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Monday, January 12, 2009

??!! / Sex / Teh Internets Free Oral Sex!

Posted by Kelly O on Mon, Jan 12, 2009 at 5:14 PM

You heard me. FREE ORAL SEX. Well, that is, if you're a clean female in the Louisville Kentucky area.

Meet George Kistner. Sometimes he looks like Kid Rock... sometimes he looks like a vampire. Shoot, sometimes he even puts on a suit.

So hey, this is your big chance! If you're one of the millions of women who love oral sex, APPLY NOW*!

*Some restrictions apply. Must purchase your own plane ticket to Louisville.

Comments (31) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

Isn't this standard on Craigslist? In m4m, at least...

Posted by Roberts on January 12, 2009 at 5:22 PM

"No offense meant to any of you, but you must be clean and not smell bad. ... If I cannot breath [sic], I cannot help you. Also, I will not go down on anyone who is on the rag unless we are dating. Sorry for the inconvenience."

Thanks for making my day!

Posted by Emily on January 12, 2009 at 5:23 PM

Who could resist a fellow with a Burning Sigil of Baphomet tattooed on his chest?

Posted by Fnarf on January 12, 2009 at 5:27 PM

I wish him luck.

Posted by Urgutha Forka on January 12, 2009 at 5:27 PM

@3, if you even tried resisting his Baphomet tattoo, chances are still good you'd be rendered powerless by his "died an off form of magenta" hair and his 154 IQ.

Posted by Emily on January 12, 2009 at 5:30 PM

"You should let your friends know about your experience if you have a good time. "

This guy needs his own VH1 reality show!

Posted by Megan Seling on January 12, 2009 at 5:32 PM

Kind of a throwback to the good old Internet days of "I Kiss You!" and the guy who dresses like Peter Pan.

Posted by Fnarf on January 12, 2009 at 5:36 PM

I didn't know it was imprisoned.

Posted by Will in Seattle on January 12, 2009 at 5:36 PM

I can't believe he just gives it away like that. Slut.

Posted by seandr on January 12, 2009 at 5:37 PM

Now THERE'S a reality show.

"Who wants a little head?"

Contestants could compete...

Posted by Max Bell on January 12, 2009 at 5:38 PM

Oh crap. He has a myspace too. Of course.
http://www.myspace.com/baphomet69

Posted by KELLY O on January 12, 2009 at 5:39 PM

Hold on, why is my wife friends with him on Facebook?

Posted by seandr on January 12, 2009 at 5:39 PM

Kelly this is so old.

You are behind the times, mam.

Posted by Arsenic7 on January 12, 2009 at 5:46 PM

To #12:

Maybe you shouldn't charge so much!

Posted by Arsenic7 on January 12, 2009 at 5:47 PM

This being Seattle, no one asked the obvious question.

Does he have a sister?

Posted by X Y Guy on January 12, 2009 at 6:19 PM

"Collections: Transformers (the toys), Swords & Medieval weaponry (temporarily out of my possession)"

Is it on loan to a museum? Or was it taken as collateral until he pays off his tattoo?

Posted by j m on January 12, 2009 at 6:27 PM

You SLOG guys-n-gals are so cute, I get the biggest chuckle out of you being so far behind posting stuff that's already been buzzing around the Interwebz for weeks...

Posted by MarkyMark on January 12, 2009 at 6:29 PM

FIRST!

Posted by Funky Bunch on January 12, 2009 at 7:06 PM

@12 too funny!! :)

Posted by Rondi on January 12, 2009 at 7:51 PM

Where are the testimonials? Does it come with Math Tutoring? So many questions, so little info!

Posted by Moxie on January 12, 2009 at 8:23 PM

i've never seen this. shit i lost the internet race. better spend more time on the internet.

Posted by what on January 12, 2009 at 8:34 PM

The Internet is a race. We lost.

Posted by Dan Savage on January 12, 2009 at 8:47 PM

cock shot please.

Posted by cynthia on January 12, 2009 at 10:07 PM

you guys gotta refresh buzzfeed more often

Posted by bryce beamish on January 12, 2009 at 10:35 PM

There's no space for testimonials on his website

Posted by If this really works I might try it on January 12, 2009 at 11:18 PM

Well, it's always nice to have a hobby, isn't it? Or a business on the side?

Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay on January 13, 2009 at 6:38 AM

i dont even know what to think of this guy... wow.

Posted by jess on January 13, 2009 at 7:58 AM

He's just been hired by Pajamas Media to cover the conflict in the Middle East.

Posted by Ben on January 13, 2009 at 9:18 AM

Here's a guy who knows how to get his offer out there.

Posted by Greg on January 13, 2009 at 10:00 AM

so many needy women

so little time

yes, a shower helps, male or female

very funny - but grounded in truth - a nephew told me he liked eating pussy and when the word got out while at Pac. Lutheran, the pretty girls lined up every night ...

of course, oral is not real sex, hence, virginity is intact ...

Posted by Tom on January 13, 2009 at 10:04 AM

Well, ladies... I've studied his interests: "Satanism, Vampirism, Fulfilling fantasies, enjoying myself".... Sorry, but even Hedonism and sex aren't trustworthy in this list... It's really scaring to sacrifice yourself even for the sake of the orgasm....

Posted by sex toy on July 14, 2009 at 5:32 AM