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Friday, February 27, 2009

Drunk All Kinds of Bad Ideas Wrapped Up in One

Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Feb 27, 2009 at 5:47 PM

9b19/1235771666-shotgun.jpg Oh lord. I'm not convinced that developing an even faster way to get drunk is a good idea. I'm also not convinced that you want drunks to continually shoot themselves in the mouth.

Armed with the Alcohol Shot Gun, you can re-enact the most memorable movie scenes from "Dirty Harry" to "Matrix". "Do you feel lucky, sucker" is the only question? Pour in an ounce of your favorite drink into the cartridge, cock the trigger, point and shoot.

Still and all: It's probably safer than Jell-O shots, if just because you have to be able to have the manual dexterity to reload the goddamned thing time after time.

Comments (15) RSS

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I remember when the Off Ramp used to sell $2 shots of ice cold Jagear or Goldschlager in test tubes. You just poured it down your gullet so you wouldn't taste the alcohol.

Posted by elswinger on February 27, 2009 at 5:57 PM

Will drinking ever NOT be cool? I ask you.

Posted by Jude Fawley on February 27, 2009 at 6:00 PM

Unless the alcohol is going to reach a velocity that allows it to punch through the back of someone's cranium, I really don't see how this would "re-enact" famous action movie scenes.

Posted by COMTE on February 27, 2009 at 6:24 PM

Drunks will like what I tell them to like.

Posted by Homer on February 27, 2009 at 6:25 PM

Wouldn't a squirt-gun produce the same effect..?

Posted by Dcal on February 27, 2009 at 6:26 PM

Because alcohol and guns are a great party combination...

Posted by Bruce Garrett on February 27, 2009 at 6:39 PM

Isn't the Eastwood quote "punk"... not "sucker"?

Posted by Porkchop Sandwiches! on February 27, 2009 at 6:53 PM

Please DO NOT (as is suggested above) use squirtguns or other non-food-grade plastic with alcohol.

All sorts of nasty stuff may leech out - alcohol is a very effective solvent.

Posted by John Galt on February 27, 2009 at 7:14 PM

Alcohol Shot Gun = Booze in watergun

Snuggie = Backwards bathrobe

Posted by Matthew on February 27, 2009 at 7:16 PM

Sounds like a it will be hit at Puget Sound Pizza parlors...that is if you can pull the reefer out of their mouths...

Posted by P.S. Retards on February 27, 2009 at 8:17 PM

I can see all sorts of bad things happening at parties raided by the police . . .

Posted by whatevermind on February 27, 2009 at 8:23 PM

This is far from the worst idea spawned by alcohol.

Posted by Greg on February 27, 2009 at 9:42 PM

Uhh, my guess is that *this* idea was spawned by pot, for the purposes of drinking alcohol.

Posted by mixing metaphors on February 28, 2009 at 12:53 AM

How's Rize? You know Rize?

I don't know no liquor named Rize.

Rize. Come on, get out of here, man. You don't know any booze by the name of Rize?

I don't know no booze named Rize. Get back to your fuckin' tribe before you get hurt. Do me a favor. I don't want no trouble. Okay?

You got an Alcohol Shot Gun?

Get the fuck out of here, man. Get outta here!

SUCK ON THIS!

And no, I don't feel like letting it go.

Posted by The Incredible Sulk on February 28, 2009 at 11:14 AM

@10-
You should really try correct grammar when attempting to sound haughty and righteous.

Posted by P.S. to Retarded Commenter on March 1, 2009 at 3:09 PM