Religion “God Told Me To Bone You”
posted by October 30 at 13:20 PMon
I’m paraphrasing, but that subject-line statement is essentially the pick-up line used by a Catholic priest who allegedly slept with a woman he met in his confessional.
From ABC News:
A Catholic priest allegedly seduced a distraught woman after hearing her confession, telling her to have an affair with him because it was “ordained by God,” the Queens, N.Y., woman claims in a lawsuit.
According to the lawsuit, Father Elvis Elano professed his love for her immediately after her first confession at the Church of Our Lady of the Snows in Queens, N.Y. “Your presence struck me like a thunderbolt,” Elano allegedly told Rodrigues-Lytwyn, who says she was distraught over her recent divorce and her ex-husband’s alleged drug use.
The lawsuit, first reported by The Smoking Gun, claims Elano immediately began courting her and encouraging her to have sex with him to overcome her grief over her divorce and “because it was ordained by God.”
Rodrigues-Lytwyn “immediately became overwhelmed” by Elano’s advances and embarked on a four-month-long affair with him, the lawsuit says.
Extra-creepy closing details:
According to the lawsuit, Elano ordered Viagra over the Internet and arranged sexual encounters with Rodrigues-Lytwyn at her house and at a hotel in Montauk, N.Y. She claims she broke off her relationship after Elano admitted that he had developed a rash in his groin area and legs.
So, God ordained the affair, but refused to help Father Elano with his erectile disfunction or protect the priest from whatever rashed up his groin. Full story here.