My best nightmare.

Is he now a born again?

And for the rest of his life his friends will be making the "Remember that time you were in a huge vagina, or should I be more specific" joke.

Cienna Madrid has gone back to school, and in Germany?

It's like an episode of "Leave it to Beaver," only with a vagina.

Did they use the pull out method? He won't cum near it again.

It was featured in Dlisted, that's my Morning News.

My nightmare.

My thoughts went to a mishap in the prop warehouse where they stored the vagina from Almodovar's film-within-a-film, the Shrinking Lover, from Talk to Her.

It really doesn't look like a vagina.

I wonder if it crossed anyone's mind to apply some sort of lubricating element to the guy. Kinda the way you soap up your finger to pull off a stuck ring. Or something.

@13: I'm sure it occurred to a lot of people, but they didn't want to be the first to say it!

Surely he could have driven out if he had just been able to find his car keys.

I like how the hats worn by the German feuerwehr ("fire defense") look like World War II army helmets. I'm sure Hitler would be proud. And in a way, isn't this event just a metaphor for the war itself, particularly coming right after the anniversary of the D-Day "invasion"? The Allies penetrated the hot, wet, vulnerable beach-pussy of the Reich, and "beat off" the German protectors of purity, ultimately plowing through the Arc de Triomph with massive force, restoring the honor of feminine La France.

And even the "II" in World War II is semiotic of a hairless pussy, don't ya think?. I could go on and on about all the historical parallels here.

This thread is full of win, but I do prefer HNTP's version over Dan's NYDN link.

@16: I appreciate the metaphor, but there was nothing vulnerable about the beaches of Normandy, excepting only as compared with other beaches. Many men, great, small, but all bravely serving both their country and the greater good, spent their lives upon those shores.

Also, clearly if you're going to make a World War 2 sex joke you should start with the Battle of the Bulge.

@18: Vulnerable is as vulnerable does. Every good beach-fucker knows that.

Also, re the Battle of the Bulge-- it happened about six months later after initial penetration, before being aborted. Hmm...

The @16, I'm impressed, a WWII/Nazi metaphor in a comments thread that actually isn't the least bit Godwinish. Kudos.

@11, I first thought something like that too.

Leave it to an American male to make a fool of himself on a dare abroad.

@16 Actually the Allies didn't want to march through nor liberate Paris. They were in a hurry to get to Berlin before the Russians did.

Only a column went there, because the French absolutely insisted. And when the march through Paris was organized, the English and the Americans imposed on the French not to let their non-white troopers be seen on the parade, because "it would send the wrong message home".

As for the virile American soldiers invading the female France, let's not joke about it, all right ? The American soldiers (so-called allied) raped far more French women in a few months, than the Germans did in 4 years.

He thought there'd be more womb in there. I'm sure he'll get ovary it, but his friends'll never get their fill o' peein' on him about it.

I hear they used forceps.

@23: "the French absolutely insisted"

They were wise to do so. This prevented an Allied military government taking over France.

You see this? This is why you should never go in dry.