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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

We All Fall Down

Posted by on Wed, Oct 28, 2009 at 3:51 PM

HuffPo reports:

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The world's largest retailer wants to keep its customers even after they die.

Wal-Mart has started selling caskets on its Web site at prices that undercut many funeral homes, long the major seller of caskets.

The move follows a similar one by discount rival Costco, which also sells caskets on its site.

Wal-Mart, based in Bentonville, Ark., quietly put up about 15 caskets and dozens of urns on its Web site last week.

Prices range from $999 for models like "Dad Remembered" and "Mom Remembered" steel caskets to the mid-level $1,699 "Executive Privilege."

The surprise for me is that Costco already sells discount caskets and Wal-Mart is playing catch-up.


And now for a line from one of the greatest poems of the 19th century, The Communist Manifesto:

All fixed, fast frozen relations, with their train of ancient and venerable prejudices and opinions, are swept away, all new-formed ones become antiquated before they can ossify.

All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses his real condition of life and his relations with his kind.


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Comments (21) RSS

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smade 1
Jessica Mitford would be most pleased.
Posted by smade on October 28, 2009 at 3:52 PM
2
Modestly priced receptacles
Posted by Porkchop Sandwiches! on October 28, 2009 at 3:59 PM
emor 3
I thought it was funny the one time I walked into a Costco in the Bay Area and right there in the front next to the entrance was a gigantic coffin display. I haven't seen that at any of the other Costcos I've been to. Considering how much effort they put into regional marketing, maybe it was an older or more death-prone part of California?
Posted by emor on October 28, 2009 at 4:34 PM
Will in Seattle 4
The best caskets are the Hello Kitty ones.

They had coffins at the first Costco, as I recall.

In the end, you're better off renting a box and having it returned minus a basic body bag, if you're going to bury a body. Or store them upright and save the land.
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on October 28, 2009 at 4:43 PM
Dougsf 5
Wal-Mart's just covering their bases, pandemic-wise.
Posted by Dougsf on October 28, 2009 at 4:45 PM
6
Did this..

"All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses his real condition of life and his relations with his kind."

inspire this...

"
A few light taps upon the pane made him turn to the window. It had begun to snow again. He watched sleepily the flakes, silver and dark, falling obliquely against the lamplight. The time had come for him to set out on his journey westward. Yes, the newspapers were right: snow was general all over Ireland. It was falling on every part of the dark central plain, on the treeless hills, falling softly upon the Bog of Allen and, farther westward, softly falling into the dark mutinous Shannon waves. It was falling, too, upon every part of the lonely churchyard on the hill where Michael Furey lay buried. It lay thickly drifted on the crooked crosses and headstones, on the spears of the little gate, on the barren thorns. His soul swooned slowly as he heard the snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead."

?
Posted by I think this is interesting on October 28, 2009 at 4:54 PM
Suz 7
Buying a casket through a funeral home is a rip-off. I'm glad that Costco and Walmart offer an alternative.

My parents want simple pine boxes. My grandmother was cremated and her ashes were mailed to the house in a small cardboard box. My father, being the sentimental mid-westerner that he is, buried her in that same box. He could have wrap it up in some wrapping paper at least! As for me, cremation and then placed inside a pretty box and set on the mantle.
Posted by Suz on October 28, 2009 at 5:01 PM
John M 8
"Regal Wide Body Steel Casket
4" wider than standard sizes"

Walmart sells a casket for fat people. I'm trying to be mortified but it makes so much sense for so many reasons. Frankly I'm kind of surprised that it's just the one designed for fatties.
Posted by John M on October 28, 2009 at 5:14 PM
Vince 9
None of these seem very eco-friendly.
Posted by Vince on October 28, 2009 at 5:27 PM
Urgutha Forka 10
I want to be liquefied, except for my eyeballs, and put inside a crystal ball. Then give me to some gypsy or fortune-teller or something.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on October 28, 2009 at 5:32 PM
Urgutha Forka 11
I want to be liquefied, except for my eyeballs, and put inside a crystal ball. Then give me to some gypsy or fortune-teller or something.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on October 28, 2009 at 5:32 PM
elenchos 12
My wishes are for my remains to be Verdinglichen.
Posted by elenchos on October 28, 2009 at 5:45 PM
13
I don't want to be cremated because I wish to retain the option to rise and feast on the flesh of the living when the zombie apocolypse is upon us.
Posted by lol on October 28, 2009 at 5:59 PM
Hernandez 14
Personally, I've always wanted to be preserved in hot sand in a desert somewhere. When it comes to corpse disposal, no one ever thinks about becoming an archaeological curiosity.
Posted by Hernandez http://hernandezlist.blogspot.com on October 28, 2009 at 6:41 PM
Max Solomon 15
caskets are already an anachronism.
Posted by Max Solomon on October 28, 2009 at 8:49 PM
16
Why not? Wal-Mart is a great spot to buy cheap junk you're only going to use once.
Posted by Jk on October 28, 2009 at 9:19 PM
Rob in Baltimore 17
I want a Dollar Tree funeral.

Funeral Director: “What other funerary services may we provide for the predeceased?”

Homer: “Oh, the whole deal. Coffin, tombstone, anti-stink spray.”

Director: Sir, we prefer the term casket to coffin and monument to tombstone. We have all the leading brands of anti-stink spray. Country Mourn, Mrs. Rotwell's, Stank-Off.
Posted by Rob in Baltimore http://www.wishbookweb.com/ on October 29, 2009 at 6:25 AM
Catalina Vel-DuRay 18
Buy my body an "All Aboard America" pass on Amtrak, and let them deal with it.
Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay http://www.danlangdon.com on October 29, 2009 at 7:24 AM
JF 19
@17 That's a grade "a" referrence. You get two points for that.
Posted by JF on October 29, 2009 at 7:30 AM
20
The funeral business has always been manipulative and shady. I'm glad that caskets are being sold w/o all the BS associated with the "funeral home experience."
Posted by AAJJSS on October 29, 2009 at 9:41 AM
21
I'm weeping for the funeral home monopoly. What exactly are you pining for, Charles?
Posted by firewalkwithme on October 29, 2009 at 12:11 PM

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