"A Ways Off": Obama, at G8, on the recovery.
Bankruptcy Looks Good On You: Meet your new GM.
Could It Be...Murder?: LAPD investigates Michael Jackson's death for criminal charges.
Deny, Deny, Deny: China attempts to spin their Urumqi unrest.
Expecting "Frank," Getting Ratzi: Obama to meet Nazi Pope for first time.
Fuck You, Too: Iranian protesters continue to fight.
Girl From Homer Talks: Interviewing Sarah Palin's least-favorite blogger.
Homosexuality Not Spoken Here: Two gay men kicked out of a taco joint for kissing.
Incredibly Preventable: Man gored to death in the running of the bulls.
Just Wait 'Till Next Yea—D'oh!: Chase won't pay for next year's fireworks.
Kids Get Shot By Government: U.S. to vaccinate millions against swine flu.
"Let's Make This More Ineffective": Conservative Democrats want to pull back on health care.
Meh. Who Needs 'Em?: King county could cut programs like pandemic flu health services.
Naturally Dry: Pacific Northwest rains might be migrating north.
OK! It's time for Your Daily Muppet:
Plus, because it's my last day on The Morning News for a while, and also because I'm hosting tonight's midnight showing of Muppet Treasure Island at the Egyptian, here is Your Bonus Muppet (dedicated to Scary Tyler Moore):