cancelled the prom altogether. Maybe the gays—so good at throwing parties—could come together and rescue this kid's prom for her and her tolerant classmates? Raise some money, book a hotel ballroom somewhere, and invite the kids to come and dance without any interference from their asshole principal and the bigots on the school board. (Via JoeMyGod.)
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1
I think you meant "asshole principal."
The "asshole principle" means something else. I invite the comment crowd to suggest what that might be.
The "asshole principle" means something else. I invite the comment crowd to suggest what that might be.
2
It's way more complicated now-- she's invited and her date is now going to go through one of those silly screening processes small town schools go through in order to blah blah blah something about patriarchy: http://www.timesdaily.com/article/200911…
3
It blows my mind that they'd rather ruin the event for everyone than allow one out lesbian couple attend the event she worked so hard to put on.
4
I hope her fellow students stand behind her and make some attempt to protest this behavior by the school administration.
Otherwise, I'll gladly contribute to their renting a ballroom someplace. Just tell us where to send the $$. That would be excellent PR for the gay community-coming to the rescue of their Prom.
Otherwise, I'll gladly contribute to their renting a ballroom someplace. Just tell us where to send the $$. That would be excellent PR for the gay community-coming to the rescue of their Prom.
5
@3 petty authorities can be spectacularly stupid, especially since they are not used to being pushed back against. Let alone having their stupidity blow up into a national media story.
6
No, Carollani, you don't understand the way they think. She's the one who ruined it for everybody.
Fucking Alabama.
Fucking Alabama.
8
Awesome comment on timesdaily.com link.
This is another clear case of a lawer that needs to be taken out back to the wood shed !
If anything, open the bible to the pages of Sadom & Gamora and read for yourself what GOD thinks about this life style ! All the decent students at the school ought to boycot the event and make a stand for what is wright start takeing your country back America!!!!
This is another clear case of a lawer that needs to be taken out back to the wood shed !
If anything, open the bible to the pages of Sadom & Gamora and read for yourself what GOD thinks about this life style ! All the decent students at the school ought to boycot the event and make a stand for what is wright start takeing your country back America!!!!
12
I support single payer health care and the fire department and all sorts of social institutions, but is it really a vital function of the government to provide teenagers with a big dance party? What if the indispensable duty to educate the young were distinct from maintaining a teenagers entire social universe? What if the biggest night out of their lives was the responsibility of the local school board?
Dan's point about the gays -- or whoever -- throwing a party shows just how easy it is for a private group to have any kind of party they want. But a dance party in a government building with tax dollars? You're never going to please everyone that way, and it's always going to be a source of friction.
Cancel all the proms. Oh, and can the government stop building sports entertainment complexes too? Thx.
Dan's point about the gays -- or whoever -- throwing a party shows just how easy it is for a private group to have any kind of party they want. But a dance party in a government building with tax dollars? You're never going to please everyone that way, and it's always going to be a source of friction.
Cancel all the proms. Oh, and can the government stop building sports entertainment complexes too? Thx.
13
Perhaps there's a silver lining. How many of her hetero classmates would have gotten knocked up that night, creating the next generation of ign'ant Republicans? But then they'll probably get knocked up soon enough anyhow.
14
@12 - I see what you're saying, but very, very little, if any, tax dollars go toward prom. Students generally have to raise the money on their own, and faculty aren't paid overtime to attend.
17
@12 I seem to recall that when it came time for my high school prom, students had to raise money to put it on, and as @14 said, the faculty chaperones were volunteers. I'm pretty sure that's how it's commonly done.
19
Funny how some on this thread have answered ignorance with more ignorance.
Post the address to send money, i'll contribute.
Post the address to send money, i'll contribute.
20
Jesus, if it were only about who buys the balloons it wouldn't be an issue at all, would it? It's about who owns and legitimizes the function, and that's the local government. I mean come the fuck on.
If the argument that it were all paid for by student fundraiser held an ounce of water, then the ACLU would have no standing, would it? Go have a private event, where nobody's civil liberties can be infringed, and then the bickering stops. Easy.
If the argument that it were all paid for by student fundraiser held an ounce of water, then the ACLU would have no standing, would it? Go have a private event, where nobody's civil liberties can be infringed, and then the bickering stops. Easy.
21
I really hope the straights react in the same way when gay marriage comes, and just cancel marriage for everybody.
22
@3, ruining it for everyone was the whole point. Now the people who were on the fence or indifferent about teh gays will be hostile towards them in general and her in specific. I hope the poor girl doesn't get attacked or her home vandalized over this--but clearly that's what the bigots in charge want to see happen.
24
this reminds me of that case in the 90's where a gal tried to integrate her school's black prom and white prom resulting in both being cancelled and Raven Symone (of Cosby and That's So Raven fame) making a movie about it for Lifetime. Maybe these young ladies can get Logo to host the event at a nice hotel?
25
Why did she ask in the first place? Does everyone ask if they can bring a date to the prom?
I hope they got their money back, so they can take their business elsewhere.
I hope they got their money back, so they can take their business elsewhere.
26
The one thing that confuses me about the story is that she asked her principal whether she could bring her girlfriend. I've never heard of asking permission.
28
Also, I don't think my high school EVER held prom at the school building. They always rented a ballroom at the local ritzy hotel.
29
@25: From reading the TimesDaily link @2, there is a screening process for any "out of district" dates. So it's doubtful that they could have attended "unofficially". Nor should they have to sneak, anyway.
30
Of course she should've asked permission. It's hardly better to wait until the day of and get ejected from the prom.
31
She could have gone with her girlfriend without stating it was her girlfriend. No one would have known. At my prom there were plenty of non-gay girls dancing with girls and taking pictures with girls. Heck, straight girls even kissed each other (yes I know they were straight) at my prom. So I think she asked the principal's permission specifically because she knew this would be his reaction and she wanted to make a point politically, because let's face it: prom is really lame. I'd rather make a political point than go to prom too.
32
But, as noted at the very beginning of the article on JMG, the school has changed its mind and is proceeding with the prom and allowing the couple to attend. Not sure how you missed that, Dan.
33
@ 16 fuck the principal, not the south. yes, the principal in this article is an ignorant piece of shit. and he was almost definitely born and raised in or near the part of alabama the high school is in. i'm sure the same can be said about the two young women in the story, and they are standing up and fighting for their rights n stuff. my point is this kind of shit happens all over america, alabama, indiana, montana,,,and usually the more rural the setting the longer it takes for social change to sink in. i am so sick of people equating bigotry and ignorance with the south.
34
@33 Then work hard to change the south. That stereotype didn't just get pulled out of thin air, and the sad fact of the matter is that the Southern US is backwoods, backwards, and violently averse to change. Are there decent people there? You bet your ass there are. The problem is that accepting, conscientious people there won't speak up for fear of getting beaten by angry rednecks. People equate the same things with the deep midwest as well. The south has just been perfecting stupid longer, so it's a little more ingrained.
36
I'm glad they've "changed their mind," though it's not exactly big of them, considering that I'm positive they're only doing it because of the negative media attention. Still, this has got the be the one of the cruelest things I have ever heard of. Laying aside the issue of this poor girl not being able to bring her girlfriend to an event she worked so hard for, what about all the other kids? How would you have felt at sixteen if you were suddenly told that your prom was canceled?
Assholes.
Assholes.
37
@34 have you ever lived in the south? or do you have any facts to back up what you say about life in the south in the twenty first century? i live in the north right now, moved here from the very deep south. just based on my own life experience (which i realize is not a stack of cold hard facts) if i had absolutely zero knowledge of history i would think the north is a bastion of racism, not the south.
39
Why did she ask if she could bring her girlfriend? Duh, girl, you live in bumblefuck and you bothered to ask the principles permission!? You should have just shown up with her, and forced them to see how far they were willing to go with their bigotry there. Oh, well, lets see how the student body reacts, if they support you and demand a prom for themselves, as well as you and your lady.
41
I'm surprised so many people are wondering about asking permission (same on other sites running this story). Did none of you ever have outside dates to prom? Every school I've ever heard of requires a form filled out ahead of time if you bring a date that doesn't go to your school or is in a lower grade, because they need to know for safety/liability purposes who is actually there. Of course, the way around it is to have an opposite sex friend fill out the form for you, but maybe she wanted to make a point.
42
@21: If anything, "the straights" wouldn't do that. Rather, just toss civil marriage for anyone out the window and nullify all existing civil marriages by constitutional amendment (yeah, it'll never happen) to be re-classed as "registered domestic partners" while guaranteeing that "registered domestic partners" is blind to the sex of the two partners.
"Marriage" can stay in the house of worship. If you can't keep it in the bedroom, then keep it at the altar.
"Marriage" can stay in the house of worship. If you can't keep it in the bedroom, then keep it at the altar.
43
@20 - making proms an official school function keeps them from being clique-exclusive crap where the rich, popular kids tell the "undesirables" that they can't come. I guarantee that would happen if it wasn't a school event; it would just become another stupid "cool kid" party.
...which might actually be a good thing. No more pressure on the geeks and dorks and weirdos (i.e., people who don't intend to live by the almighty Rules of High School for the rest of their lives) to be a part of it because it's "inclusive."
...which might actually be a good thing. No more pressure on the geeks and dorks and weirdos (i.e., people who don't intend to live by the almighty Rules of High School for the rest of their lives) to be a part of it because it's "inclusive."
46
We live in a very small southern town, my daughters high school is the only high school in the county and it has around 400 to 450 students max, every year. There were 2 lesbians, both with dates at my daughters senior prom. Nobody said anything. Why would she even go and ask if she could bring her girlfriend? This only sets you up to be told no. My daughters school rule is no one over the age of 21 as a date. That's it. They are giving small towns a bad name.
47
I'm a Yankee. No, really a Yankee. New England. Y'all obviously hate my guts, so don't expect any sympathy out of me for you bigoted, backwoods Southern bullshit. Yeah, they're giving small towns a bad name. It goes without saying that they're also giving the South a bad name. But I figure you guys deserve all of that that we can possibly lay on you and more.
48
31.
But then she would have had to be closeted at her own prom. I think the point of all this is that she wanted to be at the prom with a date. A date she could dance with and be romantic with.
She could have gone with her girlfriend without stating it was her girlfriend. No one would have known.
But then she would have had to be closeted at her own prom. I think the point of all this is that she wanted to be at the prom with a date. A date she could dance with and be romantic with.
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