Comments

1
Wow, this is frankly Loughneresque.
2
I once found an essay very like this tucked into a castoff Pee-Chee.
3
Is it just me or did the stranger just 'revise' their disclaimer
4
I got as much out of this as I did a typical current M. Night Shyamalan film.
5
Mr. Dale sure seems passionate about the sound of his own voice.
6
What I get out of this gibberish is "not even I give a shit about what I think about anything".
7
Thou shalt not Phythonize thy bigotry, the 11th commandment.

(...sorry, gus? I didn't hear you say "shot"....chop chop!)
8
To think, this is just the tip of the iceberg
9
whiskey ?.. i think i need weed.
10
Lorem ipsum delirium...
11
well, see God and teh Devil...they're the same.
12
tl;dr: fucktard
13
Canuck, hello, thank you for the wakeup that it's time for a SHOT! Only three more posts allowed per the Strangercrombie rules, tickticktick...
14
We'll be booking space at the java rehab clinic by the weekend, gus...
15
and riz @9, the shot can be a sexy sexy blowback off a joint if you prefer, how nice indeed.
16
*ahem*.. umm.. let me fix my weave first..ok... where's my lighter ?
17
Ok that....
Dammit it was incomprehensible!
I sat here with my eyes getting squintier and squintier, and my brow getting wrinklier and wrinklier, and I came up with…….Dennis fears he may have multiple personality disorder?
There's going to be more than ONE Manhattan when I get home this evening let me tell you!
18
@15: Hmm. Sexy blowback. You make a persuasive argument Gus. Very persuasive indeed.
19
I'm actually feeling OK with this one and it was shorter than the WNBA article. Dale is no Camus, though.
20
@18 I know, sadder and sadder I don't live in Seattle...
21
@20: SERIOUSLY!! Hey, are you on Facebook? Or am I being too forward? Should I meet your parents first?
22
It takes a man of many talents to frolick and shamble simultaneously.
23
Heh. No, I don't do The Facebook...too many old boyfriends in the woodwork...but I would lurve to make it to Slog happy one of these days and meet up with my besties...mwah!
24
Hey, Dennis Dale's daughter!

Instead of buying op-ed space on The Stranger, could you make sure your dad is taking his medication? Cuz it's all shits and giggles until he opens fire in a kindergarten.
26
This is like attentuated Mudede.
27
Are you guys sure this is only Loughner-esque? I don't think y'all are taking Dale seriously enough, or despising him adequately. Needs more . . . reflex, and even less taste.
28
@27 Are you sure the word you're looking for isn't "reflux"?
29
"WAITER: Well, you look like you're getting the idea, so why don't I give you these, uh, conversation cards? They'll tell you a little about philosophical method,..."

it craps me that there's an 's' in his name...
30
@23 Don't keep us waiting 4eva, Canuck. Slog Happy, Canuck Edition will be epic. You'll sail into the sound on an illegal iceberg turned rave boat, and ride up to the chosen bar on polarbear-back (get your mind out of the gutter) where we'll all be waiting in our finiest.
31
You should, Canuck. I enjoyed the Slog Happy that I attended. It is fun to see everyone in person.
32
Dennis, you poor guy. Let me try to help you make a point.

The target audience for the NBA are those who want to see basketball played by the best players in the world.

The target audience for the WNBA, apparently, are those who want to see basketball played by people without penises.

It's a free country, and people can watch whatever kind of basketball they want. But isn't it kind of strange that the latter audience, small as it is, even exists? I mean, how does the absence of penises on the court make the game more compelling to these folks? One wonders if the WNBA's audience has something against people with penises.

But shit, I prefer the NBA, so what do I know.
33
OuterCow, I love that you know me enough to assume that I'll read something sexay into that, because you are right! (Okay, polar bear is simply mode of transport, got it, whatever....no fun...) and Kim, oh I would dearly love to meet all of you, that would be amazing! (You guys have Jagermeister there, right??) Hide yer lampshades and get out the 1975 disco tunes, oi!!!
34
@33: Yes, we have Jagermeister, but more importantly, we have Fireball, which is certainly among the best liquors ever produced in the Great White North.

If you go, I may just have to get off my ass and go myself.
35
What is this "Fireball" of which you speak, seandr? It sounds like something I could develop a rewarding relationship with...yes, if I ever make it to Slog Happy, I'll be disappointed if you and the drag queens fail to attend...
36
@26, PRECISELY what I was thinking. Dennis writes like Charles, if Charles were sent to a WASP-run deprogramming camp, forced to read Ayn Rand over and over for months, and then turned loose on a bottle of Drambuie and a 1998-vintage iMac.
37
Dennis: that level of detachment is not normal. My dreams have the third-person aspect you describe, but I'd be worried if my life did. You might want to have yourself checked out.
38
@35: Oh it would be EPIC if you came to a Slog Happy. I would take the day OFF for that. And there might be cupcakes again........(wanders off in a blissful haze)
39
Mmmmmm, cupcakes. Cupcakes, booze, and sassy chat. Westjet flies to Seattle, hmmm...Sounds like a plan, Lissa...
40
As a former writing TA at a prestigious university I can confidently say that this essay resembles the drivel submitted by freshman bros who just read some Nietzsche and suddenly think they're all deep and interesting and stuff.

Your thoughts and ideas are not unique. Your writing is opaque, bordering on unreadable. Your 'philosophical' arguments are weak and self-serving.

Go read some Kierkegaard and get over yourself.
41
@35: It's a delicious cinnamon whiskey. Tastes best straight from the freezer. Fireball shots make for very yummy kisses.
42
Mmmmm..Fireball whiskey. I'm out of that, as well. (Vodka, Gin and Fireball all out at once? What am I doing with my life?)

Canuck, if you're heading over there for a SLOG happy, you better tell me. I'll see if I can get a trip across the country the same week as well. Although, the Toronto sloggers also need to remind you how excited we are to plan a SLOG North based on you making it to the centre of the world (I kid, I kid).

Haven't figured out what to have as my shot, yet. Will post again with my drink choice.
43
OK. 1.5 oz Malibu coconut, 1 oz Malibu pineapple. A piña colada martini!
44
@43: Yummy!
45
Dick Laurent is dead.
46
@41 Oooo, cinnamon whiskey...be still, my beating heart, that does sound yum indeed...

Canadian Nurse, although I am slightly worried that meeting me in person will be a big let down ("what? no glitter fingernails? no 7 inch lucite heels??") I would love, love, love to part of Slog Happy Canada, we would, of course, need one laptop (laptop, OuterCow, not lapdance, sheesh!) and an open thread on which to post our progressing inebriation...I will bring my iPod with the "Disco!" mix ("shake your GROOVE thing...")
47
@40: "As a former writing TA at a prestigious university...."

Let me guess what you are now: Senior barista at a mall coffee shop.

Go read some Marmaduke and get over yourself.
48
Oh Lex, Superman will never be your boyfriend......
49
@15. One more thumbs up here for the sexy blowback. My evening is complete.
50
And Dennis, having consistent feelings of depersonalization is a concern. Perhaps consider talking to your family doctor about it at some time.
51
Ziggity @1: Wow, this is frankly Loughneresque.

I was going to write, "This is kinda what Jared Loughner will sound like in about 30 years (if he doesn't get the death penalty)." Good to know the first commenter had the same reaction.
52
Dick Laurent is dead.

Best. Comment. Ever.

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