Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« "Our children need a mother an... | Halloween Favors Obama »

Monday, October 13, 2008

”We turned a lot of backyards into an oasis.”

posted by on October 13 at 10:17 AM

monicabellucci.jpgFor those looking for hot business opportunities, consider the market for this commodity: fake palm trees:

About 50 percent of the business is still residential, but commercial customers now demand half of his attention. A growing number of them are communities or telephone companies interested in hiding the ”visual pollution” of cell towers.

Beringer said he’s in a niche with few competitors, and aided by a weak dollar that makes American products more affordable to foreign buyers he’s been fielding requests from El Salvador to India.

The disguised cell towers, in particular, ”are becoming quite popular” overseas, he said. The artificial palm trees can be as tall as 130 feet. In northern locations, the same processes are used to mimic pine trees, he said.

Beringer uses a lot of rubber and plastic in creating the outdoor palms, while indoor displays are
made of silk or preserved fronds (real leaves that are treated to retain their appearance.)

Even real palm bark can be hollowed out to accept a PVC core, or peeled off its source and reinforced with a cardboard lining so it snaps around unattractive poles to create instant foliage.

Beringer installs the trees himself, from pouring concrete to which 18-foot-tall trees can be bolted, to shaping the fronds into a realistic green cascade.

The best and most erotic part of this report: “…pouring concrete to which 18-foot-tall trees can be bolted…”

RSS icon Comments

1

Bless you, Charles, for bringing a little tropical light to our grey Monday.

Posted by Uncle Vinny | October 13, 2008 10:11 AM
2

Charles, why why why do you objectify women in pretty much every post you ever write? Is there some sort of philosophy behind it? Do you believe that women exist simply for your sexual gratification? Maybe if you could give a rational reason for this, we the readers could find you a bit less despicable.

Posted by olechka | October 13, 2008 10:11 AM
3

Please post more recipes with palm fronds in them. (Delicious.)

Posted by LDP | October 13, 2008 10:14 AM
4

Could you please post another lady, possibly with more T&A? This one is a little too "dance 10, looks 3" for my taste.

Posted by Mikki | October 13, 2008 10:14 AM
5

@2, why do you assume that Charles believes women exist SOLELY for his gratification? Certainly no one could disagree that they exist IN PART for that reason, for him and for everyone sexually oriented towards them. So where are you getting this "simply" from?

Oh, wait -- it's October. Classes have started. Duh.

I would like to point out that most workplaces don't make a lot of fine distinctions in their prohibitions. "Using office computers to view pictures of naked women" doesn't usually make any allowances for angles of view or bits that are visible.

Posted by Fnarf | October 13, 2008 10:17 AM
6

@2 if you really knew Mudede you would know that this post was really an excuse to eroticize about and objectify concrete.

Posted by vooodooo84 | October 13, 2008 10:19 AM
7

A few more years of global warming and the real thing will be native to Kent.

Posted by John Bailo | October 13, 2008 10:25 AM
8

@2
Settle down Mabel.

Posted by Don't Spoil My Monday | October 13, 2008 10:39 AM
9

#6 You are right. I don't really know Mudede. This is why I am giving this the benefit of the doubt and trying to understand how his view of women relates to to posting nude photos of them next to totally unrelated posts. Because maybe there is some actual relevance I am missing.

#5 Classes may have started, but I do not see how my PhD courses in Chemical Engineering are relevant, do you? Even though I happen to be a woman, I also happen to be attracted to them. So I very much enjoy the female body, and photos of such. However, I cannot help but think that Charles uses these women and their bodies as decoration, completely irrelevant to the point of the post. If he had a series of posts titled: sexy girlie pictures, then great. But he is discussing politics, or economics, or whatever, and this seems like he only sees women's contribution to these subjects as relevant if they are showing T&A.

Posted by olechka | October 13, 2008 10:43 AM
10

wack wack wack, huh charles?

Posted by superyeadon | October 13, 2008 10:43 AM
11

@9---Charles' posts help me whenever people point out how sexualized gay culture is. The man can't write fake palms without including naked women. At least he avoided his favorite pompous third person style of "What do we see? We see..."

Oh ugh... I dont know why I bother....he obviously doesn't care what others think of his puerile ramblings here...

Posted by Hartiepie | October 13, 2008 10:49 AM
12

I'm about as rabid feminist as they come, but Charles' posts don't bother me for some reason. Maybe it's because I get the sense that he genuinely likes women, which is an all too uncommon trait among straight men.

Posted by keshmeshi | October 13, 2008 10:51 AM
13

Whatever. I'm as critical of Mr Mudede as the next slogger, but in this case, keep the great photos coming, Charles.

I've seen those fake-tree cell towers. They look like absolute shit, not sure they are an improvement over the basic ugly functional cell tower.

Posted by Karlheinz Arschbomber | October 13, 2008 11:14 AM
14

Charles has been auditioning to be Playboy's House Pundit for how many years now?

Posted by michael strangeways | October 13, 2008 11:26 AM
15

Is it really Monica?

Posted by Greg | October 13, 2008 11:36 AM
16

@11 "we" is first person

sorry, i just had to.

and i hate chaz's use of women as decoration, too. blech.

Posted by erin | October 13, 2008 11:40 AM
17

@16--you're right, of course. I was thinking of first person plural and the royal We, and how readers are expected to agree with The Writer etc but I messed up....

Posted by hartiepie | October 13, 2008 11:53 AM
18

hi erin. olechka is olga by the way. funny.

Posted by olechka | October 13, 2008 11:58 AM
19

Charles, do you have any photos of this chick showing copper and bush?

If so, please post.

Posted by Frank Sinclair | October 13, 2008 12:18 PM
20

"In northern locations, the same processes are used to mimic pine trees"

Wait, what? Northern locations? How come I've seen these in Los Angeles then?

Posted by brian | October 13, 2008 11:01 PM

Comments Closed

Comments are closed on this post.