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News & ArtsMonday, March 16, 2009
Sex Gay Hell
Posted by Dan Savage on Mon, Mar 16, 2009 at 8:35 AM
If God's still looking for a place to send bad gay men for all eternity—in addition to, say, Indiana—He couldn't do worse than this particular circle of Hell.
2
Still? Still, in 2009? We women still haven't been able to enjoy our bodies and our sexuality without guilt?
Someone should have told me . . .
In our culture, admitting our bodies matter is almost an admission of failure. . . . I don’t think women will really experience freedom until they own their sexuality.
Still? Still, in 2009? We women still haven't been able to enjoy our bodies and our sexuality without guilt?
Someone should have told me . . .
3
I dunno; the guy in the last photo looked pretty gay to me. Maybe this is where closeted Mormon boys go to learn how to get their future wives off without touching their twat.
5
Dan, did you know that the Indiana legislature deflected an attempt to amend the constitution to define marriage as between a man and a woman?
I know picking on Utah is getting old, but surely there are other states more worthy of the honor than Indiana.
I know picking on Utah is getting old, but surely there are other states more worthy of the honor than Indiana.
6
3. The men do touch the womens' twats. The whole point is to get them off. However:
NO FAIR!!!!
Although men are not touched by the women and do not climax . . .
NO FAIR!!!!
9
A bunch of sexually dysfunctional hippie chicks and emasculated loser hippie guys? That sounds like ANY sane person's version of hell.
11
Hell? Seems to me it might actually be better than the reparative therapies that usually have some sort of religious connotations to them.
The appreciation of the female body by the men without having to be unclothed at first might actually be an attractive and non intimidating first step for gay men who want to take this approach to changing their lives.
The appreciation of the female body by the men without having to be unclothed at first might actually be an attractive and non intimidating first step for gay men who want to take this approach to changing their lives.
12
Dan, what does this have to do with being gay?
I'm gay gay gay and don't see how learning about female orgasms has any impact on gayatude....
I'm gay gay gay and don't see how learning about female orgasms has any impact on gayatude....
14
Damaged goods looking for someone to tell them how to live their lives.
And how fucked up do you have to be to convert to Orthodox Judiasm? Oy Vey.
And how fucked up do you have to be to convert to Orthodox Judiasm? Oy Vey.
15
I know an awful lot about female orgasms -- I have to cuz it's mah job. But there's a difference between knowing about female orgasms and living in a commune where your only role is diddling women to orgasm every morning.
16
I would be so willing to lay down for "morning practice" and have my special eunuch, I mean, my goddess loving pet/man stroke and poke my holes until the cream comes out. Somehow I am betting my man would not be willing to change his status from boyfriend to "research partner". Too bad, I would be OMing until the cows came home.
So my REAL question: is this Ms. Daedone an energized new age guru and healer, or is she a domineering control freak who gets off on being in charge of this cult like scene? Scary.
So my REAL question: is this Ms. Daedone an energized new age guru and healer, or is she a domineering control freak who gets off on being in charge of this cult like scene? Scary.
17
Eh. The center's goal of teaching women to own their sexuality sounds laudable enough. All the quasi-Buddhist and yoga stuff is pretty typical; from the story, this place seems less hellish than you imagine it to be, Dan.
I don't feel like picking up and living in a commune as a masturbatory aid, but who am I to judge the men who do?
I don't feel like picking up and living in a commune as a masturbatory aid, but who am I to judge the men who do?
18
Oh come on, Dan. Have you ever diddled a woman to orgasm in your entire life? Hmm, didn't think so.
19
@6: Really? I assumed they were just stroking their auras and describing their twats in all their pearlescent glory. Well, the lack of oral and penile contact might still hold some magic for those Mormon boys...
22
The reporter missed the boat on the story when she didn't follow up her line on page 2 that Crittenden "resisted offers to pursue further courses (for a fee)" with the obvious question about how much money Daedone is raking in from these "fees".
I'd also be interested to see if belonging to this commune - which usually means members share everything including income - is contingent on paying a fee, turning over their paychecks every week or turning over their entire life savings to Daedone.
The answer to the money questions is the difference between a sort of school and a cult - a pretty important distinction for a so-called "news" paper to miss.
I'd also be interested to see if belonging to this commune - which usually means members share everything including income - is contingent on paying a fee, turning over their paychecks every week or turning over their entire life savings to Daedone.
The answer to the money questions is the difference between a sort of school and a cult - a pretty important distinction for a so-called "news" paper to miss.
24
Good Morning Dan,
I read the article and thought of that hugging group/circle in NYC where several participants (both genders) were encouraged to lie down with one another and "hug" or "caress" all while fully clothed! Yeah, that's a pretty ridiculous situation (One Taste). Not something I'd indulge in. I love the ephemistic vocabulary "orgasmic meditation" or "OMing". I agree it would be a circle of hell for straight men. It definitely sounds cultish (Ms. Daedone's denials notwithstanding). One of a long line (remember EST? the Bagwam Rajnish's compound in Oregon from back in the day?) of simliar outfits with a dynamic or charismatic leader and followers looking for a release or enlightenment through their bodies/minds but w/o sex. Though in some cases that was the case (the worst manifestation was in Jim Jones' People's Temple in the 70s also based in SF at the time). Weird but nothing new.
Thanks for the article.
I read the article and thought of that hugging group/circle in NYC where several participants (both genders) were encouraged to lie down with one another and "hug" or "caress" all while fully clothed! Yeah, that's a pretty ridiculous situation (One Taste). Not something I'd indulge in. I love the ephemistic vocabulary "orgasmic meditation" or "OMing". I agree it would be a circle of hell for straight men. It definitely sounds cultish (Ms. Daedone's denials notwithstanding). One of a long line (remember EST? the Bagwam Rajnish's compound in Oregon from back in the day?) of simliar outfits with a dynamic or charismatic leader and followers looking for a release or enlightenment through their bodies/minds but w/o sex. Though in some cases that was the case (the worst manifestation was in Jim Jones' People's Temple in the 70s also based in SF at the time). Weird but nothing new.
Thanks for the article.
25
@11,
Why should gay men want to change? There is nothing in the article about gay men. Plus, hello, there are plenty of beautiful men out there.
Why should gay men want to change? There is nothing in the article about gay men. Plus, hello, there are plenty of beautiful men out there.
26
My question is why is it the men who are bringing the women to orgasm? That doesn't sound like "owning your sexuality" if you're relying on someone else to bring you to climax.
27
25 my comment was merely in response to Dan's wrong assumption that the place is some sort of "Gay Hell", when in reality it might be good for those that are seeking a new path and better life. I'm not saying that's what all gay men want, but from looking at the numbers of those that do seek therapy one can say there are many who do.
I think Dan subconsciously was hinting on that possibility since I've heard him say many times that gay men are more willing to explore different sexual experiences. One Taste might be one of them and through the non-intimidating, non-fast rush into heterosexual sex environment , they slowly might discover that they like it. It's a possibility, a new different option if you may. That's all.
There are plenty handsome some out there Kim but we need more of them that are actually batting for our side and not for the other team. LOL
I think Dan subconsciously was hinting on that possibility since I've heard him say many times that gay men are more willing to explore different sexual experiences. One Taste might be one of them and through the non-intimidating, non-fast rush into heterosexual sex environment , they slowly might discover that they like it. It's a possibility, a new different option if you may. That's all.
There are plenty handsome some out there Kim but we need more of them that are actually batting for our side and not for the other team. LOL
28
Sigh. It's sad the lengths that straight people have to go to just to have a little sex party.
You want to know what gay hell is like, Dan? Just walk in a straight guy's shoes for a month.
You want to know what gay hell is like, Dan? Just walk in a straight guy's shoes for a month.
29
looks like a good place for short-term healing and re-education for str8 people. and the woman did not strike me as coercive or creepy. just a true-believer. nor did the ex-members criticisms strike me as very damning. they did it, they had enough, they moved on. that's as it should be.
and yes, teh gay boys need to go somewhere else. and so what?
and yes, teh gay boys need to go somewhere else. and so what?
30
guarantee that 75% of the women there would LOSE THEIR SHIT if there was a blowjob training camp.
just a thought.
just a thought.
31
@Lovestroll: "...from looking at the numbers of those that do seek therapy one can say there are many who do. "
Maybe they're seeking therapy because asshats like you keep telling them that they're in need of a better life. You know, I'm straight, but you REALLY make me want to turn -- far more effectively than Dan Savage and the Gay Agenda ever could.
Maybe they're seeking therapy because asshats like you keep telling them that they're in need of a better life. You know, I'm straight, but you REALLY make me want to turn -- far more effectively than Dan Savage and the Gay Agenda ever could.
32
@ 1 - Although it's not my home state, I echo your sentiments. I have several straight friends in IN who are totally OK with my gay ass.
33
Loveschild @ 27,
Thanks for your answer. Have to say I don't share the idea that gay men need to seek a "new path and a better life", especially if the goal of that "new path and better life" is to "change" them from gay to straight. Any gay man, seeking to change his sexual orientation is likely a miserable man. He'd find the best life by accepting who he is. Now, if some gay men want to explore, then thats their business and perhaps joining One Taste will appeal to them.
Thanks for your answer. Have to say I don't share the idea that gay men need to seek a "new path and a better life", especially if the goal of that "new path and better life" is to "change" them from gay to straight. Any gay man, seeking to change his sexual orientation is likely a miserable man. He'd find the best life by accepting who he is. Now, if some gay men want to explore, then thats their business and perhaps joining One Taste will appeal to them.
34
Y'know, I think I've read about a place like this before, only it was women who were used as sexual servants to men. Where was that? Oh yeah, in The Handmaid's Tale.
And, Loveschild, please, just fuck off. Seriously.
And, Loveschild, please, just fuck off. Seriously.
36
Agree with 1 and 35.
Indiana isn't as bad everyone makes it out to be. Us gays here do pretty well.
Indiana isn't as bad everyone makes it out to be. Us gays here do pretty well.
37
Loveschild, it's time you found a new path, and a better life through a non threatening introduction to homosexuality.
The appreciation of the male body by the men without having to be unclothed at first might actually be an attractive and non intimidating first step for straight men who want to take this approach to changing their lives.
One Taste might be one of them and through the non-intimidating, non-fast rush into homosexual sex environment , they slowly might discover that they like it. It's a possibility, a new different option if you may. That's all.
Loveschild, you know you want to...
The appreciation of the male body by the men without having to be unclothed at first might actually be an attractive and non intimidating first step for straight men who want to take this approach to changing their lives.
One Taste might be one of them and through the non-intimidating, non-fast rush into homosexual sex environment , they slowly might discover that they like it. It's a possibility, a new different option if you may. That's all.
Loveschild, you know you want to...
38
Dan, they actually have a large number of gay men living at said "commune". I don't have a lot of details, but maybe they stroke each others prostates for orgasmic meditation.
They're claiming to focus on male orgasm now too, but the place does strike you as more than a wee bit cultish.
They're claiming to focus on male orgasm now too, but the place does strike you as more than a wee bit cultish.
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