Find Your Valentine
Slog
News & ArtsFriday, January 9, 2009
Drugs / Books Smobriety, Three Years In
Posted by Paul Constant on Fri, Jan 9, 2009 at 2:12 PM
It's been three years since my last cigarette*, and I smoked a pack a day for the twelve years before that. I haven't been tempted at all since I quit smoking—I can stand right next to someone smoking a cigarette and not feel a compulsion to smoke—and I also think I've done a fine job, if I do say so myself, at not being obnoxious to smokers about quitting smoking. But once a year, I like to put this reminder up on Slog:
If you want to quit smoking—if you really want to quit smoking and you don't just think that you should quit smoking—it's not that hard. It's easier if you have a friend, particularly one you don't mind mocking and being mocked by. And you don't need any fancy drugs or gum or anything—I tried a pill and it wound up making me feel speedy so I stopped taking them almost immediately.
I recommend the holy hell out of this book:
When you're really ready, you'll know. And if you love someone who smokes, please don't nag them. I smoked an extra cigarette for every person who told me I was being stupid by smoking. It's a feedback loop of bad feelings. You smoke because you feel bad because this person is calling you bad because you smoke. All I'm saying is: it can be done. I'm proof, and so are the two friends I quit with. My friends have had a very few one-or-two-cigarette relapses since then, but they are also still non-smokers. I can assure you that none of us are in any way special when it comes to quitting smoking: in fact, I think we actually have worse-than-normal will power. Anyway: You can do it. Honest.
This concludes my yearly smobriety reminder.
*As a side note, it's been two years since I quit drinking coffee, and I had a 12-cup-a-day habit. I didn't plan on doing that: I got a ferocious stomach virus and realized, when it was all over, that I hadn't had coffee in five days, and so I'd probably worked through the withdrawal symptoms while I was down with the virus. I gained a ton of weight (not literally, but close) when I quit coffee—pretty much all the weight I didn't gain when I quit smoking—and today I'm starting to work on that. I will not pepper you with daily Slog posts about my weight, though. You're welcome.
2
I was exactly that type of smoker as well, and totally agree (I haven't read that book, however.) Haven't touched a cigarette in 5 years, thanks to a brutal lung infection that got me over the hump and made me swear never again.
To be honest, quitting caffeine (4 months caffeine free) is proving to be much, much harder. I'm not tempted by a physical craving any more, but my standard of living has gone way down. I starting to rethink my decision, predisposition to heart palpitations and panic attacks be damned. THIS ISN'T LIVING.
Side note: When people offer me coffee and I mention I quit, they then offer me tea. This is very nice of them, but it's weird. I thought it'd be implicit I'm avoiding caffeine, no? Also, tea is for sick people, old ladies, bathtub lounging, and times I want to enjoy something with a teddy bear wearing pajamas on the box. It's not a substitute for delicious coffee.
To be honest, quitting caffeine (4 months caffeine free) is proving to be much, much harder. I'm not tempted by a physical craving any more, but my standard of living has gone way down. I starting to rethink my decision, predisposition to heart palpitations and panic attacks be damned. THIS ISN'T LIVING.
Side note: When people offer me coffee and I mention I quit, they then offer me tea. This is very nice of them, but it's weird. I thought it'd be implicit I'm avoiding caffeine, no? Also, tea is for sick people, old ladies, bathtub lounging, and times I want to enjoy something with a teddy bear wearing pajamas on the box. It's not a substitute for delicious coffee.
3
Well there is one sure fire way to do it. When you feel like having a cigarette you have as shot of whiskey or vodka instead.
One thing about smokers is that I understand that they get an animal brain neuron-reaction when they do it but I consider it just damn rude to do it in my presence in public. You also get a pleasurable brain neuron reaction from masturbating but society generally consider it rude when you do it in public in front of people.
One thing about smokers is that I understand that they get an animal brain neuron-reaction when they do it but I consider it just damn rude to do it in my presence in public. You also get a pleasurable brain neuron reaction from masturbating but society generally consider it rude when you do it in public in front of people.
4
It's a lot easier to quit if you started later than life.
But most smokers started in their pre-teens (8-14) so by that point it's pretty much rewired your neural pathways.
Good advice, Paul.
But most smokers started in their pre-teens (8-14) so by that point it's pretty much rewired your neural pathways.
Good advice, Paul.
5
@2: many teas are caffine free (herbal tea). But I do agree that nothing is better than coffee. NOTHING.
And coffee has lots of good things going for it, if you can do it in moderation. I won't quit drinking it, unless I get preggers.
And coffee has lots of good things going for it, if you can do it in moderation. I won't quit drinking it, unless I get preggers.
6
I've had a horrible cold for the last few days and have had no taste for coffee at all. I drink LOTS of coffee-- not quite 12 cups a day, but enough to make me a jittery motherfucker. I've been thinking about staying off the black sauce for good, although I can't figure out why. It just sounds like a good idea despite what my dwindling productivity levels have to say about it.
Cigarettes, Jesus! I smoked through high school and most of college, but haven't had one in about 8 years except a brief puff at The Showbox after too much Hennessy a few years ago. I will never smoke a cigarette again after seeing my wife's uncle die from lung cancer. It was one of the most harrowing experiences of my life to see someone be whittled away so slowly. The black lung in health class never made me put down my Newports, but his death made it certain that I'll never pick one up again.
Cigarettes, Jesus! I smoked through high school and most of college, but haven't had one in about 8 years except a brief puff at The Showbox after too much Hennessy a few years ago. I will never smoke a cigarette again after seeing my wife's uncle die from lung cancer. It was one of the most harrowing experiences of my life to see someone be whittled away so slowly. The black lung in health class never made me put down my Newports, but his death made it certain that I'll never pick one up again.
7
Well, congrats.
The thing that bugs me about vices is that it's like, you quit smoking and/or drinking and whatever and then you're hit with an extra 100 lbs. as a reward. That sucks.
The thing that bugs me about vices is that it's like, you quit smoking and/or drinking and whatever and then you're hit with an extra 100 lbs. as a reward. That sucks.
8
I was mostly influenced by Lara (she has no sense of smell, but can taste the smoke in the air). Not because she nagged me (which she never did), but more because I felt guilty smoking around her, and it was causing me to get short of breath when we were humping.
9
I read that book and failed after a couple of days. I still have it and I'm going to reread it - thanks Paul!
@3, I think it's almost impossible for some people to empathize with seriously addicted smokers. Even when smoking was dirt cheap and considered very healthy (remember that "doctors recommend camels" ad?), about half of people still didn't smoke. It seems like about 50% of people physically can't be smokers even if they try, 30-40% of people can get addicted if they get hooked, and about 10-20% of people are SERIOUSLY very addicted - these are the people who have to smoke FIRST THING when they wake up, or else they literally can't function. That's not the case with any masturbators I know.
It is really annoying when people start smoking at bus stops or in lines, though. Walk a few steps away, jeez.
@3, I think it's almost impossible for some people to empathize with seriously addicted smokers. Even when smoking was dirt cheap and considered very healthy (remember that "doctors recommend camels" ad?), about half of people still didn't smoke. It seems like about 50% of people physically can't be smokers even if they try, 30-40% of people can get addicted if they get hooked, and about 10-20% of people are SERIOUSLY very addicted - these are the people who have to smoke FIRST THING when they wake up, or else they literally can't function. That's not the case with any masturbators I know.
It is really annoying when people start smoking at bus stops or in lines, though. Walk a few steps away, jeez.
10
i've never known anyone who drank that much coffee. omg. paul, does the world just go by in slow mo now?
11
Yay for you and congratulations! Keep up the good work and you ROCK for wiling to be 'naggy' and post this once a year to inspire others. yay! :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
12
thanks for this & previous posts on the subject. I'm a big fan of this book, as it helped myself & two buddies kick the nasty habit. have only had one or two minor cig smokin' relapses in two years, as compared to 1/2 pack a day for 15+ years. still big fan of the green bud though. Rick Steves for mayor!
14
I just ordered this thingy in the mail: http://smokingeverywhere.com/
I've heard great results from it. We'll see.
I've heard great results from it. We'll see.
15
@2: I wouldn't consider it implicit. I come across a lot of people in my job who've switched from coffee to tea. People could be quitting coffee for a number of reasons, or could even be just trying to drink less caffeine without quitting it entirely. The amount of caffeine in a cup of coffee is substantially more than in a cup of tea- twice as much, if not more in some cases..
Also, tea is awesome. I'm just saying.
Also, tea is awesome. I'm just saying.
16
I smoked for 15 years, borrowed Paul's book, and have been smoke free for 3 years. The book works. I think I was hypnotized. I don't know, I don't care. All I know is I don't smoke anymore and I'm so fucking happy!
17
while it has some daunting side effects, chantix is what worked for me after attempting to quit many, many times.
i'll still have a smoke here and there if i've been drinking but by no means would i call myself a smoker anymore.
i'll still have a smoke here and there if i've been drinking but by no means would i call myself a smoker anymore.
18
congrats! I'm proof too. 19 years of pack + a day, and I celebrated one year last November.
I don't crave, in fact I find it totally fucking gross. I PRAY for the day MO goes non (IL did last year, so the casino & strip clubs are all non at least).
@ 9: KEEP TRYING! Like VP Biden says, "geeeet up!" I tried and failed (usually on the same day I vow never again) oh about 10 times. No bullshit.
Finally, one thing that totally helps: good weed.
I don't crave, in fact I find it totally fucking gross. I PRAY for the day MO goes non (IL did last year, so the casino & strip clubs are all non at least).
@ 9: KEEP TRYING! Like VP Biden says, "geeeet up!" I tried and failed (usually on the same day I vow never again) oh about 10 times. No bullshit.
Finally, one thing that totally helps: good weed.
19
@14, "it... uses state of the art classy micro-electronic technology"
Looks like you're in for a smoke free and classy future!
Looks like you're in for a smoke free and classy future!
20
Now I want a cigarette.
Seriously, I've been tobacco free (almost entirely) for six years. The only thing I miss are the CIGARETTES. I really liked smoking. A pouch of drum every two days, sometimes faster if I was out. I'm shy, cigarettes gave me something to do with my hands, a way to talk to other people (provided they smoked), a way to get out of conversations I didn't like, plus they satisfied the intense cravings.
But it costs too much, I had a baby in the house, it made me smell like and ashtray, I coughed up strange brown stuff in the shower everymorning...
Seriously, I've been tobacco free (almost entirely) for six years. The only thing I miss are the CIGARETTES. I really liked smoking. A pouch of drum every two days, sometimes faster if I was out. I'm shy, cigarettes gave me something to do with my hands, a way to talk to other people (provided they smoked), a way to get out of conversations I didn't like, plus they satisfied the intense cravings.
But it costs too much, I had a baby in the house, it made me smell like and ashtray, I coughed up strange brown stuff in the shower everymorning...
21
i smoked from ages 14-28 (a pack a day for 11 of those years) and quit 2 years ago with the help of this book. it also helped a couple of my friends quit. great book!
24
quitting smoking for me was only finally possible when i quit drinking. i could not smoke for months but if i had a drink i'd want a pack. i quit cold turkey - it was fine.
i also had to quit caffeine for medical reasons and i hate it. i miss the comfort of coffee sooooooooo much. i no longer live in seattle, so it's easier than it would be if i still lived there and everyone once in awhile i go to starbucks and have a decaf latte and pretend what i'm drinking is coffee.
i also had to quit caffeine for medical reasons and i hate it. i miss the comfort of coffee sooooooooo much. i no longer live in seattle, so it's easier than it would be if i still lived there and everyone once in awhile i go to starbucks and have a decaf latte and pretend what i'm drinking is coffee.
25
My dad finally quit smoking by clearing the lot for our new house by himself. Unfortunately, that was when he developed an allergy to yellowjackets.
26
@23 That's the thing--you have to read the book. It hypnotizes you. He even says at the end, if you still feel like smoking after you read this book, read it again. I could tell you what it's about, but it wouldn't work. Seriously, if you want to quit, read it. I know I sound like a fucking wacko, but it's true!
27
Yeah, yeah, yeah--but let's get back to these anti-smoking pills that make you feel all speedy: names? Sources?
28
Yay for you! I quit smoking 8 years ago, and it was the best thing I ever did (I smoked for 10 years).
Just this week, my step mom was diagnosed with lung cancer that has spread to her brain. She was a smoker, but had quit a number of years ago.
So, I suspect I'm not completely off the hook.
Just this week, my step mom was diagnosed with lung cancer that has spread to her brain. She was a smoker, but had quit a number of years ago.
So, I suspect I'm not completely off the hook.
29
I also smoked a pack a day for 12 years or so, it'll be 10 years in July since I've had one. Yay!
I haven't read this book, but I agree with "when you're really ready, you'll know." That's the main thing. You don't quit because you should, you quit because you want to, and not before.
One of my tricks was immediately defining myself as a non-smoker. Friends were always saying they were "trying to quit." I never said that. There is no try: only do, or do not. Thanks, Yoda!
And, I wrote a little web app that kept track of how long it had been. Once it got to a day, I went for 2. 1 week, let's go for 2. Watching it advance made me loathe to have to sheepishly reset it, and I never have. It's still going (3461 days, 18 hours, 42 minutes), and I'll be damned if I'm going to fuck it up now.
I haven't read this book, but I agree with "when you're really ready, you'll know." That's the main thing. You don't quit because you should, you quit because you want to, and not before.
One of my tricks was immediately defining myself as a non-smoker. Friends were always saying they were "trying to quit." I never said that. There is no try: only do, or do not. Thanks, Yoda!
And, I wrote a little web app that kept track of how long it had been. Once it got to a day, I went for 2. 1 week, let's go for 2. Watching it advance made me loathe to have to sheepishly reset it, and I never have. It's still going (3461 days, 18 hours, 42 minutes), and I'll be damned if I'm going to fuck it up now.
30
@23 But isn't that kinda Paul's job- book shilling? If he likes a book he wants you to buy it so the author and publisher can make money so more books can be written.
:-)
:-)
31
@15 - some of the people who drink tea are like me. We don't want to be too wired from just coffee so we switch to tea part way through the day.
That said, anything can be addictive.
That said, anything can be addictive.
32
Yeah, @23: The book is what it is; you have to read the whole thing from beginning to end, like Caroline said.. I feel like a religious zealot or something, but believe me: If there was a one-sentence answer to nicotine addiction, I would totally put it up on Slog.
That's an awesome webthingie, Anthony.
That's an awesome webthingie, Anthony.
33
The only thing that kept me quit was when I set a date-- my quit date was the day before cigarette prices went up in July 2005. And every time I had a cigarette in the three months leading up to it, I thought about that date. I had my last one at 11pm that day and haven't looked back. It helped that my boss decided to "help" by not giving me smoke breaks for the two months preceding my quit date.
34
It's totally true that all the nagging, goading, and subtle hints, an clouts over the head in the world won't convince a smoker who isn't read to to stop. My mom had bypass surgery. Eight bypasses, do be precise, all because she was a smoker (no history of heart disease, no other possible causes). Her doctors told her point blank she would die if she didn't quit smoking. The told her that for years before the surgery, and they told her after. After the surgery, when she was in a nursing home on oxygen because she was too weak for me to take care of her at home, she was still smoking. And she died within a few months.
For those of you who are ready, I wish you nothing but the best.
For those of you who are ready, I wish you nothing but the best.
35
The book works. Couple of things you should know:
1. Don't try and quit before you read the book. You can smoke while reading. I did.
2. It is one of the most annoying, self-promoting books ever written at the beginning. Don't let that stop you.
The friend who gave it to me promised to stop bugging me about smoking if I read a chapter every week. Easy deal.
I smoked for 20+ years more 2 packs/day. Haven't smoked in a couple of years. I don't keep count.
p.s.
Smoking is still my secret great love. We will just have to be apart because she is one bad relationship.
1. Don't try and quit before you read the book. You can smoke while reading. I did.
2. It is one of the most annoying, self-promoting books ever written at the beginning. Don't let that stop you.
The friend who gave it to me promised to stop bugging me about smoking if I read a chapter every week. Easy deal.
I smoked for 20+ years more 2 packs/day. Haven't smoked in a couple of years. I don't keep count.
p.s.
Smoking is still my secret great love. We will just have to be apart because she is one bad relationship.
38
I smoked 2 packs a day for 15+ years and quit not quite a year ago. I can never ever smoke again. Sometimes I miss it like a dead lover, but usually I don't.
I really really like having money. It's nice. I also like beer again (hated it while I was a smoker, go figure that one out).
I used chantix, and it made me suicidal. Another reason I will never smoke again - quitting? NOT WORTH IT. It all around sucked, and now I'm getting fat. Fuck that.
I'll never give up coffee. A girl has to have SOMETHING to look forward to in the morning.
I really really like having money. It's nice. I also like beer again (hated it while I was a smoker, go figure that one out).
I used chantix, and it made me suicidal. Another reason I will never smoke again - quitting? NOT WORTH IT. It all around sucked, and now I'm getting fat. Fuck that.
I'll never give up coffee. A girl has to have SOMETHING to look forward to in the morning.
39
@38: I've had friends who've gotten really depressed from Chantix, too. I don't recommend it.
Jessica @33: I used a finish date, too, and it worked. That's in the book. And @ 35: thanks for pointing out that it's a really annoying beginning to the book. I remember starting reading the book and wanting to murder the guy because he was so full of himself. The book gets better as you read through it.
Jessica @33: I used a finish date, too, and it worked. That's in the book. And @ 35: thanks for pointing out that it's a really annoying beginning to the book. I remember starting reading the book and wanting to murder the guy because he was so full of himself. The book gets better as you read through it.
40
The electronic cigarette is totally working for me. I really LIKE certain things about smoking - the zen like ritual of the inhale and exhale, the way the smoke looks, the nictotine rush. I get all three of those things with the electronic cigarette, but none of the things I HATED about smoking - the smell of cigarette butts and ashtrays; the dirtyness of the ashes; burning holes in my clothes; my stinky breath, hair, face, and hands; the poisons and tar that were destroying my lungs; being socially outcast around non-smokers. I feel like I can have my cake and eat it too with this new way to smoke.
41
I appreciate Jerimiah's comment about e cigarette kits. I don't smoke, myself, but I really appreciate it when people I work with smoke electronic cigarettes rather than the traditional ones. This way, I don't have to breathe it in all day.
Advertisement
Most Commented on Slog
-
SL Letter of the Day: Pill The Homos! by Dan Savage
-
The AP Is Reporting That Whitney Houston Is Dead by Paul Constant
-
Slog Bible Study: Deuteronomy 21:10-14 by Goldy
-
Because Guns Make Us Safer by Goldy
-
SL Letter of the Day: Daddy Loves Who? by Dan Savage
-
Gregoire: "This is signed!" by Eli Sanders
-
Gay Kids Are Still Killing Themselves by Dan Savage
-
Whitney Is Dead, And So Is Hollywood by Kelly O
-
Planned Parenthood Exposed! by David Schmader
-
Stranger Tournament of Dunces, Match 3: Rep. Mark Hargrove vs. Rep. Norma Smith by Eli Sanders
RSS
Facebook
Twitter
Comments (41) RSS