Thursday, December 4, 2008
2008 A Goddamn Vampire Stole My Girl
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Dec 4, 2008 at 6:53 PM
One of the really annoying byproducts of this whole bullshitty Twilight/True Blood thing is perfectly nice guys getting dumped after vampires steal their girls. It ain't right, and I'M TIRED OF THAT WHICH AIN'T RIGHT! To help put my impotent rage into context, here is a very funny short film by a couple of writers from The Colbert Report appropriately titled "Once You Go Bat."
1
But vampires are hot! I mean, I love w7ngman and all, but if there were a vampire on the scene, I'd have some serious soul-searching to do.
2
There is no comparison between True Blood and Twilight. Twilight is an awful story about two teen prudes. True Blood is fucking HOT.
3
It's an age thing -- you can't beat an 800 year old guy...
Myth about 'dirty old men' supported by science
http://www.physorg.com/news147615590.htm…
"Younger women...prefer older men: fully 14 of 16 women aged 20-39 were looking for an older partner. Among women over 60, however, the majority were looking for a younger man. "
It's an age thing -- you can't beat an 800 year old guy...
Myth about 'dirty old men' supported by science
http://www.physorg.com/news147615590.htm…
"Younger women...prefer older men: fully 14 of 16 women aged 20-39 were looking for an older partner. Among women over 60, however, the majority were looking for a younger man. "
4
Thanks for that scientific insight @3. Now apparently all I need is a $500K house, a body like Beckham, and another $40K - $50K in annual salary and teh ladies will be throwing themselves at my feet.
And that's different, how?
And that's different, how?
5
I love the twist ending.
6
Oh, Wm. Steven H. (tm) what a sad tired fucking old bore you are and how useless, especially since Lindy west appropriated at least 50 % of your style, who needs you anymore? HOWEVER! HOWEVER! HOWEVER! DIAPER GRAVY! Yawn.
7
How dare you lump True Blood in with Twilight!
Does twilight have Anna Paquin's boobies in it? No, it doesn't. Guess what does?
Does twilight have Anna Paquin's boobies in it? No, it doesn't. Guess what does?
8
I think this movie was made by a Mormon so why the fuck did you go see it?!
9
Chill -- vampires just read How to Talk to Girls.
11
Vampires steal their girls. It ain't right, and I'M TIRED OF THAT WHICH AIN'T RIGHT!
Wm, DAMN STRAIGHT!
To help put my impotent rage into context,
Russian Pastor Watch - RIP Aleksy II
http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/12/05/e…
Wm, DAMN STRAIGHT!
To help put my impotent rage into context,
Russian Pastor Watch - RIP Aleksy II
http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/12/05/e…
12
Oh Humpy, I'm batshit for YOU!
13
I just read Twilight and was trying to understand if I wasn't really a girl, or if most American women are just sexually dysfunctional and secretly yearn for the ideal gay male companion. But, as others have said I don't really care as long as I get to watch True Blood.
14
This is why I carry a bowie knife with me to sharpen stakes just in case.
(grin)
(grin)
15
god damn vampire worshipers all because of that fuckin twilight bull shit its an epidemic and it needs to be destroyed, vampire dick heads fuck off douches. giving us goths a bad name bastards.
FUCKIN vampire hypocrites
__┌┐______' ┌┐ Copy and paste if you think this
__││_______││ needs to be broad casted to the vampire/twilight faggots
┌┬┬┬┐___┌┬┬┬┐ if not then your consider one of them..
│____│┐_┌│____│
FUCKIN vampire hypocrites
__┌┐______' ┌┐ Copy and paste if you think this
__││_______││ needs to be broad casted to the vampire/twilight faggots
┌┬┬┬┐___┌┬┬┬┐ if not then your consider one of them..
│____│┐_┌│____│
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