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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

TV Attention Fans of Pop-Culture Tragedy

Posted by on Tue, Apr 21, 2009 at 10:26 AM

The cast of NBC's upcoming I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!—a Survivor-meets-The Surreal Life reality competition—has been announced, and every name on the list deserves both bold type and an exclamation point. To wit:

Kooky-area-kid-made-okay-on-American Idol Sanjaya Malakar!
Psychotic '70s supermodel Janice Dickinson!
Fake reality stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt!
Celebrity bounty hunter/apologetic racist Duane "Dog" Chapman!
Ousted Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich!
Hinted-at-but-as-yet-unconfirmed: famously assaulted figure skater Nancy Kerrigan!

As for the show's goals and Blago's ongoing legal troubles (which hinder his ability to travel freely to foreign countries), NBC issued this statement:

“Ten celebrities of various backgrounds will be dropped into the heart of the Costa Rican jungle to face challenges designed to test their skills in adapting to the wilderness and to raise money for their favorite charities. Rod Blagojevich will be a participant on the show pending the court’s approval.”

The casting, filming, and airing of this show—which will be broadcast Mon-Thurs for four straight weeks in June—will almost certainly secure humanity's ultimate damnation, but if I get to watch, say, Sanjaya and Rod Blagojevich tunneling through dung together, it will be worth it.

Thank you for your help, Reality Blurred.

UPDATE: As Chicago Fan notes a few posts up, Rod Blagojevich has been denied permission to travel to Costa Rica to tunnel through dung on I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!

 

Comments (26) RSS

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1
This was all foretold in the Book of Revelations.

Read it again, people.
Posted by Ackham on April 21, 2009 at 10:36 AM
2
Holy Crap Jesus! I predict Sanjaya will win it all, and at some point will kill and eat Spencer and Heidi.
Posted by Fnarf on April 21, 2009 at 10:43 AM
3
Is anybody else thinking "international incident"?
Posted by CommonKnowledge on April 21, 2009 at 10:44 AM
4
I would pay many American dollars to not have to watch said show.
Posted by oh god on April 21, 2009 at 10:54 AM
5
Next season: Sarah Palin. Please, God.
Posted by Jocelyn on April 21, 2009 at 11:00 AM
6
I hate television.
Posted by m@ on April 21, 2009 at 11:02 AM
7
It truly is The End Times...

no talent yucks are one thing, but when you start celebrititizing CRIMINALS, accused or otherwise, that's setting a new low.
Posted by michael strangeways on April 21, 2009 at 11:03 AM
8
This just sounds dreadful. I'm so glad I got rid of cable.

Wait, it's on NBC? Fuuuuuuuuuuck...
Posted by Matt from Denver on April 21, 2009 at 11:07 AM
9
Oh, come on, Michael -- Heidi's pretty horrible, it's true, but I wouldn't call her a CRIMINAL.
Posted by Fnarf on April 21, 2009 at 11:09 AM
10
@7:

I suppose there's always a slim possibility one of the "criminals" will either be eaten by a large predator, or succumb to some fatal jungle malady - which would be about the only reason I can think of to watch this piece of drek.
Posted by COMTE on April 21, 2009 at 11:22 AM
11
Sigh. Blago will apparently NEVER stop embarrassing us Chicagoans. But at least he won't be running down our public streets in ill-fitting jogging attire while he's busy fighting Janice for hair product in the Costa Rican jungles.
Posted by Jake on April 21, 2009 at 11:27 AM
12
Blago denied bail. Who's Heidi Montag?
Posted by msmsms on April 21, 2009 at 11:28 AM
13
This is, like, a joke, right? Please?
Posted by Once I Was an Idol on April 21, 2009 at 11:29 AM
14
Too bad about Rod. I was curious to see how he would maintain his hair during his stay in the jungle.
Posted by monti on April 21, 2009 at 11:37 AM
15
Man, you people don't know how to have fun. This is going to be a GREAT program. Watching human refuse suffer stupidly in the jungle? It's like a dream come true!
Posted by Fnarf on April 21, 2009 at 11:46 AM
16
I'm waiting for the international sting operation where we get John Yoo and all the other Bush War Criminals to show up on a reality TV show ... that turns out to be War Crimes Trials at the ICC!

Man, can you imagine the look on their faces?
Posted by Will in Seattle on April 21, 2009 at 11:55 AM
17
this sounds fucking amazing. it stars world's first supermodel janice dickinson, and anything starring world's first supermodel janice dickinson has to be fucking amazing.
Posted by brandon on April 21, 2009 at 11:55 AM
18
Viewing parties at my house!
Posted by Original Monique on April 21, 2009 at 12:02 PM
19
Janice Dickinson was not a supermodel at all, let alone the "World's First". I'll go with Suzy Parker or Lisa Fonssagrives.
Posted by Fnarf on April 21, 2009 at 1:19 PM
20
Fnarf's right.
Posted by Will in Seattle on April 21, 2009 at 1:47 PM
21
whether or not she actually is the world's first supermodel is entirely beside the point. she just says she is, and that's a huge part of why she's so fucking amazing.

the rest of it is due to the episode of "surreal life" where she reduced bronson pinchot to a sobbing mess by shouting at him about her abusive father. quality television, people. she should have her own channel.
Posted by brandon on April 21, 2009 at 2:01 PM
22
Oh God Brandon, I'd forgotten about Janice decimating Bronson Pinchot. That was legitimately upsetting, which seems to be The Surreal Life's stock in trade. (See drunk-and-naked Verne Troyer urinating on the floor from the seat of his mini-scooter.)
Posted by David Schmader on April 21, 2009 at 2:07 PM
23
Oh, I'm sorry I missed that. I will concede that she is a nutter and likely to be a better addition to any show than any real supermodels.
Posted by Fnarf on April 21, 2009 at 2:32 PM
24
True. She gives good TV.
Posted by Will in Seattle on April 21, 2009 at 4:42 PM
25
this is solid gold. please do it.
Posted by owl power on April 21, 2009 at 7:05 PM
26
Needs to be a Last-One-Out-ALIVE sort of thingy.
Posted by that, I would watch on April 23, 2009 at 9:49 PM

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