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News & ArtsTuesday, December 16, 2008
Film / Sex Well, I'm Fucked.
Posted by Lindy West on Tue, Dec 16, 2008 at 1:55 PM
But not literally, apparently! BBC News reports that "Watching romantic comedies can spoil your love life":
Rom-coms have been blamed by relationship experts at Heriot Watt University for promoting unrealistic expectations when it comes to love.They found fans of films such as Runaway Bride and Notting Hill often fail to communicate with their partner.
The university's Dr Bjarne Holmes said: "Marriage counsellors often see couples who believe that sex should always be perfect, and if someone is meant to be with you then they will know what you want without you needing to communicate it.
"We now have some emerging evidence that suggests popular media play a role in perpetuating these ideas in people's minds.
"The problem is that while most of us know that the idea of a perfect relationship is unrealistic, some of us are still more influenced by media portrayals than we realise."
If you need me, I'll be over here crying and waiting for Hugh Grant. FOREVER.
1
Did the experts take into account the fact that people who watch those movies on a regular basis are just dumber?
2
UGH!!! Hugh Grant?!? Are you fucking kidding me? Colin Firth, now that piece of British meat I can sink my teath into, well him and Prince Harry.
4
The only realistic romantic story ever told is The Unbearable Lightness of Being. Idealize the happiness of that couple, complete with adultery and crushed hopes, and you too can be happy.
5
Lindy, you make me happy. I have a box of trashy romance novels with your name on it if you want something to help you pass the time while you wait for Hugh...
6
It's all correlation though... maybe the people who just naturally see relationships over-idealistically are more drawn to those movies?
8
True hilarity ensues when the women who maintain a steady diet of romantic comedies encounter the men who maintain a steady diet of porn.
9
I dunno. I watched "Love, Actually" and proposed to my Portuguese maid after asking her father for her hand in marriage. That went well. Totally.
10
It seems like a bad idea to enter into a marital agreement with a bride who insists on wearing running shoes to the ceremony.
11
I had a vaguely similar thought after seeing Slumdog Millionaire. Great movie. But the female character (and their potential future relationship) was 100% idealized. I know, I know, it's a "modern fairy tale" or whatever but still...
It seems like "getting the girl" and "getting the guy" is the object of the main character of any rom-com (and Slumdog Mill.). Because that’s the interesting part of any story. But, it just sort of assumes that everything works out once they get together. “It is written”, so it will be a great relationship (no need to communicate, etc.)…
It seems like "getting the girl" and "getting the guy" is the object of the main character of any rom-com (and Slumdog Mill.). Because that’s the interesting part of any story. But, it just sort of assumes that everything works out once they get together. “It is written”, so it will be a great relationship (no need to communicate, etc.)…
14
You mean some people are just starting to figure this out?
Say what you will about stupid people. We set up our own expectations for our own relationships based on what we see, even when we know it isn't real or realistic.
Our culture is pretty dysfunctional about sex and relationships. I think it's reflected by movies like this being made, and cycled by unhappy people being drawn to see more of this type of crap.
Say what you will about stupid people. We set up our own expectations for our own relationships based on what we see, even when we know it isn't real or realistic.
Our culture is pretty dysfunctional about sex and relationships. I think it's reflected by movies like this being made, and cycled by unhappy people being drawn to see more of this type of crap.
15
True hilarity ensues when the women who maintain a steady diet of romantic comedies encounter the men who maintain a steady diet of porn.
Sounds like a new Judd Apatow movie or Kevin Smith.
Sounds like a new Judd Apatow movie or Kevin Smith.
16
I haven't read the thing, but I'm wondering just how measurable romantic success is?
My well-researched and totally scientific opinion is that romantic comedies are okay as long as they're balanced out with a healthy portion of Japanese tentacle porn anime.
My well-researched and totally scientific opinion is that romantic comedies are okay as long as they're balanced out with a healthy portion of Japanese tentacle porn anime.
19
@1 - actually, dumb people do better at romance than smart people.
Part is they don't see all the flaws, part is they don't care. And the other part is they don't have high expectations, just someone who doesn't beat them or sell their car while they're at work.
Part is they don't see all the flaws, part is they don't care. And the other part is they don't have high expectations, just someone who doesn't beat them or sell their car while they're at work.
20
I dunno about rom coms, but the movies that really shaped, and subsequently messed with my love life were Pump up the Volume and The Breakfast Club. Trying to find a Judd Nelson/Christian Slater fusion in high school was nigh on impossible.
21
Maybe this is just my overwhelming hate for 27 Dresses talking, but I could kinda see it.
My most recent girlfriend seems to have a slight problem with this (not to a debilitating degree or anything, but she's got a bit of waiting for Colin Firth).
My most recent girlfriend seems to have a slight problem with this (not to a debilitating degree or anything, but she's got a bit of waiting for Colin Firth).
22
The dishes better be done or there's DEFINITELY no booty action tonight.
Did romantic comedies (subconsciously) teach me that?
Did romantic comedies (subconsciously) teach me that?
24
This is the part that had me scratching my head:
As part of the project, 100 student volunteers were asked to watch the 2001 romantic comedy Serendipity, while a further 100 watched a David Lynch drama.
Students watching the romantic film were later found to be more likely to believe in fate and destiny.
...because David Lynch ALWAYS fills me with warm, fuzzy feelings about my future.
As part of the project, 100 student volunteers were asked to watch the 2001 romantic comedy Serendipity, while a further 100 watched a David Lynch drama.
Students watching the romantic film were later found to be more likely to believe in fate and destiny.
...because David Lynch ALWAYS fills me with warm, fuzzy feelings about my future.
25
Correlation is not causation. However, those who believe in happily ever after without working at it have their heads up their asses.
26
I always watch romantic comedies as if they were horror movies and horror movies as if they were romantic comedies. Much more fun that way.
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