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News & ArtsThursday, June 4, 2009
Savage Love Savage Love Letter of the Day
Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Jun 4, 2009 at 2:30 PM
David Carradine? Erotic asphyxiation? Am I the only one thinking this, Dan?Jill G.
Nope.
2
Even if we're thinking it, let's not say it. He was 72 years old; it's just mean and disrespectful to titter and giggle about the means of his death.
11
The maid who found him said the other end of the curtain lines were tied around his penis, this was reported in some UK tabs, but not repeated in the "respectable" media in the US.
13
When NPR mentioned that cords were wound around his neck and, quote, "other" body parts, I cocked my eye a little.
14
Yeah. I think a lot of people heard "found dead in a hotel room in Thailand" and came to the non-suicidal conclusion. Seems likely, and somehow less sad.
15
Yup yup yup definitely death by unsupervised narnia-inspired autosexualadventurization. Definitely.
And @2, I fully agree with @4. I prefer to think Bill offed himself by mistake rather than by deliberate design.
And @2, I fully agree with @4. I prefer to think Bill offed himself by mistake rather than by deliberate design.
16
I think this about settles it:
Chuck Binder, his personal spokesperson, described his death as 'accidental'.
...
He said Carradine's body was naked when it was found and there were no signs of any other people in the room. The rope was around his neck and parts of his body, police were quoted as saying.
Chuck Binder, his personal spokesperson, described his death as 'accidental'.
...
He said Carradine's body was naked when it was found and there were no signs of any other people in the room. The rope was around his neck and parts of his body, police were quoted as saying.
21
I wonder if a mandrake will grow in the wardrobe where his semen fell. Then the wardrobe will open up as a magic gate to the land of Narnia. Well done Grasshopper.
In all seriousness, RIP David Carradine.
In all seriousness, RIP David Carradine.
22
@2 When I'm 72 I hope I have all the same robust sexual desires that I've had my whole life... and it's not mean to think of an older person as sexual... perhaps he survived decades of this practice without slipping up, until now...
23
Solitary autoerotic sex can be dangerous - I'm concerned that some impressionable types could get into trouble when the truth finally circulates and they try to emulate someone as well known as David Carradine - without the proper failsafes. But I agree about the sexuality of our older citizens - yowza.
24
Dangerous masturbation. And why, when he had such easy access to cheap whores who could ease off once his eyes rolled back in his head?
Sad.
Sad.
25
Damn, you'd think he could find a willing prostitute in Bangkok to choke him if he wanted.
*sigh* Joking aside, he was a pretty cool guy. RIP, "Bill".
*sigh* Joking aside, he was a pretty cool guy. RIP, "Bill".
27
Um, @26, I got it off the BBC. Their early article didn't mention "body parts" or "other areas". It said "genitals" this morning.
28
Wasn't he a Buddhist or something? If he was I doubt he was engaging in freak sex.
Farewell grasshopper.
Farewell grasshopper.
30
@17 Because penises are dirty filthy things and even just hearing the word will do irreparable harm to children who will then grow up to be whores, drug addicts, and politicians?
31
Wow, I find it surprising that LC doesn't condemn this but does condemn same-sex marriage equality.
Better dead than equal, LC? That makes you less than human and less than worthless.
Better dead than equal, LC? That makes you less than human and less than worthless.
32
Last year Carradine was in a movie called "My Suicide." The movie he was filming at the time of his death was called "Stretch." Shame on me for noticing this.
33
Suz, sexual attachments defeat the purpose of the eradication of all suffering according to Buddhist ethics. Look up the five precepts and the eightfold path. And the Buddha stated clearly that both monks and nuns and laypersons should refrain from committing sexual misconduct. I think 'erotic asphyxiation' qualifies as a sexual misconduct.
34
LC, that's like saying Catholic priests never have sex with boys. Because it's against their religion, doncha know. They're also not supposed to have abortions or premarital sex, and yet they do seem to indulge in those as well.
35
@28 & 33 Because all religious people follow all of the precepts of their religion at all times? And nobody ever gives in to temptation? This man's religion has zero to do with the likelihood that he died from autoerotic asphyxiation.
36
And for the record, while it is a tragedy, I'm with @4 on this one. There are worse ways to go, and he was probably quite happy at the time. Of course it's an embarrassing way to die, and there will be jokes... but when it comes down to it, not a bad way to go.
Admittedly, I'm looking at this purely from his perspective and not that of his family. Totally different take from their perspective.
Admittedly, I'm looking at this purely from his perspective and not that of his family. Totally different take from their perspective.
37
So as a buddhist auto-erotic asphyxiation is strictly forbidden so that couldn't possibly be the cause of death? Therefore it must be suicide on which the buddha is peachy-keen?
38
Spankin to the Grave, the newsletter for The National Erotic Asphyxiation Association affirms their motto has always been:
"You can have my genitalia when you pry 'em from my cold hands."
"You can have my genitalia when you pry 'em from my cold hands."
39
..."cold, dead hands" yadda...
because that clarification makes the sentiment so much less wrong.
40
Perhaps, Buddhist precepts are used differently than say scripture from the Bible when being observed for daily conduct and actions.
Buddhist Sexual Ethics
by Winton Higgins
Buddhist Sexual Ethics
Religious traditions help us to find our basic orientations in many aspects of our lives. The most important aspect of our lives is how we interact with others. Among other things, this means religions often have a lot to say about sexual ethics. What sexual ethics does Buddhism promote? In this area our tradition speaks more quietly than others, which can leave newcomers wondering if it addresses the subject at all. In fact it speaks quite firmly. In opening up the subject I'll highlight those questions that bear on the issues raised by various liberation movements - by the women's movement, by gays and lesbians, and by the smaller sexual minorities. I don't think I could be too wide off the mark in saying that all these movements whatever else they are about, are engaging with various forms of prejudice, and with violence and violations based on those prejudices.
Prejudices against women and against sexual minorities are usually reinforced by certain standard features of social psychology, such as intolerance of difference and the often deep-seated insecurities of those who regard themselves as 'normal' but aren't quite sure. An important ingredient in this nasty little cocktail, however, is various forms of prejudice, inhibition and repression associated with theistic religious fundamentalism.
Like all religions, Buddhism takes a strong ethical stand in human affairs and sexual behaviour in particular. The most common formulation of Buddhist ethics are the five precents:
I undertake the training precept of:
1. Refraining from harming living beings/practising loving kindness
2. Refraining from taking the non-given/practising generosity
3. Refraining from committing sexual misconduct/practising contentment
4. Refraining from false speech/practising truthful communication
5. Refraining from intoxicants/practising mindfulness.
These precepts take the form of voluntary, personal undertakings. They are not commandments; there is no god in Buddhism, so none to issue any.
The precepts express basic principles rather than fixed, legalistic rules that any one action falls inside or outside of. Like any non-fundamentalist ethical system, Buddhism provides us with general guiding principles while in no way relieving us of the obligation to make appropriate moral judgements in each morally significant situation we come across. Moral judgement is never a question of blindly applying a rule.
The five precepts constitute an integrated set - each precept supports the others. To know what 'sexual misconduct' means you look at the other precepts. 'Sexual misconduct', in the spirit of the precepts as a job lot, means any sexual conduct involving violence, manipulation or deceit - conduct that therefore leads to suffering and trouble. By contrast good sexual conduct is based on loving kindness, generosity, honesty, and mental and emotional clarity - conduct that has good results.
More...
Buddhist Sexual Ethics
by Winton Higgins
Buddhist Sexual Ethics
Religious traditions help us to find our basic orientations in many aspects of our lives. The most important aspect of our lives is how we interact with others. Among other things, this means religions often have a lot to say about sexual ethics. What sexual ethics does Buddhism promote? In this area our tradition speaks more quietly than others, which can leave newcomers wondering if it addresses the subject at all. In fact it speaks quite firmly. In opening up the subject I'll highlight those questions that bear on the issues raised by various liberation movements - by the women's movement, by gays and lesbians, and by the smaller sexual minorities. I don't think I could be too wide off the mark in saying that all these movements whatever else they are about, are engaging with various forms of prejudice, and with violence and violations based on those prejudices.
Prejudices against women and against sexual minorities are usually reinforced by certain standard features of social psychology, such as intolerance of difference and the often deep-seated insecurities of those who regard themselves as 'normal' but aren't quite sure. An important ingredient in this nasty little cocktail, however, is various forms of prejudice, inhibition and repression associated with theistic religious fundamentalism.
Like all religions, Buddhism takes a strong ethical stand in human affairs and sexual behaviour in particular. The most common formulation of Buddhist ethics are the five precents:
I undertake the training precept of:
1. Refraining from harming living beings/practising loving kindness
2. Refraining from taking the non-given/practising generosity
3. Refraining from committing sexual misconduct/practising contentment
4. Refraining from false speech/practising truthful communication
5. Refraining from intoxicants/practising mindfulness.
These precepts take the form of voluntary, personal undertakings. They are not commandments; there is no god in Buddhism, so none to issue any.
The precepts express basic principles rather than fixed, legalistic rules that any one action falls inside or outside of. Like any non-fundamentalist ethical system, Buddhism provides us with general guiding principles while in no way relieving us of the obligation to make appropriate moral judgements in each morally significant situation we come across. Moral judgement is never a question of blindly applying a rule.
The five precepts constitute an integrated set - each precept supports the others. To know what 'sexual misconduct' means you look at the other precepts. 'Sexual misconduct', in the spirit of the precepts as a job lot, means any sexual conduct involving violence, manipulation or deceit - conduct that therefore leads to suffering and trouble. By contrast good sexual conduct is based on loving kindness, generosity, honesty, and mental and emotional clarity - conduct that has good results.
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