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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Theater God Save the Queen

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Tue, Jun 9, 2009 at 9:29 AM

35c7/1244566075-snapshot_2009-06-09_09-47-21.jpg

There were lots of good performances at last weekend's Northwest New Works—gale-force dancing by Ellie Sandstrom's new company, Byron au Yong's solo operetta about a Chinese deliveryman stuck in an elevator, a gorgeous and sad little love dance by Umami Performance—but the weekend only delivered one real shock, by the queen of shock herself: Queen Shmooquan.

I thought I was immune to Shmooquan's shtick. (If you've seen one act wearing fake cock-and-balls while regurgitating Twinkies into rubber chickens, you've seen 'em all.)

I was prepared feel totally indifferent to the Queen—despite her dramatic debut—but she dragged me, kicking and screaming, into a new-found, grudging admiration.

The poultry and penises were in full effect, but the Queen revealed new depths of flagrant, pop-culture weirdness—she might be a long-lost heir to Dina Martina and Klaus Nomi. She stuffed her stuffed her crotch with... something and stuffed her performance with exquisitely surreal video (Mr. Rogers, cheesy hand-holding on the beach, kaleidoscopic underwear) and surrealer antics: She rode a bicycle, danced on roller skates, and smeared her face with lipstick before chewing off the tip and swallowing it. At one point, the audience applauded her for simply eating a Dorito.

Shmooquan's heart beats pure entertainment—glittery, gaudy, and shameless.

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nsfw nsfw nsfw nsfw

Posted by happy renter on June 9, 2009 at 9:37 AM

We mean it, mannnnnnnn!!!

Posted by disintegrator

on June 9, 2009 at 9:39 AM

Sorry. I forget about workplace safety.

Posted by Brendan Kiley on June 9, 2009 at 9:46 AM

If only I had read the NSFW comments first I wouldnt being having to explain that to my new trainee... thanks Brendan

Posted by Tina on June 9, 2009 at 9:53 AM

her eating-a-dorito bit is my favorite part of her act.

Posted by paulus on June 9, 2009 at 9:54 AM

God Save Us From the Queen

There, I fixed it for you.

Posted by Chris B on June 9, 2009 at 10:02 AM

Her gong at the first Stranger Gong Show remains one of life's great injustices.

Posted by Fnarf

on June 9, 2009 at 10:10 AM

Thank you for sitting through that excruciating-sounding preview of Hell so that no one else had to.

Posted by sweet Jesus, they don't pay you enough on June 9, 2009 at 10:12 AM

We need to absorb the lessons of the Trachtenberg Family tragedy! Queen Shmooquan will belong to the world one day. We need to appreciate her here at home before she launches into the stratosphere.

Posted by Gurldoggie

on June 9, 2009 at 10:20 AM

What if we launched her ourselves?

Surely NASA has some surplus Saturn Vs lying around!

Posted by Chris B on June 9, 2009 at 10:26 AM

Yeah, I'm gonna pass.

Posted by Greg on June 9, 2009 at 10:49 AM

She needs a better publicist. I always seem to hear about her after the fact...

Posted by TheMisanthrope on June 9, 2009 at 11:19 AM

I <3 Jeppa.

Posted by roddy bottum on June 9, 2009 at 11:20 AM

I wonder what she's like in the sack.

Posted by Juris on June 9, 2009 at 12:21 PM

Hi, this is the queen's "publicist" - She will be performing Saturday at the Old Rainier Brewery in SODO. Doors at 9. Enter near the loading dock off of airport. Music and life sized origami too. 5 bucks.

Posted by repetitive stress on June 9, 2009 at 10:45 PM

Queen Smooquan, I'm proud to say, is my lovely daughter. She is the product of a father (Bi-Polar), served our country proudly in the US Coast Guard (PTSD)[won't go there]. Her mother is nuts too. Raised Jeppa & her bro. as single parent. Boy, what a ride! She is descended from a long line of creative nuts, (MORMON) in Utah. Near BYU. Jep and her Bro always relied upon each other - partially raised ea. other - when Dad was sick. Jeppa has done well, she's a "Sweet Spirit", Independent, self-reliant, and most of all, kind. I love her dearly. She has made my life worthwhile. So...Buy Her Stuff! If'n ya' don't, I know where you live, I'll find you, And make you pay. But of course you"ll get the product. (she has to eat to you know)

Love, Dad

Posted by Dad on June 14, 2009 at 5:47 PM