A San Antonio couple is accused of trying to trying to trade sex with the woman's 5-year-old daughter for an apartment, a used car and child care for her 10-month old daughter.

Jennifer Richards, 25, and her married boyfriend, Sean Michael Block, 40, appeared before U.S. Magistrate Judge Nancy Stein Nowak on Friday.... According to an affidavit, the investigation began when an informant told the FBI about a text message allegedly sent by Block reading: "Nice piece 5 yrs old belongs to my gf and she wants to sell it."

Richards and Block crafted a deal that, in addition to the apartment and used car, included child care for Richards' 10-month-old daughter, whose sexual service the couple intended to sell later, Rex Miller, the FBI's lead agent on the case, testified.

Thanks to Slog tipper Shannon.

A Poulsbo woman was jailed after being accused of beating up her fiance at their prenuptial party.

Kitsap County sheriff's deputies say 31-year-old Amber Barnes' 12-year-old son told her he saw her fiance kissing one of her women friends early Thursday morning.

Deputies say Barnes gave her friends the boot, told her fiance to leave, too, and then started hitting him in the face.

I'm thinking police might want to check with that 12 year-old. Was he pleased about his new step-dad-to-be? Was he the only witness to the alleged kissing of-one of mom's friends? Hm...

Where is the outrage, gang?

I'm reading this story—which includes a picture that provides readers with a glimpse of hairy manass (look to the right and down)—and it's the usual collapse-of-western-civilization stuff. Regan "Draco" Lane-Smith and "Naughty" Nonah Elliston are running a sex club in the suburbs, blah blah blah, and the neighbors are upset, blah blah blah, and—ZOMFG!—think of the children! (For the record: I wouldn't want to live next door to a straight swinger's club, or have to explain to my kid what goes on in one.) But it isn't until paragraph nine—nine!—that we learn something that should concern the Super Friends of the Super Sacred Institution of Marriage.

Elliston, 40, and Lane-Smith, 39, met at a swingers party in Puyallup seven years ago and married three years later....

A few years into their marriage, they decided to find a house that would perfectly suit them and their hobby. They spent six months searching. They wanted to be clear of schools and churches.

Again, where's the outrage? Marriage is, according to the Super Friends of the Super Sacred Institution of Marriage, all about children. Gay people, the SFSSIM argue, should not be allowed to marry because we don't have children. (Except when we, you know, do.) And marriage, according to the SFSSIM, is all about monogamy, which gay men aren't very good at.

Well, Elliston and Lane-Smith are childless and they're clearly not monogamous—and they're married! Legally married! Surely this legally married couple, willfully childless and cheerfully non-monogamous, represent a greater threat to the Super Sacred Sanctity of Marriage than gay couples do. For crying out loud, SFSSIM, Elliston and Lane-Smith recruit. They advertise! They encourage other straight married couples to adopt their non-monogamous lifestyle, to come to their parties, to ride on their sex swings and swim naked in their pool.

Where's the organized movement to strip people like this—a real and present threat to the super sacred sanctity of marriage—of their right to marry?

Hello? Super Friends?

Anyway, it's great that this troubled kid had a mom and a dad, a traditional family and was exposed to the kind of traditional family values that are so important to John McCain.

It's awkward, of course, that kid plotted with his mother to murder his step-father, and it's sad that he won't be able to recreate the kind of traditional family structure that he was exposed to at home until he gets out of prison in twenty or thirty years. But, hey, at least he had a mother and a father—until, you know, he shot his father four times in the back of the head.

Man with rifle and 10lbs of pot caught driving over 90mph while taping himself masturbating

Here's a link to a more complete story, from the Northern Territory News. This man is an end-of-days hero, Mad Max incarnate, speeding through the Australian bush with a whole lot of pot and a whole lot of testosterone.

Sgt Edwards said Mr Erhardt was arrested and told officers he had "found'' the drugs at a rest stop 100km north of Coober Pedy -- and he intended to smoke all of it at his Noonamah home.

Mr Erhardt also told police he had used the rifle to shoot "kangaroos from the vehicle whilst driving north.''

Mr Erhardt applied twice for bail last week so he could get married before going to jail.

Mr. Erhardt is also a father of three.

Thanks to Slog tipper Matthew.

(Thanks, Hickey.)

To find out what these boys have been up to, click on the photo.

Via Towleroad.

An Illinois woman faces at least 15 years in prison after pleading guilty to doping her 6-year-old twin girls with cough syrup and taking nude pictures of them with her boyfriend.

(Thanks, Julia.)

I have no idea what this means. It's inscrutable on so many levels.

Via Tech Master Brian G., who reports that the peaches were delicious.

Grand Archives were playing the Triple Door. I was going because that sort of thing is kind of my beat here (and because, hey, Grand Archives). Brad was going because he knows all those dudes form back in Jesuit school or whatever. So we combined forces to seek out somewhere to drink downtown before the show. After being rebuffed at a few overcrowded yuppie bars, we ended up down at the Alibi Room, drinking bourbon at the bar. We talked about the ladies. We talked about life. We were about go watch Grand Archives. You know, real guy stuff. And it was sweet. I get the feeling that, if I had come around a little earlier, or if Brad was sticking around a little longer, he might've imparted a lot of dudely wisdom upon me. Or at least more bourbon.

Now it's gonna be all ladies and fags around here. Thanks, Brad.

Prosecutors investigating the killing in Italy last year of the British student Meredith Kercher today laid formal charges of murder against her American flatmate, Amanda Knox, Knox's Italian boyfriend, Raffaele Sollecito, and Rudy Guede, a citizen of the Ivory Coast.

A judge in the central Italian city of Perugia must now decide whether they should be put on trial. Because of the gravity of the charges, under Italian law the judge must now arrange a closed-doors preliminary hearing to review the evidence and decide if there is sufficient evidence for an indictment.

This is Amanda months and months before the murder of her roommate, Meredith...

If she is tried, found guilty, and sentenced, this might be her in some sad and sunless cell in the far future...

Oh, the heartland.

Slog tipper Brie noticed an odd detail in the report:

The men went to the cemetery with shovels, a crowbar, a tarpaulin, and a box of condoms, which the men had purchased that evening on their way to the cemetery.

Why condoms, Brie asks? Considering how few young men seem to think they need to use condoms with living, breathing, ovulating women, it seems odd that these young men would think to purchase a box of condoms on the way to a cemetery. Perhaps these boys know something about embalming fluid that we don't—maybe it burns?—or maybe they were worried about catching the mother of all cooties. Details will, presumably, come out during the trial, so we'll be staying tuned to WISC-TV for complete coverage.

Marengo police arrested Smith Monday night after his ex-wife reported that the couple's children—a 10-year-old girl and twin 9-year-old boys—returned home from a visit with their father sporting numerous welts on their bodies, the police said. When questioned, Smith admitted shooting the children with small, plastic pellets fired from an air-powered gun, Deputy Police Chief Joseph Hallman said.

"He said the children were willing participants," Hallman said. "I don't know if it was some kind of a game with them or what he was doing."

If it was a game, it was completely one-sided. The children, Hallman said, told police they never fired a shot back at their dad.