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News & ArtsMonday, March 9, 2009
Economy Forget Your Head; Invest in a Rifle
Posted by Jonathan Golob on Mon, Mar 9, 2009 at 11:23 AM
So says the ExiledOnline, in a dark-minded companion to my earlier take on this same problem:
Deep in your heart of hearts you know this day will come. It may come tomorrow or 10 years from now, but its coming is as inevitable as your funeral. The TV will go silent, the Internet will cease with a shudder, the police and army will vanish. Whatever the reason, our civilization as we know it will cease to exist and will be replaced by a makeshift barter economy filled with lawlessness, disease and ravenous humanity. Mad Max’s time will come, but there will be no pretty hero to save you.Eventually, the situation may stabilize. But in the first few months, inaction will weed out the weak, the timid and the infirm. Whether you and yours survive depends only on you.
Your survival will depend on the tools you have at your disposal. A lot has been written about earthquake survival kits, flood survival kits, tornado survival kits and the like. Those articles contain great information on how much and what kind of provisions and tools to store, but none of them cover the tools and supplies that will really matter: firepower. Yes, the most important tool you can have in this type of situation is an appropriate firearm and a big supply of ammo. If you chose wisely, and your luck holds, you will live, perhaps long enough to see order restored. If you don’t, you will die.
2
You prissy boys are probably being cute with this post but as the Welfare State collapses that day is closer than you think.
The Coming Times will be a great Darwinian sieve and it will be a different America that emerges.
The Coming Times will be a great Darwinian sieve and it will be a different America that emerges.
4
Lol, I love these people! Personally I just have a map to where the Mormons* live, as they are required to keep 2 years of provisions, and a 12 gauge.
*The prop 8 donation data is great for this!
*The prop 8 donation data is great for this!
6
@3: Exactly.
All of this sort of writing made me think of David Brin's The Postman (the exemplar book, not the terrible movie).
Still, recall from Brin's book: One of the few happy places the protagonist remembered was a ranch community in Montana run by a doctor...
I'm probably going to invest in antibiotic-producing yeast, rather than a firearm.
All of this sort of writing made me think of David Brin's The Postman (the exemplar book, not the terrible movie).
Still, recall from Brin's book: One of the few happy places the protagonist remembered was a ranch community in Montana run by a doctor...
I'm probably going to invest in antibiotic-producing yeast, rather than a firearm.
7
I just know the jerks stockpiling ammo for "self defense" would be the ones to bust down my door and shoot me dead over a can of baked beans.
I, however, will just have to rely on my good looks to survive in this dystopia.
I, however, will just have to rely on my good looks to survive in this dystopia.
8
I'm with #3; similar to asking why you'd want to survive a nuclear war, why would you want to survive the collapse of society?
The American public is insufferably stupid enough as it is.
The cries for more tax cuts have almost drowned out the screams for more placebos.
The American public is insufferably stupid enough as it is.
The cries for more tax cuts have almost drowned out the screams for more placebos.
9
Each day I comprehend more and more the term "knee-jerk reaction". This post further contributes to the understanding that if you tap a kneecap with a hammer, an involuntary kick of the foot will result. At best the gunshop owners should be thrilled with this Darwinless Affect.
10
Translation: "At the first sign of trouble, I'm grabbing my gun and robbing my neighbor's food supply!"
12
After the Internet goes out, I still hope we can get together and make fun of each other for being unemployed.
13
This is just more apocalyptic crap from the same crowd who said the world was going to end at Midnight on December 31, 1999.
Quit knuckling under to fear and paranoia. Suck it up and act like a grownup for crissakes.
Quit knuckling under to fear and paranoia. Suck it up and act like a grownup for crissakes.
15
When the Rapture happens, there will be dancing in the streets, especially since most of the gun nuts will be gone.
17
"But in the first few months, inaction will weed out the weak, the timid and the infirm."
And the trigger-happy gun nuts will weed themselves out via action as they find out how complicated and unforgiving urban lawlessness really is.
And the trigger-happy gun nuts will weed themselves out via action as they find out how complicated and unforgiving urban lawlessness really is.
18
What look do you think these gun nuts will have on their face after their equally-heavily-armed neighbor comes to the door to ask them why they shot his son over a can of baked beans?
But yeah, you have to admit, a little hiccup in the mortgage biz is way, way worse than WWII, the Great Depression, the Civil War, etc. etc.
But yeah, you have to admit, a little hiccup in the mortgage biz is way, way worse than WWII, the Great Depression, the Civil War, etc. etc.
19
What's bizarre is the fervent belief of people like this that the only thing standing between the current US and horrible dystopia is a thriving stock market. Sure, crime went up during the Great Depression, but the nation hardly turned into a brutal war zone.
The people who make these predictions depict their fellow Americans - or at least the ones that don't look or act exactly like them, anyway - as subhuman monsters out to steal, rape and pillage. They paint apocalyptic scenarios in such detail that you get the impression they're looking forward to it, and that the world can't end soon enough for them.
Weirdos.
The people who make these predictions depict their fellow Americans - or at least the ones that don't look or act exactly like them, anyway - as subhuman monsters out to steal, rape and pillage. They paint apocalyptic scenarios in such detail that you get the impression they're looking forward to it, and that the world can't end soon enough for them.
Weirdos.
20
Survivalists are huge drama queens.
The funny thing is, they're the ones that will probably end up accidentally killing themselves in the unlikely event society ever does collapse. Which just goes to show that Darwin was right.
The funny thing is, they're the ones that will probably end up accidentally killing themselves in the unlikely event society ever does collapse. Which just goes to show that Darwin was right.
22
The fear is urban riots in the period of collapse, then, spilling into the countryside.
That is not a too far out projection. Remember in the debacle in New Orleans people were fired on trying to leave the city by the one functioning bridge.
In a priod of total dysfunction, food supplies depleted, utilities not working, I would not be the one to project peace and harmony.
I don't have a gun, have tons of canned food on hand, know how to survive on basics, but, would prefer to take my food and go to my sisters place out in the woods, and go primal for a couple of years.
For shot guns, remember slug shells. NOT bird shot.
If you don't know, look it up.
That is not a too far out projection. Remember in the debacle in New Orleans people were fired on trying to leave the city by the one functioning bridge.
In a priod of total dysfunction, food supplies depleted, utilities not working, I would not be the one to project peace and harmony.
I don't have a gun, have tons of canned food on hand, know how to survive on basics, but, would prefer to take my food and go to my sisters place out in the woods, and go primal for a couple of years.
For shot guns, remember slug shells. NOT bird shot.
If you don't know, look it up.
23
The problem is in environments where people are completely isolated from each other and have no associations. Remember these conservatives come from places where there are no people and therefore develop paranoid fantasies and suspicions of everyone around them. Seattle would probably be closer to something like Barcelona during the Spanish Civil War, it'll be kick ass +1000 sho nuff. Though we might want to place people at the North and South Gates, and on I-90 to deal with hill-folk raiders. But, that goes without saying.
24
Seriously, IF The Big One ever hits, the smart money won't be on the trigger-happy gun-nuts who apparently will be hell-bent on shooting anything in sight - including each other - but rather on those who remain quiet and unobtrusive, staying in the shadows until the crazies complete their round of Mutual Assured Destruction, at which point they'll be in a much better position to pick through the leavings.
25
AGreed @22; remember kids, the images out of New Orleans.. did you think something like that could happen in the US? Hm?
27
When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. Who besides gun nuts thinks the situation in New Orleans after Katrina would have been easily solved if only everyone had a lot more weapons?
28
I've got 5 acres now so I'm growing a giant garden this summer and I'm looking into planting it for winter as well. My decision to do this was about eating yummy organic produce not about preparing for some kind of impending apocalypse... However my friend did bring up the point that were society to collapse people would probably be bumrushing my little mini-farm for food. His suggestion was to get guns, but upon thinking about it I was apt to agree with @24. I think a better solution would be to lay low and try to disguise my crops somehow.
Should such a thing ever happen I do definitely look forward to replacing my car with a horse as my main mode of transportation. Cruising around on horesback is way more awesome than cars and buses could ever be.
Should such a thing ever happen I do definitely look forward to replacing my car with a horse as my main mode of transportation. Cruising around on horesback is way more awesome than cars and buses could ever be.
29
@28: If everyone had basement grow ops, we could quickly convert from weed to defensible potato crops.
If you used solar and wind to power the grow ops, your neighbors could hold the solar panels and windmills hostage by threatening to shoot them... Oxen turning a windlass? Specially harnessed anthills? Naked Terminator robots with mini nuclear reactors in their chest cavities? Ethanol, manufactured in wood-fired stills? Creek-driven water wheels?
If you used solar and wind to power the grow ops, your neighbors could hold the solar panels and windmills hostage by threatening to shoot them... Oxen turning a windlass? Specially harnessed anthills? Naked Terminator robots with mini nuclear reactors in their chest cavities? Ethanol, manufactured in wood-fired stills? Creek-driven water wheels?
30
I'm disappointed. They didn't say a single thing about zombies. And YOU KNOW zombies are going to be problem #1.
31
Just Christ, the article obsesses with the 500 yard accuracy of the .308, and pretends to be about self defense. Nuts like these are just champing at the bit to blow someone's head off.
32
@29: I'm think if given the choice I'd go for a combo of Naked Terminator robots and anthills. You've definitely got to harness two power sources in case one fails. Basement grow ops are a great option, but unfortunately I have no basement... While not as defensible, I am growing a bunch of shitake and maitake mushrooms down in discrete forested areas of the property. That way I we can harness their anti-tumor and anti-cancer properties to fight off the effects of radiation poisoning from the inevitable nuclear bomb blasts (provided we're outside of the kill zone).
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29
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Potatoes are the perfect survival crop.
You can eat them or throw them at zombies. (Grow tomatoes if you only want to insult the zombies)
30
Potatoes are the perfect survival crop.
You can eat them or throw them at zombies. (Grow tomatoes if you only want to insult the zombies)
35
New Orleans is the perfect example, but multiply it by every urban center and there won't be any hope of help arriving.
The veneer of civilization has grown very thin in our society.
A society that aborts a million a year has calluses on it's heart.
New Orleans showed that people who have become totally dependent on the Welfare State to think for them and meet their every need will be totally helpless when the system breaks down.
Our cities are violent and full of crime now. When there are no policemen or courts how will it be? Again, recall New Orleans (people firing at rescue helicopters even) Our cities riot after ball games- how will it be in an actual crisis?
The stores will be stripped of food in 24 hours. If you have prepared will you share with the 10 times as many who have not? If you choose not to how will they react?
Perhaps you can eat the NEA funded art. Then the artists.
The veneer of civilization has grown very thin in our society.
A society that aborts a million a year has calluses on it's heart.
New Orleans showed that people who have become totally dependent on the Welfare State to think for them and meet their every need will be totally helpless when the system breaks down.
Our cities are violent and full of crime now. When there are no policemen or courts how will it be? Again, recall New Orleans (people firing at rescue helicopters even) Our cities riot after ball games- how will it be in an actual crisis?
The stores will be stripped of food in 24 hours. If you have prepared will you share with the 10 times as many who have not? If you choose not to how will they react?
Perhaps you can eat the NEA funded art. Then the artists.
37
Yes, Bush is Hitler, Americans were going to be rounded up and put into concentration camps, the 2004 elections were nearly canceled, Bush knew about 9/11 before it happened, the NSA is listening to your phone conversations, Obama could be assassinated at any instant -- and it's the gun-owning rednecks who are hysterical drama queens.
Progressives, heal thyselves.
God, you people are boring.
Progressives, heal thyselves.
God, you people are boring.
38
24
How much food do you have stored? How long can you hunker down in the shadows? When the mob gets hungry it will pick thru every shadow, a dozen times over. Will you be armed?
Put the smart money on those with bunkers (not a joke) and food and guns. How many people like that do you know? There are a lot in the country. They shop at WalMart. They don't know where the nearest Starbucks is.
Darwin will be very unforgiving.
How much food do you have stored? How long can you hunker down in the shadows? When the mob gets hungry it will pick thru every shadow, a dozen times over. Will you be armed?
Put the smart money on those with bunkers (not a joke) and food and guns. How many people like that do you know? There are a lot in the country. They shop at WalMart. They don't know where the nearest Starbucks is.
Darwin will be very unforgiving.
40
"The veneer of society has grown very thin" -- do you have ANY IDEA how stupid you sound?
You live in the richest and most successful country in the history of the world.
The only people who are threatened by the "new world" that looms are backwards boobs like you. You're terrified, but you're stupid, and you have nothing to offer the future. Your sons and daughters don't want to live in your bunkers; they want to freely participate in a wide world of interest and opportunity.
When you finally do stick your heads out of your ass, and see nobody around, it will not be because the world is gone, but because we'll all be living happy and fruitful lives as far away from you dipshits as we can get.
You live in the richest and most successful country in the history of the world.
The only people who are threatened by the "new world" that looms are backwards boobs like you. You're terrified, but you're stupid, and you have nothing to offer the future. Your sons and daughters don't want to live in your bunkers; they want to freely participate in a wide world of interest and opportunity.
When you finally do stick your heads out of your ass, and see nobody around, it will not be because the world is gone, but because we'll all be living happy and fruitful lives as far away from you dipshits as we can get.
41
@35,
Yeah, there were reports of what? One gunshot directed at a rescue helicopter? Give me a fucking break. If anything, it was the middle class whiteys who went batshit during Katrina, killing any black person who dared venture into their communities, no matter whether that black person had yet committed any crimes. In other words, people like YOU devolved that quickly into inhuman scumsuckers. Is that why you're so worried? Because you know how YOU would behave even in a relatively minor calamity and you assume everyone else is as shitty as you are?
Also, what Fnarf said. It's amazing how much coddled people with soft hands worry about this shit. Do they have too much free time? Do their full bellies make them irrationally afraid that any little thing will take that comfort away?
Yeah, there were reports of what? One gunshot directed at a rescue helicopter? Give me a fucking break. If anything, it was the middle class whiteys who went batshit during Katrina, killing any black person who dared venture into their communities, no matter whether that black person had yet committed any crimes. In other words, people like YOU devolved that quickly into inhuman scumsuckers. Is that why you're so worried? Because you know how YOU would behave even in a relatively minor calamity and you assume everyone else is as shitty as you are?
Also, what Fnarf said. It's amazing how much coddled people with soft hands worry about this shit. Do they have too much free time? Do their full bellies make them irrationally afraid that any little thing will take that comfort away?
42
I've visited a number of survivalist websites, since once you've picked through the paranoia and the endless posts about what guns you need, some have some very good tips about camping, gardening, preserving food, etc. The strangest thing about most of them is the eagerness with which they wait. "Bugout time" or "the shit hitting the fan" is basically the equivalent of the Rapture, and it can't come soon enough. After all, once you've got all these supplies stored up, all this ammo, all these plans, what are they going to do but sit there and get old unless something happens?
There is nothing sexy about rotating food supplies every two years, deciding whether ten-year-old ammo you got on sale is still safe, and trying to explain to people why you live in a camper in the woods. On the other hand, if they're right, they're the hero in their own super-manly survival drama in which they are Rambo and McGuyver and Noah all rolled into one! Men envy them, women want them, they are loved by dogs and children, etc. etc. None of the sites that I saw seem to be maintained or frequented by women, but I'm sure there are distaff versions out there.
I guess the end reality is that everyone needs something to hope for. Hoping for the end of the world, whether by divine fiat or societal meltdown, seems perverse, but it's certainly a lot easier than hoping for something that would require effort on your part to accomplish.
There is nothing sexy about rotating food supplies every two years, deciding whether ten-year-old ammo you got on sale is still safe, and trying to explain to people why you live in a camper in the woods. On the other hand, if they're right, they're the hero in their own super-manly survival drama in which they are Rambo and McGuyver and Noah all rolled into one! Men envy them, women want them, they are loved by dogs and children, etc. etc. None of the sites that I saw seem to be maintained or frequented by women, but I'm sure there are distaff versions out there.
I guess the end reality is that everyone needs something to hope for. Hoping for the end of the world, whether by divine fiat or societal meltdown, seems perverse, but it's certainly a lot easier than hoping for something that would require effort on your part to accomplish.
43
Fearfully stockpiling guns and ammo for the zompocalypse is rather silly. So is the (common but certainly not universal) liberal fear of guns.
44
True @42. The isolated loners hunkering down in their concrete bunkers out in the middle of nowhere with their year's supply of canned goods and private arsenals in anticipation of a complete societal collapse that will never occur are simply living out a pathetic masturbatory fantasy wherein they've cast themselves as the heroic defender of Traditional Values set against the rampaging hordes of Librul Decadence.
They assume that, since they've put in all this time, effort and money in preparation for what they believe to be an inevitable social collapse, that anyone who hasn't done likewise will either quickly succumb to a mass panic, or else be annihilated in a hail of Righteous Gunfire by the Chosen Few. What they fail to recognize is that, short of a Global Extinction Event that will take out EVERYONE, regardless of their level of preparedness, the type of collapse they envision simply isn't going to happen overnight, ala Katrina. It'll take years, decades even, during which people will have plenty of time to alter their behavior patterns in anticipation of a wholesale restructuring of the social order.
The starving masses they have wet-dreams of moving down with their military-grade firepower will never make it to their isolated enclaves, for the simple reason that everyone will be far too busy communally digging up garden plots, and raising livestock in what were once public greenbelts to be bothered with exerting extraneous effort in hunting them down.
Which will no doubt come as a great disappointment to them. After all, what's the fun in having all those guns, if nobody comes along to be shot at?
They assume that, since they've put in all this time, effort and money in preparation for what they believe to be an inevitable social collapse, that anyone who hasn't done likewise will either quickly succumb to a mass panic, or else be annihilated in a hail of Righteous Gunfire by the Chosen Few. What they fail to recognize is that, short of a Global Extinction Event that will take out EVERYONE, regardless of their level of preparedness, the type of collapse they envision simply isn't going to happen overnight, ala Katrina. It'll take years, decades even, during which people will have plenty of time to alter their behavior patterns in anticipation of a wholesale restructuring of the social order.
The starving masses they have wet-dreams of moving down with their military-grade firepower will never make it to their isolated enclaves, for the simple reason that everyone will be far too busy communally digging up garden plots, and raising livestock in what were once public greenbelts to be bothered with exerting extraneous effort in hunting them down.
Which will no doubt come as a great disappointment to them. After all, what's the fun in having all those guns, if nobody comes along to be shot at?
45
AGreed @22; remember kids, the images out of New Orleans.. did you think something like that could happen in the US? Hm?
I visited Louisiana several times in the years before Katrina--I felt the same way.
Survivalist gun nuts fantasize about shooting two types of people: government/law enforcement agents and people with dark skin. They think about it A Lot.
I visited Louisiana several times in the years before Katrina--I felt the same way.
Survivalist gun nuts fantasize about shooting two types of people: government/law enforcement agents and people with dark skin. They think about it A Lot.
46
We did go and buy a nice new 12-ga., but that's because we want to shoot skeet. Still, never hurts to have it handy and know how to use it. Don't see any need to buy an assault rifle; if things ever really go to shit, the nuts will all be shooting each other and the damn things will be lying in the street free for the taking. You'll just need to clean the excess tissue off of them.
47
@46 -- are you nuts? That isn't "excess tissue", that's much-needed protein! You don't clean that off, you EAT it.
48
44
You can have a bunker right in the middle of the city, if you have a basement, a nice place to wait things out a couple of weeks.
You can have a bunker right in the middle of the city, if you have a basement, a nice place to wait things out a couple of weeks.
50
44
How long will it take the Gentle Peoples' Commune to get a crop in? Six months? That's a lot of stomach growling in the meantime. And what if some mean person comes along and plucks the crop just as it is ready to harvest? KumBaYa.
How long will it take the Gentle Peoples' Commune to get a crop in? Six months? That's a lot of stomach growling in the meantime. And what if some mean person comes along and plucks the crop just as it is ready to harvest? KumBaYa.
51
40
41
I admire your optimism, if not your realism.
New Orleans was a dysfunctional 3rd world stinkhole of corruption and a murderers' den before Katrina. More so after.
And this 'wide world of interest and opportunity'- does it include staying off the streets at night to avoid getting your gay head bashed in? And dodging the regular Gangsta shootings? I'm sure that a scarcity of basic necessities will put everyone on their extra best behavior.
What the new world is going to be about is the end of the bankrupt welfare state and everyone who depends on it's titties is going to have to adjust.
The 'government is the answer' crowd will be crying 'mommy!'.
The 'get the government out of my life' crowd will be celebrating Independence Day.
41
I admire your optimism, if not your realism.
New Orleans was a dysfunctional 3rd world stinkhole of corruption and a murderers' den before Katrina. More so after.
And this 'wide world of interest and opportunity'- does it include staying off the streets at night to avoid getting your gay head bashed in? And dodging the regular Gangsta shootings? I'm sure that a scarcity of basic necessities will put everyone on their extra best behavior.
What the new world is going to be about is the end of the bankrupt welfare state and everyone who depends on it's titties is going to have to adjust.
The 'government is the answer' crowd will be crying 'mommy!'.
The 'get the government out of my life' crowd will be celebrating Independence Day.
52
Goddamnit, houses in San Francisco don't HAVE basements! Is that why all us pansy lefties live here?
54
@50:
Again you make the mistake of assuming whatever fantasy catastrophe occurs will happen in a very short span of time, which, if one is projecting on a global, as opposed to a purely local scale, is highly unlikely. Six months is a mere eye-blink if one is formulating a survival plan for the former.
Also, the GPC will no doubt post watch over their valuable crops, which rather precludes anyone vicious enough to induce such damage from doing so. Whatever their other faults, people are generally smart enough to know how to protect their investment, particularly when they're sharing a collective risk.
Again you make the mistake of assuming whatever fantasy catastrophe occurs will happen in a very short span of time, which, if one is projecting on a global, as opposed to a purely local scale, is highly unlikely. Six months is a mere eye-blink if one is formulating a survival plan for the former.
Also, the GPC will no doubt post watch over their valuable crops, which rather precludes anyone vicious enough to induce such damage from doing so. Whatever their other faults, people are generally smart enough to know how to protect their investment, particularly when they're sharing a collective risk.
55
If the shit goes down, I'm taking off all my clothes, painting myself green and setting the Fairmont Olympic on fire. Fuck this survival shit, I'm going out in style!
56
Doomsday scenarios are just ammo porn. Fun to envision, but in the end you've just wasted an otherwise useful half hour. Go work to make the country a better place, you fucking whiners.
57
I've got a Hammer and it's a 7'4" surfboard.
And I've got a gun, an 8'6" Waileio board.
All I need are some tasty waves, Mr. Hand.
On the other Hand, you should all sign up for the two year wait list for a p-patch. Or start building basement/stockpiles in your backyard for survivors to miraculously stumble upon under your grass, like the guy and his kid in The Road.
We're all going to DIE. Eventually. It'd be nice to make the intervening time more pleasant and enjoyable.
And I've got a gun, an 8'6" Waileio board.
All I need are some tasty waves, Mr. Hand.
On the other Hand, you should all sign up for the two year wait list for a p-patch. Or start building basement/stockpiles in your backyard for survivors to miraculously stumble upon under your grass, like the guy and his kid in The Road.
We're all going to DIE. Eventually. It'd be nice to make the intervening time more pleasant and enjoyable.
59
@58:
Keeping ones head prudently down in the midst of a hypothetical catastrophe isn't exactly the same thing as being meek; for one thing it rather belies the admonition to be "humbly submissive" as suggested in Yeshua's beatitude.
Keeping ones head prudently down in the midst of a hypothetical catastrophe isn't exactly the same thing as being meek; for one thing it rather belies the admonition to be "humbly submissive" as suggested in Yeshua's beatitude.
60
@47 - Fnarf, I just said clean it off, I didn't say how. If it's fresh, certainly licking it clean is an option. If you don't mind the smell of gun oil and burnt powder.
61
55, please - not the Olympic! How about the new Four Seasons, or the Westin? They're much more deserving of an act of suicidal arson.
62
does everybody already know that ecb has a court hearing next week for allegedly stealing a bottle of wine from a broadway qfc or is that old news now?
64
During the last major race riot we had here in Shreveport back in the eighties,the rioters burned down their own neighborhoods/liquor stores,but did not dare to venture anywhere near the (heavily armed) white areas.The reason was quite simple-THEY WOULD HAVE GOTTEN THEIR HEADS BLOWN OFF.Law enforcement may be reluctant to open fire on rioters,but we have absolutely no problem at all with it.
65
Yes #62 we all do isn't the silence strange from the Stranger??? What if it was a person they have decided is not one of them it would be front page.
66
IF it all goes down, most of you will only have your biting quips and clever zings. I, on the other hand have guns. Several of them. And I'm buying more all the time.
I'm not too different from most of you. I'm mostly a liberal. I live on capitol hill. I use only mass transit or my feet. I read the stranger every week. I listen to NPR or KEXP on the weekends before strolling to a coffee shop. I proudly voted for Obama and partied with you on election night at pike/broadway. I read Vice Do's/Don'ts religiously. I love sunlight.
But if our currently unstable world economy truly collapses, that's the day that I change from a compassionate liberal to a Machiavellian. I tell my friends to buy guns, but you all have ensured that Capitol Hill is almost devoid of firearms and my currency is all the more powerful. And I'm not going to hole-up and just defend myself if necessary, I'M COMING TO TAKE YOUR FOOD. Texas would have competition, but Cap Hill is an Apocalyptic Oyster!
I'm thankful that society and police allow us to have fairly safe lives in Seattle circa 2009, but nothing on planet earth has every guaranteed any organism a fair, happy, or long life. This has been true forever from the ant you stepped on while going to work to the billions of women in history that accepted rape as a fact of life. Even a house cat has claws, so do I, you should too.
GUNS ARE THE GREAT EQUALIZER. For the first time in history a sub 5ft., sub 100LBS woman can be just as deadly of a force as a muscle man. Frail, spindly-legged, girl-pants clad hipster boys REJOICE!
Besides, we can't just let the christians, rednecks, and breeders be the only ones left to inherit the earth. The new world will need drummers, gays, goths, and baristas.
More...
I'm not too different from most of you. I'm mostly a liberal. I live on capitol hill. I use only mass transit or my feet. I read the stranger every week. I listen to NPR or KEXP on the weekends before strolling to a coffee shop. I proudly voted for Obama and partied with you on election night at pike/broadway. I read Vice Do's/Don'ts religiously. I love sunlight.
But if our currently unstable world economy truly collapses, that's the day that I change from a compassionate liberal to a Machiavellian. I tell my friends to buy guns, but you all have ensured that Capitol Hill is almost devoid of firearms and my currency is all the more powerful. And I'm not going to hole-up and just defend myself if necessary, I'M COMING TO TAKE YOUR FOOD. Texas would have competition, but Cap Hill is an Apocalyptic Oyster!
I'm thankful that society and police allow us to have fairly safe lives in Seattle circa 2009, but nothing on planet earth has every guaranteed any organism a fair, happy, or long life. This has been true forever from the ant you stepped on while going to work to the billions of women in history that accepted rape as a fact of life. Even a house cat has claws, so do I, you should too.
GUNS ARE THE GREAT EQUALIZER. For the first time in history a sub 5ft., sub 100LBS woman can be just as deadly of a force as a muscle man. Frail, spindly-legged, girl-pants clad hipster boys REJOICE!
Besides, we can't just let the christians, rednecks, and breeders be the only ones left to inherit the earth. The new world will need drummers, gays, goths, and baristas.
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