Why do the best ones always leave us? A year ago or something, local comics Andy Haynes (dry) and Scott Moran (droll) packed up and headed off for New York City. Assholes! They're in town TONIGHT—along with Rory Scovel, who is a bizarre, funny madman—for one night at the Balagan (where booze is to be had!). You should go. Really. Comedy is good.

Balagan Theater, 1117 E Pike St, 8 pm