Slog
News & ArtsWednesday, November 4, 2009
Homo Catholics Are the New Mormons
Posted by Dominic Holden on Wed, Nov 4, 2009 at 3:19 PM
Catholics are strutting around boasting about their role in repealing Maine's gay marriage law. At least they're taking responsibility for it. Catholics are the new Mormons—which sucks for me because I was raised Catholic. Can I unbaptize myself? Can I do it in a hot tub? How many guys will it take?
1
So you think this means that they won't act surprised when protesters start picketing outside their doors, like the Mormons did? Because I think they'll still play the victim if that happens.
2
One hot tub, a Catholics, a Jew, a Muslim, a Wiccan, and an atheist, no clothing, a lot of alcohol, a video camera, and a stamped envelope addressed to your nearest parish with the following note: "Thanks for not ruining my fun by forcing legally binding monogamy on my lifestyle."
3
on the other hand, local Catholics were heavily involved in the Mallahan campaign, which caused Seattle voters to vote and King County to vote, and this resulted in 71 passing in this state ....
not everything is a square peg.
not everything is a square peg.
4
Good luck with that. I've been trying to get excommunicated for years. Once you're in, you can't get out.
5
I'm an ex-catholic. You may have read me write how much I despise that disgusting church and religion. Ugly, ugly religion. It should give you some comfort that the catholic bishops in this state were against 71 as they were against "Death with dignity". Losers.
6
Instead of painting with broad brush, why not look to the inclusive Catholic parish a block from where you were brought up . . . or to the woman in Maine, a eucharistic minister at her church, who penned an op-ed in support of same-sex marriage.
Is she strutting?
State Sen. Ed Murray, chief architect of everything-but-marriage, is a Catholic. He's still inside, fighting for social justice.
'Realize there's a Stranger party line -- Christians are not part of community, as we define it -- but don't be a pander bear.
Is she strutting?
State Sen. Ed Murray, chief architect of everything-but-marriage, is a Catholic. He's still inside, fighting for social justice.
'Realize there's a Stranger party line -- Christians are not part of community, as we define it -- but don't be a pander bear.
8
I still have a consecrated communion host on my bookshelf that I decided not to swallow a few years ago. Maybe I'll Fed Ex it or mail out like some sort of chain messiah. Does anybody know if these things have an expiration date. What is the shelf life of saviours these day anyway. Do deities go stale?
12
Did anyone for one minute think the enemies of Gay Americans are NOT the Radical Religious Extremists? It's always been the "Communities of Faith" (what ever that means) that have caused horrible bloodshed, misery, and ignorance. They used to burn Homos at the stake (faggot) thinking it was the right thing to do. They still think it's okay to dehumanize Gay Americans as unworthy of the same civil rights they enjoy.
13
fashion tip for Catholics becoming the new Mormons - invest in firms that produce really boring art - no, more boring - paintings that totally lack any life in them - yeah, like that.
15
Folks, since we've had some of the same problems with the church over in this little island of ours, some genius figured out the details. Have a look at http://www.countmeout.ie, in the FAQ section, theres how you go about removing yourself from the Catholic Church. One of the links it posts there is for the USA, http://www.atheistactivist.org/Defect.ht….
Hope it helps!
Hope it helps!
16
I am also a retired Catholic (people who refer to themselves as "recovering Catholics" are bores) but you know they still count you as a member, because you were baptized.
Somebody should start a website for ex-Catholics, to show the world and the church, that people are leaving in droves. I don't know anyone who went to Catholic school who is still a practicing Catholic.
But don't make it bitter. I don't want to hear the whiners. I just want the numbers.
Somebody should start a website for ex-Catholics, to show the world and the church, that people are leaving in droves. I don't know anyone who went to Catholic school who is still a practicing Catholic.
But don't make it bitter. I don't want to hear the whiners. I just want the numbers.
17
@9: I dunno. The Mormon theocracy encompasses a single state. The Catholics technically have their own *country*.
18
Dom: if you are are a practicing Christian, then join a church that doesn't oppose gay rights (there are many), get a copy of your membership letter, and send a copy to your parish priest, bishop, archbishop, cardinal and pope and explain exactly why you have left the faith. Don't be a mystery. Let these idiots know that they are on the wrong side of history. Use analogies if you must ("I wouldn't have tolerated the Church's support of Nazis, slavery, invasion of undeveloped countries, inquisition, etc."), and put yourself on record as being on the right side of history.
20
Interesting fact:
The annual census of Catholics worldwide is based on tabulations by each individual parish, which are sent to their respective dioceses, and on to Rome.
The number of Catholics in a parish is determined by the total number of persons baptized in that parish minus the number that have died. Therefore, even if you've left the church, it's very likely that you're still counted as a Catholic year after year, even if you were never confirmed, never married Catholic, etc. The priests I've spoken to all say that they don't take into account those who have intentionally left the church due to ideological differences, or conversion to another faith due to marriage...certainly they don't factor in those who have become de facto ex-Catholics due to a loss of interest over time. As far as Rome's concerned, Dominic, you're probably one more Catholic for the books.
Makes you wonder how Rome will explain the stats if this generation of lapsed Catholics fails en masse to bring their children along for baptism. It used to be that even the most weaksauce Catholics would have their kids baptized, "just in case." I'm not so sure that's happening anymore.
The annual census of Catholics worldwide is based on tabulations by each individual parish, which are sent to their respective dioceses, and on to Rome.
The number of Catholics in a parish is determined by the total number of persons baptized in that parish minus the number that have died. Therefore, even if you've left the church, it's very likely that you're still counted as a Catholic year after year, even if you were never confirmed, never married Catholic, etc. The priests I've spoken to all say that they don't take into account those who have intentionally left the church due to ideological differences, or conversion to another faith due to marriage...certainly they don't factor in those who have become de facto ex-Catholics due to a loss of interest over time. As far as Rome's concerned, Dominic, you're probably one more Catholic for the books.
Makes you wonder how Rome will explain the stats if this generation of lapsed Catholics fails en masse to bring their children along for baptism. It used to be that even the most weaksauce Catholics would have their kids baptized, "just in case." I'm not so sure that's happening anymore.
21
Who's surprised? After all, it's a well-established fact that the Catholic establishment reckon it's better for an older man to force himself on unwilling children than it is for two people of the same gender to be in a committed, consensual relationship.
22
heywhatsit is correct... you can't leave. They can kick you out through excommunication, but you cannot voluntarily quit. I tried. The official church doctrine is that "baptism leaves an indelible mark upon your soul." You are stained for life. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
24
It seems to me that it would not matter if you were on the Catholic churches roles. They do not come around and bug you or anything. There are a multitude of inactive Catholics. The church does not even know where they are. Or even care. The Catholic church does not keep track of its members like the Mormon church does.
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