Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Last Gay Post of the Day

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 9:02 PM

Many hundred people converged in Westlake Park a few hours ago to shake their fists at the California Supreme Court for upholding Prop 8. It was weird, though, because folks looked pretty happy. Except this guy, who looked like he was ready to make some Spotted Owl bisque:

acbb/1243395518-flag_man.jpg

He's Karl Derrick, and he's not mean at all. "The left doesn't often use the American flag," he said. "Too often it's waved to represent the bludgeoning end of America." Indeed. This next picture was taken by Nic Launceford on Flickr:

8ee2/1243395944-nic_launceford_on_flickr.jpg

Here is state Senator Ed Murray, begging the massive gaggle to get off their metropolitan asses and organize outside the sequined walls of Capitol Hill:

2530/1243397806-murray_and_pedersen.jpg

Behind him to the left—Murray's right—is Representative Jamie Pedersen, who looks like an angel. And not one of those chubby little Rococo angels. A tiny little Lutheran angel. "Referendum 71 is a blessing in disguise," he says.

Their Own Worst Enemies

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 7:27 PM

You may remember how sponsors of Referendum 71 whined two weeks ago that Governor Christine Gregoire was delaying their campaign by not signing the domestic-partnership bill into law. "Each day they have delayed signing the legislation is one less day we have for signature gathering. I'm certain they are aware of that," wrote campaign spokesman Gary Randall.

But who are they going to blame for the delay now?

This afternoon Larry Stickney, the campaign's other ringleader, filed a challenge to the ballot title of Referendum 71 in Thurston County Superior Court. May 29 would be the soonest date for a court hearing, says Secretary of State spokesman David Ammons, but June 5 or June 12 would be more likely. In other words, by filing this complaint, Stickney is losing up to 18 days to gather signatures. That would leave him only six weeks before the July 25 deadline to print petitions and gather 120,000 signatures.

According to the court file, Stickney wants the ballot question (as proposed by state Attorney General Rob McKenna) changed from this:

This bill would expand the rights, responsibilities, and obligations accorded state-registered same-sex and senior domestic partners to be equivalent to those of married spouses, except that a domestic partnership is not a marriage.

Should this bill be:

Approved ___
Rejected ___

...to this:

This bill would expand the rights, responsibilities, and obligations accorded state-registered same-sex and senior domestic partners to be equal to the rights, responsibilities, and obligations of married couples, except that domestic partnerships shall not be called marriage.

Should this bill be:

Approved ___
Rejected ___

So is a domestic partnership actually marriage but not called marriage, as Stickney argues? Or is it not marriage, as the original language suggests, because it's not actually a marriage? God only knows what Judge Thomas McPhee will say about the wording—whenever he gets around to the case, that is—but he may be unimpressed with one of the words in the complaint. Stickney's lawyer four times misspells the state Attorney General's last name as "McKinna."

Wait... Did We Win Today In California?

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 6:48 PM

Some people think we did. A reader of Sullivan's describes today's ruling as "a blockbuster pro-gay-rights decision," and Seneca Doane at Daily Kos writes...

In last year's landmark 4-3 decision, In re Marriage Cases, the California Supreme Court decided that same-sex couples have a fundamental right under state law to every single advantage that heterosexual couples do, including the right to call their legal union "marriage."

Today, the court unanimously upheld the substantive fundamental right. Liberal to conservative, they all now accept it. They construed Prop 8 as narrowly as possible: as a initiative that addressed what we would label these relationships that we normally call marriage. The voters said that we can't call these relationships "marriage" when they involve same-sex couples. That's an insult to gays and lesbians and I hope and believe that it will not last. But note what this does not say.

Go read the whole thing.

"I haven't even showered yet because I DIDN'T WANT TO WASH OFF THE FUN RESIDUE"

Posted by Christopher Frizzelle on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 6:10 PM

b631/1243386552-lindywestdrawing.jpg

Lindy West recaps her weekend at the Gorge, asks a question about Dave Navarro, and explains what those arrows symbolize.

Monkey-Eating Eagle!

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 5:45 PM

Via Weird Universe, here is video of the Philippine Monkey-Eating Eagle. Even though this bird can eat whole fucking monkeys, it is for some reason endangered:

Follow the above link to see video of a Monkey-Eating Eagle, completely unprovoked, attacking a boy on the beach. What an asshole the Philippine Monkey-Eating Eagle is.

Big Crowd in Westlake

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 5:44 PM

ed83/1243385427-westlakenow.jpg

Very big crowd, some of of the usual protest/rally suspects, but way more young people, and lots of people that have become active in the movement since the Prop 8 decision last November. We are winning.

Get Your Gay (or Gay-Friendly) Ass to Westlake

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:51 PM

I'm buying the first round of drinks!

Okay, okay, okay. I know folks are dejected about the California Supreme Court upholding a bigoted initiative. Who the fuck are they to decide Prop 8 was consitutional? Well... they are California's supreme court, but still! And I know that some people have doubts about the difference a protest makes. There's no tangible result from holding a rally. On the other hand, there's no tangible result from writing, blogging, reading and creating progressive media, symbolic legislation, and lots of other tactics that have advanced every progressive movement that's ever moved.

Folks had the same doubts about the civil-rights marches, women's-rights marches, bus boycotts, gay pride parades, the anti-war protests... Some of them made no difference; some of them were little components of huge movements. You don't always know which actions are the conduits for change. But virtually every successful civil rights movement has, in part, been bolstered by marches and rallies. It's incorrect to discount their value just because we can't determine a direct causality between the protesting and changing the law. The only direct causalities in law are votes and rulings. But no one would say that political and social forces don't shape those votes and decisions. So get your ass to Westlake. The event starts at 5:30 p.m. You'll at least see me and Savage there.

Also, if you want a correlation between marches and laws, here's one: After Prop 8 passed, we marched and rallied. Boy were we pissed. A few months later, Senator Murray and Representative Jamie Pedersen decided to push through a final domestic-partnership bill, one that contained all the remaining rights of marriage—several years earlier than expected. And now we have a new organization beating down the bigots behind Referendum 71. It's a slow trudge, but it's fun. And there are drinks afterward.

6f56/1243381023-dayofdecision.jpg

Hollywood Is Stupid

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:47 PM

1.) Hey, I haven't written about that shitty new Terminator movie in almost four days! I got into an argument with a friend on Friday night about which one was worse: Terminator 3 or Terminator 4. I still think this newest one is the worst, and this interview with McG really points out why it's so awful: Because McG has no fucking clue how to make a movie. His original ending, and the one that's still obviously his preferred ending, involved killing the entire cast:

...he shoots everybody in the room. Fade to black. End of movie. Skynet wins. F—- you!

I swear to God McG must be a thirteen year old boy.

2.) Topless Robot says that they're remaking the movie version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Yes, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie that was a major flop until Joss Whedon remade it into a Buffy the Vampire Slayer TV series (a series that really was one of the best TV shows of all time). They're going to remake that movie. Without any of the actors who appeared in either of the Buffy the Vampire Slayers, and without Joss Whedon's involvement. All this needs to become the dumbest movie of all time is McG at the helm. Get on it, Hollywood.

How to Cook a Wolf?

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:46 PM

How to cook a rat!

Thx, Nipper.

The Greatest?

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:32 PM

Alice Munro has bested V.S. Naipaul, Peter Carey, James Kelman and 14 other writers in a "clash of the world's literary giants" to win the Man Booker International Prize. She is pretty great, isn't she?

A New "Between Two Ferns"!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:31 PM

I am getting so good at posting these "Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis" video shorts that I don't even have to check the spelling of his name! BTW, if you're waiting for these things to stop being funny, you're going to be sorely disappointed by this outing co-starring Bradley Cooper and a very special surprise guest!

Who’s Going to Challenge Referendum 71?

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:27 PM

A handful of groups advocating for marriage-equality have just announced that they won’t file a challenge of the ballot title of Referendum 71. The tactic would have eaten up time for opponents to gather signatures for the petition, which would slim the chances that the referendum could even make it on the ballot.

“After we looked very carefully at what the attorney general’s office had drafted … we concluded that the ballot title accurately reflects what the domestic-partnership bill does,” says Lisa Stone, a spokeswomen for Washington Families Standing Together, the newly formed organization fighting to uphold the bill. The recommendation to avoid a challenge came from the ACLU of Washington and Legal Voice (Stone is also the director of Legal Voice). She says that challenging the language simply to defeat the measures could elicit a negative public reaction. “We like to be sure that we are acting as ethically as we can,” she says.

The deadline to challenge the ballot title in Thurston County Superior Court is today at 5p.m.

However, someone else could still challenge the ballot title.

In fact, rumors have surfaced that Protect Marriage Washington (PMW), the group of bigots sponsoring Referendum 71, will file the challenge itself. PMW spokesman Gary Randall did not immediately return calls to comment. And it’s unclear how PMW would seek to improve the wording of the petition, but the strategy could backfire.

Dave Ammons, a spokesman for the Secretary of State's office, said last week that a judge could hear the case as soon as this Friday. “But June 5 or June 12 would be more likely," he says. PMW would then be left with as few as 43 days to print petitions and collect the 120,577 required to make the November ballot.

Stone says Washington Families Standing Together could then go to court to keep the wording. “We will look very carefully at what they are proposing and determine if we need to intervene,” she says.

Huge Leather Bars and Homemade Peanut Butter Cookies

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 4:26 PM

Back in February Sally Kern, Oklahoma's infamously bigoted state representative, spoke at a John Birch Society conference. (Who knew they were still meeting?) Kern called for a second "Great Awakening" to confront the growing homosexual menace. The gays, according to Sally, had a secret plan ("The Protocols of the Elders of West Hollywood") to convince the world that homosexuality is a "superior lifestyle." Sally warned the Birchers—who we came this close to flipping—not to be fooled by our nefarious themes:

"You know, I've done a lot of reading on this. I wish I could describe to you their behavior. I will not because I would be redder than this suit.... The theme of equality and freedom is the approach that the homosexuals are using today—totally perverting the true intention of what our Constitution meant. The homosexuals get it—it's a struggle between our religious freedoms and their right to do what they want to do."

The masses, Sally went on, would be "shocked and repelled" if prematurely exposed (?) to the depraved behaviors we gays get up to—behaviors that everyone will apparently be obligated to engage in once we've convinced the world of the superiority of the homosexual lifestyle.

My first impulse upon reading Sally's comments—way back in February—was to take a picture of this plate of cookies on my kitchen counter when I got home from work:

d2fc/1243369781-cookiesandleather.jpg

I had hoped to get a picture of a plate full of cookies, and this plate was full when I left for work. But the boyfriend and the kid and the kid's friends had been at the cookies all day and there were just two left—two the boyfriend saved for me—when I got home. I baked those cookies myself and from scratch. Baking is something I enjoy doing for my family and I guess you could call it a depraved behavior, carb-wise. (I'd go so far as to describe my baking as a depraved cycle of self-abuse: bake delicious cookies, eat delicious cookies, feel fat, hit the gym... bake delicious cookies, eat delicious cookies, feel fat, go to the gym...) But I took the picture tp refute Kern's charges of depravity. I was going to post this picture and say, "Is this the kind of depraved behavior that you meant, Sally? Baking cookies for your family?"

It's the same reaction most of us 'mos have when a right-wing bigot drops dark hints about our depraved lifestyles and all the top-secret sex stuff we get down to when no one is watching. (You can see video and photos of all this top-secret sex stuff at XTube and on various Christian websites.) It's a knee-jerk, defensive response, and when it doesn't take the form of a photo of plate of cookies it's usually expressed like this: "Hey, we're not so different! We go to work, we pay our taxes, we take care of our families, we even bake cookies—what's so depraved about all of that?"

But you know what? We are different, we gay people. If I may generalize: gay people tend to have more interesting sex lives than straight people—the kinds of sex lives that scare dumb bigots who're afraid of their own genitalia. We bake cookies (see above), we go to work, we take care of our families, we pay our taxes. We do all of that. But we go in for a little "depravity" at slightly greater rates than straight people and with a lot less angst. We have this ability to let ourselves live a little. Once you've told your momma that you wanna kiss boys giving yourself or your partner permission to indulge in this, that, or the other kink isn't anywhere near as scary. Not remotely. So long as you're safe and sane about it, and indulge in moderation, where's the harm?

When Mrs. Kern fumes about depraved sex acts I can't help but thinking that Mr. Kern is jealous. He probably doesn't want to get it on with depraved gays—probably (you never know with the 'phobes)—but odds are high that Mr. Kern, like so many straight men out there, has "depraved" sexual interests and fantasies that he absolutely, positively can't share with his wife. Because according to her, kinks that turn your face (and other things red) are for homosexuals, not heterosexuals. Kinks define homosexuality, according to Mrs. Kern.

And isn't that too bad for those heterosexuals who buy into it? Gawd, it must suck to be married to someone who views anything and everything that isn't vaginal intercourse as sinful and depraved. Don't get me wrong: I am not knocking vaginal intercourse. I'd dig it if I had a vagina or was attracted to people who do. But just one particular kind of sex with one not-very-indulgent person for ever and ever and ever? How depressing, how tedious. I'd hang myself.

Kern's comments came back to me late Saturday night while I was drinking a vodka & Red Bull in the lobby of a hotel in Chicago. The kid was spending the weekend with friends so the boyfriend and I headed to Chicago for International Mr. Leather, an annual contest/beauty pageant/dance party for the gay BDSM crowd. We're not interested in the pageant—we didn't know who won until we got home and looked at the website this morning (but congrats to Jeffrey Payne, Mr. Texas Leather and International Mr. Leather 2009)—and always assumed the event would bore us. But we have friends who go every year and they told us what a great scene it was—IML completely takes over a big downtown hotel every year and for three days turning it into the World's Biggest Leather Bar—so we went last year for the first time and such a blast that we were back again this year. This year's IML was at the Chicago Hilton and Towers on Michigan Avenue, which has a Belle Époque grandeur that provided the perfect backdrop for the decadent goings on. Forgive my bad cell phone picture of all the stunning men in the massive, ornate lobby...

b950/1243376898-lobbyimlhilton.jpg

My boyfriend's in that picture somewhere. And the dance party in the hotel ballroom—where Queen Elizabeth II dined on her first visit to the states as Queen—was amazing...

ac9c/1243377552-ballroomchandies.jpg

...but too darkly lit to make out much besides the chandeliers. To see the face of the person you were dancing with you needed to retire to the foyer...

e2be/1243377531-ballroomtwo.jpg

The leather market, where vendors were selling the sex toys and bondage gear and videos that so excite religious conservatives (but please, IML, just say NO to the lone pathetic vendor peddling revolting bestiality porn), was too brightly lit...

a507/1243378191-mrsbooth.jpg

And here's what made me think of Sally Kern: Everywhere we went at IML—an event held up by the Kerns of the world as evidence that gay people are too depraved for marriage and family life—we met gay couples, guys who had been together for five, ten years, and twenty years. Some couples were there to look, some were there to play, and some, like us, had left kids at home with sitters or friends or grandmas. Because there's nothing mutually exclusive about conspicuous displays of wholesome family values—like baking peanut butter cookies for your kids—and attending IML and indulging in the kinds of (preferably safe) sex acts that so shock and repel and redden the likes of Sally Kern.

Instead of pointing to our homemade cookies to refute Kern's charges of sexual "depravity"—my first impulse, so many months ago, when reading her comments—we 'mos should point to our cookies and our occasional wild weekends. Because we can do it all, Sally. We can have our homemade peanut butter cookies and our commitments and our family values and our sexual adventures too.

Eat your heart out, bitch.

You Really Should Go See Mary Oliver Tonight

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 3:47 PM

This morning, I gave away a pair of tickets to go see Mary Oliver tonight at Benaroya Hall at 8 pm. Actually, thanks to the generosity of the good folks at Northwest Associated Arts, I gave away pairs of tickets to the first four people who responded to the post. Congratulations to Nora, LeeAnn, Rachel, and Melanie.

There are still tickets available, though, and you should go to see Mary Oliver read. Here's a pretty great poem by her for you to enjoy:

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting—
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

There are a few more available online here. (I especially like "The Journey," which was a little too long to post on Slog.)

And, because I am apparently in a mood to dispense poetry on the internets today, yesterday I rediscovered one of my favorite poems ever. It's by Jim Dodge and it's titled "Unnatural Selections: A Meditation upon Witnessing a Bullfrog Fucking a Rock." You should read it.

Do We, Robert?

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 3:42 PM

Ugh:

Do we know where the president stands? Really? I am really getting sick of watching Robert Gibbs shrug and grimace his way through questions about gay rights and marriage equality and DADT. This is "fierce advocacy"?

"'World's Most Litigious Man' Suing Guinness"

Posted by David Schmader on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 3:32 PM

32a5/1243376988-picture_2.png

You think it's The Onion, but no, it's ABC News.

Blind Woman Bus Attack: The Video

Posted by David Schmader on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 3:15 PM

It's a story that's been covered virtually in full in Last Days, from the instigating incident of the blind woman randomly attacked by a fellow passenger on a Metro bus to Hot Tipper Oscar's receipt of a meritorious service award for his help in subduing the attacker.

But only yesterday did I get to see the video, which was included in an ABC News "Caught on Camera" broadcast segment.

Full disclosure: The video is disturbing, and you'll learn nothing from watching it except how abrupt and awful random violence can be. That's not quite true: You'll also get to see people rushing in to help, which is great. But don't say you weren't warned.

Canadian Governor General Helps Gut Seal, Eats Raw Heart

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 3:12 PM

Is this as terrible as it sounds? She did it using a traditional Inuit knife to show her support for Inuit seal hunters, expressing "her dismay that anyone would call their eons-old, traditional hunting practices inhumane" per the Toronto Star. The E.U. wants to ban seal products, which would make these very poor native people even poorer. They've been living off seal killing since before god, and "they don't use the hooked hakapiks that have faced such bitter criticism from environmentalists...they use guns or harpoons, and can't understand why their industry is considered less humane than cattle farming." Cannot they continue?

These Are My People

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 2:45 PM

A recent study has proven that people who work in the publishing industry are the biggest professional drunks of them all. Thanks, science!

On a completely unrelated note, I am going to Book Expo America, the annual publishing-industry-wide meetup, in New York City this weekend, and I will be Slogging about it on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. This will be an entirely professional engagement and I will surely not be drinking at all.

Currently Hanging

Posted by Jen Graves on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 2:32 PM

New economy art.

e964/1243274461-bunting_1.jpgBuddy Bunting, Walmart Distribution Center (2008), ink and pencil on paper, 20 by 26 inches

I Saw It: The Yes Men Fix the World

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 1:54 PM

Last weekend, I watched The Yes Men Fix the World at SIFF. It's the second documentary about the Yes Men, who are anti-corporate activists who speak at business conferences and pull hoaxes that satirize immoral corporate policy. I wholeheartedly confirm that David Schmader's review is right on. The thing that saves this movie from becoming a Michael Moore-style proselytizing headache is the Yes Men's commitment: They hang around long after things become awkward, and it's that Ricky Gervais-ish commitment to a joke, no matter how painful the experience becomes, that makes the movie work as a comedy.

Unfortunately, we in the theater only saw about ninety percent of the movie. The digital projection at the Neptune was beyond glitchy, skipping the picture around quite often and at times going completely black. The audience was surprisingly patient with the poor projection quality, but this is not making the case for digital projection. It's done at the festival, but The Yes Men Fix the World will probably come back to town for a week or two in the fall, and I'd advise you to see it—it works as both a comedy and as a documentary. Hopefully our local projectionists will have worked out the bugs by then.

Hot On the Heels of the Prop 8 Ruling

Posted by Sam Machkovech on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 1:41 PM

...comes an announcement from the guys behind Grand Theft Auto:

3919/1243369835-gta-gay.jpg

The newest add-on to GTA IV is titled "The Ballad of Gay Tony" and sees you playing as a bodyguard for a nightclub owner (the aforementioned Tony) in fictional Liberty City. I predict it'll turn out a mess. I fault the original GTA IV for its fruitily stereotyped gays and, worse, painting those characters as helpless, and I can't imagine Rockstar Games having a sudden editorial change of heart in time for this add-on's release in the fall for Xbox 360. At the very least, Microsoft can't be called out for banning the use of the word "gay" this time.

This Is Why They Call It Torture

Posted by David Schmader on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 1:34 PM

Chicago-based radio host Mancow Muller—who previously argued against defining the practice of water-boarding as "torture"—subjects himself to a water-boarding and learns a valuable lesson.

Thank you, Slog tipper Juli.

I Had Two Red Bull and Vodkas On Saturday Night...

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 1:01 PM

...and couldn't get to sleep. Maybe it was the cocaine?

Fuck a Kanye-Ism In the Eye

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, May 26, 2009 at 12:48 PM

7ad0/1243365967-collegedropout.jpgKanye West, who is "a proud non-reader," is publishing a book:

His book is 52 pages — some blank, others with just a few words — and offers his optimistic philosophy on life. One two-page section reads, "Life is 5% what happens and 95% how you react!" Another page reads "I hate the word hate!"...He calls his wisdom "Kanye-isms."

"My favorite one is 'Get used to being used,'" he said.

I can't believe I used to like this guy.

"Sometimes people write novels and they just be so wordy and so self-absorbed," West said. "I am not a fan of books. I would never want a book's autograph.

"I am a proud non-reader of books. I like to get information from doing stuff like actually talking to people and living real life," he said.

West wrote the not-even-52-page-long-book with the help of a ghost writer.

(Thanks to Slog tipper Jayme for the stomach-churning tip.)

@SEAshows

The Stranger's Twitter Feed of Seattle Shows
  • Loading Tweets
    loading

Follow @SEAshows
 

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC
1535 11th Ave (Third Floor), Seattle, WA 98122
Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use