Slog
News & ArtsWednesday, September 9, 2009
Politics That Didn't Take Long
Posted by Dan Savage on Wed, Sep 9, 2009 at 2:50 PM
California Assemblyman Mike "You're Dripping Out of Me!" Duvall—the anti-gay conservative Republican politician with a 100% rating from right-wing Christian groups who was cheating on his wife with two married female lobbyists—has resigned.
"I am deeply saddened that my inappropriate comments have become a major distraction for my colleagues in the Assembly, who are working hard on the very serious problems facing our state. I have come to the conclusion that it would not be fair to my family, my constituents or to my friends on both sides of the aisle to remain in office. Therefore, I have decided to resign my office, effective immediately, so that the Assembly can get back to work."
I'm thinking Duvall, now that he's out of office, won't be getting much lobbyist pussy anymore—and good luck getting into the wife's panties, Mike.
1
But...he'll still probably wind up with a six- or seven-figure salary as a lobbyist - the route taken by most ex-representatives.
No one ever promised that life was fair.
No one ever promised that life was fair.
3
Either that @1, or NOM will take him on as their "cruelly and unfairly victimized by the Socialist Librul Media" spokesman-of-the-month.
4
At least he'll be forced to go back to prostitutes now that his fellow lobbyists won't have to fuck him.
5
That must be the fastest sex scandal ever - from initial breaking news through the crappy apology to the resignation in what, two hours?
8
The guy I feel sorry for is the guy sitting next to him who had to listen to the damn story dripping right out of Duvall's mouth. I can sort of understand why a guy would want to fuck a lobbyist hooker; I don't understand why the guy would want to describe it to his cow orkers. Blech.
9
Don't worry, the America-hating Republic Party of No replacement for him will be just as twisted and just as closeted.
It's not like it's a Dem area.
It's not like it's a Dem area.
10
@8 From all the descriptions, the guy sounds like *exactly* the type of person who would brag about his infidelities in graphic detail to others. It's the cow orking that gets to me. That's some really vile shit right there.
13
I hope this guy just drops out of sight. 'santorum' I'm okay with. But if I have to hear the nickname 'Mike "You're Dripping Out of Me!" Duvall' more than, say, three more times, I'm boycotting Slog.
14
I wonder if cow orkers are truly sensitive to smut, or just repressing how very kinky they are.
Srsly, could we get "cow orkers" into the lexicon somehow? It's such a happy accident.
Srsly, could we get "cow orkers" into the lexicon somehow? It's such a happy accident.
20
Conservatives now how to deal with those of us who fall away - we urge them to resign or they are shunned.
Now if this guy was a liberal, he'd still be in office, and the libs would say, "Oh, personal pecadilloes don't matter, let's just move on."
Another example of liberal hypocrisy.
Now if this guy was a liberal, he'd still be in office, and the libs would say, "Oh, personal pecadilloes don't matter, let's just move on."
Another example of liberal hypocrisy.
22
I hate to break it to you sloggers, but Cow Orking is an internet tradition going back years if not decades, and Fnarf did not create it.
http://catb.org/jargon/html/C/cow-orker.…
http://catb.org/jargon/html/C/cow-orker.…
23
Wow, do you people really not know that one? I'm sure I've used "cow orker" on Slog before. I first heard it in about 1989, on alt.folklore.urban.
24
@23 fnarf, you slipped that one into the comment so smoothly, I guess we just didn't notice until it came dripping back out.
29
Please, please, pleaae....can we have a new term for the fluid (or act of) leaking out of a vagina? something using Duvall. may i suggest, I was Duvall'ing all morning from our wake up fuck.
30
I can't believe that guy gets laid. The thought of him naked is enough to make me sterile.
@6
And I'm with you - that dirty talk (along with his image) will haunt me for life.
@6
And I'm with you - that dirty talk (along with his image) will haunt me for life.
33
@20, you're missing the point. Libs don't run around preaching family values, anti-gay, anti-choice, anti-everything. THAT's why it's great fun when one of your liars drips out into the open.
34
@ 29,
No, not spooge-leaking. How about 'turning someone asexual'...as in: "I saw that Republican naked and it Duvall'd me".
@ 19,
She's a politician's wife. She'll stand by her man...and make the rest of his life a living hell while schtupping the pool boy.
No, not spooge-leaking. How about 'turning someone asexual'...as in: "I saw that Republican naked and it Duvall'd me".
@ 19,
She's a politician's wife. She'll stand by her man...and make the rest of his life a living hell while schtupping the pool boy.
35
@20 - first of all, what 33 said. Second, there is no way I would excuse *any* law-maker, liberal or conservative, for receiving any favors, sexual or not, from a lobbyist. That's actually illegal, while just cheating on your wife is not.
36
Right, it's his "comments" that are the problem. Not the fact that he's another hypocritical cheating fuck.
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