There was a rabbi. This rabbi had three sons. The rabbi was also his neighborhood's mohel. (For those of you who, like me, are not of the chosen variety, a mohel is the guy who does the cutting at a bris.)

He had been a mohel for over 30 years and was retiring. In that 30 years, he kept every baby foreskin he cut in a series of gallon jars in his attic. He was never sure why, he just did.

His three sons wanted to get him something nice for his retirement. One of them had the idea to take all those fireskins and have the local leathersmith make something nice.

So when the mohel was asleep, his children made off with the jars of foreskins to create a gift.

A month later the rabbi (who is also a mohel) is having his retirement party. Thousands of now-men whom he'd cut as infants paid their respects.

At the end of the party he was wondering why his three sons hadn't given him a gift yet. Everyone else had and had been very generous.

Finally the oldest came up and gave his father a square box rapped in tissue paper, maybe four inches to a side and about an inch tall.

The rabbi opened it. He liked gifts. Inside was an exquisite leather wallet.

The rabbi was a little disappointed. He said, "After 30 years of serving God you show thanks by giving me a lousy wallet?"

The oldest son took it and started rubbing it vigorously. He said, "But father, it's special. When you rub it, it becomes a briefcase!"

I apologize for that joke.
Posted by Matt Fuckin' Hickey (is in Las Angeles)]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 22:25:08 -0800 The Stranger
I just lost any respect I might have had for editorial standards at Popular Science. Why isn't Golob chiming in on this? Is he on vacation or defending his thesis or on the wards or something?
Posted by rob]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 20:24:05 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Doug Nufer]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 18:39:33 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Urgutha Forka]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 17:06:01 -0800 The Stranger
I think staying clean is easy, I think this was more of a conscious decision to not clean because laziness occasionally trumps courtesy. And I would still consider the average Swede to be cleaner and more sophisticated than the average American. Consider my friend an edge case.

Is there an equivalently curdish pitfall with ladies' fibroblasts?
Posted by jackie treehorn]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:36:55 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Greg]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:16:24 -0800 The Stranger
Sounds like a confirmation that said cheese does exist and regenerates every 24 hours.

I wonder if this cheese is also rich in fibroblasts.
Posted by jackie treehorn]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:16:01 -0800 The Stranger
Also, he sounds like a slob and an asshole. Who doesn't clean their genitals on a regular basis? It's not like it builds up in a couple of minutes, showering properly every day should keep it nice and clean.
Posted by DK]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:10:27 -0800 The Stranger Posted by super, super gross]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:37:13 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Sargon Bighorn]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:35:58 -0800 The Stranger
Because of this anecdote:

When I was in grad school in Holland I had a great friend from Sweden, who, like most non-Americans, was uncut. One night as we were drinking beer at his place before he went out on a date, he thought out loud whether or not he should take a shower and clean the cheese out of his dick before potentially going home with this girl later and sticking his cheesy peen in her what have you. Then he reconsidered, stating that he didn't really like her THAT much, not enough to do her the kindness of de-cheesing his shit, but that he planned on going for gold that night anyway.

Sure, he may be a cheesy dick himself, but he was in almost all measurable ways a really nice and normal guy.

Go ahead and leave that cheese-trapping foreskin on there, it probably won't do much to change the course of the kid's life, and a mouthful of lint-y forecheese probably never killed anyone.
Posted by jackie treehorn]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:21:25 -0800 The Stranger
"Bris milah -- no, we will not let you go! (Let him go!)"
Posted by --MC]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:19:47 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Urgutha Forka]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:08:56 -0800 The Stranger
"Smooth as a baby's dick"
Posted by Karla]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:55:50 -0800 The Stranger Posted by bronkitis]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:54:00 -0800 The Stranger Posted by Timrrr]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:44:05 -0800 The Stranger Posted by muggims]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:43:34 -0800 The Stranger Posted by elenchos]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:41:36 -0800 The Stranger Posted by ellarosa]]> Fri, 21 Nov 2008 14:35:26 -0800 The Stranger