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News & ArtsFriday, July 10, 2009
Books Today in Bad Ideas for Author Bios
Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Jul 10, 2009 at 12:58 PM
Superstar Books Intern Corey Kahler pointed out these two author bios to me. I don't know which one is worse.
Here is Patrick W. Galbraith, author of The Otaku Encyclopedia:
And here is Konrad Ventana, author of A Desperado's Daily Bread: A Novella: Book One of the Post-Lux Trilogy:
(If you can't tell: Mr. Ventana's right eye is glowing with lucky, pretty star-light. The press materials that came with this book suggest that he has cured cancer using nanotechnology.)
1
Good god, the second one is WAY worse. Plus they have that incorrect comma after pseudonym. I HATE that particular grammatical fuckup.
2
from Konrad's website:
"The author, an American scientist and visionary whose work in biochemistry and medicine remains shrouded in mystery" which is code for a hack with no scientific credentials and no way of proving any of his crackpot ideas empirically, therefore my work is mystery.
"The author, an American scientist and visionary whose work in biochemistry and medicine remains shrouded in mystery" which is code for a hack with no scientific credentials and no way of proving any of his crackpot ideas empirically, therefore my work is mystery.
5
I'm sure he's a nice enough guy and all, but American men that are obsessed with Japanese culture fully creep me out.
6
Care to explain that creep Dougsf? Are as equally creeped out by an American man obsessed with Pakistani culture?
7
Not to be a nitpicker (OK, sort of to be a nitpicker - what else have I got, really?), but isn't this "bad ideas for author photos," not bios? I mean, the bios aren't great, but it seems to be the photos that you're really ragging on.
8
you can get a Ph.D in otaku/anime? WTF? I want to get a fucking doctorate watching a bunch of cartoons too!
9
@7: For me, it's the whole package: The text supplements the photos. Konrad's text is obviously much worse, but the first one wouldn't be quite as bad without realizing that he wears that costume all the fucking time.
11
#6 - Never met one, but why the hell would I also mean Pakistani if I said Japanese? I'm not presenting this as science, but I can tell you every white dude I've know that's obsessed—not interested, but obsessed—with Japanese culture is, well, kinda a creep. Including friends I've had.
It seems well enough on the surface, next thing you know there's a space octopus raping schoolgirls and your former roommate is dating a girl that might barely be 18, to be more specific.
It seems well enough on the surface, next thing you know there's a space octopus raping schoolgirls and your former roommate is dating a girl that might barely be 18, to be more specific.
12
@11. Dougsf
God you are an idiot. I never implied that you meant Pakistani when you said Japanese. I just chose it at random as an example. I could have just as well said Brazillian, or Yugoslavian.
Good job stereotyping any obsessed otaku out there. There are plenty who do not fit into your narrow bigoted view. Your attempts at levity do nothing to hide the fact that you have some seriously fucked up views of your fellow human beings.
God you are an idiot. I never implied that you meant Pakistani when you said Japanese. I just chose it at random as an example. I could have just as well said Brazillian, or Yugoslavian.
Good job stereotyping any obsessed otaku out there. There are plenty who do not fit into your narrow bigoted view. Your attempts at levity do nothing to hide the fact that you have some seriously fucked up views of your fellow human beings.
13
@9 Paul Constant: actually he doesn't wear the costume all the time. I laughed when you posted that, because I knew of author 1 from reading Danny Choo's blog (http://dannychoo.com) about Japan and Japanese culture, and he's been pictured on there a number of times, not in costume.
So, my two cents.
So, my two cents.
14
@12 - You take my dribble a hell of a lot more seriously than you should. This is Slog, not Crossfire, (is that still a thing?), and these are my bullshit, albeit irrefutably true, anecdotes from life. Hey, everyone that doesn't know me any better thinks I'm a big stoner, when really I'm more of a drunk. So I understand not ALL otaku are just looking to bury their pixelated wangs into a giggling schoolgirl. I even think that Robotech was fully awesome.
You're right though, I do have some fucked-up ideas about my fellow human beings, but I didn't even think you were a total creep until you used the word otaku.
You're right though, I do have some fucked-up ideas about my fellow human beings, but I didn't even think you were a total creep until you used the word otaku.
15
@14, well excuse me for considering your "but American men..." line to be an all encompassing catch all for all those you find distasteful.
Otaku is their word. I merely used it to adequately describe the large varied group of people you are lumping your narrow bigoted hateful stereotype into.
Keep up with your lame attempts at humor. Must be nice to hide such inadequacies behind such a thin veil.
p.s. Robotech was shit. Try the originals that Carl Macek stole from.
Otaku is their word. I merely used it to adequately describe the large varied group of people you are lumping your narrow bigoted hateful stereotype into.
Keep up with your lame attempts at humor. Must be nice to hide such inadequacies behind such a thin veil.
p.s. Robotech was shit. Try the originals that Carl Macek stole from.
18
I wholeheartedly agree with Dougsf. Every guy I've known who is obsessed with anime and manga are always a bit anti-social and have a wierd Japanese school girl fetish.
Sorry if it hits too close to home Akbar, but it's fucking true.
Sorry if it hits too close to home Akbar, but it's fucking true.
22
To the so-called expert / critic who received some press materials about A Desperado's Daily Bread (thus betraying his opinion as a jaded PR insider): Before you embarrass yourself further than you already have, you might want to take a look at the following website -- www.epeiusbiotech.com -- where you will have the unique experience of learining something new ... perchance to meet an accomplished intellectual and patient advocate in the real word ... pechance to remove your foot from your hypercritical mouth.
The main theme of A Desperado's Daily Bread is the crucial value of the inspired individual -- as visionary, as artist, as dreamer -- for a society that has been lulled into a state of non-participation in the life-of-the-mind and acts of meaningful creativity. The author's pseudonym Konrad Ventana (literally 'Bold Counsel through a Window') is obviously strategic and necessary in the context of the material at hand and the responsibilities of drug development and patient care that are obviously beyond your imagination.
Perhaps you would be more comfortable with the armchair intellectuals who would have everyone run for the cure, walk for the cure, perhaps even sleep for the cure while cancer patients continue to languish on the chain of failed expectations.
If you had even bothered to read the actual book, as opposed to the publicists blurbs, you would have realized that the drama of the Desperado (like the real-world bio of the author) represents the strident promenade of a fully capable individual; one who is capable of accomplishing something that has never been accomplished before--the metaphor is expressed intellectually as mastery of genetic enginering and physically as free-solo rock climbing--and it is intended to provide the uninitiated with with a glimpse of the arc-welding brilliance of creativity without the reader having to scale the heights of either passion or despair ... which invariable comes with the territory.
Take a look at the award-winning video on the website, as well as this first book of the Post-Lux Trilogy that has already received both Editor's Choice and Rising Star designations, and you might find the purpose of the high-minded artistry in the service of Science in the service of Medicine in the service of humanity. Cheers, regardless.
More...
The main theme of A Desperado's Daily Bread is the crucial value of the inspired individual -- as visionary, as artist, as dreamer -- for a society that has been lulled into a state of non-participation in the life-of-the-mind and acts of meaningful creativity. The author's pseudonym Konrad Ventana (literally 'Bold Counsel through a Window') is obviously strategic and necessary in the context of the material at hand and the responsibilities of drug development and patient care that are obviously beyond your imagination.
Perhaps you would be more comfortable with the armchair intellectuals who would have everyone run for the cure, walk for the cure, perhaps even sleep for the cure while cancer patients continue to languish on the chain of failed expectations.
If you had even bothered to read the actual book, as opposed to the publicists blurbs, you would have realized that the drama of the Desperado (like the real-world bio of the author) represents the strident promenade of a fully capable individual; one who is capable of accomplishing something that has never been accomplished before--the metaphor is expressed intellectually as mastery of genetic enginering and physically as free-solo rock climbing--and it is intended to provide the uninitiated with with a glimpse of the arc-welding brilliance of creativity without the reader having to scale the heights of either passion or despair ... which invariable comes with the territory.
Take a look at the award-winning video on the website, as well as this first book of the Post-Lux Trilogy that has already received both Editor's Choice and Rising Star designations, and you might find the purpose of the high-minded artistry in the service of Science in the service of Medicine in the service of humanity. Cheers, regardless.
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