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News & ArtsWednesday, February 25, 2009
Sex OCTOPUSSY!!!
Posted by Dan Savage on Wed, Feb 25, 2009 at 7:33 PM
I prefer "Octocon" myself. But the blogosphere, in its wisdom, has settled on "Octopussy," and who am I to argue?
Anyway, this should've been up on Slog hours and hours ago: Vivid Entertainment, the hetero porn outfit, has offered Nadya Suleman, mother of 14 and the worst person in the world after her "infertility" docs, $1 million dollars to make a porno. Just one. (One million, one video.) And now some folks are offering her a million diapers or something to keep her from doing it. More than you want to know at TMZ.
My suggestion for a co-star: Ron Jeremy, of course. Because this is a gross-out flick, right?
3
"Fearing that Nadya Suleman "will become the subject of endless ridicule and scorn," the president of Pink Visual..."
wait? isn't she already the subject of endless ridicule and scorn? how would this be different?
wait? isn't she already the subject of endless ridicule and scorn? how would this be different?
4
I think that a clown gangbang would be most appropriate. "Puttin' the clowns back into the Octo-Clown Car."
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the name of the movie should be "QUIMFULL," my personal favorite play on "quiverfull." and have you SEEN the trauma to this woman's abdomen? www.tmz.com/octomom-it-was-a-very-goodye…
and she's given birth to TWO litters. i wanted and got surgery just to correct the after-affects of twins on my body, so you can just imagine....be glad you're male--let's leave it at that. any male co-star would need a bag on HIS head to do the deed to completion, i would think. or, i would rather not think, come to think of it.
and she's given birth to TWO litters. i wanted and got surgery just to correct the after-affects of twins on my body, so you can just imagine....be glad you're male--let's leave it at that. any male co-star would need a bag on HIS head to do the deed to completion, i would think. or, i would rather not think, come to think of it.
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yeah, octopussy is PG too, but no one thinks it means pussy cat in this case. but if octopussy gets used in the MSM i don't give a fuck i'll be happy.
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If she doesn't take the money it only adds to her apparent utter disregard for the future well-being of her children. Her entire family is already going to (deservedly) be the object of ridicule and scorn forever. She might as well get the money to give her kids a decent start out of it.
Seriously, why is this woman being rewarded with celebrity instead of fourteen counts of child molestation? The damage she's going to do to each and every one of those children just by being their mother amounts to the same thing.
Seriously, why is this woman being rewarded with celebrity instead of fourteen counts of child molestation? The damage she's going to do to each and every one of those children just by being their mother amounts to the same thing.
16
That woman is a Saint and you all know it! Leave Her Alone (Chris Crocker where are you?). She, unlike other humans but not unlike all cats and dogs was able to have a litter of children. It's like Moglee being raised by wolfs only different.
And now they want to besmirch that holy of holy acts, Hetero people having babies, by offering her a million dollars to PRETEND like she's making more babies. It's immoral. Shocking and shows to what depths America has sunk.
I blame the Gays, and after them the Jews.
And now they want to besmirch that holy of holy acts, Hetero people having babies, by offering her a million dollars to PRETEND like she's making more babies. It's immoral. Shocking and shows to what depths America has sunk.
I blame the Gays, and after them the Jews.
18
Hey, if babies couldn't fill the void in her soul, I'm guessing fucking a bunch of strangers on camera sure will...
19
If this whoa pushed out eight babies at one sitting, then who is going to want to see her vagina in a porn movie.
She has to have some serious leakage going on...yuck.
She has to have some serious leakage going on...yuck.
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Her fifteen minutes can't end soon enough for me.
@20 - exactly.
And we wonder why "they" hate us...
@20 - exactly.
And we wonder why "they" hate us...
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My hope is that they'll include some good lactating shots...the thought of Octopussy squirting a jet of calcium all over some guy's massive schlong gives me a...well, not a stiffy, exactly. Call it a semi.
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19
Leakage?
What stinking leakage?
We're all goping to leak anyway so go ahead, shove your fist up your rectum several times a day!
Carpe Anum!
Leakage?
What stinking leakage?
We're all goping to leak anyway so go ahead, shove your fist up your rectum several times a day!
Carpe Anum!
28
Ew! I just can't imagine why anyone would want to see it except out of curiosity. And I, for one, am just not that curious. And I dislike her so much, I wouldn't want to encourage her by paying her for anything. She IS a clown car.
30
Do NOT defile James Bond by calling this fetis factory Octopussy.
Let's face it, Octomom is no Maude Adams.
Let's face it, Octomom is no Maude Adams.
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What possible attraction could there be to a woman who has borne 14 children? Sure, there's the whole "circus freak" angle, but is this woman really "sexy" enough for porn?
Ewww. Some guy is really going to pay for this video and then go home and beat off to her face and body? Just imagine the stretch marks she has!!
Thank. God. I. Am. Gay.
Ewww. Some guy is really going to pay for this video and then go home and beat off to her face and body? Just imagine the stretch marks she has!!
Thank. God. I. Am. Gay.
34
Oh my goodness, FYI, you don't push twins or triplets out at the same time! With a good midwife or OB and some good child birth preparation, you can reduce the severity of damage to the vaginal wall. Also, multiple babies are usually born at about 39 weeks if they're lucky, usually it's sooner than that, so they're smaller than usual. Also, I think it is pretty obvious that this octuplet mom would have had a c-section, I think some of those babies were bound to be breech and it is probably safer to deliver 8 babies via c-section otherwise the lady could have hemorrhaged/bled out.
Needless to say, I think it was totally irresponsible for everyone involved to let her keep all 8 babies and I hope she goes into the porn business so taxpayers won't have to pay for that mistake.
Needless to say, I think it was totally irresponsible for everyone involved to let her keep all 8 babies and I hope she goes into the porn business so taxpayers won't have to pay for that mistake.
35
FTW.
I just want to insert an incredibly unrelated note here: there's a PTA rally at the Capital at noon today, only now with all the weather and school delays, it's going to be essentially impossible for most parents that have tots to attend. Damn it. If we wind up having to fire 10,000 teachers it's going to suuuuuuuuck.
Just wanted to put something in there that's pretty much as far away from Octopussy lactating all over Ron Jeremy as is physically possible.
...I hope she goes into the porn business so taxpayers won't have to pay for that mistake.
FTW.
I just want to insert an incredibly unrelated note here: there's a PTA rally at the Capital at noon today, only now with all the weather and school delays, it's going to be essentially impossible for most parents that have tots to attend. Damn it. If we wind up having to fire 10,000 teachers it's going to suuuuuuuuck.
Just wanted to put something in there that's pretty much as far away from Octopussy lactating all over Ron Jeremy as is physically possible.
36
The foolish and catty gay men who post here a lot here - do not have a clue.
They need to shut up, and thank God for all of us, they are not in charge of the lives of women.
The affair will be debated for a while, but, mom is entitled to her reproductive choices. Period. The kids are alive, - good, very good - and are now part of a living ongoing American legend, for good or bad.
She will get a big time money benefactor, soon.
If I lived near, I would help care for them for free.
Put that in your rectums.
They need to shut up, and thank God for all of us, they are not in charge of the lives of women.
The affair will be debated for a while, but, mom is entitled to her reproductive choices. Period. The kids are alive, - good, very good - and are now part of a living ongoing American legend, for good or bad.
She will get a big time money benefactor, soon.
If I lived near, I would help care for them for free.
Put that in your rectums.
37
What if she doesn't, Pat? What if no one rides in to rescue this lunatic? And if they do, doesn't it encourage psychos like this to do the same thing? I hope the kids have to be put up for adoption and are adopted by gay couples.
38
Denny's has announced the new Octopussy Grand Slam! 14 eggs, no sausage and your neighbor pays for it!
credit where credit is due, I saw that on http://michaelgabrielraphael.blogspot.co…
credit where credit is due, I saw that on http://michaelgabrielraphael.blogspot.co…
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@36
You say "The kids are alive, - good, very good," but you don't have to live that life. How do you think it would affect your emotional stability to know that your mother was essentially a crazy cat lady with a little more ambition? That you were a collected object and not a wanted human being?
You say that mom is entitled to her reproductive choices, but that's really a non-sequitur; no one is questioning her right to reproduce, only her decision to do so when she so clearly can't live up to the responsibilities that it entails. The right to do something doesn't mean you don't have to face the consequences of doing it, and in this case the consequences include fourteen children who are going to have a very rough start and probably be scarred for life.
And even if a wealthy benefactor does step in, what then? A life of unwanted obligation? That's not much better. It also doesn't address the millions of other women who have children they can't adequately care for. There aren't enough wealthy benefactors to go around, I'm afraid, and showing people that they can get away with this kind of grotesque self-indulgence is only going to do harm.
You say "The kids are alive, - good, very good," but you don't have to live that life. How do you think it would affect your emotional stability to know that your mother was essentially a crazy cat lady with a little more ambition? That you were a collected object and not a wanted human being?
You say that mom is entitled to her reproductive choices, but that's really a non-sequitur; no one is questioning her right to reproduce, only her decision to do so when she so clearly can't live up to the responsibilities that it entails. The right to do something doesn't mean you don't have to face the consequences of doing it, and in this case the consequences include fourteen children who are going to have a very rough start and probably be scarred for life.
And even if a wealthy benefactor does step in, what then? A life of unwanted obligation? That's not much better. It also doesn't address the millions of other women who have children they can't adequately care for. There aren't enough wealthy benefactors to go around, I'm afraid, and showing people that they can get away with this kind of grotesque self-indulgence is only going to do harm.
43
Go back and read #36 above, but this time read it like Floyd the Barber from the Andy Griffith show.
...good, very goooooddd...
...good, very goooooddd...
45
A million diapers? What would she do with a million diapers? Even if each of those 14 kids uses three a day for the first four years of their lives, she wouldn't need a tenth that many. And she can't exactly use the remaining diapers to pay the rent or feed her children.
Can people even think any more?
Can people even think any more?
46
44 - condoms are a requirement in the porn industry. Besides, when's the last time you saw a porno where the actually actually ejaculates up a woman's twat?
47
We don't need her knocked up again.
What the hell do you mean "we," kemosabe? As far as I can see, it doesn't affect anyone on this blog in any way whatsoever!
What the hell do you mean "we," kemosabe? As far as I can see, it doesn't affect anyone on this blog in any way whatsoever!
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@46: you don't watch a lot of porn, do you? Google "bareback." Google "creampie." But not from work.
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@47: yes it does effect all of us, because GUARANTEED this women will be on public assistance, which means you and I demonstrably pay for it.
One of the things that is particularly annoying about this thread is that right wing pro-life fucknuts like @36 are HIGHLY CORRELATED with people who hate the social safety net, so the very people who argue how wonderful it is that this woman has 14 kids and no job and no partner are the ones who would dismantle any organizational way to provide help for this woman, or at least for her children through child protective services (which they also see as an intrusive organ of the state.)
One of the things that is particularly annoying about this thread is that right wing pro-life fucknuts like @36 are HIGHLY CORRELATED with people who hate the social safety net, so the very people who argue how wonderful it is that this woman has 14 kids and no job and no partner are the ones who would dismantle any organizational way to provide help for this woman, or at least for her children through child protective services (which they also see as an intrusive organ of the state.)
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@45 - You could easily go through 10 diapers a day per child (as they become toddlers, less, but still quite a lot per day). So, 10 diapers per baby x 8 babies (plus any other toddlers in the house?) x 3.5 years (average) = 102,200. So, yes, about a tenth like you mentioned. She could sell the rest to make enough money for the next round of invitro...
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