Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« Re: Seadawgs | I Thought We, Er, Licked Santorum A… »

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Health This Just In

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Aug 11, 2009 at 5:44 PM

Malaysia's state-run news agency is urging its readers to avoid homosexual sex and masturbation if they want to remain free of swine flu. An article published Sunday by Bernama, the Malaysian government news agency, singles out homosexual sex as an activity that can cause people to contract swine flu, while also emphasizing that "normal sexual union between members of the opposite sex was absolutely safe."

Comments (32) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

It's true. And picking your nose causes rickets. Trust me, I'm a doctor.

Posted by Fnarf

on August 11, 2009 at 5:52 PM

The only appropriate response I can think of: LOLWUT?

Posted by Terry Nguyen on August 11, 2009 at 5:55 PM

Malaysia will soon see a rise in gays and whackers.

Posted by slake on August 11, 2009 at 5:57 PM

Maybe they have been watching 'Deliverance'.

Posted by Paddle Faster, Boys! I hear Banjos!! on August 11, 2009 at 6:00 PM

These guys are crazy-
Swine Flu?
no way!
Now AIDS is a different story...

Posted by 53% of New AIDS Cases are Homosexuals on August 11, 2009 at 6:01 PM

@5 and you are 100% an asswipe

Posted by troll hunter on August 11, 2009 at 6:05 PM

@5: How many cases of AIDS are caused by masturbating?

Posted by 'Cause You're In A High-Risk Group For That on August 11, 2009 at 6:11 PM

@3. Exactly. According to right-wing logic, before this announcement, thousands of Malaysian's didn't even know about homosexuality. They just turned some of their citizens gay!

Posted by MR. Language Person on August 11, 2009 at 6:17 PM

Speaking of jerking off.

Quick.

How many people on the light rail train right now??

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe

on August 11, 2009 at 6:28 PM

6
7
sticks and stones, love...

Posted by Why so bitter? did you get the HAART resistant strain? on August 11, 2009 at 6:40 PM

What if one's normal opposite sex is with a partner who happens to be a pig?

Posted by kinaidos on August 11, 2009 at 6:46 PM

Almost all of the AIDS cases in Malaysia are among heterosexual drug addicts.

Posted by Fnarf

on August 11, 2009 at 6:50 PM

The linked site just screams credibility.

Posted by Treppenwitz on August 11, 2009 at 6:53 PM

Malaysia: 86% religious (Gallup).

Not a coincidence. When will we realize that our equality depends on putting ourselves ahead of religion? When will we move past this taboo about talking about faith?

Posted by Where's The Strategy? on August 11, 2009 at 6:59 PM

http://www.bernama.com/bernama/v5/newsin…

It's basically repeating the claims of this one dude who also thinks coconut milk cures syphilis. Duckter quack quack.

Posted by NaFun

on August 11, 2009 at 7:01 PM

Don't panic yet.

According to the original article (http://ecohealingsystem.blogspot.com/200…), it looks like it's still OK for fat dudes to have gay sex.

Since obese people don't drink enough water, they don't pee enough (and bonus, it doesn't burn when they do, like it does for people who masturbate with no lube), so there's enough calcium in their lymph to keep their immune system strong enough to fight off viruses.

See? It's not so bad. God's beautiful plan continues to unfold.

Posted by breakdown on August 11, 2009 at 7:07 PM

This is interesting....I guess I'm going to have to risk getting the H1N1 virus.

Posted by Lanis01 on August 11, 2009 at 7:28 PM

It is interesting

Posted by Hydraulic Valve

on August 11, 2009 at 7:57 PM

Will the gays stop at nothing?!? First they're trying to destroy all of our marriages, and now they're dabbling in pandemics! Who will save us?

Posted by Regina on August 11, 2009 at 8:52 PM

Well, this will be interesting to watch play out.

Posted by kim in portland

on August 11, 2009 at 9:56 PM

I've been wondering what "pig play" meant.

Posted by eclexia on August 11, 2009 at 10:49 PM

I'm okay with this.

Posted by Andy on August 12, 2009 at 12:28 AM

@15: Put de lime in de coconut an' call me in de morning.

Posted by Timmytee on August 12, 2009 at 12:41 AM

New meaning to the idea of a sex pig. Dan, I smell a new euphemism.

Posted by oneway on August 12, 2009 at 12:49 AM

And here I thought only the U.S had the world's stupidest right wingers.

Posted by Vince on August 12, 2009 at 5:16 AM

@ 25 - Not even close.

Posted by Chris in Vancouver WA on August 12, 2009 at 7:36 AM

Breaking: Malaysia's state-run news is full of shit, like every state-run news organization everywhere.

Posted by Greg on August 12, 2009 at 8:11 AM

In positive news, Saqib Ali, Member, Maryland state legislature has come out in support of Gay marriage. MD is still a couple of years from legalizing gay marriage

http://www.gazette.net/stories/07312009/…

Posted by no-name on August 12, 2009 at 8:13 AM

28
wow
that IS good news...

Posted by ALL THE DRINKS AT SLOG-HAPPY ARE ON ME !!! on August 12, 2009 at 8:31 AM

I wonder if masturbation and gay sex can be used as a vaccine for H1N1. If anybody needs me, I will be in the other room performing a self administered innoculation.

Posted by Reg on August 12, 2009 at 11:27 AM

Do masturbatory practices in Malaysia normally involve infected swine?

Posted by Geni on August 12, 2009 at 12:35 PM

Don't forget the guy in Gambia (the president? PM? You'd think I'd be paying more attention, seeing as my brother will probably be living there part time...) who claims that God gave him an herbal cure for AIDS, then told him not to release it for scientific study. Are the numbers of nutbars rising, or am I just paying more attention to them?

Posted by kathleenb on August 12, 2009 at 3:20 PM