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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

With a Unitard You Need to Wear a Purity Cock Ring, Joe

Posted by Dan Savage on Wed, Jun 3, 2009 at 4:53 PM

"I don't get this," says Slog tipper Hannah, "but that kid's thighs are UNREAL. And the high heels are a nice touch."

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Comments (30) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
Meags 1
Is he the cute one? I only ask because I feel weird inside.
Posted by Meags on June 3, 2009 at 5:07 PM
Y.F. Redux 2
Well, there's a joke here about the Jonas brothers saddlebacking for sure.
Posted by Y.F. Redux on June 3, 2009 at 5:11 PM
Jocelyn 3
Holy shit, Dan. You just somehow made me like a Jonas Brother. I hate you.
Posted by Jocelyn http://wtfwjdbitch.blogspot.com on June 3, 2009 at 5:13 PM
Sweeney Agonistes 4
I knew Beyonce, and you, sir, are no Beyonce.
Posted by Sweeney Agonistes on June 3, 2009 at 5:33 PM
Posted by chrisindri on June 3, 2009 at 5:46 PM
Julie in Eugene 6
Did we need another Single Ladies parody? I think we did not.
Posted by Julie in Eugene on June 3, 2009 at 5:46 PM
7
i'm with 6. single ladies has been done. at this point i can't help but feel like it's a parody of a parody of a parody and i'm bored.
Posted by franky on June 3, 2009 at 6:03 PM
8
You'd think he'd be better at dancing around and lip synching.
Posted by PopsicleMud on June 3, 2009 at 6:07 PM
Reverse Polarity 9
If not for the novelty of this being a Jonas Brother, this would be lame. It's been done much better by lots of other people. With their resources, you'd think they could at least have better production values.

Still, I never would have thought to see a Jonas Brother in tights and heels. I actually hate them slightly less than I did five minutes ago.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on June 3, 2009 at 6:29 PM
10
he's cute, but he coulda used a choreographer.
Posted by ellarosa on June 3, 2009 at 7:15 PM
11
I think his appaling inability to dance shows that the rumours about his sexuality are effectively dismissable.

No gay man (out or closeted) dances THAT badly.
Posted by Malcolm in Sydney on June 3, 2009 at 7:17 PM
kim in portland 12
This made me laugh. Yes, he could of used a choreographer. The heels are a nice touch, too.
Posted by kim in portland http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPpCxY05dqs on June 3, 2009 at 8:27 PM
13
@ 11, I beg to differ; I'm very very gay, and can't dance to save my life!
Posted by PDX_Paulie on June 3, 2009 at 8:28 PM
Bauhaus I 14
More Disney strategy at play.

They didn't make this video for for the young female 'tweens. They made this video to spark some gay interest in the Jonas Brothers whose numbers have been slipping lately (their TV show didn't attract near the numbers they thought it would). And it worked.

It caught the eye on one Mr. Dan Savage.
Posted by Bauhaus I on June 3, 2009 at 8:29 PM
very bad homo 15
I think most of you are missing the point.
Doing it badly is what makes it so funny.
Posted by very bad homo on June 3, 2009 at 8:50 PM
16
I'm not a fan of the Jonas Brothers but for some reason I do love that song. It's my favorite to dance to at the gay bars in downtown Austin. I think the best youtube parody/omage to the original video is Shane Mercado.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=cha…
Posted by Laura D on June 3, 2009 at 11:24 PM
17
I couldn't get through the first minute. My embarrassment for him was searing. This video was made nearly a year too late. Chelsea Handler is going to have a field day.

Re: the dancing, it looked to me like he was repressing an inner drag queen that knows the song by heart and would have rocked the shit outta it in this video. If only he let her loose.
Posted by Judith on June 3, 2009 at 11:37 PM
18
wow. I was actually embarrassed FOR him - not in the obvious way - ooh look at the dude being coursed into doing this dance in tights.... But in the way that he so obviously has no sense of humor, and couldn't pull it off to save his (all be it adorable) life.
Posted by cc on June 4, 2009 at 12:41 AM
19
....sorry, one last thing - the only thing I know about the Jo Bros- is the article I read in Seventeen magazine a couple of weeks ago in planned parent hood - as I was walking outta there pockets fulla condoms. it was actually an awesome experience - just cause PP is amazing.
Posted by cc on June 4, 2009 at 12:45 AM
seattlejenny 20
i love the title!
did you already cover the jonas brothers pledge to virginity?
those poor boys will look back on these years and regret until the end of their days.
Posted by seattlejenny on June 4, 2009 at 12:46 AM
Uriel-238 21
Is there an inside joke here that I in my neutron-like density am completely missing?
Posted by Uriel-238 on June 4, 2009 at 4:51 AM
22
The Unitard is probably the least embarrassing thing Joe Jonas has worn.
Posted by Lawrence on June 4, 2009 at 5:45 AM
bucket 23
Pee Wee Herman did it better in white platform shoes. Tequila!
Posted by bucket on June 4, 2009 at 7:13 AM
24
It make my 'giney tingle.
Posted by Cartman on June 4, 2009 at 7:40 AM
25
So the original video is three women. What, the other Jonas Brothers were too chicken? Did this one lose a bet? Would have been better if they'd all three done it and at least appeared to have spent some time learning the dance.

That said, I was mildy charmed by it, and I had no prior opinion of the Jonas Brothers, except I knew they were virginity-pushers and that's kind of icky.
Posted by Christy O on June 4, 2009 at 8:11 AM
cedarthvader 26
I had to go on Wikipedia to make sure he was 18. Thusly confirmed I can safely say he has a realllly nice body, despite being part of a painfully lame pop machine.
Posted by cedarthvader on June 4, 2009 at 8:47 AM
27
Damn you, Dan! You just gave me a unitard fetish. And omg, that guy's legs are FAB! I think he's definitely enjoying it a lot more than he's letting on. He's definitely more coordinated than he's pretending to be.
Posted by hlr on June 4, 2009 at 9:30 AM
Carollani 28
I wish he had learned the song. His body is amazing.
Posted by Carollani http://www.carollani.com/wordpress on June 4, 2009 at 10:31 AM
29
@13 I didn't say a gay can couldn't dance that badly, I said no gay man Dances that badly.

The gay boys I know (including the one I sleep with every night) who can't dance DON'T dance.

Just like you (I hope).

Young Mr Jonas' willingness to dance appallingly shows his straightness IMHO.
Posted by Malcolm in Sydney on June 4, 2009 at 8:59 PM
30
Joe's got some guts, i'll give him that; not so sure he actually pulled this one off though
Posted by coffeenomad http://www.coffeenomad.com on June 9, 2009 at 1:06 PM

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