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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

My Bad

Posted by on Wed, Mar 25, 2009 at 11:37 AM

The other day, I let society down. I was about to enter the QFC on Broadway, at the corner of Republican and Harvard, when I saw a dog whose owner was decent enough to tie outside (rather than walk inside) the store. An old batty, stupid woman saw the same dog and decided in her own batty, stupid way that it looked hungry. She put her shopping down, looked for a "treat" in a bag, found a packet and opened it. I could not believe my eyes and ears: "You look so hungry... What's your name... You are so cute... You need something special, " she said to the dog, which was waving its tail. I wanted to push the old nutter away from the foolish dog and throw her treats into a bush. This was not an act of kindness; it was nothing but madness to feed another person's animal without permission. I'm not a dog lover, true, but I knew what she was doing was wrong and even criminal. Sadly, I did not want to get all tangled up with a madwoman and so walked by her and the dog without doing a damn thing. Sorry, society.

 

Comments (63) RSS

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1
A post about the Broadway QFC with complaints about a "madwoman"... are you genuinely invested in driving up troll posts on Slog?
Posted by Really? on March 25, 2009 at 11:38 AM
2
I freaking hate that. If I leave my bicycle or my motorcycle outside, everyone knows to leave it alone. My dog? They all want to feed him, pet him, take pictures of him with their kids. Usually it's uptight Seattleite types in polar fleece with that Seattle beard who are doing it. Now the bag ladies are doing it too? Shit.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 11:39 AM
3
Fucking bag ladies. Shit like that makes me want to drink free wine.
Posted by worf on March 25, 2009 at 11:43 AM
4
Here Charles, have a donut.
Posted by you look hungry on March 25, 2009 at 11:43 AM
5
If you leave your dog outside like that, people are going to touch/pet/feed it. Duh.
Posted by very bad homo on March 25, 2009 at 11:43 AM
6
people shouldn't tie their dogs outside the QFC.
cause when I am sprinting out the door after 'forgetting' to pay for my bottle of wine I could get tangled in the leash.
Posted by stupid dog owners on March 25, 2009 at 11:45 AM
7
If you leave your dog unattended I am probably going to hump it. Because I am a bad bad man. You've been warned. I just hope my kid doesn't see me do it.
Posted by Dam Savage on March 25, 2009 at 11:47 AM
8
i'm not mad, charles.... i'm just... disappointed.
Posted by society on March 25, 2009 at 11:48 AM
9
Glad you minded your own business for a change. Keep practicing like this and you might actually stop being a know-it-all.....

Good luck!
Posted by hartiepie on March 25, 2009 at 11:49 AM
10
Fuck that! i have a big ass dog on the hill "don't feed it people" she is on strict diet. I for some reason have to pick up it's shit and prefer it to be solid!!...oh btw it's wagging not waving thanks for the post
Posted by dicweed on March 25, 2009 at 11:49 AM
11
Red Rocket! Red Rocket!
Posted by Cartman on March 25, 2009 at 11:49 AM
12
And now that dog is DEAD.
Posted by cw on March 25, 2009 at 11:50 AM
13
Criminal? What statute are you referring to, jackass?
Posted by go listen to mad rad ya uncle tom! on March 25, 2009 at 11:52 AM
14
Every time I now see a dog outside a store I think of the movie Wendy & Lucy and I become sad.

Every time I see the duck outside the u-dist Safeway I become amused.
Posted by stinkbug on March 25, 2009 at 12:01 PM
15
I agree Charles, people should leave other people's pets alone. This kind of random interaction can create or reinforce bad habits the owner is trying to control, such as begging or jumping on people. I am also taken aback by the stupidity of people who try to interact with guide dogs leading blind people, bending over to pet and coo or even offering treats. These animals are working for a living helping a disabled person and some asshole wants to interfere with the safety of a disabled person.
Posted by Inkweary on March 25, 2009 at 12:01 PM
16
Charles is right.

1 - takes one to know one.
Posted by wilbur@work on March 25, 2009 at 12:08 PM
17
it tasted so fucking good. thx ldy.
Posted by the dog on March 25, 2009 at 12:09 PM
18
steal any wine?
Posted by my duck on March 25, 2009 at 12:31 PM
19
One day a dog is going to take her hand off. Than she'll learn.
Posted by Vince on March 25, 2009 at 12:36 PM
20
Here, sweetie, have some chocolate.
Posted by Fnarf on March 25, 2009 at 12:42 PM
21
Yeah, it's not okay to just go around giving any old food to a dog without the owner's permission. If you feed my dog certain kinds of treats, he gets diarrhea, which is really not pleasant for either of us. So, yeah, don't do that.

Petting a dog that's tied up is kind of dumb on your part, but not as big of a deal to me as a dog owner.
Posted by Julie in Eugene on March 25, 2009 at 12:45 PM
22
Actually, there are some foods that are ok for humans but poisonous to dogs.
Posted by Sad Comment on March 25, 2009 at 12:52 PM
23
@21,

If your dog bites some idiot who pets him without permission, it could be your problem. I'm no lawyer, but my understanding of liability laws is that you could still be held responsible, at the very least for leaving a "dangerous" dog alone in public.
Posted by keshmeshi on March 25, 2009 at 12:56 PM
24
I want to see Charles when he's a doddering old fart. He'll be the biggest kook out there.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on March 25, 2009 at 1:03 PM
25
@23 - Yeah, I know, but if I had even the slightest doubt in my dog's ability to interact with people without me around, I wouldn't leave him unattended (even with that, I do it rarely, and only a few minutes at a time).

I wouldn't pet some random dog because I don't have similar faith in other pet owners (as evidenced by the number of times I've been running with my dog and a tied-up dog goes berserk when we pass).
Posted by Julie in Eugene on March 25, 2009 at 1:04 PM
26
I like to feed people's dogs doggie treats laced with Ex-Lax. I never see the end result but it still cracks me up.
Posted by Hal on March 25, 2009 at 1:05 PM
27
I let all sorts of things pass at that QFC: People with 15 items in the 12 items or less line, kids standing up in shopping carts, people shoplifting wine...
Posted by burgin99 on March 25, 2009 at 1:13 PM
28
It is kind of a drag that the law comes down on the side of protecting morons from themselves. The really sad part is that most of these morons would be much better off trading a few of their fingers for few thousand dollars. The ones who value all their body parts more than a little bit of money aren't the ones messing with strange dogs for no good reason. OK, there. Now the slog has depressed me completely and the day is still young.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 1:13 PM
29
"Her's"?
Posted by Really? on March 25, 2009 at 1:15 PM
30
Aren't people who leave dogs unattended worried about someone stealing the dog?
Posted by Jen on March 25, 2009 at 1:16 PM
31
She probably also throws bread crumbs out to the god damned fucking pigeons.

You want to be kind to animals? Donate stuff or volunteer at a shelter.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on March 25, 2009 at 1:32 PM
32
@30 - I do worry about that a bit (or at least, I did more when I lived in Chicago). It's part of the reason why I don't tie him up often (the other being the whole thing about it's legally my fault if something happens, even if people are being idiots to my dog). If think if I had a young, "popular" breed, I probably would not leave it unattended...
Posted by Julie in Eugene on March 25, 2009 at 1:44 PM
33
This is the same kind of lady who will cross the street to avoid walking by a homeless, starving person, or pretend they don't exist when spoken to by said person.
Posted by not original on March 25, 2009 at 1:59 PM
34
@31, soak them in Tabasco first. Pigeons have absolutely zero memory.
Posted by Fnarf on March 25, 2009 at 2:08 PM
35
Don't touch my dog. Don't feed my dog.
He is not for you.
Posted by Seattleite on March 25, 2009 at 2:14 PM
36
Don't touch my dog. His life belongs to me! see how I chain him to the tree? MINE. See how I force him to live in this concrete jungle constructed for human beings? MINE. MY DOG MY LIFE DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT YOU SELFISH BASTARDS.
Posted by Dog Person on March 25, 2009 at 2:26 PM
37
Who's madder, the woman feeding the dog, or the man who makes a huge fuss over a such trivial incident?
Posted by seandr on March 25, 2009 at 2:31 PM
38
@ 37: "Madder" is a plant from the family Rubiaceae which is used as a dye. That Charles is "more mad" than the lady in question may well be true, but you have to know how to speak a language in order to insult someone in it.
Posted by Inkweary on March 25, 2009 at 2:51 PM
39
@30 totally, but I also realize that it doesn't happen very much and go about my day. Also, please learn about dogs some, since they're in your society and it's nice to know how to talk to them.
Posted by NaFun on March 25, 2009 at 3:07 PM
40
@38

You're fucking dumb.
Posted by Dismissive bcuz uv englisssh on March 25, 2009 at 3:13 PM
41
@38: mad, madder, maddest. "More mad" is wrong.
Posted by Fnarf on March 25, 2009 at 3:16 PM
42
Wow Charles, all of the sudden I see you in a whole new light and also realize why my dog is so fat. Thank you.
Posted by leap frog on March 25, 2009 at 3:23 PM
43
Don't leave your dog in public unattended and you don't have to worry about what happens when you're not there.
Posted by subwlf on March 25, 2009 at 3:23 PM
44
Well, happily dogs are well adapted to human society and can tolerate almost anything humans eat. Even human foods that are outright poisonous to dogs, such as onions and chocolate, need to be consumed in fairly large quantities to have any serious effect on them.

But, yes, when you tie your dog up in front of a store you do run the risk of people giving the dog bad things to eat...
Posted by Simac on March 25, 2009 at 3:28 PM
45
Fuck that. Here let me make some corrections.
Don't leave your dog in public unattended and you don't have to worry about what happens when you're not there because of all the dumfuck turds running loose who will not leave your dog alone.
And this too...
But, yes, when you tie your dog up in front of a store you do run the risk of dumfuck turds giving the dog bad things to eat...
I still want to know why only a shithead would touch my motorcycle but excuses get made for touching my dog. It's bullshit.

If I can't leave my dog on the sidewalk, then I want all that other shit -- sandwich board signs, bicycles, Stranger distro boxes, bums and their sleeping bag, -- all that shit, off the fucking sidewalk too.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 3:40 PM
46
BECAUSE YOUR DOG IS ALIVE AND PEOPLE WANT TO HELP A LIVING THING THAT IS CHAINED AND BOUND, let alone forced to live in your cramped apartment. Oh, but you're Mister Moral who would never do anything harmful to another living creatures so it's all those DERMFURK TOORDS who are the bad guys. Right-O mate! There they are, trying to make your dog happy, and all you do is bitch: DON'T TOUCH MY POSSESSIONS! This dog is like a fucking motorcycle to me! It's my THING! Don't touch! Bad! No! Bad!

You're fucking dumb too.
Posted by TYou Suck on March 25, 2009 at 4:31 PM
47
A dog is more precious than a motorcycle. The irony is that people have more respect for a thing than a dog. I can't believe this is so hard to figure out but I can see why you would use a throwaway name to say something that stupid. Turd.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 4:46 PM
48
@43, a dog owner has the right to leave his/her dog outside while they shop for food. i have no problem with that. to bring your dog into the grocery? that is wrong, very wrong.
Posted by mudede on March 25, 2009 at 4:49 PM
49
Err right, and you're being totally upfront about your identity.

The Irony is YOU care more about a motorcycle than a living thing. Don't brush this off because I don't have a nifty internet handle.

You've got things backwards. No one is trying to hurt your dog. They are trying to help. Maybe it's completely misguided and retarded help, but it's help. Altruism. Good-things. Yummy food.

You're trying to say people should respect your dog just like they respect your motorcycle and that IS FUCKING DUMB
Posted by SpiffyStaticHandle on March 25, 2009 at 5:50 PM
50
@49

Sorry. I couldn't possibly write a post long enough to remedy how ignorant of dogs you are. Please don't feed anybody else's dog. If you do it anyway and something bad happens to you, don't say nobody warned you.

It is absolutely true that no normal person would lay a finger on somebody else's motorcycle -- or bicycle or car -- without permission. Everybody knows that is highly uncool. Do you know any normal people, like a relative or friend of a friend? Ask them.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 6:13 PM
51
Nope, I don't know any normal animal-abusing people. Most people I know like to treat animals like they are ALIVE. You however....

BTW I fucking hate dogs, and I won't feed or touch anybodies nasty stinky mangy animal. Yet still I seem to have more respect for them as living beings than you. Bizarre.
Posted by Justify! Deny Deny! on March 25, 2009 at 6:33 PM
52
what were you gonna do? run over there and wag your finger at the lady? slow news day?
Posted by axel on March 25, 2009 at 7:09 PM
53
@49/51, etc. Hey idiot. elenchos doesn't want people fucking with his dog, because it's bad for the dog when people fuck with it. Not because it's a "thing" that he's being possessive of.

You give a dog food, it could get sick, have food allergies, etc. If you pet it, maybe the dog doesn't like people touching its ears or something -- worst case, you fuck with it, it bites you, and it has to be put down.

And stop with the "ooh, the poor doggie tied up outside" bullshit. If my dog is tied up outside the grocery store, it's because I've taken him on a long walk/run, and I want to pop in to get something on the way home. Much better than leaving him at home, right?
Posted by Julie in Eugene on March 25, 2009 at 7:17 PM
54
@53 Nope you're an asshole who's confining a dog in a small apartment all day and only letting him out on your terms, for a "long" run/walk. You're abusive and in denial. Have fun with your dog who loves you because it doesn't know what else to do!

Maybe it's a control issue? I'm sure you're not intentionally cruel, but maybe you just NEED that companionship? You need something to rely on you? Who knows, but a city is far from the ideal place for a dog, and taking your dog an A walk or A run a day is not altruistic. A dog can run ALL FUCKING DAY LONG. You can run for maybe an hour. If that gives your dog a workout, it's out of shape from a sedinatry urban life and that IS your fault.

Oh but your entitled to your dog and you're going to keep it, cuz some random d00d on the internet doesn't have any say in YOUR life. You're fucking stupid too.
Posted by in your heart of hearts on March 25, 2009 at 7:31 PM
55
@54

Your assumptions about where and how I live, and what my dog's needs are completely wrong. You're just guessing, and in this case, you guessed wrong. When you see my dog waiting outside a store or cafe, you know zero about him, or what his needs are. Just like you know zero about me. The smart thing to do when you see my dog, since you know absolutely nothing is to mind your own business. It isn't too much to ask.
Posted by elenchos on March 25, 2009 at 8:48 PM
56
@54 - Oh, please. You want to know about my dog? Okay. He lived an "idyllic" life in the country for the first two years of his life. He was kept outside most of the time (plenty of room to run and play!), and when his leg became infected from having his chain wrapped around it, his previous owner was just going to shoot him instead of pay for a vet bill. The vet rescued him, we adopted him. I'm 100% positive he prefers his current life to being shot in the head.

Even when we lived in Chicago, he got plenty of exercise, fresh air, and socialization with other dogs (I may only be able to run for an hour, but that plus a half an hour of sprinting at the dog beach is more than enough of a workout for my size/breed of dog). It is absolutely possible to have all of your dogs physical and emotional needs met in a city. Does everyone do it? No, of course not. But, keeping a dog in a city isn’t any more or less moral than keeping one in the country.
Posted by Julie in Eugene on March 25, 2009 at 9:50 PM
57
@ Julie & elenchos... Thank you.
Posted by drewl on March 25, 2009 at 11:16 PM
58
Charles, I appreciate your continuing series of taking non-human animals more seriously than it appears that your have ever been able to heretofore. There is a nuclear type blast bunker density of observation to be had here which I respect.
Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale on March 25, 2009 at 11:33 PM
59
Elenchos: I do too touch your motorcycle.
Posted by Fnarf on March 26, 2009 at 2:14 AM
60
Yes, Fnarf, I should have been more specific. I meant when they touch it in a displeasurable way. The special thing you do is, well, special. Too special for words.
Posted by elenchos on March 26, 2009 at 9:04 AM
61
Well, one of the obvious differences between a dog & a motorcycle is that the motorcycle doesn't make pleading eyes at me & bounce up & down in my path, begging me to touch it. :) Many is the time I have come across some pet owner's dog tied up outside a cafe or a grocery, & he/she wants some attention. If the dog doesn't engage me, of course I just walk on by; in in most cases, even if the dog is kinda.."Won't you pet me", I keep going. Not because it's someone else's property, I admit, but because you don't know the dog, or its issues, or whether it's gonna find a head pat threatening if it's too hard, etc. If a doggie throws itself at me & I have a coupla minutes, yes, I'll pet the damn dog. I can't resist.

So really, you as dog owners would find that wrong if the dog begged for some petting? That's not being disrespectful of your property, but respectful to the dog, an independent being who's gonna hang out & make friends if you leave him or her tied up outside.

Let me add, though, that I would never feed someone else's animal. I mean: if I was asked to, knew their diets, sure. But just, here poochie, have a treat? What if the dog is sickly? What if it's allergic to something? That's like randomly feeding some stranger's kid. Although there are usually no kids tied up outside of stores..! ;)

Hmmm, perhaps an obvious, extra-large dog tag that says "don't feed me", that you clip onto the dog's collar while you go inside..?

Posted by Eva Hopkins on March 27, 2009 at 7:06 AM
62
What is the big deal?

By the way, if someone's trained their dog properly, they're not going to take the food offered by a stranger.
Posted by idaho on March 27, 2009 at 9:23 PM
63
don't ever come pet me. it's not cool, okay?

I am not a thing. You may or may not be a thing to me, though, sometimes I just see "prey" and go bonkers, I don't know......so do not come and try to feed me by offering out your hand for me to eat, okay?
Posted by Pit Bull on March 28, 2009 at 5:21 PM

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