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Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Homo Really, Who Doesn’t Hate Log Cabin Republicans?

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Feb 17, 2009 at 6:19 PM

Liberal gays think Log Cabin Republicans are hypocritical asswipes, and some Republicans don’t like them, either. Americans for Truth About Homosexuality—“devoted exclusively to exposing and countering the homosexual activist agenda”—is calling on Republican National Committee chairman Michael Steele to reject the LCR. Here is a letter by AfTAH writer Allyson Smith:

I just spoke with a staffer at RNC chairman Michael Steele’s office and explained to her about the Log Cabin Republicans and their nefarious activities. [The staffer] thanked me for the call and asked me to ask all of you to call in to ask Michael Steele to NOT give any accommodation or quarter to LCR members within GOP ranks. He assured me that my message would be passed on to Chairman Steele. I gave her the following talking points and urge you all to call in and repeat them:

• Log Cabin Republicans are homosexual activists first, Republicans second.

• Because they are homosexual activists above all else, LCR members actively work to oppose the party’s plank on traditional marriage.

• California Log Cabin members actively worked to oppose Proposition 8, even as the GOP supported it.

• [Lesbian columnist] Deb Price recently wrote an article saying that LCR members are cheering Michael Steele’s election. To people like me, that is a red flag and cause for alarm.

• The GOP likes to pride itself on being the “big tent” party. However, when you admit so many members without discretion, you end up with people who think 180 degrees differently from the platform and then end up with a house divided against itself—and we all know what happens then.

• The key to the GOP regaining its power and membership is NOT to tack more to the left, but to reclaim and stick to its platform and get rid of people who work against the platform.

I'm all in support of the strategy. Republicans need to thin the ranks, drop the baggage, jettison the gays. I know a few straight Republicans who are fine with the gays—lose them too. Boil it down to only the pure of heart, the last 26 percent of the US population who identify as Evangelical Christians. Rally against my evil lifestyle.

Be it known that my homosexual agenda tonight involves baking Chili Relleno stuffed with roasted chicken and topped with chipotle cream sauce. It’s been exposed! And nobody—not even Michael Steele—can stop me.

Comments (47) RSS

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Ooh can I have that recipe? Or is that code for something very dirty?

Posted by St. Beretta on February 17, 2009 at 6:22 PM

Dominic, your agenda sounds delicious.

Posted by jsteel2005 on February 17, 2009 at 6:24 PM

This post made my heart sing. The Republicans are going to be a long, long, long time in the wilderness.

Posted by Big Sven on February 17, 2009 at 6:26 PM

I approve of your agenda, Dominic, and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Posted by Abby on February 17, 2009 at 6:27 PM

I find the whole notion of your agenda nothing but culinary suicide by over indulgence in ethnic food. We can't have that, it's not Republican.

Posted by Sargon Bighorn on February 17, 2009 at 6:36 PM

dude i am kicking you out of the parade and revoking your rainbow trapper-keeper. the homosexual agenda for this evening is clearly beer and fancy pizza. clearly.

Posted by james jackhammer on February 17, 2009 at 6:38 PM

I agree with 4, and Dominic. Perhaps we should start a Twitter site or something called the 'gay agenda.'

For instance, my gay agenda today included studying for four hours, then going out for Mexican with some other gays.

It would be a good example of how stupid the idea that we have such an agenda actually is.

Posted by Dean Venture on February 17, 2009 at 6:47 PM

My homosexual agenda today included hanging out with my standard poodle and making okra pancakes and a chiffonade of collard greens w/minced scotch bonnet pepper and lemon juice. I know! My agenda was slightly different b/c I live south of the Mason-Dixon line.

Posted by Balt-O-Matt on February 17, 2009 at 6:57 PM

My Homosexual Agenda for Today: Solid day of work, helping son with term paper, folding laundry.

Viva la revolution!

Posted by jackseattle on February 17, 2009 at 7:00 PM

3
The whole nation is in for a long long time in the wilderness.
The GOP is in a position to weather it better than most.
Blaming Bush won't cut it as a strategy forever.
See you on the other side...

Posted by hasta la vista, baby! on February 17, 2009 at 7:07 PM

My gay agenda today has included fittings for a bride I'm dressing, an especially good blood orange, immense love for my spouse and our pets, and Flower Drum Song on TCM!

Posted by itsmarkmitchell on February 17, 2009 at 7:10 PM

This group's attitude reminds me of that quote from "Ninotchka", where Greta Garbo plays a Russian spy: "The last mass trials were a great success. There are going to be fewer but better Russians."

Once the Republican party kicks everybody out, they will achieve ultimate perfection!

Posted by Matt in PDX on February 17, 2009 at 7:11 PM

I forgot about my gay agenda for the evening: watching "Peyton Place". Last night it was "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls". Homophobes everywhere tremble...

Posted by Matt in PDX on February 17, 2009 at 7:13 PM

It makes you kind of feel sad for the LCR.
Realize that this comes from Americans for Truth About Homosexuality and not the Republican Party.
Would not be a good move for Republicans since people have been leaping off the Republican bandwagon all year and homosexuals probably represent their best bet to stir things up with the Dems and even get a lot of new support after Obama's big FU to the gays.
Truely, most gays would be Republicans if they not have to grow up being gay.
The people writing this letter don't care about Republicans. These people from this group fear their own homosexual feelings and think every other person has the same feelings that they must repress. But guess what? They don't!
And, no, LCR's are Republicans First and Homosexuals Activists Last. Even they would admit that.

Posted by you can't handle the truth! on February 17, 2009 at 7:34 PM

@3. They said that about the GOP in 1975. I hope you're right, but... Remember Gingrich in 94? The Republicans have a zombie-like ability to revive. As 10 says, the "wilderness" right now is an economic one that stretches before us all (thanks to Reaganomics (1981-2009, RIP) and a Wartime Economy since the 1950s).

Posted by Forest for the Trees on February 17, 2009 at 7:48 PM

My gay agenda for the night: get milk, make supper, homework with kids, tuck them in, have a beer, watch a movie with boyfriend.

Oh, and I'll be busy until midnight plotting the downfall of the American family. It's a new hobby of mine.

Posted by J.T.R. on February 17, 2009 at 8:02 PM

The LCR are a bunch of warmongering, reactionary, racist and anti working class white boys who happen to be gay. No matter how anti gay the rethugs are they will crawl on their bellys to the gop. They are like that group of gay catholics called dignity who cling to the catholic church even though they do not want them. I think part of what is going on here is internalized homobpobia.

Posted by Ron on February 17, 2009 at 8:03 PM

My gay agenda for today was teaching 6 hours of music lessons and trying to grocery shop on my way home. (Safeway is too heterosexual -- they didn't have Bob's Red Mill oat flour. For homosexual pancake batter, replace half the flour with oat flour. Homosexualicious!)

Posted by this guy I know in Spokane on February 17, 2009 at 8:06 PM

My gay agenda included nipping home at lunchtime to check on my sick partner, shovelling the walk, and calling my mother-in-law for a nice long chat.

Posted by Pam on February 17, 2009 at 8:09 PM

My gay agenda for today was to survive the flu, watch a lot of reruns, enjoy my partner visiting me at lunchtime, being grateful that I didn't have to shovel the walk, and listening to her sympathize with her ex-husband's mother on the phone for an hour.

Posted by Boo on February 17, 2009 at 8:27 PM

My gay agenda for tonight: slack off and play Left 4 Dead.

Posted by Sara on February 17, 2009 at 8:31 PM

Dammit. This sort of makes me wish I had a homosexual agenda. I am in Boston right now, so I guess I could get gay married if I wanted to. City Hall is probably closed, though, so I guess I'll just have to stick with my straight agenda of ironing my clothes for tomorrow while watching the Colbert Report.

Posted by Julie in Eugene on February 17, 2009 at 8:41 PM

Well, I hope we can eventually get a new (and, obviously, better) opposition party sometime soon.

I mean, I'm all for partisanship, but you've *got* to do better than this?

Posted by Lee on February 17, 2009 at 8:41 PM

Man, I'm (somewhat) straight and I still have a homosexual agenda. Right now item 1 on the agenda is drinking beer to help me calm down about how pissed off I am that Metro stranded me at the University earlier when the 44 and 48 went down (and they screwed the pooch on picking up the slack) and made me miss a meetup where I was supposed to argue with and ultimately humiliate creationists.

That's my homosexual agenda: make myself some supper and drink beer. AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME. (No power in the 'verse can stop me.)

Posted by john on February 17, 2009 at 9:04 PM

@18

Hmm, oat flour, you say? How gay intriguing! It sounds homo delicious! I will have to give it a queer try.

Posted by i would like some man syrup on my gaycakes on February 17, 2009 at 9:06 PM

Traditional marriage in the GOP = wife swallowing fistfuls of pills to cope with knowledge that husband is out trolling public restrooms. Or elementary schools.

Posted by BestBeforeEnd on February 17, 2009 at 9:09 PM

My bi-sexual agenda is to subtly nag lesbian fuck buddy into quitting smoking, by pointing out that a carton of Marlboro Lights are around twenty bucks a carton and she goes through at least a pack and a half a day. Will also point out that smoking is an expensive habit if your hours have been cut and you're in danger of getting laid off.

Posted by Northanger Abbey Would Be Better With Zombies on February 17, 2009 at 9:11 PM

As a hetero, my gay agenda consisted of watching Xanadu and listening to Scissor Sisters while washing dishes.

Posted by Robin Sparkles on February 17, 2009 at 9:30 PM

I raise people's consciousness about equal rights for gays by constantly shouting "Look at me! I fuck butt!"

Posted by BestBeforeEnd on February 17, 2009 at 9:56 PM

@27: Wait, what? You're encouraging people to spent *less*???

COMMIE!!!1ELEVEN!!!!

Tax cuts will solve everything?

Posted by Lee on February 17, 2009 at 9:57 PM

@10: who's blaming Bush? Fuck you, get lost.

Posted by Big Sven on February 17, 2009 at 10:18 PM

my homo agenda includes foie gras relenos and watching rachel maddow

Posted by log cabin geese on February 17, 2009 at 11:10 PM

The republicans do not have any zombie-like ability to revive. The Democrats have an ability to fuck up a good thing when it's handed to them on a silver fucking platter. Just don't fuck this up and you can hold onto all branches of the government for a good long time. I want to see conservatism and christian conservatism marginalized.

Posted by Luke Baggins on February 17, 2009 at 11:36 PM

My hetero agenda is to watch Swingtown. Has anyone seen that? I guess as urban hipsters, we're required to look down upon anything that people in the suburbs have access to. But this show is pretty cool. Everyone should check it out. What's wierd is how all that 70's shit looks completely normal.

Posted by Luke Baggins on February 17, 2009 at 11:38 PM

As a hard traditionalist, I trust that Michael Steele, Sarah Palin, David Vitter, and other hard traditionalist patriots are the moral center of America who will protect her from Marxist homosexual non-citizen incompetents like Barack Hussein Obama, and clean up the mess he leaves behind.

LCR homosexuals ARE homosexuals first, so while they are right thinking on issues like taxes and small government, their aim is to convert our children to homosexuality. That's the only way their movement can grow.

Posted by Lord Basil on February 18, 2009 at 12:38 AM

Too much, Basil. The key to performance art is to not let it slip into caricature.

Posted by Big Sven on February 18, 2009 at 6:50 AM

My gay agenda for today is to go to work and see what stinkbombs may have gone off over the last four days, and then stop by a few construction sites, where I will undoubtedly fantasize about recruiting some new members.

All of this time, I will be looking and acting as butch as I possibly can. But on the inside, I will be quivering with anticipation over the arrival of what is - to me, at least - the gayest lamp in the world. I bought it for myself for my birthday from the eBays!

Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay on February 18, 2009 at 7:12 AM

My nefarious homosexual activities last night included making a delicious roasted red pepper soup and watching Foyle's War (a dirty British series that secretly promotes the homosexual agenda) with my boyfriend of eight years, before retiring to bed at 10:00.

Posted by The First Darrin on February 18, 2009 at 7:16 AM

So Dom, how did the rellenos turn out?

Posted by Mike in MO on February 18, 2009 at 7:21 AM

My bi agenda tonight includes Yoga class & a jog with my doggie.

Posted by Mike in MO on February 18, 2009 at 7:23 AM

My sexuality nuetral agenda last night involved fried rice, geek love and watching sportscenter while doing my eliptical at the gym.

Posted by Joh on February 18, 2009 at 7:31 AM

My heterosexual agenda for tonight is to make some black bean and sweet potato enchiladas for dinner and spend some quality time playing my stratocaster.

Posted by kim in portland (formerly just kim) on February 18, 2009 at 8:39 AM

The Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat:
http://www.xmission.com/~emailbox/gingha…

Posted by Inkweary on February 18, 2009 at 12:49 PM

HA! Gay agenda? Get 4 gays together and they can't even decide where to go to dinner. Get a half million of them together and they can't run a halfway organized campaign against a law to strip them of their rights. Gays should really get an agenda and try to get organized. Seriously people, get your shit together. If you're going to be perpetually accused of pushing a radical agenda you might as well really push your radical agenda. Learn from previous civil rights organizations and really make a difference.

Posted by Colin on February 18, 2009 at 2:50 PM

P.S. My gay agenda for the day is an afterwork, pre-vacation electric tan, alter a bride's maid gown to fit a drag queen, and pick out the books I am going to take on afore-mentioned vacation.

Posted by Inkweary on February 18, 2009 at 3:55 PM

My gay agenda today was to feed the cats, scoop the litter boxes, run the diswasher and put them away, work 8+ hours on scripts for the office, review some tax forms and read a few blogs.

Posted by MikeSF on February 18, 2009 at 4:51 PM

I worked with a few other drag queens to make sure Charles Stadtlander didn't get elected to Atlanta City Council. His fear of a drag queen uprising (which I explained to him I would help to achieve) led him to withdraw once another nicer gay man entered the race.

Another victory for equality.

Ms. LaReina
www.lareina.tv

Posted by Ms. LaReina on April 30, 2009 at 1:58 PM