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News & ArtsFriday, November 28, 2008
Life It's Christmas Time In the City
Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Nov 28, 2008 at 2:56 PM
The boyfriend wanted to go for a run; the kid wanted to go skateboarding. All I wanted to do was get out of the house. The kid's at the skatepark, the boyfriend is trotting around Greenlake, and I've been deposited at this here Starbucks for the duration. And after ten minutes I'm ready to pull a gun and order the baristas to turn off the Christmas carols—or else. The baristas, I expect, would cooperate cheerfully; they might not even call the police. I mean, if this ear-splitting Santa-Rudolph-Silver-Snowman tape loop is punishing anyone, it's punishing the poor baristas.
3
You remember those teen-excluding sonic devices that stores put in? They let off a sound wave that kids are more sensitive to, so they don't want to hang out in front of the corner shop.
Perhaps Starbucks tried to install such a device, and it's horribly malfunctioned to drive away most of humanity.
Perhaps Starbucks tried to install such a device, and it's horribly malfunctioned to drive away most of humanity.
5
Can we talk about how of all the coffee shops in the whole city, you are hanging out at Starbucks...
6
He's right, pity the baristas.
Everyone's getting homemade jam & stuff bought locally for presents this year. I'm done w/ the whole mall moozak rude people pushin', shootin' in toy stores & trampling over Wal*Mart temp workers. 'member Tickle Me Elmo? I worked next door to a Kaybee Toys the year that was hot, & I saw one woman strike another one, over the last toy. 'tis *not* the season for that.
Everyone's getting homemade jam & stuff bought locally for presents this year. I'm done w/ the whole mall moozak rude people pushin', shootin' in toy stores & trampling over Wal*Mart temp workers. 'member Tickle Me Elmo? I worked next door to a Kaybee Toys the year that was hot, & I saw one woman strike another one, over the last toy. 'tis *not* the season for that.
7
Dan! What are you doing, still using OS X 10.4 Tiger! Leopard's been out for months! Get with it, man!
8
Dan, I'm pretty sure you can find a coffee shop in Seattle that (a) doesn't play Xmas music, and (b) doesn't charge you for a wireless internet connection.
But then, what would you have to bitch about if you went to a place like that?
But then, what would you have to bitch about if you went to a place like that?
9
Meh on fluffy OS upgrades. I'm also running 10.4.11. Granted, 10.4 was also mostly a useless release (Dashboard? Spotlight? Gross). I'd still be running 10.3.x if there were timely security updates. OSX has definitely passed the point of useful upgrades and gone into bloat. I can't even be bothered to pirate that shit.
10
Greenlake Chocolati isn't too bad. Not as nice as the Wallingford Chocolati, but not as soulsuckingly bad as Starbucks.
11
Yeah Dan, Starbucks? There are several other places to hang within a short walk of where you are.
12
I used to work in retail. Be nice to baristas and sales reps at Christmas, ESPECIALLY if there is stupid christmas music playing over and over. They put those things on a 7-song repeat and you have to listen to the same songs ALL DAY. Trust me, xmas music + annoying shopper = "oh, so sorry, we are COMPLETELY out of that in your size!"
13
It's possible to switch the music, but blame corporate... They've made it much harder to change the god-awful Christmas music than it used to be. We've been listening to John Legend for two weeks straight without much interruption.
And no taking pictures inside, foo! :-)
And no taking pictures inside, foo! :-)
15
@7,9: Hey, Mac OS 8.6 on a Rev. A iMac still works if you stick with the handy Slog Mobile link.
Just sayin'.
Just sayin'.
17
I hear ya. My roommate is insisting on putting up his tacky, fake x-mas tree this weekend. THIS weekend; in fucking November! Last year he left it up till goddamned Valentines day and I'm woozy at the thought of having to deal with three months of plastic cheer in my living room.
18
Ugh. I used to work at Starbucks as a barista. I worked in one of the only stores that still had a cassette tape deck for the muzak. Whether it was allowed or not, there were maybe 4-5 tapes that were pretty good (motown, jazz, blues, rolling stones picks, etc.) and everything else was shit. I do remember a particular Lillith Fair-type cassette that "accidentally" fell victim to the mop bucket...three or four times.
Then, I worked in a store that had one of the CD systems. Those things are evil. Although I still refused to play whatever we were supposed to play (even at X-mas...unless the manager was there), the discs had DRM and would expire after a certain date and just refuse to play. So even if there was a disc that was halfway decent (doing closing duties to The Specials and King Tubby ain't so bad), the fuckers would stop working before we got something else decent and cause my little music nerd heart to explode with nerd rage.
Anyway... I get to listen to my iPod at my current job, but I feel for the working stiffs having their ears assaulted.
Then, I worked in a store that had one of the CD systems. Those things are evil. Although I still refused to play whatever we were supposed to play (even at X-mas...unless the manager was there), the discs had DRM and would expire after a certain date and just refuse to play. So even if there was a disc that was halfway decent (doing closing duties to The Specials and King Tubby ain't so bad), the fuckers would stop working before we got something else decent and cause my little music nerd heart to explode with nerd rage.
Anyway... I get to listen to my iPod at my current job, but I feel for the working stiffs having their ears assaulted.
19
Sbux corp goes positively nuts at Xmas. They were forcing those damn red tinselly cups on us in November already. Fortunately, I haven't set foot in one since my free Election Day coffee, and the mandatory Xmas merriment is most of the reason. Hey Howie: Please can the Xmas crap until Dec 1, at very fucking least. Thanks!
20
C'mon Dan! Just plug your headset into your laptop and listen to some GOOD xmas tunes, namely: "A John Waters Christmas".
I bought it for my nephew a few years ago. The Kid should be at the age now where he'd appreciate it. My favorite song is "Santa Claus is a Black Man", but there are many other good ones!
enjoy!
I bought it for my nephew a few years ago. The Kid should be at the age now where he'd appreciate it. My favorite song is "Santa Claus is a Black Man", but there are many other good ones!
enjoy!
21
People are so damn afraid of quiet that they'll put on any kind of shit music. They don't care that it's shit because they're not actually listening to it.
22
It is appropriate that a holiday celebrating the virgin birth of a fictional character should have obnoxious music that grinds the soul to ashes. Enjoy!
23
Wow. Like no one had ever fucking discovered that corporate Christmas music sucks before. Oh, but since it's Dan Savage, it's, um, an IMPORTANT observation.
24
Age has its privileges and crotchets: I carry a small Listerine bottle in my backpack filled with VSOP brandy so that when I'm at Starbucks - esp. that so hetero one you're at in Greenlake - I order a latte and surreptitiously pour in a shot of brandy - no one the wiser or confrontational. It's a good thing.
BTW - why do so many people need/demand a sound track for their lives? Whatever happened to the sound of silence? Or does silence not sell coffee or cyber-trash?
BTW - why do so many people need/demand a sound track for their lives? Whatever happened to the sound of silence? Or does silence not sell coffee or cyber-trash?
25
@10
Yeah, that's what I was going to say. ;)
Also, Tangletown has some good coffee (and Mighty-O!).
There is no excuse for Starbucks within city limits.
Yeah, that's what I was going to say. ;)
Also, Tangletown has some good coffee (and Mighty-O!).
There is no excuse for Starbucks within city limits.
26
Yeah, working at Starbucks one Christmas was torture. It ruined even the good songs on the mix (like Billie Holiday singing 'I've Got My Love to keep Me Warm').
27
Last week I was at Green Leaf cafe and they had music which was a childrens choir doing xmas songs...ugh
28
Dan, get a CD of the Seattle Men's Cjhorus singing show tunes .... 100 per cent your taste and queer and all ...
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