Friday, November 21, 2008
Film Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Posted by Lindy West on Fri, Nov 21, 2008 at 4:03 PM
Twilight opens today, to the collective squeals of goths across the land. It screened too late for our print edition, but our resident squealing goth Paul Constant wrote an excellent review, which you should read:
Look, fuck it: If you really liked the Twilight books, you’ll probably really enjoy the Twilight movie. Although your favorite line of dialogue, whatever it is, will probably not make it into the movie, and that will give you something to complain about on the message boards at www.bellaandedward.com for months to come. If you have no desire to read Twilight—or if you tried it and found the hackneyed dialogue and empty-headed plotlessness too offensive to continue—there is absolutely no reason for you to see this movie.
The excellent review also contains this extra-excellent sentence:
At first, as they snap and snark at each other, they appear mildly alarmed by their own budding puppy love, like a monkey who can’t quite stop touching an electric fence.
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2
Remember, those are MORMON vampires. Evidently the Mormons approve of relationships between humans and the undead.
3
By "goths," you mean "breathless teenage girls with deluded notions of romance, and their unhappy mothers looking for fantasy escape from their unfulfilled lives."
Most goths either don't care about Twilight, or think it's the most hilariously terrible thing to come along since the Anita Blake books.
And yes, this week's South Park explains the difference between goths and fangdorks, and brilliantly (for once).
http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes…
Most goths either don't care about Twilight, or think it's the most hilariously terrible thing to come along since the Anita Blake books.
And yes, this week's South Park explains the difference between goths and fangdorks, and brilliantly (for once).
http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes…
4
@#2 - Relations between the human and the undeads, good. Relations between two humans who love each other, not necessarily good unless they have genitalia that fit the Mormon definition of good, in which case -- good; if not? NOT good. I would say f*** the Mormons, but I'm not that kind of boy.
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