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Nightlife Category Archive

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Y'all Are So Cute

posted by on December 13 at 8:38 PM

Seriously. Thank you to everyone who came down to Moe Bar... RTM, Fnarf and Mrs. Fnarf, Dan, Monique, Comte, Will, Catalina, Andrew, Dave, Wise Punk, Monkey Fist, Scary Tyler Moore, Rhett, Mr. Poe, all the rest whose names have already sunken into the murk of my memory... THAT was fun. We had more than 40 people show up and truly, everyone was nice and articulate and interesting. Thank you so much for making Slog Seattle's best blog (by far). I will see you at the next Slog Happy—Thursday, January 10, 6 pm.

Tonight Is the Night

posted by on December 13 at 11:04 AM

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The Slog community is gathering at Moe Bar tonight for the first go at a new monthly party (provided we get through tonight with no fist fights). You'll find name tags, Stranger swag, happy-hour drink specials, and Sloggers near the back of the bar.


Wednesday, December 12, 2007

A Man After Charles' Own Heart

posted by on December 12 at 8:27 PM

A man nearly died from alcohol poisoning after quaffing a liter (two pints) of vodka at an airport security check instead of handing it over to comply with new carry-on rules, police said Wednesday.

Slog Happy Tomorrow

posted by on December 12 at 5:06 PM

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You might want to spend a little extra time on your hair in the morning.

More On That Showbox Sale

posted by on December 12 at 3:32 PM

What does this:

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Have to do with this?

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I'm glad you asked.

Believe it or not, the just-announced, previously-speculated sale of the Showbox to AEG Live has a connection to the creationist kooks at the Discovery Institute.

One of the Discovery Institutes's biggest financial backers is Philip Anschutz, the "A" in AEG Live. Anschutz has also thrown money at a number of republicans, including Mitt Romney, Ted Stevens, Rick Santorum, Orrin Hatch, George Bush and Larry Craig.

Anschutz probably isn't going to be taking over the booking at the Showbox anytime soon, but who knows, maybe Discovery Institute will get to use the venue to host their the glamorous
Shoe Awards
.


Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Meet and Greet Thursday

posted by on December 11 at 7:49 PM

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Slog Happy This Thursday

posted by on December 11 at 9:04 AM

SlogHH.jpgWe're throwing a party for you, Slog readers—a monthly happy hour at Moe where we can kvetch and gossip and laugh in person. You are going to be tired of looking at this ad by Thursday; for that I apologize. I just want to make sure everyone is in the loop. See you Thursday?


Monday, December 10, 2007

You Are Invited

posted by on December 10 at 1:17 PM

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Please join us at Moe's on Thursday at 6 pm for the inaugural Slog Happy. Set your keyboard aside, put some pants on, and come share a drink or two with your favorite (and least favorite) Sloggers, Slog commenters, and Slog readers. Name tags provided. Drink specials in effect. Hope you can make it.


Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Department of Unsubstantiated Rumors

posted by on December 4 at 9:10 AM

Slog tipper Mat writes...

I'm at the Twilight Exit, and thses two guys are talking about where "Sugar's used to be" (sic). From what they're saying, contingent on getting a liquor license, it will be occupied by a bar centered around--really--the wing dome. Yah. Rad.

Grain of salt, I'm just emailing as I hear it. But they sound pretty confident. I'm shrugging my shoulders.


Monday, December 3, 2007

New Year's Parties, Comin' Atcha!

posted by on December 3 at 12:02 PM

Are you hosting a New Year's Eve event that's open to the public? Do you want to be in our special listing section?

All events qualify, whether they be concerts, raves, readings, or whatever else you could possibly think of. (No circle-jerks, please.)

The deadline for the listings is TUESDAY, DECEMBER 18TH. Please email your listings to music@thestranger.com, and put something about New Year's in the subject so I can pick it out from Spam Mountain.

2008 is gonna rock!

Letter of the Day

posted by on December 3 at 10:43 AM

A reader writes:

I really found the article, "The Death of East Pine", very interesting. Learning about the history of that neighborhood, its growth, and the many changes was entertaining and informational. What I did not find interesting, or even respectful, was the following statement:

"Through three decades, this block was a hub for Seattle music, nightlife, art, fashion, and small business. Also, prostitution, homosexuality, and drug use."

Why is homosexuality referred to in the same sentence as prostitution and drug use? How does that have any relation to those subjects? I find it degrading and bigoted for Eric Grandy to imply that those three items are in the same category, and that The Stranger was willing to print that statement.

While I understand that The Stranger is a cutting edge newspaper that provides opinionated editorials on many different issues, and that it is difficult to please every reader, but I had to speak out that I found this statement highly offensive and derogatory. I can only hope that future articles do not elicit the same narrow-mindedness.

Saturday, December 1, 2007

What Happened Last Night?

posted by on December 1 at 3:56 PM

In case you're wondering what went down at The Belmont Friday night, Christopher has a report on Line Out.

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Thursday, November 29, 2007

A Night of Entertainment at 20/20

posted by on November 29 at 2:10 PM

There’s a fun event happening tomorrow night at 20/20 Cycle:

Oliver Orion presents music and light objects.
Jenny Asarnow is Sweet Potatoes.
Band Anna plays musical saw.
Two members of the Curious Mystery play solo: Nicolas Gonalzes plays his contraptions. Shana Cleveland sings her heart out.
MC duties and storytelling by Alex Kostelnik.

Cookies will be served. Bicycles will be everywhere.

Fri Nov 30 at 20/20 Cycle
2020 E Union St, 568-3090
8 pm, $5 suggested donation.

The show will also be broadcast on Hollow Earth Radio.

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Wednesday, November 28, 2007

To Mark Pony Closing Tonight

posted by on November 28 at 3:30 PM

"As We Stumble Along" from Drowsy Chaperone seems somehow appropriate...

Gotta love these lyrics...

It's a dismal little world in which we live.

It can bore you till you've nothing left to give.

Seven overrated wonders, sever underwhelming seas.

Six excrusciating continants.

Antarctica. Oh please.

But you musent let it lick you

This planet oh so bland.

Keep your eyeball on the highball

In your hand.

See you later at Pony, kids. I'll be playing Ms. PacMan with Ecce Homo in the corner of the main room, highball in hand.

Letter of the Day

posted by on November 28 at 10:11 AM

Editor,

Not that I think that you would bother to publish it anyway, but if there are any pics of girls in bras dancing last night at the Pony, we don't really want to be in the Stranger, if that camera was one of yours.

Thanks.


Sunday, November 25, 2007

Last Stop

posted by on November 25 at 12:42 PM

The Bus Stop--that mighty little bar being demolished for condos on Pine St--will karaoke its swan song tonight.

It is the end of days...

Our last day in this incarnation is today. So please: all of you that we love, or love us, come and celebrate all that we have been together.

The last super awesome Valpak happy hour till 8 with your host Ade and then the final installment of Bus Stop Karaoke...also with you host Ade. Rodney, Susanna, and Niki will all be working. Melt-downs and madness to ensue...as only fitting.

We'll be starting karaoke at 9:00 PM instead of 10 PM. Due to the nature of the event we strongly encourage people to show up early.

Thanks again to all of you that have helped make this bar something we are all proud to have been a part of. Our time together has been a privilege and you will all be missed more than you know.

-The Bus Stop

Erica wrote about the block's impending demolition in this excellent feature. Bus Stop and the other businesses between Summit and Belmont Aves on E Pine St will be replaced by this.

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If only Metro could serve drinks and play tunes as good as yours... Thanks for the good times, Bus Stop.


Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Sugar's Down -- Is Pony Up?

posted by on November 20 at 5:43 PM

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The building that formerly housed Sugar has been there forever and it's got a long and sordid history. Marcus and the gang behind Pony--the temporary bar/installation in the former Cha Cha/Bimbo's space on Pine--created a gay bar that looks like its been there forever and seems to have a long and sordid history.

The building Pony's in is about to come down, of course, and the space Sugar's in is about to open up. Is anyone thinking what I'm thinking?

No one has been able to make a club work in the space that housed Sugar--and the Easy, et al--for very long. It seems to me that most have failed because they were at war with what that space is, with how that space feels. Club owners have tried to create bars in Sugar's space that were clean & classy & often gay in an upscale, do-your-crunches, dance-shirtless way.

It seems to me that Marcus, if he could get his hands on Sugar's space, could do something with it that plays to the location and the space's strengths--something that embraces the space's awkward and sleazy feel, something that lets the space be the dark and dirty hole it wants to be, something that reeks of poppers and sweat and pinball.

Something, you know, like Pony.


Thursday, November 15, 2007

Dept. of Alcohol

posted by on November 15 at 3:47 PM

Tonight at Tini Bigs on Denny: In celebration of 4,000 continuous days in operation (including holidays, Windstorms™, and times of civil unrest), martinis are $4 from 7 p.m. until close. Ten-ounce martinis. Carnage! (Recommended before, during, and/or after: tamales at Bandits Bar.)

Always at El Tajin on Broadway: The dirtiest-minded drinks in town. At the tamer end of the spectrum: The Whore, Screw You, Mexican Asshole, 1-900-FUCKMEUP, A Piece of Ass. What, no Donkey Punch?


Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Spooky and Scary!

posted by on October 31 at 3:40 PM

Going somewhere tonight, and still don't have a costume? You could always Right Wing it...

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The New Scary

posted by on October 31 at 1:10 PM

Halloween used to be scary because the darkness of night was scary, and the goblins and the ghouls who owned that night were scary. But now we have flashlights, inconclusive ghost-hunter videos, and a toll-free number for Ghostbusters.

But adults still want to be scared. So we are petrified that our kids, if released into the Halloween night, will be killed—even though stories of strangers giving out poisoned candy are almost entirely unsubstantiated.

Children also want to be scared. They are scared of the dark. Even more, they are scared of knocking on a stranger’s door and asserting themselves. But fewer and fewer kids get to challenge either fear. We cart them off to official Halloween functions in gymnasiums or at the mall. In lieu of darkness and strangers, kids’ remaining fear is sex. So, to make Halloween scary for them, retailers push costumes like this.

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This scares us all. And this is how we want to be scared. Yikes.


Friday, October 12, 2007

Meet You at the Rendezvous!

posted by on October 12 at 5:40 PM

This is my last post for the day. Thank you very much to The Stranger and to the Slog community for letting me do this! It's been great fun. Like a highly addictive drug, I'm already unsure how to give it up. Cold turkey seems so drastic. The comments section will have to serve as my methadone until I can walk away clean.

As I leave for happy hour, I want to raise a glass or six to the splendid Rendezvous Bar in Belltown. This place truly does shine through the ugliness of the Belltown bar scene, like a nugget of gold in a mountain of shit. Among its top virtues? It still only costs $75 bucks to rent the Jewelbox Theatre for a show. Seventy-Five bucks?!?!? That means if only 15 of your cheap friends buys a $5 ticket to see your punk band, you've paid yourself back for the space! If five more friends buy tickets, the whole band gets beer! That kicks ass.

Equally important, if not more so, the staff is the last remaining friendly bar staff in all of Belltown. They smile, they chat, they don't give you a heard time about your haircut, and they remember what you drank last time. This is a class joint. Here's long time bar babe, Babe.

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Babe: I'm one of three staff who has been here for five years, ever since Steve and Rene bought the place. The others have been here four years, three-and-a-half, something like that. It says something great about a bar of all places that the staff doesn't turn over.

I'll say it does! Here's to all you Sloggers, to Babe, and to the rest of the Rendezvous staff. See you soon! Whiskey soda! (…but you already knew that.)

So What Did We Need That Night Club Ordinance For Again?

posted by on October 12 at 5:20 PM

According to the late online edition of The Seattle Times, two recently-in-the-news night spots may get their liquor licenses yanked, courtesy of the WASLCB: Tabella, and Tommy's

The violation notices, posted Thursday, were the result of "numerous citations" meted out to the clubs during the August "Operation Publicity Stunt" sting conducted by SPD.

According to records on-file with the Liquor Board, "Tabella received five citations alleging serving liquor to a minor, over-serving liquor, one disorderly conduct citation involving firearms and another involving drugs", while Tommy's was cited eight times for violations including "disorderly conduct, over-serving liquor, an employee drinking, and serving liquor to a minor."

Attorney David Osgood, representing Tabella is stating the original charges won't stick, but in any case the Times is indicating it's a "moot point" in that case, since the club is already slated to be sold.

Heyyy

posted by on October 12 at 4:16 PM

Well, Seattle... I'm heading out! It's been a fun day, contributing modestly and enjoying every second of it. I was terribly scared, but you weren't so bad after all!

I leave you with my thanks and this gorgeous picture--ripped from Bergdorf's sleepwear. There's just something about pajama pants paired with killer abs. Mmmm...

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Michael Ian Black & Michael Showalter Tonight

posted by on October 9 at 2:07 PM

Two-thirds of Stella will be performing at Neumo's tonight. Here's what I said in this week's Up & Comings:

MICHAEL IAN BLACK AND MICHAEL SHOWALTER
(Neumo's) Technically this isn't a rock show, but it sure as hell will rock. God that's a terrible intro. I'm really sorry. I'm under a lot of pressure here! It's really hard to write about two of the funniest men in America (as voted by me) without (a) using their own jokes as examples and ruining them, (b) coming off like a fangirl with a ridiculous grade-school crush on the class clown, or (c) making them sound not funny at all by desperately insisting they are. But I swear to Christ Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter, two-thirds of the dildo-obsessed comedy troupe Stella, are hilarious. Their exaggerated facial expressions alone make me nearly piss my pants, and Black's deadpan delivery only makes Showalter's self-deprecation and giddy desire to be loved that much funnier. MEGAN SELING

And while we're talking about Stella, here's one of my favorite shorts (NSFW):

Yup, that's Paul Rudd.

If you want more ideas of what to do tonight, head over to Line Out.


Monday, October 8, 2007

How Can You Get Drunk and Win $1,250?

posted by on October 8 at 4:24 PM

Tonight! Details over on Line Out...


Sunday, September 9, 2007

Insecurity

posted by on September 9 at 4:23 PM

It's in the PI...

Police have issued arrest warrants for employees at 14 Seattle nightclubs after an investigation showed they admitted minors and served them alcohol and at least twice allowed an undercover police officer carry a pistol into a club.

The operation, which spanned 10 days, ended Saturday when police served the warrants and made arrests at all but three of the nightclubs. It also comes as the City Council is taking up Mayor Greg Nickels' proposal to more tightly regulate nightclubs.

Police Chief Gil Kerlikowske said at Tabella Restaurant and Lounge--a Belltown nightclub that Nickels wants to be stripped of its liquor license--security staff felt a pistol during a pat down, but still allowed the undercover officer to enter....

Police said the 15 nightclubs, in the University District, Pioneer Square, Belltown and one in Capitol Hill, were selected because of previous alcohol violations, but did not elaborate on specifics of previous violations or how they were chosen.


Wednesday, September 5, 2007

It's in the News-Paper

posted by on September 5 at 12:35 PM

The intrepid souls at the Seattle Post-Intelligencer discover the existence of a local speakeasy—pardon, "speak-easy"—attempt to gain admittance ("my reporter self was intrigued"!), and fail. Some people got in—a year ago to the day. Speak-easy! So quaint. What the fuck dictionary are they using down there?

[UPDATE: Nota bene: The gaming at the speak-easy ceased a while back, and the speak-easy—which is indeed a private club—has moved.]


Monday, September 3, 2007

Lightning Storm

posted by on September 3 at 11:05 PM

Either that or it's the world's biggest photo shoot. I've been watching the flashes for the last five minutes at least--just happened again, did you see that!? It's getting stonger and stronger. If you're on Capitol Hill, look toward the skyline. Best of all, it's silent.


Saturday, August 25, 2007

Love Letter to Marcus Wilson

posted by on August 25 at 3:21 PM

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I finally got a chance to check out Pony, the new-ish bar on Pine where the old Cha-Cha used to be.

I know this spot has already been written about tons on Slog and in the paper. Quick: Former Cha-Cha bartender Marcus Wilson (aka, comeback DJ, performance artist, sci-fi rock commander Ursula Android) opened Pony when the Cha-Cha moved east of Broadway and over a block to Pike.

Wilson's place gives me hope for Seattle. Despite the condo invasion, the money pigs, Mayor Nickels, and the Grateful Dead/Doors/Jimi Hendrix on the Juke in Fremont, the weirdoes are alive and well. Pony is all Venus lipstick and Martian bracelets and air hockey and booze and dirty and dark.

I also caught Wilson's band's set (Ursula and the Ononos) which was great for a million reasons, starting with the fact that he's the manager of the place. So, his 21st Century make-up face Andromeda Galaxy rock in the lower-level room, added to the sense that Pony is just Wilson's cozy basement where we're all invited to goof and flirt.

At a time when weirdo culture has been colonized out of existence, Wilson deserves sainthood for his tireless efforts to keep the witchcraft alive.

"War is Over if You Want!"


Wednesday, August 22, 2007

"Stop Feeding the Dog from the Table, from the Plate on Top of It!"

posted by on August 22 at 11:20 AM

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As Scorsese obsessives are aware, my subject line is a quote from GoodFellas, the greatest of all Scorsese films, which is screening tonight in the tricked-out parking lot of Havana.

If the opportunity to watch one of the most entertaining Great Films of all time in the well-stocked parking lot of a bar isn't enough to tempt you out on a Wednesday evening, consider this information released today by Havana's Quentin:

Via Tribunali is setting up a portable pizza parlor in the Havana parking lot. Dino, Tribunali's Pizzaiolo, is a master chef from the heart of Napoli, and he'll be manning the wood-fired oven all night. This is a real treat, a gesture of profound generosity, and something that happens when a neighborhood comes together. It's old school, and it's the way things ought to be.

In addition to great cinema and freakishly accessible pizza, tonight features pre- and post-show music from DJs Cherry Canoe and Self-Administered Beatdown. Admission is $5, gates open at 7:30 PM, movie begins around 9:00, and the forecast calls for 75 degrees and sunny.

See you there. Until then, contemplate the brilliance of this painting. ("One dog goes this way, the other goes that way, and this guy says, 'Whaddya want with me?'")


Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Laffhole All Ages Next Week

posted by on August 14 at 2:34 PM

When Laffhole moved from the Capitol Hill Arts Center to Chop Suey, they lost one thing: Laffstravaganza, their monthly all ages/21+ two shows plus a band wingnut of a night of entertainment. Other than Sundays in Ballard at Mr. Spot's Chai House, it was the only place young 'uns could go pick up some comedy.

Next week (8/22), Laffhole is going to be all ages once again (but not permanently), so if you are underage you should make sure to show up to see what is always a pretty funny time. Next Wednesday's show features Dartmondo, Sean McCarthy, and Xung Lam.


Thursday, August 9, 2007

About Time

posted by on August 9 at 5:24 PM

Karaoke singer beaten on stage.


Monday, August 6, 2007

Westneat Goes Clubbing

posted by on August 6 at 4:04 PM

Seattle Times' columnist Danny Westneat hit the clubs this weekend. He wanted to see for himself just how bad things are in, as he puts it, "Seattle's Bermuda Triangle of nightlife." And for most of the evening things were calm. But at 1:37 in the morning...

...all hell breaks loose.

In Belltown Billiards, about 100 people are dancing and downing last-call shots when bright lights come on and the "push out" begins. That's when every bar closes and empties onto the street to make the state-ordered 2 a.m. closing.

A fight erupts in a dark parking lot at Western and Blanchard. A man throws a beer bottle at another man, who rushes him.

Up the street it's worse. A mini-rumble starts in the push out from the most jammed club, the See Sound Lounge. A man is body-slammed into a 10-foot window fronting a haute cuisine restaurant, Mistral. A waterfall of glass showers down on the wrestling men, the sidewalk, the street.

The men bolt. The crowd gets volatile, taunting and shoving. A bouncer tells me later that someone pulled a gun.

Westneat wonders whether later closings times--or staggered closing times, or no closing times at all--might help alleviate the problem. Most Seattle clubbers don't start heading until after 11:30 these days. That leaves at best two hours for drinking, dancing, and hooking up. When last call rolls around people start "drinking against the clock," pounding one or two more back before the lights come up and security starts shoving everyone out on to the streets at the exact same time. Most clubbers are drunk and few are sorted and ready to head home.

Westneat points to London as a positive example of later closing times. After being forced to close at 11 P.M. for decades all the pubs in the UK can now legally serve drinks 24 hours a day. Alcohol-related assaults down by 15 percent, Westneat writes.

But most of the news coming out of the UK makes the new 24-hour drinking rules look like a disaster. It pains me to link to these stories because I would like to see later or staggered closing times myself. But the conservative London Timesreports...

Ministers hoped that staggered opening hours and later closing times introduced by the 2003 Licensing Act would limit offences committed by the drunken crowds that surged onto the streets at the traditional 11pm closing time. But a report published by the Home Office last week shows that many of the troubles have merely been postponed.

Crime is certainly down at the old closing time. In the year after November 2005, when the changes were introduced, there were 3,523 fewer offences of violence, disorder or criminal damage between 9pm and midnight. But in the hours between midnight and 6am the number of offences rose by 13,852. The bright spot, according to the Home Office, is a 5% drop in serious violent crime during the night.

Says the panicky Telegraph...

Gordon Brown has ordered a review of 24-hour drinking laws following concern that it is leading to binge drinking and more alcohol-related violence....

A Home Office report last week disclosed that offences of assault, criminal damage and harassment between 3am and 6am rose sharply in the 12 months following the reforms.

Ministers had argued that staggered and later closing times would reduce crime by avoiding the traditional 11pm rush on to the streets, which often led to violence.

Researchers at London's St Thomas' Hospital found that the number of alcohol related visits to the accident and emergency department trebled after 24-hour drinking laws were introduced in the capital.

The Guardian finds a little good news...

Statistics published last week showed a small increase in violent disorder, criminal damage and harassment committed between 6pm and 6am. A study at St Thomas' hospital in London also recorded an increase in violent crime linked to the relaxed licensing laws.

It has also been argued that 24-hour drinking makes it easier for the police to handle drink-related violence as it is no longer concentrated all at one time as drinkers leave pubs.

But we don't have to go with either 2 A.M. closing times or 24-hour drinking. Staggered closing times might be a better idea--a mix of 2 A.M. and 4 A.M. bars--or allowing clubs to stay open after they stop serving alcohol, so clubbers can stay and dance it off, hang out, and leave when they're ready and, perhaps, a bit soberer.

But if you want to argue for later closing times, or no closing times, it might be best to look for examples other than the UK.


Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Ice Bar: Bullshit or What?

posted by on July 31 at 3:45 PM

Kurrent, with its backwards-"k" logo and much-anticipated "ice bar," is now open on Pine Street. The ice bar proves to utilize the same technology as deployed at The Parlor, an upscale billiards hall on the second floor of Lincoln Square in Bellevue (reviewed, sort of, here)—it's not a bar made of ice, nor a bar that is ice-topped, but a bar with a stripe of ice running its length.

But does resting your drink upon a stripe of ice produce the intended effect of optimal drink chill, or is it a bullshit gimmick? As part of The Stranger's tireless effort to serve the drinkers of Seattle—nay, the Pacific Northwest and the entire world—Bar Exam asked Science. (The Stranger now has a science columnist, one Jonathan Golob, who is pursuing a M.D./Ph.D. at the U.W. that involves, to the best of Bar Exam's primitive understanding, laboratory experimentation with stem cells, AIDS, and glowing things. Welcome, Science!)

Dear Science,

Stripe of ice down bar for resting drink on for optimal chill of drink: bullshit, on the main, yes? Also: What conducts cold better: glass or stainless steel? [Some glassware at Kurrent is actually stainless-steelware.]

Yours Truly,

Bar Exam

Dear Bar Exam,

On the main, yes, [it is indeed bullshit,] says Science. This is quite similar to a piece of lab equipment used to embed frozen tissues in gel, so that they might be cut. And steel conducts heat 16 times better than glass. [Per subsequent discussion, it is revealed that COLD IS JUST REMOVING HEAT. What will Science think of next?!?]

Combining the two questions, one would imagine a stainless steel drinking vessel would be ideal to transfer the cold—or take away the evil evil heat, as the physicists would say. My dreamiest future-drink technology: a Peltier effect–based chilling of metal drink vessels. Pass a current across two dissimilar metals, and one can cool one metal while heating another; welcome to the self-chilling drink.

At your service,

Science

Indeed. Thank you, Science!

metalmartini.jpg


Monday, July 30, 2007

What Was the Block Party Like?

posted by on July 30 at 10:21 AM

Everything you need to know is contained in this clip:

Megan posted it here on Slog yesterday--with a recap of Line Out's on-the-spot Block Party coverage this weekend--but it makes for such happy Monday morning viewing I just had to post it again.

Who is this guy? He should get some sort of prize.


Friday, July 27, 2007

Notes on Religion: Against Symbolism

posted by on July 27 at 12:41 PM

We can separate Christians into two great camps: on one side, those who read the events in the New Testament as having literally happened; on the other side, those who read the events as symbolic. We can also determine those in the former category as tending to be politically conservative, and those in the latter as tending to be liberal. But, ultimately, Christian symbolists have a much weaker theological position than literalists. Why? Because symbolism reduces the bible to picture-thinking, a lower order of language that speaks to those in the lower orders--the poor, the uneducated, the great unwashed. To grasp the complexity of God, they need a simple and symbolic explanation. In short, symbolism is snobbish.

Also, if you don't take Jesus' death and resurrection literally, it means that God could have told the story of salvation in another way. Meaning, it empties the real life of Jesus of its peculiarity and makes it nothing more than an expression of a universal language. Meaning, the story is not fixed but is rewritable. Meaning, God could easily have used different characters and locations and not lost the substance of His message--salvation. But the victory and significance of Christianity is that it transforms God's infinity into a particular, an individual. It humanizes the spirit.

Christian symbolists hold onto the New Testament by its tail; Christian literalists ride the feral book on its back.


Thursday, July 26, 2007

Night Flying

posted by on July 26 at 9:45 PM

Someone was just trying to fly a kite on the baseball field at Cal Anderson. Wasn't working. There's no wind, and it's dark.

Eddie Izzard...

posted by on July 26 at 3:38 PM

... is coming to the Seattle Rep, August 11 and 12.

Tickets go on sale on July 30 at seattlereptickets.org.

They're fifty fucking dollars.

Doesn't that seem a bit steep? I mean, do people still like Eddie Izzard? (And do they know he was born in Yemen?)

Here's Eddie on the letters of St. Paul:

Funny. But not fifty fucking bucks funny.

Party Crasher Goes Looking for Trouble at the Mayor's "Five Most Violent Clubs in Seattle"

posted by on July 26 at 11:57 AM

bars.jpg

And what does he find? Well, here he is taking a leak at the J&M...

A word for those who think they can easily buy drugs in nightclub bathrooms: All the clubs on this list either have tiny bathrooms with urinals so close that straight men want to flee them immediately, or they feature a kindly attendant. The J&M's bathroom attendant is a lovely man with a few teeth who sprays soap on your hands, tells you that you look very sexually attractive to the opposite sex, and pats you on the back when you tip him. Selling or buying drugs in front of him would feel like having sex with a Wal-Mart greeter.

And here he is walking into Wild Palms...

I hand off [my contraband] sweatshirt to some friends and head inside. Behind me, someone moans, "What's up with all these white people tonight?" There goes the neighborhood; I'm the seventh honky in the place, and it's packed wall-to-wall...

He even ventures into Venom...

The owners of Venom must've designed it for people who think their other drinking establishment, Cowgirls Inc., is too subtle. Dozens of security people circulate, poking and prodding anyone who stands still for more than a minute; keep wandering about like cattle or they'll bodily move you...

What does our intrepid man-about-First-Avenue conclude about the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad clubs on the mayor's list? Find out here.


Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Go to Laff Hole. Tonight. Laff Hole—Go!

posted by on July 25 at 1:12 PM

Tonight is Seattle's last night to see Hari Kondabolu, who is not only super fucking funny but is super fucking smart—he's leaving us to get a graduate degree (in human rights or something equally virtuous) at the London School of Economics.

But enough about tomorrow. Let's talk about tonight!

There'll be Hari (who, in recent months, has appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live and the HBO Comedy Festival in Aspen and was too good for both of them), all the People's Republic of Komedy kids, Dan Moore, David Cope, Dartanion London, Scott Moran, Kevin Richards, and a screening of Hari's short film called Manoj, made in conjunction with the badasses down at Massline Media.

Dear Hari: We're sorry to see you go.

Dear Everybody Else: Go send him off! At Laff Hole! Tonight! Chop Suey! 10 pm! Go!

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