I'm at Moe—"the only bar on Capitol Hill with a Scottish bartender tonight"—so I can guarantee they're open, and it looked like the Comet and Cha-Cha were open when we walked by. Word around the bar is that Linda's is open too. Know of other bars open tonight for your post-Christmas drinking needs? Put 'em in the comments.
My Christmas? I can't find a way to stop listening to "A Horse with No Name." The tune has me under a spell. La, laa, lalaaa.
Or just bored? Let me suggest my aunt Astri's Potato Chip Cookies:
3/4 cup butter
3/4 cup sugar
1 egg yolk
3/4 cup finely crushed potato chips
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup chopped pecans (or cashews or walnuts)Cream the butter and sugar, then add the egg yolk and vanilla.
Mix in flour, potato chips, and nuts.
Roll into small "walnut-sized" balls, then roll in granulated sugar. Flatten each ball with the bottom of a glass.Bake 12 mins at 350 (or 9 mins on a non-stick sheet).
Happy holiday times!

Are you bored on this Christmas day? Here is an internet group for you to join: Pictures of Towels:
This group is for pictures of towels and writing about towels. All types of towels are welcome: bath towels, hand towels, dish towels and tea towels....I also would like to see more pictures of towels. Please post them here.
ALL NON-TOWEL RELATED CONTENT WILL BE REMOVED, eventually.
Merry Christmas, o bored non-believers!
(Via Weird Universe.)
...from Last Days' Hot Tipper Pam:
After waiting for 2 hours at 3rd and Pine in the cold falling snow yesterday morning, the 358 going north to Aurora and Shoreline finally showed up. As we headed up Aurora, the bus got stuck in front of Woodland Park, due to a large tree that fell across the road.
It was a fun experience. The bus was packed with at least 20 people standing up, and while we were stuck in front of the felled tree, a fight broke out in the back of the bus.The fight started when a woman decided she was sick and needed to get off the bus. The bus driver would not open the back door to let anyone off, as the bus was stuck in the middle of Aurora, so the woman had a man help her open the emergency window and jump out. But another passenger thought that the guy helping the woman was trying to push her out the window, harming her, and a fight between the two men ensued. The other bus riders in the back helped get things under control. But about a minute after that another guy opened the emergency window and jumped out. He fell on his head but got up and walked across the street. All in all the bus was stuck for about a half an hour. In the end my morning commute took 3 hours and I only live at 90th and Aurora.
Merry Christmas.
Hardrock, Coco, and Joe...
Courtesy of Slog tipper Ed. Via RogersBasement.
Harold Pinter 1930-2008
and Eartha Kitt 1927-2008
I will never understand Santa hat porn, or the sexy Santa hat.

Where did the Santa hat even come from? Someone on WikiAnswers asked and got this response:
your moms a- hole
Good one!
But, really: Where did it come from? Wikipedia isn't helping. Here is a detail from the earliest known drawing of Santa Claus by American Santa-Claus-drawing-popularizer Thomas Nast:
That looks more like your standard ski hat, I guess. But then it got stretched out, nightcap-style, into the floppy, fuzzy thing we see today. And it is not at all sexy. Sexy people can wear it:

All that hay looks awfully scratchy, though.
And I suppose there's the whole lap-sitting and wish-granting angle, plus there's the weird accent on the words "naughty" and "nice" that are maybe supposed to be sexy but always seem sort of creepy to me. But listen, porn people: you've got a giant, fuzzy floppy hat with a pom-pom on top of your head. Not. Sexy. Now be good little hotties and go put on a pair of bunny ears.
I hope you saw fit to bring Paul Constant the Urinal Forehead Rest he requested via Slog yesterday.
He works very hard and deserves a nice gift, plus I'm really tired of walking into the Stranger men's room and finding this.
Thank you,
David Schmader
Two images that, for me, defined the last week—now in diptych form.

Left, from Dan Savage. Right, from StrangrFlickr contributor Josh C. Diptyching courtesy of my brother.
Courtesy of Slog tipper Jubilation T. Cornball, who writes: "What could be better than a bunch of whores singing a poignant Christmas song? Hooray, Dolly! Hooray, whores!"
But here's what I want to know: what's so damn sucky about hard candy that you can modify Christmas with it and ruin Christmas for everyone? Or is hard candy like kryptonite for hookers?

As is tradition—TRADITION!—certain gay Jews, and certain non-Jews without Christmas Eve obligations, arrived at Shanghai Garden last night around 7 p.m.
Every Christmas Eve at this restaurant is Jewy. But, relative to previous years, last night was outrageously Jewy. One rather bold table brought its own menorah, lit the candles (it was night number four of Hanukkah after all), and sang a prayer. Jokes were made about how many minyans were present—at least enough, it was thought, for a bris, a bar mitzvah, and the blessing of a new shul (with a cantonese cantor). In among the Jews and Buddhists: two writers for the Seattle P-I, King County Councilman Dow Constantine, and those same fish that have been swimming in Shanghai Garden's giant aquarium for all eternity. On our table: salt-and-pepper squid, shrimp with black bean sauce, high nutrition hand-shaved barley green noodles, Szechuan beef in garlic sauce, dried green beans, and eggplant in garlic sauce.
Sound delicious? It's not too late to get on the Chinese-food-on-Christmas bandwagon. Last year, Angela Garbes offered a list of places that tend to be open and serving Peking Duck over the holiday.
Photo by Ruby Re-Usable in the Strangr Flickr pool.
Film
This is among the holiest of holidays in the Western tradition. What better day to get thee to a movie theater and worship at the altar of Meryl Streep? She is something on the order of a god, and fittingly in this one she plays a nun—a lying, vengeful, witchy nun. Doubt has everything you want it to have: a satisfying visual texture, a cold energy, a prurient central mystery, I-fucking-hate-you dialogue, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and very few characters (i.e., lots of Streep). (See movie times, www.thestranger.com, for details.)
CHRISTOPHER FRIZZELLE
There are no readings tonight.
Oh, hell with it; you should read A Christmas Carol. It's not Dickens' best, but it's still great, and a fun little ghost story, to boot.
The full readings calendar, including the next week or so, is here.
This image of Santa and Mrs. Claus in a state of ecstasy, replete with Santa's downy thighs and both of their spindly Cranach legs, was sent to every member of the Stranger's staff as a Christmas gift. We each received a poster of it that is about three feet tall.

The artist who made this drawing is named Jesse Higman. Find him and more of his art here.
The amazing thing about this work of art is that the artist spent eight years on it. The entire Bush administration.
Here is the incredibly sweet note he sent with this work of art, which, in its original form, is five feet tall. We here at The Stranger have to admit that we did not know we wanted this gift, but now that we have it, we are moved.
Thank you for your work at the Stranger. I read it as I eat, marking pages. I like to cut out ads, art and headlines for my bulletin board. I am proud that you are in my neighborhood, on my favorite street in town collaged with posters, stickers, stencils and paint brilliantly dribbled on the sidewalk.I made this Christmas print to give to friends and the people I meet each year who I hope will appreciate it. Please accept it as a gift from the painted streets for the work you do to make our culture so rich.
I had a vision of this ideal couple up there on their own. It seems possible, to give, to have love and be proud, naked and getting old. It's one of those moments when you know what's important and nothing else matters. It felt like a dance to me, with grace. I mean it with all the commitment I can muster.
I drew this over eight years with a technical pen. The original is five feet tall. I drew it in the negative with black ink on white paper, then reversed it on a color copier and glued the pieces together again. Obviously, a computer has become the way to go for assembly but I would still draw it with a pen. The scribbles on the sides were to get the ink flowing in my pen. In the end they seemed like snow to me, so I kept them.
I hope you have happy holidays and a loving, productive year.
Jesse
Rain and Snow: It’s comin’ down.
The Ghost of Christmas Present: The week of free parking will end Friday.
Part of the Problem: Pope calls for peace in the Middle East, describing it as "the land in which Jesus lived, and which he loved so deeply."
Also Part of the Problem: Israel warns Palestinians that they will pay “heavy price" for their role in recent Middle East tumult.
Conservative Compassion: Bush withdraws pardon after learning inmate's father gave big bucks to GOP.
Reuse Till It Hurts: Electronics recycling begins next year.
Senate Clause: Franken wins case to block recount of 150 potentially double-counted ballots. Franken is, as of today, up by 48 votes.
Republican Staffers on the Hill: Plan to celebrate Obama’s inauguration.
Extra Trash in Plastic Bags: Pick-up resumes soon, they say. Nickels excuses the city’s ill preparedness for the snow.
They Must Be High: Maritime industry lobbies Gregoire to replace viaduct with another elevated structure.
Courtesy of Slog tipper Dave U.