Slog
News & ArtsTuesday, March 31, 2009
Life "See?"
Posted by David Schmader on Tue, Mar 31, 2009 at 3:20 PM
That's the text of an email just sent by my guy Jake—who lives in fear of sneezing while driving—along with this Associated Press report.
Sneezing fit causes driver to crash into Ore. home.Authorities said a sneezing fit caused 25-year-old Ramon Stephen Ayala to lose control of his vehicle Saturday and hit a home. Marion County Sheriff's Office Cmdr. Kevin Schultz said Ayala sneezed as he headed toward an intersection around 1 a.m. When he stopped sneezing, he had run a stop sign and tried to hit the brakes. But it was too late. Ayala's 2001 Volkswagen Jetta crashed into a corner of a house. Schultz said a shower wall and bathtub were damaged, but no injuries were reported and Ayala was not cited.
Dear Jake: I'm sorry for making light of what is clearly a very real danger.
4
@2, stopping the vehicle isn't usually an option on such short notice. Trying to change lanes and find a place to duck in while waiting for the explosion is probably even more dangerous than just carrying on and hoping it's no more than an eyeblink long.
5
I assume even with this rock-solid alibi the police still tested him for alcohol- last time I heard of someone driving into a house at 1am, it wasn't because of sneezing...
6
Huh. I'm a very violent, animated sneezer who often sneezes 5-7 times in a row many times a day. But the only thing I've ever feared while driving was the half-second intervals where I can't force myself to keep my eyes open. I never considered the possibility that sneezing might leave me unable to take my foot off the gas, much less hit the brake.
7
Speaking of sneezing and alcohol.. I would always know when my ex-boyfriend was officially drunk because he would sneeze exactly four times at that moment. It still cracks me up to this day.
8
Ugh, I hate driving and sneezing. I end up gripping the steering wheel twice as hard and getting spit all over the inside of the windshield.
10
its all about sneeze control. I have terrible allergies and when I drove a tow truck I had to teach myself to keep my sneeze low in my chest. Allows me to get the sneeze out, keep my eyes open and both hands stay on the wheel.
11
I was once in a gigantic tour bus that was cut off by a driver who had sneezed and swerved into the wrong lane. Our bus driver had to turn sharply to miss the car and we ended up on a sidewalk. It was intense.
13
@4 i'm not saying you have to find a fucking parking lot, all you have to do is slow down if you feel a sneezing fit coming on, and stop if that fit puts you in danger of losing control. there's no need to even pull off of the road...
17
I had a sneeze attack once while stopped at a signal on a hill behind someone... I let my foot off of the brake and rolled forward into the Benz. Ouch. And got a ticket. Double ouch.
18
This is making me afraid of other people sneezing while driving. Do people really totally lose control of their bodies when they sneeze? Do these people also fall into traffic if they sneeze while on the sidewalk or knock over entire produce bins if sneezing in the grocery store?
19
>Ugh, I hate driving and sneezing. I end up gripping the steering wheel twice as hard and getting spit all over the inside of the windshield.
Don't do that. That's likely why somebody in this situation would drift or swerve out of their lane. Gripping the wheel tighter might feel comforting, but it gives you much less control over your vehicle. You are already in a situation where control is compromised. If you grip the wheel tighter, your inputs are going to be exaggerated and jerky, which is NOT what you want.
If you are already stopped or going really slow (like in a parking lot or in front of your house that you are about to crash into), just mash the brake and keep it planted.
Don't do that. That's likely why somebody in this situation would drift or swerve out of their lane. Gripping the wheel tighter might feel comforting, but it gives you much less control over your vehicle. You are already in a situation where control is compromised. If you grip the wheel tighter, your inputs are going to be exaggerated and jerky, which is NOT what you want.
If you are already stopped or going really slow (like in a parking lot or in front of your house that you are about to crash into), just mash the brake and keep it planted.
20
@13: Great advice. I especially recommend this if you're in a flimsy old Nissan, flanked by SUVs, doing 60 through the Renton s-curves on I-405.
If for no other reason that it will make the guy in this story feel a lot better about himself for only hitting a house.
Seriously, dude, you obviously don't drive. Whereof you cannot speak, thereof you must be silent.
If for no other reason that it will make the guy in this story feel a lot better about himself for only hitting a house.
Seriously, dude, you obviously don't drive. Whereof you cannot speak, thereof you must be silent.
21
A "sneezing fit" did not cause this driver to crash into a house. Being a terrible driver -- one who didn't understand that if some situation pops up and makes it impossible for you to see, you need to slow down and stop -- caused him to crash into a house.
You don't "mash the brake." You slow down and stop.
You don't "mash the brake." You slow down and stop.
22
@20 quit being a dumbshit. of course you can find a situation in which the given advice is meaningless. In your case, before you close your eyes, you take a damn good look at the road in front of you, take your foot off both gas and brake, and keep your hands steady.
On the other hand, if it's 1AM and you're on a residential street, and there's no one else around, you can probably bring the car to a stop, which is the safest option, all things being equal. speed kills, right?
On the other hand, if it's 1AM and you're on a residential street, and there's no one else around, you can probably bring the car to a stop, which is the safest option, all things being equal. speed kills, right?
23
Oooooh an opportunity to share my trick for preventing a sneeze at an especially bad time! When you feel a sneeze coming on simply press hard against your upper lip and under your nose. I believe my 4th grade teacher taught me this, and I can't recall it ever failing for me.
24
@20: Fine, my example was extreme, but a lot of driving situations are such that slamming on the breaks suddenly is just as bad if not worse than driving blind for a few seconds. This guy, driving at 1 am on a road with only stop signs, probably should have done that, and it sounds like he tried. Still, the point is: in most situations that's not a good wager.
25
It's all fun and games until you have a monster sneeze driving on either of the inside/undivided lanes across the Aurora Bridge.
When I have an active cold, I usually avoid that lane.
When I have an active cold, I usually avoid that lane.
26
I have a friend who told me repeating the word, "Cow" usually stops a sneeze. I didn't believe her until I tried the trick while driving.
27
Man, I finished reading this thread and proceeded to sneeze about eight times in a row.
(Nobody write a slog post about yawning, please.)
(Nobody write a slog post about yawning, please.)
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