Wait, are you saying we should ignore your advice or ignore your advice to ignore your advice?

@3: Precisely.

Straight sub girls are not the ones for whom this is an issue.

I met an outstanding gentleman on OKC just about six months ago who, after paragraphs and paragraphs i the profile that detailed his other interests, mentioned he was often complimented for being able to give a very sexy spanking.

He was right; he does.

@1: I'm going to give you the same benefit of the doubt that I give Dan and assume that you just haven't asked very many girls about their online dating experiences, but there is literally no way to be a woman looking for men on an online dating site without attracting zillions of "the wrong kind of men." The answer to this is to delete their messages, not significantly change the text of your profile.

I'm a little more inclined to agree with you on the straight guys not putting that they're kinky, but honestly, if a guy does it right it's no big deal.

Well played, Mr Savage.

Thinking of kink as a spectrum, just how kinky is "dominant male" or "submissive female" anyway? It just seems as if the bar is much lower for submissive males and dominant females, who are out of the norm basically right out of the box. But, if the same applied the other way around, then surely about 90% or so of all evangelicals would qualify as kinky, which would create major LMBs all around. Considering how many people think the "innate" model for opposite-sexer relationships is for the male to exercise authority to which the female submits, it actually feels rather normative, and it might be useful to have general recognition of where the bar is set for the point at which MD>FS becomes what would generally be recognized as kinky in order to avoid the term becoming fuzzy. It just seems lately as if OS men and women define the K word differently, with men loath and women eager to adopt the label.

I am envisioning a scenario in which a woman who thinks she's quite kinky and a man who thinks he's completely vanilla meet up and, in a reversal of the recent SLLotD couple, her version of kink amounts to one light tap passing for a spanking, while his version of vanilla amounts to stopping short of black and blue.

And that particular advice was wrong. Not "individual results may vary", just wrong.