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2008 Under the Umbrella of Job Creation

Posted by Anthony Hecht on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 9:10 PM

Looking for a Sarah Palin lookalike for an adult film to be shot in next 10 days.

Major adult studio.

Please send pix, stats etc. ASAP

Pay: $2000-3000

No anal required

via gruber » remiel » babiejenks

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Homo / City The Last Dance for Neighbours?

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 6:48 PM

Neighbours, Seattle’s venerable gay dance club, filed a lawsuit last week fighting for its right to remain in a warehouse-style building in the Pike-Pine neighborhood. The bar opened there in 1983, started serving liquor a few years later, and has since made a patchwork of remodels, from go-go cages to another dance floor in the basement.

But the building’s owners, a land trust comprising several individuals, sent a letter to the bar owners in early August terminating the lease and telling the bar to vacate by the end of the month.

In the letter, landlords claim the bar violated terms of the lease signed in March of this year. It says the lease allows the tenant to use the space as a “tavern… commissary, restaurant. ... and cabaret.” But, it says, “No food, however, is prepared and served on the premises. Furthermore, the current operation of the Premises as a dance club is not a permitted use.” The letter goes on to say that the club remodeled without permission and allowed liquor to be taken outside of the bar, as examples of further lease violations.

But there is no secret that Neighbours is a dance club. Leases over previous decades used similar language, the lawsuit shows. So it seems extremely unusual that the landlords would, after signing another lease in March, suddenly act surprised that Neighbours is, in fact, a dance club. An attorney for the landlords has not returned calls to comment.

“We don’t think there is any merit whatsoever to the landlords’ claims,” says Mark Kimball, an attorney representing Neighbours. He says owners were informed about how the space was used. “We believe the business is accurately described in the lease."

Kimball would not speculate on why the bar owners were attempting to negate the lease after 25 years. He says the bar owners and the landlords are currently in negotiations. “I am extremely confident that the dispute will be resolved favorably to Neighbours,” he says.

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2008 Who the Fuck Is This "Joe Six-pack" and Why Do I Hate Him So Much Now?

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 5:49 PM

Some conservative douchebag named Hugh Hewitt got the first national radio interview with Sarah Palin today. Unsurprisingly, Palin was a hell of a lot more poised on the staunchly Republican radio show than in her Couric interviews. If you want, you can listen to the interview here or find a transcript here. Listening to the interview, I was a little more nervous about Thursday's debate—even though it's entirely possible Palin was just reading the answers off a sheet of paper in front of her, and none of the questions required knowledge of anything in particular—because she's totally fucking shameless:

HH: Governor, your candidacy has ignited extreme hostility, even some hatred on the left and in some parts of the media. Are you surprised? And what do you attribute this reaction to?

SP: Oh, I think they’re just not used to someone coming in from the outside saying you know what? It’s time that normal Joe six-pack American is finally represented in the position of vice presidency, and I think that that’s kind of taken some people off guard, and they’re out of sorts, and they’re ticked off about it, but it’s motivation for John McCain and I to work that much harder to make sure that our ticket is victorious, and we put government back on the side of the people of Joe six-pack like me, and we start doing those things that are expected of our government, and we get rid of corruption, and we commit to the reform that is not only desired, but is deserved by Americans.

The last candidate I heard refer to himself as a normal person so much was Willie Stark, and he's a (mostly) fictional character. I just hope Biden remembers on Thursday to do what Obama did and swing for the undecideds, not the liberal base; it's surely what Palin's going to do, and when she's not fucking up in a massive way, she can be awfully charming.

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Books Not Cake, but Good Nontheless

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 5:00 PM

Sloane Crosley is the author of the collection of humorous first person essays I Was Told There Would Be Cake. I loved the book. Both Bethany Jean Clement and Slog commenter PopTart hated the book—maybe it's a boy/girl thing?—but I at least have confirmation, with her list of 6 favorite books, that Sloane Crosley is a great reader.

Five of the books—Birds of America by Lorrie Moore, The Chosen by Chaim Potok, Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami, The Garden Party and Other Stories by Katherine Mansfield, and Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion—are wonderful. I haven't read the sixth, On the Edge of Reason by Miroslav Krleza. But the way Crosley describes it, "A droll philosophical novel about a Croatian man who, one day, decides to speak his mind during a dinner party and conversational and social chaos ensue," pretty much guarantees that I'll read it soon.

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2008 Sarah Palin Can't Name a Single Newspaper or Magazine That She Has Ever Read

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 4:49 PM

Can you name another prominent Republican politician who doesn't read newspapers or news magazines? Give up? The answer is here.

He walks into the Oval Office in the morning, Bush said, and asks Card: "What's in the newspapers worth worrying about? I glance at the headlines just to kind of (get) a flavor of what's moving," Bush said. "I rarely read the stories," he said.

Instead, the president continued, he gets "briefed by people who have probably read the news themselves." Rice, on the other hand, is getting the news "directly from the participants on the world stage."

Bush said this had long been his practice.

"I have great respect for the media," he said. "I mean, our society is a good, solid democracy because of a good, solid media. But I also understand that a lot of times there's opinions mixed in with news."

And if there's one thing Bush's aides don't have—besides souls, of course—it's opinions.

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Film It's About Fucking Time

Posted by David Schmader on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 4:38 PM

this%20ain%27t%20the%20munsters%20box%20cover.jpg

TRICK OR TREAT….This Ain’t the Munsters XXX Hits Streets Today!

Hustler Video’s much-anticipated release, This Ain’t the Munsters XXX finally hits streets today!! If you’re wondering how to celebrate Halloween this year, then look no further…Hustler Video brings you the sexiest and naughtiest Halloween treat with the release of This Ain’t the Munsters XXX!!

“This flick will entertain the cum right out of you. It has it all: spot-on acting, great music, highly detailed sets, believable plot and some hot Munster fucking … One of the most entertaining story porns of all time,” enthuses Evan at RanchoCarne.com.

I hate it when Evan at RanchoCarne.com enthuses.

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City Charges Filed Against Green Lake Penis-Wagger

Posted by Jonah Spangenthal-Lee on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 4:17 PM

A 35-year-old Seattle man has been charged with indecent exposure after, prosecutors say, he wagged his genitals—as well as a prosthetic penis—at several teenage girls in Green Lake Park earlier this month.

King County Prosecutors say Kelly Lee Fischer repeatedly exposed himself to a 38-year-old woman, the woman's 17-year-old daughter and her daughter's 18-year-old friend in three separate incidents at Green Lake.

On September 11, records say the 38-year-old woman spotted Fischer at Green Lake, playing with himself through his gray spandex shorts.

The next day, the woman and the two teenage girls were sitting near the park's playground when they saw Fischer in the park—again in his spandex shorts—doing stretches, pelvic thrusts, and masturbating with what was apparently a fake penis attached to his penis with rubber bands.

The girls began laughing at Fischer before he approached them and, court documents say, told them they "must like what they saw," Fischer also told the girls that "what turns me on is you guys looking and laughing," before he left.

Again on September 15 the 17-year-old girl's mother again saw Fischer at Green Lake—this time with a fake penis hanging out of his pants—and called police.

Fischer was arrested and, court documents say, later told an SPD detective that he "has a fetish of exhibitionism" and admitted that in the past he has approached women in his car and asked them for directions before masturbating in front of them.

Court records indicate Fischer has a prior conviction for a similar incident in July 2007 and has also been arrested four times since 1997 for exposing himself, including a 2004 incident where he locked a woman inside of a business so he could expose himself.

Fischer is being held in the King County Jail on $100,000 bail.

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2008 / Nerd Nerds For Obama

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 4:00 PM

I think this is unprecedented. Comic books are usually a fairly apolitical field because lots of comics fans tend to be conservative, but now there's a social network called Comics Industry for Obama. Members include Mike Allred, who created a comic called Madman and also a comic book adaptation of The Book of Mormon, and Mike Mignola, who created Hellboy. The site is for fans and comic pros alike, and its tagline is "Let's make sure the good guy wins." Awww. Also, they have a nice logo. But this doesn't mean you have to suddenly start thinking Hellboy II was a good movie.

Also weird and new to this election cycle: Gamers for Obama. One blog reads:

We need to find ways to help Barack Obama, not simply in the real world, but in the virtual world. We need to create our own echo chamber where we can answer the lies, answer the distortions head on.

We also need to find ways to test messages and understand just how tough a job organizing is and find more effective ways to organize.

I think maybe they got the real world/virtual world bit mixed up, but still: it's nice to see geeks doing their part and being more vocal about politics than they usually are.

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Money “Thanks to their flexible lending rules, Paul got a quick approval”

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:55 PM

This WaMu ad from 1996:

Slog tipper NaFun says, "Not so funny anymore, is it?"

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Games bit Generations = Art Style

Posted by Sam Machkovech on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:54 PM

I've gone Microsoft-heavy with my gaming lately, and for good reason: the Wii's release calendar for the foreseeable future is a motion-controlled mess. Other than this fall's Mushroom Men--a decent-looking Mario clone, but still not that original--it's looking like another year of cheaply made family games that mimic the best of Wii 2006.

The exception, I suppose, is the online Wii Ware store, where the past few weeks have seen fanboy fare like a new Mega Man and some Homestar Runner point-and-click adventures. Fine on both of those--and their respective fanbases have been served solid, authentic fare at a nice price, based on my playtime--but it's hard to get excited about yet another Trogdor joke.

Then yesterday, the Art Style series landed with no advance notice or hype. Not sure why they were so silent; I would've piled on the hype. Nintendo called it bit Generations in Japan, and I fucking loved it. It's as if Nintendo hired some garage developers to make stylish, thoughtful games that could hold their own without having Mario awkwardly slapped on the box--incredibly refined Flash games that even Mom could dig.

From the sound of Nintendo's press blast, they're releasing three of the seven bG titles on Wii Ware by the end of October. No word on the final two yet, but first up yesterday was Orbient, in which you use only two buttons--attract and repel--to pilot a little star around a bunch of other stars, each with their own orbit. The push-pull system becomes imprecise as the game chugs along, but with zillions of easy retry chances and a relaxing, spacey presentation, there's charm in floating around in this one--like a cosmic version of the PS3's flOw. And at $6, it's a steal compared to the older--and simpler--import version. The loving care given to this Wii update bodes well for the rest of these bG-into-AS titles; fingers are crossed for a 2-player version of the bizarre Digidrive.

Up next either this week or early next: Rock Band 2. The game and the updated "instruments" showed up earlier today, and I'll wear 'em out to learn whether or not pretending to be in a band has gotten any better this year.

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Visual Art And the Betty Bowen Winner Is...

Posted by Jen Graves on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:50 PM

Isaac Layman!

Here he is in Middleman, twisting the John Baldessari trick of the artist telling you what to look at:

middleman_27.5x28.jpg

Layman is a totally deserving artist. From the list of finalists the committee was considering—Layman, Wynne Greenwood, Eric Elliott, Alexis Pike, and Nicholas Nyland—I'd have chosen Greenwood myself (um), but Layman's art can also be a sincere sensation. This Box Spring and Apple Tree video, for instance, was as dreamy as a young Balzac hero.

This is one of my favorite Laymans. The shadow around the shirt is real but the rest of the marks are drawn on the shirt itself, so that this is a photograph of a folded shirt with a drawing of a folded shirt on it.

As for Greenwood and Elliott, they won $2,500 each in secondary awards. (More Elliott here.)

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Books Stupid European: "Blah Blah Blah."

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:29 PM

Nobel literature head: US too insular to compete.

STOCKHOLM, Sweden (AP) - Bad news for American writers hoping for a Nobel Prize next week: the top member of the award jury believes the United States is too insular and ignorant to compete with Europe when it comes to great writing.

Counters the head of the U.S. National Book Foundation: "Put him in touch with me, and I'll send him a reading list."

As the Swedish Academy enters final deliberations for this year's award, permanent secretary Horace Engdahl said it's no coincidence that most winners are European.

"Of course there is powerful literature in all big cultures, but you can't get away from the fact that Europe still is the center of the literary world ... not the United States," he told The Associated Press in an exclusive interview Tuesday.

Let's see how he likes our literature when we send Randy "The Macho Man" Savage over there to shove some John Grisham novels down his snooty-ass throat. U!S!A! U!S!A!

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2008 The Zero Shame Game

Posted by Charles Mudede on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:27 PM

Palin!

The original comments came at an Ohio rally Monday, when Palin told the cheering crowd, "I'm looking forward to meeting [Biden] too, I've never met him before — but I've been hearing about his senate speeches since I was in, like the second grade."

Some political observers found that comment peculiar, given her own running mate is the oldest man ever to seek a first presidential term. But Palin said she was merely contrasting the differences she sees between herself and Biden.

She can only see Palin. This man McCain does not exist for her.

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Theater Seriously, New York Times?

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:24 PM

Your review of Twyla Tharp's new works at Pacific Northwest Ballet seems a little... disengaged. You spend most of your words on describing how the choreography looks but not what it might mean.

Tharp's choreography has always been thick with ideas (about gender, about youth culture, about art both haute and pop, about sex and death) and to not wrestle with the ideas (or lack thereof) in two brand-new ballets by the reigning queen of dance seems a little weak. Maybe even a little irresponsible.

(The ballets: Opus 111 is a florid, ballet/kitchen-sink fusion set to Brahms; Afternoon Ball is maudlin tragedy about fucked-up street kids.)

The closest you get is in the final paragraph:

Of the pair, “Opus 111” may be the work that survives in its present form, but there is a sense that, with “Afternoon Ball,” Ms. Tharp has not quite finished exploring the dark side. Her cautionary tale points to a subject larger than dance. If Ms. Tharp is worried about the slipping away of grace and tradition, so should we all be.

You must have ideas about Tharp's ideas—what does it mean, for example that the woman who rocked the dance world by fusing pop with avant garde with ballet has positioned herself as the defender of grace and tradition?—but you veil them.

And that "may be the work that survives in its present form" is an oblique way of saying that, in some respects, the ballet fails. Why don't you state that plainly?

Is it because you feel an obligation to defer to an artist of Tharp's stature? Because you've taken on Pacific Northwest Ballet and its young, imaginative director Peter Boal a pet project? Because you have to justify flying across the country to your editors by making the work seem more important than it is?

What gives?

For comparison's sake, here's The Stranger's review, which will be out in this Thursday's paper:

All Tharp

Pacific Northwest Ballet

Through Oct 5.

Twyla Tharp was once a daring choreographer. Four decades ago, she structurally reorganized the dance world by bringing low-falutin’ movement to high-falutin’ stages. The paradigmatic example: Deuce Coupe, a 1973 commission for the Joffrey Ballet set to the Beach Boys, with graffiti artists painting upstage during the performance. It was the world’s first ballet with a pop soundtrack.

But both of her world-premiere ballets that opened at PNB last weekend—Opus 111 (set to Brahms) and Afternoon Ball (set to minimalist Vladimir Martynov)—seem like burlesques of Tharp’s old glory. In the first dance, Tharp trots out samples from her myriad influences, presenting a Tharpean pupu platter: Broadway skips, jazzy jumps, playful gymnastics, cross-armed kicks redolent of Hungarian czardas, syncopated steps borrowed from tap dancing, and florid ballet. Opus 111 is an airy, insubstantial thing that slides right off the retinas, barely leaving an impression.

Afternoon Ball is more striking, a maudlin tragedy that casts a double gloss—one jaundiced, the other piteous—on youth culture. Three youngsters tweak out in what seems to be an alleyway. (Black walls on the stage give the piece a claustrophobic feeling.) One is a punk/metal hybrid in cutoff cargo pants, one a grunge boy in flannel. The lone girl wears fishnets and Daisy Dukes—a New York punk circa 1985. These are afflicted children: They throw punches, slip and fall, beat their heads on the floor, worm along the ground, and lapse into mindless, mechanical movements.

A fancy couple in black formal wear occasionally dances upstage, oblivious to the small apocalypse below. The lights dim, the punk/metal kid shivers and—spoiler alert!—freezes to death. (Or something.) In Tharp’s world, the kids used to be all right. Not anymore. Afternoon Ball critiques its aloof elites, but also condescends to its shivering, cartoonish urchins. (The evening’s third piece, Nine Sinatra Songs, is a series of ballroom vignettes from 1982. It is easy-listening dance. People love it.)

How crotchety. Time was, Twyla Tharp was an artist doing double duty as a radical critic, bringing Promethean fire to cold, sterile stages. But her new work feels remote and cynical—she has forgotten how to burn. BRENDAN KILEY

(It's been a Tharpapalooza around here for the last two weeks: You can read The Stranger's occasionally tense interview with Tharp here. And listen to it here.)

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Religion Rock Me Sexy Jesus

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:23 PM

A columnist whose work I've never read before, Gwen Daniels, at a student newspaper I've never heard of, The Maneater, at a university I've never visited, the University of Missouri, introduced me to a trend with which I wasn't familiar: Saving your first kiss for your wedding night. Basically it's like saving your virginity for your wedding night only, um, a whole hell of a lot crazier.

Kids? It's a bad enough idea to marry someone prior to determining whether or not you're sexually compatible. But marrying someone before you figure out whether you like how their spit tastes? That's just nuts.

Here's Daniels on the phenomenon:

I first heard of the decision to save kissing for marriage—the virgin lips movement, my best friend and I called it—in Joshua Harris' book I Kissed Dating Goodbye, a Christian relationship guide that advocates courtship and prayerful and deliberate dating with the expressed aspiration to marry, over conventional dating.

In my Southern conservative town, where churches are even more common than Walgreens stores, I Kissed Dating Goodbye is practically required reading for teenage girls.... In Christian relationships, "God wants us to seek guidance from scriptural truth, not feeling," Harris writes. "Smart love looks beyond personal desires and the gratification of the moment. It looks at the big picture: serving others and glorifying God."

How can romance glorify God? Harris suggests that Christians should commit their plans, motives, actions and desires—including dating—to God.

There's so much to say. For instance, what is it with Christians moving the goal posts around? It's no longer enough to be a virgin on your wedding night; now, if you want to be right with God, you better not have kissed before your wedding night. It's no longer enough to seek to ban abortion; now they want to redefine birth control as abortion and ban it too. Gay people were a threat to the family when we were all sex-crazed hedonists getting it on the shrubs; now we're a threat to the family because we want to get married ourselves, have babies, and stand on the sidelines in the rain with other exhausted parents at soccer games.

But here's what really caught my attention: Daniels quotes a student whose eagerness to get down on his knees and serve Jesus seems just a little intense...

Jeff Pudelek, a sophomore at the University of Tennessee-Knoxville, decided to save his first kiss for marriage so that he will continually seek his satisfaction in God, he said.

After ending a long-term relationship, "I began to see that a lot of my relationship decisions were centered around finding satisfaction in a person," Pudelek said. "The truth is that true satisfaction, what I was seeking in relationships with girls, can't be found in any person, only in Jesus Christ."

"I want to enjoy the fullness of what God has for me, and I think that includes cultivating intimacy with him above all else," he added.

Okaaaay. So Jeff really loves Jesus. And here's hoping Jesus comes along and fills you with the fullness you're aching for, Jeff. (Do Jeff's quotes remind anyone else of Faith +1?) And now, apropos of nothing in particular and making no insinuations about Jeff's sexuality whatsoever: Christian girls? You might wanna think twice before marrying a boy who doesn't want—at the very least—to make out with you once or twice prior to your honeymoon. Some God-fearing, red-blooded, robustly-heterosexual Christian boys are willing and able to save their virginities for their wedding nights, of course, and more power to 'em. But make out with your boyfriend at least once before agreeing to marry him—and get close enough to verify that the lump in his pants is a hard cock and not an iPhone, okay?

Because you'll be really sad Christian wives if you wind up marrying boys who claimed that they wanted to kiss you but couldn't because they were saving those first kisses for your wedding nights—and until your wedding night they were finding true intimacy with their Lord, savior and imaginary boyfriend, Jesus Christ—but were actually great, big, scared homos who were able to delay their coming out until after marriage because, thanks to Joshua Harris and his stupid fucking book, your husbands didn't have to perform sexually with a woman in even a minimal fashion until after their wedding nights.

Okay, back to Jeff:

Besides, physical activity such as kissing and intercourse does not sustain relationships, Pudelek said. "I still want to be madly in love with my wife even if we can't kiss anymore," he added.

An uncharitable man might suggest that Jeff sounds like he's looking forward to the day when he and his future wife can't kiss anymore. But I am not an uncharitable man. Instead I'd like to reassure Jeff that the kinds of illnesses that prevent people from kissing their spouses—oral cancers and, um, spontaneous combustion of the lips and tongue—are very, very rare indeed. Once you find a girl willing to marry you, Jeff, you can look forward to kissing that woman over and over again and again, day after day after day, one decade after another, for the rest of your natural life.

Oh, and you get to feel her boobs too—you've got that to look forward to as well. Hmm... boobs. But for now, of course, you can focus on the fullness that Jesus wants to stuff inside you. Hmm... fullness...

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Politics Dems Charge AG with Conflict of Interest in Republican Ethics Case

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:20 PM

The Washington State Republican Party broke election law over the summer but hasn’t been punished. Last week, the state Public Disclosure Commission ruled that the party sent out three mailers that advocated voting for Dino Rossi, at a cost of over $150,000, in violation of state election law. The Republican Party paid for the mailers using a soft money account that is supposed to be used for general party-building, not to advocate for specific candidates. However, as you can see from parts of the mailers, they did advocate for a specific candidate.

As of today, the AG's office hasn't taken action on charges. Democrats are demanding that Republican Attorney General Rob McKenna seek an injunction against the Republicans. They're also seeking that McKenna hire outside counsel to handle the case, citing the fact that Luke Esser, now chairman of the state Republicans, worked for McKenna in the AG’s office and at the King County Council. “There is a conflict of interest,” Steele says.

“Without an injunction in place to say, ‘Hey, shitheads, you can’t do this,’ there is nothing that stops them from doing what they did in the primary again in the general election,” says Steele. “They can flood the mailboxes of every person in the state with mailers for Republican Dino Rossi … even thought the PDC said it's illegal.”

IMG URL John White, Jr., an attorney for the Republicans, defended the mailers by explaining that they were sent “exclusively to members of the Republican party.” Under the top-two primary system, the party is allowed to define its membership however it wants, White said in a statement to the PDC. (Republicans have not returned calls for comment.)

But in its decision, the PDC said the mailers were "not permissible expenditures" as defined under state law. It then recommended that the attorney general’s office take “appropriate action.”

Janelle Guthrie, a spokeswoman for the attorney general, says the AG's office has not decided how it will handle the case, or if Esser's involvemnet presents a conflict of interest. She notes that the office has historically prosecuted most cases on its own, rather that hiring outside counsel, even when charging defendants of the same political party as the sitting attorney general. “I think we will have an announcement soon,” says Guthrie. “Obviously, we're not going to file it after the election.”

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Books It Was the Best of Times, Again, It Was the Worst of Times, Again

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:00 PM

Sydney Carton and the Slingshot of Doom, a Charles Dickens fanfic.

“And where is Evremonde? He must also come,” declared the guard.

“I am right here.” said Sydney as he stabbed the man’s heart with his dagger which he had in his boots.

Blood spilt from the man’s heart as he fell to the hard ground. With haste, Sydney took off the man’s clothes so the blood would not spread and stain. He took off his own clothes, and put on the guard’s.

Wake me when we get to the Great Expectations slash.

(Via the always-entertaining Bookshelves of Doom.)

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City Why We Need a Parking Maximum

Posted by Erica C. Barnett on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 2:40 PM

The building under construction at the north end of Broadway, across the street from the nearly-finished Brix development, is slated to include 357 underground parking spaces--or more than 1.2 parking spaces for every single residential unit in the building.

Contrast that to legislation the city council adopted in 2006, eliminating minimum parking requirements for new buildings in urban centers and around light-rail stations. (Outside urban centers, multifamily buildings must still include 1.25 parking spots per unit). The legislation was an explicit acknowledgment that people who live in dense parts of Seattle don't necessarily need to own a car; it was also intended to reduce the traffic impact of thousands of new center-city residents. The added benefit of eliminating parking requirements is to reduce the cost of housing; parking adds between $20,000 and $30,000 to the cost of a unit.

The problem with simply eliminating minimum parking requirements is that developers can still build as much parking as they want--and that extra $20,000-$30,000 gives them a strong incentive to do just that. It doesn't matter that this new development will be four blocks from a light-rail stop, and on three Metro bus lines; as long as developers can build, and charge for, additional parking spaces, they will.

Parking maximums, in contrast, both acknowledge that you don't need a car to live in the central city and eliminate the incentive to build as much parking as possible. And they work: In San Francisco, maximum parking standards in the densest neighborhoods range from .75 to one parking space per unit. According to one study, housing without parking sells for 12 percent less in San Francisco than housing with parking, and is affordable to 24 percent more households. Other studies have found that reducing residential parking decreases traffic congestion and improves streets for bikers and pedestrians.

Another smart reform--also in San Francisco--requires developers to sell parking separately from residential units. This, again, makes housing cheaper, because people only have to buy as much parking as they need. As Seattle's neighborhoods densify and it becomes easier to get around the city without a car, these are the kind of reforms that both non-drivers (who'll save money on housing costs) and car owners (who'll benefit from reduced congestion in the urban core) should be able to get behind.

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Books Every Spine Tells a Story

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 2:09 PM

Nina Katchadourian has a collection of photos of stories told in book's spines. They're pretty great. This one is my favorite:

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History On the Dissolution of Belgium

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 2:08 PM

So Belgium is trying to break up with itself, like it has since the 19th century when its two ethnic groups—the Flemish (who are slovenly and have chronic coughs) and the Walloons (who are adorable and favor yellow galoshes)—resolved to stop getting along.

The political crisis has paralyzed its government, enhungered its illegal immigrants, and compromised its masculinity.

Which is too bad, since the combined forces of the Flemish and the Walloons have produced some of the world's greatest inventions, including beer, colonialism, and awkward silences.

And, of course, Plastic Bertrand...

... who is, in fact, the new identity of Joseph Pujol, aka Le Pétomane, le grande fartiste.

Some of the highlights of his stage act involved playing a flute through a rubber tube in his anus, farting sound effects of cannon fire and thunderstorms as well as farting La Marseillaise. He could also blow out a candle from several yards away. His audience included Edward, Prince of Wales, King Leopold II of the Belgians and Sigmund Freud.

Mr. Pujol faked his own death in 1945—to get away from child stalkers who followed him around with cigarette lighters—and reinvented himself as Plastic Bertrand.

When asked for comment on the delicate political situation in Belgium, he responded with a YouTube video (be sure to watch when your boss is standing right behind you):

Also: Belgium is an anagram for "I be glum."

I think we all finally understand why.

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Visual Art Beats Me

Posted by Jen Graves on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 1:00 PM

What's Kenneth Callahan, Paul Horiuchi, Dennis Evans, Mark Tobey, Richard Gilkey, and Sherrie Wolf got to do with Damien Hirst?

Beats me, but his Last Supper prints are showing at their gallery, Woodside/Braseth, opening Thursday.

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Fashion Do You Have a Head? Do You Have $200? Do You Hate It When Forest Creatures Are Alive?

Posted by Lindy West on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:59 PM

Welcome to Fur Hat World!

SALE! SALE! SALE!

How about Coonskin Hat With Face for ~~$189.95~~ $129.95:

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Lookin' good there, mannequin. Nothing like a hat with its own face. And here's the ever-popular Coyote Fur Mountain Man Hat for ~~$429.95~~ $289.95:

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Hmmm. It's not a hat, per se, is it? Really more of a dessicated pelt draped o'er the head. I mean, I just don't know if Coyote Fur Mountain Man Hat is a sensible purchase for anyone who isn't the skinned and reanimated innards of a coyote. Realistically, where are you going to wear it? The PTA meeting? The gym?

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Hey, wait! Where are you going? I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Okay, it's a hat, and it looks totally good on you. Yeesh, you're touchy. Please don't be mad.

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That's better. Let's make out.

Thanks to Melissa and Meags for the link.

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2008 / Housekeeping Speaking of VP Debate Parties...

Posted by Megan Seling on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:53 PM

I'm predicting this will be even better/more hilarious than the first presidential debate!

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2008 VP Debate Watch Parties? (Beehive Edition)

Posted by Eli Sanders on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:35 PM

Slog reader Elaine writes:

Eli--do you know of any Sarah Palin look-alike debate parties scheduled for Thursday night? I'm trying to imagine the best place to find dozens of beehives and over-sized eyeglasses watching the event.

Thank you.

Be assured, Elaine, that I will tell the world if I hear of such a thing happening in Seattle. Meanwhile, I continue to collect debate party info for this Thursday (and will publish party listings on Slog starting tomorrow).

Same drill as for the prez debate: If you're hosting a public party for watching the VP debate, shoot me an email. Your email must have "VP Debate Party" in the subject line and must include time and place details, whether your bar/home/restaurant has wireless, whether beehives are involved, and any relevant food or drink specials.

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Money Seen Outside the Washington Mutual Tower

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:34 PM

This morning, Slog tipper Stuart wrote:

Brendan,

Did you see the sign in front of the Wamu building? It must be a joke (not PDL, I already checked): it's one of those change of use signs that states the WaMu building is being converted to condos.

It was gone by the time I got there, but the trip was worth it for this sign:

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Visual Art Alice Wheeler ≠ Nirvana

Posted by Jen Graves on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:31 PM

This is the last straw. Up right now at the dealer's choice show at Wright Exhibition Space in South Lake Union is a photograph by Alice Wheeler of Kurt Cobain wearing sunglasses.

I'm thrilled that Wheeler was selected for the show, because her photographs are electric and strange. The way they use color, movement, and voyeurism? Every one of them is alive.

SO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, CAN WE SEE SOMETHING BESIDES HER KURT COBAIN PHOTOGRAPHS, PLEASE?

Wheeler has plenty of subjects, not just the one. Here are a few.

^{Girl with Orange Hair, Hempfest}

^{What Women See at Night}

^{Yellow Cityscape}

She's represented by Greg Kucera Gallery but hasn't had a show there since 2003. I just called there; she's not on the schedule for 2009.

Say it with me: WE WANT ALICE!

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Books Reading By Numbers

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:24 PM

Via Bookninja:

An editorial says that California's (awful-sounding) reading comprehension rating system for young reader's books is a horrible idea. I agree:

Another problem is that the programs assign different numbers to the same book. "The Magician's Nephew" from the Narnia series by C.S. Lewis, for example, is a 790 Lexile level, a 5.6 Reading Counts level and a 5.4 Accelerated Reader level. "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe," the next book in the series, is listed as 940 Lexile, 6.1 Reading Counts and 5.7 AR. The guidelines could prohibit a child who enjoyed the first novel from reading its sequel because of the conflicting reading levels.

One of the best parts of reading and English for kids is that, unlike math, it's hard to standardize. These stupid, stupid number-grading systems would have totally turned me off from reading in school when I was a kid.

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2008 The Age of Playa Hate

Posted by Charles Mudede on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 12:20 PM

Why Bill Clinton sucks in O8:

[F]ormer President Bill Clinton is the star of a new television ad — for John McCain.

Watch: New McCain ad features Bill Clinton

The Arizona senator's campaign is highlighting Clinton's remarks in an interview with ABC News last week during which he appeared to lay some of the blame of the current economic crisis on congressional Democrats.

"I think the responsibility that the Democrats have may rest more in resisting any efforts by Republicans in the Congress or by me when I was president to put some standards and tighten up a little on Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac," Clinton said in the ABC News interview that is highlighted in the new McCain ad.

At this point, the kindest thing Clinton could do for Obama is to stay at home with his wife until Nov 5th.

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2008 Re: Palin Abortion In Seattle

Posted by Erica C. Barnett on Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 11:50 AM

Unlike Michelle Malkin, I'm not worked up about the "abort Palin" stencil art Jen linked below. I am, however, endlessly annoyed about this ad, which is currently running on dozens of lefty blogs (I grabbed this one from Horse's Ass):

Seriously--of all the zillions of things wrong with this woman, from her absolute ignorance of foreign policy to her insane religious beliefs, the best Vote for Dems could come up with was "yuk, yuk, don't vote for her cuz she has a bush"? Implying (via the brilliant Bush/bush double entendre) that Palin isn't qualified because she has ladyparts constitutes an implicit a dig at all female candidates. And as much as I loathe Palin and everything she stands for, I feel it's my job to point crap like this out--because a sexist dig is a sexist dig, whatever you think of the intended target.

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