Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« Austin Cantina to (Maybe) Close Dow… | Lips Review (Xbox 360) »

Friday, December 12, 2008

Film "If It's Not Alternative It Must Be Boring."

Posted by Lindy West on Fri, Dec 12, 2008 at 2:37 PM

I know this is completely dumb to even bring up, because nobody saw this movie except me and five sailing enthusiasts who now hate me, and it came out like two months ago, but whatever. My Morning Light review just got another comment from a disgruntled sailor and I will now respond. Because what else am I doing. PERIOD.

Typical review from the Stranger. If it's not alternative it must be boring.

Yes. This is obviously true. Typical Lindy West inner monologue: Let's see. Was this movie...alternative? FUCK YEAH! That was the alternativest movie I have ever seen. Oh man, I was so not bored by all the alternatives that that movie offered me.

This movie may not have a broad audience , but I don't think that Roy Disney would spend millions of dollars that he knew he would not get back purely in vain.

I do not understand your words.

BTW. I dont recall ever sailing in southern cali on a day that I didnt see dolphins.

Cool story.

I think that you wish it was staged.

Yes. It is my fondest wish. (!?)

You should go sailing, you may see why Roy Disney wanted to share the experience on the big screen.

Listen. Just because a movie happens to be about your most favorite thing in the world does not mean that it is good. Morning Light is not good, and it is not a documentary. It's a bunch of sexist fucks on a boat reciting scripted inspirational speeches written for them by an old man whose frozen ~~dad~~ uncle invented a famous mouse or whatever. It is SO STUPID. God. So stupid. And totally not alternative enough. Bye.

Comments (13) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

I really really loved it. I looked past the cookie-cutter aspect of the kids, and I laughed, cried, and was white-knuckled. I'm not a sailor, but I would recommend this movie to anyone. Seriously. And I was a film student.

Posted by atreu on December 12, 2008 at 2:43 PM

lindy, honey, roy disney is not walt's son. he is his nephew. just wanted to set the facts straight. what else are you doing? why not play with your telepathic cards? or did i give you predict the fruit?

Posted by scary tyler moore on December 12, 2008 at 2:45 PM

"BTW. I dont recall ever sailing in southern cali on a day that I didnt see dolphins."

"Cali"? Ugh... and wtf, there's DOLPHINS down there? I wasn't even aware of that, maybe it's because I don't have a sail boat, or a seasons pass to Seaworld (he didn't say WHERE he saw the dolphins - yuck yuck yuck yuck). Also, are you SURE those were dolphins? Grab that fresh beef cut you're saving for the BBQ and hold it near them, just to see? Dolphins LOVE raw, bloody steak, everyone know that. Also, fuck you.

This movie sounds insufferable, like Endless Summer, re-tooled for the Wall Street adventurer.

Posted by Dougsf on December 12, 2008 at 2:53 PM

@2: Oh, whatever. But thanks. (Predict the fruit!)

Posted by Lindy West on December 12, 2008 at 2:54 PM

Lindy, god bless ya. *wipes a tear of laughter from her eye* The person who wins the shoe shopping trip with you on Strangercrombie is in for a treat! *is jealous, but poor*

Posted by Tracy on December 12, 2008 at 3:03 PM

unless it stars a be-gilled, misogynistic kevin costner, i don't want your lousy boat movie.

Posted by brandon on December 12, 2008 at 3:23 PM

"Casablanca" wasn't "alternative" in any way whatsoever, and it will ALWAYS be brilliant. And this is coming from one of the snarkiest, most misanthropic, most "alternative" people you'd ever meet. But I guess to some, I could never be "alternative" until I get my earlobes hideously stretched by some stupid "plugs." You're right, Lindy, that WAS a stupid comment. A bad movie is a bad movie.

Posted by Chris down in The Couv on December 12, 2008 at 3:41 PM

They totally should have been reciting Proust at the ocean. Then it would have been "alt" enough for us "cali" types

Posted by andoodoo on December 12, 2008 at 4:05 PM

I am starting to like Lindy West.

Posted by this guy i know on December 12, 2008 at 4:28 PM

Lindy, I've been having a really bad month, but whenever I log onto my laptop and check out Slog, you usually make me laugh. Thanks.

Posted by Leslie N. on December 12, 2008 at 7:29 PM

I had the paperwork all done to change my fucking son's fucking name to Rod Motherfucking Blagojevich but fuck it, I just got done changing it to Lindy West and I'm going to fucking leave it right the fuck where it is.

He's in that fucking Gentlemen of this Slog Calendar, by the way. What the fuck would I do if out of the fucking blue his name changed to Rod? Hope you spent $50 to see a picture of little Lindy.

Posted by elenchos on December 12, 2008 at 7:54 PM

Walt Disney did not even invent the mouse. Walt Disney Stole the mouse. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ub_Iwerks#C…

Posted by Superfrankenstein on December 13, 2008 at 12:09 AM