Um, is Bill Cosby sauced? Sloshed? Sh*t-canned? Blitzed-bombed-smashed? I think he's wearing his drunky-pants on national TV... Go Ohio State Chitlin Legs!

There's no better feeling than getting WHAT done?

^{Happy HUMP!-ing Seattle!}

Literally. Lunchtime quickies for married people. I thought Sugar Daddy was wild. Miss Ashley raises the bar. Wow.

"We live in a scary world." - Megan the Neighbor, Fairfield Ohio

Baaawk! Sarah Palin Wanna Cracker? And/Or I Love You John Cleese...

Real or fake? If it's real, I wonder what happened after they fished her outta the pool...

Ah ha haaa! You funny vegans with all your "funny" rules. Ah ha ha! Hooo! That's rich. Funny, funny vegans!

I love you Betty, you horny ole' gal...

Monkeys not only make good waiters, they're great babysitters too!

How's your DAD doing? Zoinks!

Man, I really miss daytime TV sometimes...

Sarah Palin Sex Tape Leaked!

^{(and/or your last reminder to make that HUMP! film this weekend... entries due Monday, Oct 6.)}

Only five more days to make a HUMP!... Uh, Bust a Nut^TM!

Lunchtime Quickie^TM, now with totally SFW (safe for work) porn...

Will someone please give this motherf*cker one of those little gold-and-lucite statuettes that says Employee of the Month?

^{Hat tip to Uncle Vinny!}

And now, winner of the Best Job in the World^TM category: The 1950's Italian Police Motorcycle Drill Team...

Ooh. NOT a good day for ole Chip Maxham, weatherman...

If you think you're having a bad day at work, please note, it can't be half as bad as this guy's, PART TWO...

If you think you're having a bad day at work, please note, it can't be half as bad as this guy's...

(audio NSFW)

Not to be outdone by CNN-Lehman-Brothers prank... um, OINK!

Big Gay Wall Street?

O Canada #3! After the post-election move to Canada, we'll be eating this 24 hours a day...

O, Canada! #2 - Another good reason to migrate north after the election is their policies on smoking (or at least the fact that they once made these crazy-ass anti-smoking commercials)...

With all the election panic, and talk of moving to Canada, why don't we take a look at some of the fun things to do once we get there...

O, Canada! #1

And now, a message from America's Best Christian^TM Betty Bowers:

^{Her voice sure sounds a lot like this other all-time, super-classic, favorite of favorites, Welcome To My Home? Hat tip to Scottie Yahtzee!}

I had a terrible dream last night that involved a wolf, a broken BB gun, and my grade school bully. I blame this YouTube video. And you, Sarah Palin, I blame you...

Sarah Palin and God, God, and more God...

Look alive, at 0:25...

Hey Lindy! Have some ice cream!

Not all men of the cloth lie about their porn collections, or dress like clowns so they can bad-touch little boys. Meet Fratello Metallo. He just loves a little Metallica...

These guys perform at weddings, and events in Pakistan? It hurts my brain...

Angel Matos and his "brain explosion" take The Gold for most memorable Olympic moment...

"I have an incomplete album that I want to finish. I have been thinking about the plan during my days in jail, I have sung rock 'n' roll for 40 years. After jail, I will continue to rock 'n' roll." - Gary Glitter

Because no woman likes a seat belt all up in her tiddys...

First Bigfoot, now these guys? What a month!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: August 12, 2008 BIGFOOT BODY FOUND. DNA evidence and photo evidence to be presented at a Press Conference to be held: Date: Friday, August 15, 2008 Time: From 12 Noon-1:00 pm Place: Cabana Hotel-Palo Alto (A Crown Plaza Resort) 4290 El Camino Real, Palo Alto, California 94306

I kinda wish I was there to listen to these yahoos try to convince everyone that their discovery of the Tooth Fairy, I mean Bigfoot is NOT a hoax...

Americans are so obsessed with this, I think it's high time we paid more attention to the beauty of this. Me personally, when I finally scratch that winning lotto ticket in the 7-Eleven parking lot, I will, without one doubt, buy myself one of these:

How come they get Pânico...

... and we get America's Next Top Model, Smallville, One Tree Hill, Veronica Mars, and an endless supply of NOT-funny-nor-was-it-ever Seinfeld re-runs. It's not f*cking fair.

The 2008 Olympics should have been held in Brasil not Beijing... who's with me?